fic: so magical (merlin/arthur)
i. uhm. WHAT.
so magical
merlin/arthur
PG-13
in which merlin accidentally turns himself into a girl for a few days, because sometimes these things just happen. title from i kissed a girl, because i like to think i'm funny /o\
"I think, uh. I think I have a bit of a problem," Merlin begins.
This is something of an understatement.
-
It's really all Arthur's fault.
Merlin is willing to admit that yes, he was the one who cast the spell in the first place. And yes, it's true that it was his own handwriting he couldn't read properly, which is probably the reason the spell went so wrong. It is also not a lie to say that Merlin hadn't really been concentrating as hard as he perhaps ought to have been.
The point, though, is that if Arthur hadn't been in one of his moods and told Merlin to go away and stop fussing around his room (like Arthur told him to), Merlin wouldn't have had enough free time to even consider practicing some magic. He then wouldn't have cast the spell at all, so.
Arthur's fault, hands down.
-
Gauis looks at Merlin, and then does a double-take and looks at him again. He doesn't say anything for a long time, just raises one eyebrow, surveying the damage. He then eventually comes out with, "I see."
"A lot of a problem, maybe," Merlin amends, and Gauis nods. "You might say it's, er. A bit colossal."
"I don't think I quite know what you want me to do about it," Gauis says, and Merlin has a momentary urge to stamp his feet or wave his arms around and yell something along the lines of make it better.
"Do you have any idea of how to -- to, you know. Turn me back to normal?" Merlin says. He possibly sounds a little bit desperate, but he feels desperation is a perfectly understandable emotion to convey, given his current situation and appendages.
"I'm not sure," Gauis says slowly. "I've never dealt with something quite like this."
Merlin is not particularly surprised by this information.
"Is it just the," Gauis gestures towards Merlin's chest, "or... everything?"
"It's everything," Merlin mutters quickly, and hopes fervently that he will never have to even refer to his genitals in front of Gauis again.
-
Arthur has considerably more of a reaction than Gauis did. He walks into Merlin's room, says, "Why are you not--" and then stops short, staring, somewhat transfixed, at Merlin's brand new breasts.
Merlin crosses his arms defensively over his chest, and feels angry and indignant and mildly violated by the way Arthur is looking at him. He's thankful that Arthur knows about his magic by now, because this would be awfully hard(er) to explain if he didn't, but that's the only thing he's even remotely pleased about in the current situation.
"Merlin," he says, loudly and accusingly, eyes wide, "you've got tits!" He then throws the open door behind him a look that's so alarmed Merlin would be amused, were the circumstances different. Arthur closes it quickly. "Tits!" he says again.
"If you laugh, I'll kill you in your sleep and make it look like an accident," Merlin informs him as he sees the corners of Arthur's mouth twitch up slightly. "Sire," he adds.
"Did you turn yourself into a girl using magic, Merlin?" Arthur asks. "Don't lie about it. You know you can't lie."
Merlin had vague intentions of pretending it was some other sorcerer's handiwork, but Arthur, annoyingly, has a point. "It was an accident," he says instead, hotly.
Arthur stares at him for a few moments more and then bursts out laughing, and Merlin wonders if they'd make him clean Arthur's sheets, if he bled all over them when Merlin killed him.
-
They're pretending that Merlin is ill, to keep him out of everyone's (Uther's) way, so he's lying in bed with his covers pulled up around his chin when Gauis comes in under the pretense of delivering some medicine.
"I can't find much out about reversing these sorts of spells," Gauis tells him. "It's not often things seem to go quite so... far from the intended results. It might take a while."
Merlin hates everyone. It's not even that he has anything against breasts; he thinks they're pretty splendid, for the most part, but he just. He doesn't like them on his chest, and he just wants to go back to normal. "Well can you please hurry up?" he says. He tries to make his eyes as wide as possible, in the way he's seen some girls do when they want to get something out of someone.
He's not sure, but he thinks Gauis' shoulders are shaking slightly with suppressed laughter as he leaves the room.
-
"So," Arthur says to Merlin --
(to Merlin's breasts)
-- "So, what's it like?"
"What's what like?" Merlin mutters. He sounds petulant. Some might even go as far to say he's sulking, but he prefers to think of it as being extremely reluctant to adjust to the way the weight is distributed differently on his body now and he keeps feeling like he's about to overbalance every time he moves around too quickly.
"Having -- you know! Being a girl!" Arthur's mouth, as ever, twitches slightly, as though it's taking him a considerable amount of self-control not to laugh. Merlin can't decide whether to appreciate that small effort, or feel offended that Arthur is still doing such a poor job of masking his amusement.
"It's completely different and I have a new found appreciation of flowers and the sunset and riding sidesaddle on horses and I think I'd like to borrow one of Morgana's corsets," Merlin says dully.
"Really?"
Merlin looks at Arthur for a moment. And then another, just for good measure. "No."
"Oh," Arthur says (to Merlin's breasts). He sounds slightly sad. "Well, how are you finding things, are you -- you know. Are you okay? You'll be able to change back, won't you?"
"I hope so," Merlin says. "And yeah, I'm alright. It's just. It's strange."
"Good," Arthur says, and looks slightly relieved. "Well then," he adds, fairly pointlessly, and then stands up and strides away to do something important.
-
The problem develops into several problems. The problems, as Merlin gathers over the subsequent few days, are as follows:
1. Arthur seems to be mildly obsessed with making sure Merlin still feels alright, and seems intent on doing so whilst remaining more than mildly transfixed with Merlin's new body,
2. Merlin notices this because he notices everything about Arthur anyway, and because his body notices everything Arthur does, and
3. Merlin is still a woman.
-
"People are beginning to wonder where you are," Arthur informs him. He's lounging on Merlin's bed, and has only complained about the lack of pillows twice so far, which Merlin thinks is quite commendable, really. For Arthur. "Morgana wanted to come and visit, make sure you were okay. Gwen, too. I told them you were horribly contagious."
"Oh, thanks," Merlin mutters. He rolls his eyes, but Arthur, of course, doesn't notice, because Arthur's eyes are fixed somewhat south of Merlin's face. Merlin always notices this, but occasionally, when Arthur is too close to him, he notices in ways that involve less irritance and more of a prickly, almost pleasant feeling creeping across his skin. "Look," he says, crossing his arms across his chest, "will you not?"
Arthur looks confused, and slightly offended. "What?!"
"Will you stop? With the staring, and the. The staring. No wonder Morgana is always so bloody annoyed with you, if this is what you're like!"
A stretch of silence follows, and starts to significantly outstay its welcome. Eventually, Arthur mutters, "I don't mean to."
His face slowly begins to colour.
"Sorry," he adds, even more quietly.
Red, Merlin thinks, may look regal and flattering when it's across Arthur's shoulders in the form of a cape, but is perhaps not the best shade for Arthur's face.
"You just. You look. Nice."
"Oh, bugger off," Merlin sighs, and to his considerable surprise, Arthur does.
-
Apparently, unknown to Merlin thus far, 'you look nice' in Arthur speak is in fact code for 'I would like to sneak down to your chambers at night and do all sorts of filthy things to you and your new ladyparts'.
And apparently, also unknown to Merlin, when he replies with 'bugger off', he actually means 'I am surprisingly okay with that, and Christ, please do that thing with your tongue again, don't stop now'.
-
When, a few days and a few long, long (hot and sweaty) nights later, Gauis comes to him and says, "I think I've got it. You should be all back to normal by tomorrow morning, if everything goes to plan," and Merlin feels slightly strange and strangely close to slightly disappointed, as well.
That's all Arthur's fault as well. Hands down, definitely, all over again.
-
Gauis looks at Merlin, and for the first time since Merlin woke up missing a Y chromosone, doesn't do a double-take. Merlin grins at him. "Well done, thank you, what did you do, what worked in the end? Thank you!" he says, all in a rush. He resists the urge to cup himself through the cloth of his trousers, as though to demonstrate that he's all back to normal, but doesn't quite manage to stop himself from gesturing somewhat gleefully to his crotch.
"I have my ways," Gauis says. He sounds irritatingly mysterious, and Merlin makes a mental note to ask the Dragon if Gauis has been taking notes on crypticisms. "I'm glad it worked. I'm glad you're feeling better," he adds hurriedly, as though Uther is going to show up at any moment, checking on Merlin himself.
"I'm feeling much better," Merlin agrees enthusiastically, and hardly even complains at all when Gauis gets him back to work immediately.
-
He's feeling rather less gleeful and enthusiastic an hour or so later, when it's time to wake Arthur. He also feels rather annoyed with himself for feeling that way; since he's himself again now, he shouldn't give a single second thought to how Arthur is going to react or what else it might change.
Arthur, though, simply blinks blurrily at him, says, "Oh hey, you're you again," (to Merlin's chest) but then tugs Merlin down into his bed regardless. Merlin feels the glee and enthusiasm rush hotly through his veins at once.
And that's all Arthur's fault, no doubt about it, only this time round, that's kind of okay.
-
"I might miss the multiple orgasms, though. They were nice," Merlin says reflectively, as he struggles to stay awake, because even post-coital sleep probably isn't allowed in the Prince's bed.
This is something of an understatement.
so magical
merlin/arthur
PG-13
in which merlin accidentally turns himself into a girl for a few days, because sometimes these things just happen. title from i kissed a girl, because i like to think i'm funny /o\
"I think, uh. I think I have a bit of a problem," Merlin begins.
This is something of an understatement.
-
It's really all Arthur's fault.
Merlin is willing to admit that yes, he was the one who cast the spell in the first place. And yes, it's true that it was his own handwriting he couldn't read properly, which is probably the reason the spell went so wrong. It is also not a lie to say that Merlin hadn't really been concentrating as hard as he perhaps ought to have been.
The point, though, is that if Arthur hadn't been in one of his moods and told Merlin to go away and stop fussing around his room (like Arthur told him to), Merlin wouldn't have had enough free time to even consider practicing some magic. He then wouldn't have cast the spell at all, so.
Arthur's fault, hands down.
-
Gauis looks at Merlin, and then does a double-take and looks at him again. He doesn't say anything for a long time, just raises one eyebrow, surveying the damage. He then eventually comes out with, "I see."
"A lot of a problem, maybe," Merlin amends, and Gauis nods. "You might say it's, er. A bit colossal."
"I don't think I quite know what you want me to do about it," Gauis says, and Merlin has a momentary urge to stamp his feet or wave his arms around and yell something along the lines of make it better.
"Do you have any idea of how to -- to, you know. Turn me back to normal?" Merlin says. He possibly sounds a little bit desperate, but he feels desperation is a perfectly understandable emotion to convey, given his current situation and appendages.
"I'm not sure," Gauis says slowly. "I've never dealt with something quite like this."
Merlin is not particularly surprised by this information.
"Is it just the," Gauis gestures towards Merlin's chest, "or... everything?"
"It's everything," Merlin mutters quickly, and hopes fervently that he will never have to even refer to his genitals in front of Gauis again.
-
Arthur has considerably more of a reaction than Gauis did. He walks into Merlin's room, says, "Why are you not--" and then stops short, staring, somewhat transfixed, at Merlin's brand new breasts.
Merlin crosses his arms defensively over his chest, and feels angry and indignant and mildly violated by the way Arthur is looking at him. He's thankful that Arthur knows about his magic by now, because this would be awfully hard(er) to explain if he didn't, but that's the only thing he's even remotely pleased about in the current situation.
"Merlin," he says, loudly and accusingly, eyes wide, "you've got tits!" He then throws the open door behind him a look that's so alarmed Merlin would be amused, were the circumstances different. Arthur closes it quickly. "Tits!" he says again.
"If you laugh, I'll kill you in your sleep and make it look like an accident," Merlin informs him as he sees the corners of Arthur's mouth twitch up slightly. "Sire," he adds.
"Did you turn yourself into a girl using magic, Merlin?" Arthur asks. "Don't lie about it. You know you can't lie."
Merlin had vague intentions of pretending it was some other sorcerer's handiwork, but Arthur, annoyingly, has a point. "It was an accident," he says instead, hotly.
Arthur stares at him for a few moments more and then bursts out laughing, and Merlin wonders if they'd make him clean Arthur's sheets, if he bled all over them when Merlin killed him.
-
They're pretending that Merlin is ill, to keep him out of everyone's (Uther's) way, so he's lying in bed with his covers pulled up around his chin when Gauis comes in under the pretense of delivering some medicine.
"I can't find much out about reversing these sorts of spells," Gauis tells him. "It's not often things seem to go quite so... far from the intended results. It might take a while."
Merlin hates everyone. It's not even that he has anything against breasts; he thinks they're pretty splendid, for the most part, but he just. He doesn't like them on his chest, and he just wants to go back to normal. "Well can you please hurry up?" he says. He tries to make his eyes as wide as possible, in the way he's seen some girls do when they want to get something out of someone.
He's not sure, but he thinks Gauis' shoulders are shaking slightly with suppressed laughter as he leaves the room.
-
"So," Arthur says to Merlin --
(to Merlin's breasts)
-- "So, what's it like?"
"What's what like?" Merlin mutters. He sounds petulant. Some might even go as far to say he's sulking, but he prefers to think of it as being extremely reluctant to adjust to the way the weight is distributed differently on his body now and he keeps feeling like he's about to overbalance every time he moves around too quickly.
"Having -- you know! Being a girl!" Arthur's mouth, as ever, twitches slightly, as though it's taking him a considerable amount of self-control not to laugh. Merlin can't decide whether to appreciate that small effort, or feel offended that Arthur is still doing such a poor job of masking his amusement.
"It's completely different and I have a new found appreciation of flowers and the sunset and riding sidesaddle on horses and I think I'd like to borrow one of Morgana's corsets," Merlin says dully.
"Really?"
Merlin looks at Arthur for a moment. And then another, just for good measure. "No."
"Oh," Arthur says (to Merlin's breasts). He sounds slightly sad. "Well, how are you finding things, are you -- you know. Are you okay? You'll be able to change back, won't you?"
"I hope so," Merlin says. "And yeah, I'm alright. It's just. It's strange."
"Good," Arthur says, and looks slightly relieved. "Well then," he adds, fairly pointlessly, and then stands up and strides away to do something important.
-
The problem develops into several problems. The problems, as Merlin gathers over the subsequent few days, are as follows:
1. Arthur seems to be mildly obsessed with making sure Merlin still feels alright, and seems intent on doing so whilst remaining more than mildly transfixed with Merlin's new body,
2. Merlin notices this because he notices everything about Arthur anyway, and because his body notices everything Arthur does, and
3. Merlin is still a woman.
-
"People are beginning to wonder where you are," Arthur informs him. He's lounging on Merlin's bed, and has only complained about the lack of pillows twice so far, which Merlin thinks is quite commendable, really. For Arthur. "Morgana wanted to come and visit, make sure you were okay. Gwen, too. I told them you were horribly contagious."
"Oh, thanks," Merlin mutters. He rolls his eyes, but Arthur, of course, doesn't notice, because Arthur's eyes are fixed somewhat south of Merlin's face. Merlin always notices this, but occasionally, when Arthur is too close to him, he notices in ways that involve less irritance and more of a prickly, almost pleasant feeling creeping across his skin. "Look," he says, crossing his arms across his chest, "will you not?"
Arthur looks confused, and slightly offended. "What?!"
"Will you stop? With the staring, and the. The staring. No wonder Morgana is always so bloody annoyed with you, if this is what you're like!"
A stretch of silence follows, and starts to significantly outstay its welcome. Eventually, Arthur mutters, "I don't mean to."
His face slowly begins to colour.
"Sorry," he adds, even more quietly.
Red, Merlin thinks, may look regal and flattering when it's across Arthur's shoulders in the form of a cape, but is perhaps not the best shade for Arthur's face.
"You just. You look. Nice."
"Oh, bugger off," Merlin sighs, and to his considerable surprise, Arthur does.
-
Apparently, unknown to Merlin thus far, 'you look nice' in Arthur speak is in fact code for 'I would like to sneak down to your chambers at night and do all sorts of filthy things to you and your new ladyparts'.
And apparently, also unknown to Merlin, when he replies with 'bugger off', he actually means 'I am surprisingly okay with that, and Christ, please do that thing with your tongue again, don't stop now'.
-
When, a few days and a few long, long (hot and sweaty) nights later, Gauis comes to him and says, "I think I've got it. You should be all back to normal by tomorrow morning, if everything goes to plan," and Merlin feels slightly strange and strangely close to slightly disappointed, as well.
That's all Arthur's fault as well. Hands down, definitely, all over again.
-
Gauis looks at Merlin, and for the first time since Merlin woke up missing a Y chromosone, doesn't do a double-take. Merlin grins at him. "Well done, thank you, what did you do, what worked in the end? Thank you!" he says, all in a rush. He resists the urge to cup himself through the cloth of his trousers, as though to demonstrate that he's all back to normal, but doesn't quite manage to stop himself from gesturing somewhat gleefully to his crotch.
"I have my ways," Gauis says. He sounds irritatingly mysterious, and Merlin makes a mental note to ask the Dragon if Gauis has been taking notes on crypticisms. "I'm glad it worked. I'm glad you're feeling better," he adds hurriedly, as though Uther is going to show up at any moment, checking on Merlin himself.
"I'm feeling much better," Merlin agrees enthusiastically, and hardly even complains at all when Gauis gets him back to work immediately.
-
He's feeling rather less gleeful and enthusiastic an hour or so later, when it's time to wake Arthur. He also feels rather annoyed with himself for feeling that way; since he's himself again now, he shouldn't give a single second thought to how Arthur is going to react or what else it might change.
Arthur, though, simply blinks blurrily at him, says, "Oh hey, you're you again," (to Merlin's chest) but then tugs Merlin down into his bed regardless. Merlin feels the glee and enthusiasm rush hotly through his veins at once.
And that's all Arthur's fault, no doubt about it, only this time round, that's kind of okay.
-
"I might miss the multiple orgasms, though. They were nice," Merlin says reflectively, as he struggles to stay awake, because even post-coital sleep probably isn't allowed in the Prince's bed.
This is something of an understatement.