On why cut flowers are the worst gift...

[smjor]

If I gave you a lovely painting for your birthday how stoked would you be if I showed up a week later to take it back? Flowers are a lovely thing to look at, but only for a little while. I think they are an especially poor choice if one is trying to express one's love for another. To me, a dozen roses says, "Like my love for you, these roses are

Comments

[smjor]

A potato is terrific. It is also full of carbs, so another message it sends is, "I will love you even if you are fat and lumpy."

My favourite plant to gift is aloe vera. Not only is it a low maintenance plant it is also useful, just like a potato. I think it sends the message of "If you burn yourself while making me a pie, I will put aloe on your burn so that you can keep cooking."

[diapholom]

you have too many kinky courtly love issues

but you've been burned badly & someone has to pick up your pieces, rebuild it & make you feel brand new
make you his perfect drug (NIN)

someone should give you a pet monkey, the message is "i'll pick fleas from your head & eat them"