Five | Action | Backdated to after Milkfield event

[snipingmissy]

- Morning, 1247 Williams Rd and anyone who wanders by the front door -

[Riza was still feeling painfully guilty about the things she'd done while being droned, and when she wasn't feeling guilty for attacking every person she came across she was trying to shove the memory of being murdered--and waking up fine the next day as if nothing had

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Evening, Park

[unexculpable]

[Ed couldn't stand staying in the house. It was bad enough that Lust was there, but now...? Now seeing her made him sick. The thought of her made him sick. He needed to be anywhere but that house and the park was as good of a place as any. He walked through the park, hands stuffed in his pockets, trying to keep his mind off of Lust and Hawkeye and Olivier and... and that man. DuPont. The man he killed.

Luckily, the perfect distraction decided to find him!

An excited bark sounded somewhere to his left. His brows furrowed and he turned to look, but all he could see was a black and white blur. A black and white blur that was very suddenly jumping up and shoving Ed back a few steps.

... A black and white blur that was so incredibly familiar. He steadied himself and grinned, squatting down to scratch the dog behind his ears.]

Black Hayate! How did you get here?

[and then his face gets licked. Ed doesn't care, he just laughs. Hayate you are the BEST distraction]

Lots of action, no speaking -_-

[snipingmissy]

[Hayate was so excited to see another familiar face that he was currently a fluffy ball of wiggles. When he's decided he's given Ed enough kisses, he rolls over and onto the grass, wagging his tail like he'd give just about anything to play. The ball he had been holding is next to him, and Hayate looks at it expectantly before looking at Ed, as if demanding to be played with.

Riza comes up all of five seconds later, and though she promised herself she wouldn't react oddly when seeing Edward next she couldn't help but stiffen. Obviously, he was back to his normal self and she knew that he would never have just stood and watched.

Even still, she couldn't help but freeze. She opened her mouth to tell Hayate to not accost Ed, but the words fell silent, and she just stared. Black Hayate, now torn between what he could tell was his distressed Mommy and a happy Edward rolled over into the grass, squeaking out a confused sound.]

sob

[unexculpable]

[bites his lip and grabs the ball]

What, you want the ball?

[He picks it up and tosses it up in the air a couple of times, watching Hayate's eyes follow it with anticipation. He pushes himself up off the ground, ready to throw the ball for him, but then he sees Riza. Just. Standing there.

And that look on her face. It made his stomach twist and writhe. He couldn't blame her. Ed had stood there and watched her die. Watched with a sickening smile as Lust sliced her throat open. Just. Watched.

His mouth goes dry and he struggles to find his voice]

E-evening, Lieutenant.

;-;

[snipingmissy]

[Hayate wags his entire little body with anticipation because yes he really did want that ball. But when Ed's expression changes, Hayate whines and turns back to Riza, walking slowly back to her and sitting at her feet.

Riza swallows, and nods politely at Edward, and slips her hands into her pockets, fingers balled into fists.]

Hello, Edward.

this is hideous

[unexculpable]

[Ed looks down, staring at his hands to avoid any and all eye contact. He tosses the ball back and forth between his hands a couple of times, trying to make it seem like his hands weren't shaking as he stood there. What should he say? Should he say anything? Should he apologize?]

When did Black Hayate show up?

All of the sad

[snipingmissy]

Just this morning.

[Hayate whines, looking up at Riza. Who has definitely turned a few shades paler since she ran into Edward. She debates quietly with herself about whether or not they should address the issue. Riza had already made the decision to not tell anyone that Edward was involved. When she'd explained what happened to Armstrong, she said nothing about Edward. Though she couldn't ever forget that Ed had been there--and certainly not the look on his face, the last thing she'd seen--she would keep his involvement to herself. After a moment, she swallowed and steeled herself.

Staring at each other like awkward children would not do. When she does speak again, her voice is tight and quiet, a far cry from her usual tone.]

I won't tell anyone, Edward.

and how!

[unexculpable]

[Ed expected that response and honestly it was the last thing he wanted to hear. What he did, even if he wasn't the one who put the blade to her throat, was just as bad, if not worse. Because all he did was watch. She had every right to be furious with him, but she wasn't. Riza didn't raise her voice in the slightest. She was so oddly quiet and before he lost his nerve he could have sworn he saw the color drain from her face. And that just made him feel worse. Not that he didn't deserve it. He assisted in Riza's death and outright murdered someone. He deserved it, but that didn't make it hurt any less.]

You don't have to do that, Lieutenant. You don't have to protect me. I... I know what I did. Don't stay silent for my sake. I don't deserve that.

;____; Definitely angsty enough

[snipingmissy]

Edward.

[Please don't make this harder.]

Stop it. Just...stop.

[Armstrong already had an inkling that she'd left out part of the story. And Lust, of course, knew. She kept her gaze on Hayate's ears, not trusting herself to meet his eyes just yet.]

Don't make this more difficult than it already is.

You were droned. You didn't have control over your actions.

[She sighed, and in an unusual display of anxiety she ran her fingers through her hair nervously.]

It's hard enough to separate that from everything else. Your lack of cooperation on my decision only makes it worse.

[Finally, she glances away, looking through the park. There was a lot more she wanted to say, some of it still that he had just stood there and watched, not even the slightest flicker of his normal self showing through the droned exterior. The thought was enough to send a chill down her spine, and Riza clears her throat, shaking her head.]

You were droned.

[The reminder was more for her benefit than his.]

are you sure I can make it more angsty if you want.

[unexculpable]

[even if she did look up, Ed sure as hell wasn't going to be able to look at her. He couldn't. All he cold think about was her and Lust with her spear to Riza's throat and him just standing there with an axe and a disgusting smile. A smile that scared the hell out of him. And then Mr.DuPont. Just thinking about his name made him want to vomit because Ed remembered every single last detail from their encounter. Every swing of the axe, every step, every breath, every single drop of blood that stained his hands.]

-- I killed someone that night. Mr. DuPont.

[the words fell from his lips before he could stop them. he didn't want to hide this from her, but he didn't want to say it right now, right here. A hard lump formed at the back of his throat and the mere thought of speaking hurt, but he couldn't just say that. He couldn't leave it like that. His voice was strained -- cracking and wavering, heavy and completely void of confidence.]

I killed someone. Damn it I --

I didn't want... I didn't want you to hear that from Lust. I --

[he

I think we can permanently have a monopoly on angst

[snipingmissy]

[Riza stiffened. That. She was definitely not expecting that. For a few seconds, she hesitates, and then approaches Ed. She stands arm's length away, and then weakly handed him a handkerchief from her pocket.

Droned. He was droned. He had been droned. That was why.

Even still, she hadn't been expecting that.

Riza had been the unfortunate comforter of many cadets older than her in Ishval who had killed for the first time. She remembered the night after her first time taking a life, sitting anxiously on her small sleeping bag, terrified. Mama!Hawkeye instinct took over despite her nerves, and she placed a hand on his shoulder. She remained otherwise silent, her fingers gently tightening on his shoulder in support.]

yeaaah i think so too

[unexculpable]

[he takes the handkerchief from her only because she held it out to him, but all he does is hold on to it, letting his hand drop back to his side. he was droned but he still killed someone it didn't matter why it happened or how it happened. he killed someone.

his breath hitched painfully in his chest when he felt her hand on his shoulder. why was she comforting him she shouldn't be. why wasn't she angry? how could she just push everything aside, everything he did, and comfort him? he was still trying to steel himself, still trying to force that lump down his throat, but somehow a choked sob managed to get past all of it. it wracked his entire body and suddenly he couldn't stop shaking. he closed his eyes, trying to stop the thick, silent tears that started to stream down his face.]

<3 ok I really hate myself for this tag

[snipingmissy]

[She could feel herself tense with the first sob, unsure of what to do. A part of her wanted desperately to not get any further involved, because she still struggled to rectify Edward standing here with her last--and substantially more terrifying--memory of the boy. But Riza couldn't just stand there and watch him cry.

Neither could Hayate, clearly, because the dog walked over and put his muzzle on Ed's shoe, whining. At least the dog had the good sense to react, because even as she thought maybe she should do something a bit more comforting than pat his shoulder she just couldn't. She couldn't do more than stand there and stare at his shoes helplessly and try not to cry herself. Because it currently took every ounce of self control to continue standing there; Riza had nothing left in reserve to muster the courage to look him in the eye and tell him what she knew: You didn't kill anyone. You were droned.And she couldn't say it because despite knowing it was the truth, she couldn't help but be haunted by the look in his eyes as she

shush it is beautiful ;A;

[unexculpable]

[Ed didn't expect her to. He didn't want her to. Riza was being far kinder than he deserved. he stood there, fists clenched against his side, staring at the ground. this was wrong. wrong, wrong, wrong. what was he still doing here? why was he still standing there?]

I'm... I'm sorry. I should go.

[his voice shook -- each word tight and strained. he couldn't stay. he shouldn't be here and he knew it.

Riza's hand slid off his shoulder as he stepped away, Black Hayate tilted his head with a whimper. And with that, Ed turned and started walking out of the park. He didn't know where he was going, but as long as it wasn't here or his house, he didn't care.]

brb crying forever [also this post is almost all Hayate]

[snipingmissy]

[Hayate followed after Ed with a whine, not happy to see one of his Mommy's friends walk off upset while Mommy looked upset too. He'd have to fix this, somehow, and he thought following Ed was the best way to do so. He followed the boy nearly to the end of the park before he could hear Mommy whistle for him, and sat on the ground, making the poutiest face a dog can make and whining at Ed.

Riza came up behind Hayate, her eyes following Ed's shoes as he walked, crouching down next to the dog and gently scratching his ears. She opened her mouth to reply, finding herself unable to form any coherent speech.

It wasn't until Edward was a few minutes gone that she remembered she had made cookies for him, too.]

[ooc: still don't heart this tag but..meh...