so i'm sitting in the apartment at school bored out of my mind and missing steve. i have high fidelity on the dvd for the 3rd time soley for background noise. i wish i could just walk around the apartment narrating my story to someone but there's not camera here to film me so that would just be me talking to myself, and that would mean i'm insane

so once again the bottom has fell out on me. my grade in spanish won't be changed from an f to a withdrawl and as a result i'm unable to get into the college of business. woop de freakin do. my family is disintegrating and i have to wait four months to be happy again. wow. well at least the girls convinced me that it would be a good decision ( Read more... )

i've been thinking a lot lately and for the first time i can honestly say that i'm in love.

so lately i don't really know what's going on. everything seems really overwhelming and i feel like i've lost control of everything (except my bladder, thank god). i don't really know what to do to get back the control i used to have. everything confuses me and i'm having mixed emotions about everything, constantly second guessing myself and not ( Read more... )

i think there is something in the air that is making people lose motivation. i know i'm definately losing my motivation. i don't want to do anything at all except go to my shack and just live. one good thing is that i'm suprisingly really excited for fall break...9 days and counting. there's some people i really want to see back at home. fall ( Read more... )

so i was thinking about some drunken advice i got this saturday. it was that i should think like a guy, to avoid attachment which leads to sadness. while i appreciate the advice and i respect and <3 the person who said it, there's this thing called a double standard. and because of this, i cannot think or act like a guy...it's sad. so i've ( Read more... )

i had a dream last night that you were going out of town again and i kept running trying to catch you, but i couldn't. and i woke up extrememly tired and didn't go to my 8am ( Read more... )

so i'm finally updating my journal again thanks to the advice of one of the coolest guys i know....doug callahan. and doug, i'm sure upon reading this entry you're gonna think one of two things: 1) whatever, she's lying or 2) i wonder what color underwear she's wearing. and the answers to those questions is 1) i am definately NOT lying, i feel ( Read more... )

family update from my mom ( Read more... )

you fit into me
like a hook into an eye

a fish hook

an open eye

-margaret atwood