Pilates makes me fart
My mom made up that phrase while we were talking about....how...Pilates makes me fart. Ahh...good times.
Today was hillarious.
Quote of the day: "Why do you have a girlfriend?"
-It's cheaper than a punching bag and she heals if I decide to stab her.
^^^^^Just me and Roger making up scenarios for what he could have said if that question was asked by my nosey aunt^^^^^^^^
IF YOU READ NOTHING ELSE YOU MUST READ THIS
Today in church I was bored so I tried to start thinking of things that I found amusing. So I started thinking about the 40-year Old Virgin. Then I thought of the part where he calls up the hot line because he's had a boner for more then 4 hours and the guy tells him to flick his testicals until it hurts so bad that his erection will go away. Then I started silently laughing. Then I thought about how I was silently laughing, which made me silently laugh harder. Then my brother and dad started staring at me and silently laughing. Then my mom gave as all the evil eye. Then all the silent laughter built up and I let out a laugh...then ten seconds later I snorted. And like a TON of people were staring at me. I think the only people that can really comprehend my laughing "spells" are Dave and maybe Nancy. But basically, they're these uncontrollable fits that usually occur unstimulated and they can not be stopped. Because every effort to stop them just makes them worse. I had one of those in church today...at Christmas Mass.
Other than that, I got gifts. They are:
-money
-an $100 neclace from my uncle! (but I guess it was on sale)
-a neclace with a real 4 leaf clover in it
-a watch
-a pickle ornamat (inside joke, if you wish to know details, i shall share)
-a growable boyfriend
-a pink zip up sweater (i think i might take it back)
-an ae sweater (i have to exchange it for the right size)
-a necklace with a shell
-a mall gift card
-a tank top
THE END!