Fic - The Art of Escapology
Title: The Art of Escapology
Characters: Jack/Ianto, thief
Rating: R
Summary: “If you ever wander off and leave me handcuffed to the bed again,” Ianto said flatly, “I will kill you.”
A/N: For jantolution challenge #12, reverse format (last scene first etc.)
“So,” Ianto said at last, letting his head fall back against the pillow as Jack moved again, trying to make him more comfortable in spite of their restraints, “nothing to worry about, then?”
Jack winced, and looked again at the locked hatch of his quarters, then the black silk tying his and Ianto’s ankles together and to the bottom corners of the bed, and the multiple pairs of handcuffs securing their wrists to the top corners in a similar fashion. Beneath him, Ianto gave a small and angry growl and made a visible attempt to relax.
“I said I was sorry,” Jack repeated, holding himself up on all fours and trying to ignore the part of his mind that had to keep reminding him he had Ianto tied up naked underneath him and he wasn’t doing anything about it. “Anyway, we’ll be fine. As soon as Gwen gets here in the morning -”
Ianto groaned and thumped his head against the pillow in frustration.
“She is never going to let us forget this,” he told Jack mournfully, and Jack nodded.
“Should’ve listened to you in the first place,” he sighed.
Ianto raised both eyebrows, saying, “Oh, now you realise that?”
Jack just smiled wryly, kissed his cheek, and did his best to keep most of his weight off Ianto for as long as possible. It could have been worse.
:::::xxxxx:::::
“Again,” Jack gasped, clenching his fist to get the blood flowing properly again. “On three.”
Ianto drew in a breath and squirmed against the handcuffs and bindings again, pulling himself as close to the side of the bed as he could manage.
“One,” Jack said, moving with him, pushing the handcuffs that locked Ianto’s wrist to the headboard as far up to his palm as they’d go, and pulling the other set (which bound their wrists together) as far down Ianto’s arm as possible.
“Two,” he continued, repeating the process with Ianto’s right arm, and fixing his attention on the key so tantalisingly close on the top of the bedside cabinet.
“Three!”
In unison, they strained towards the cabinet. Jack craned his neck frantically, trying to reach the key in the middle of the top, an inch away with no more give in their restraints and Ianto struggling not to make a sound as the cuffs dug into his skin and his arms twisted painfully.
After a few more seconds Jack gave up and moved back over, sighing.
Grimacing, Ianto shook the handcuffs back down his wrists.
“Sorry,” Jack said again, resting his forehead against Ianto’s collarbone, and Ianto shook his head.
“Try again. Keep trying. Get us out of this.”
Jack nodded, picked himself up again, and looked back at the key.
“On three, then,” he said softly.
:::::xxxxx:::::
Ianto heard Jack humming happily to himself on his way back shortly before the hatch opened up again and Jack slithered down the ladder.
And then he turned and saw that Ianto wasn’t in quite the same state as he’d left him, and the grin vanished from his face.
John pressed the gun harder against Ianto’s temple and leant back against the wall, sitting on the bedside cabinet with one foot drawn up casually.
“Oops?” he suggested, and Jack looked down at the tin of syrup in his hand as if considering throwing it at John’s head.
“Put it down,” John sighed, “and do what you do best. Get on top of eye candy here.”
Ianto made a muffled noise of fury around his makeshift gag and tugged uselessly at his bonds.
“What do you want?” Jack asked flatly, throwing the tin at his abandoned clothes and folding his arms stubbornly.
“I want a pretty picture,” John said cheerfully. “On top of him, now. I’m sure you can guess what happens if you try anything stupid. Although these days you don’t seem to be able to stop yourself.”
Jack gritted his teeth and did as he was told, putting his hands on his head at John’s gesture and gingerly straddling Ianto, who was spreadeagled naked on the bed and not looking the least bit happy about this turn of events.
In a few movements John had Jack handcuffed to Ianto, face to face. He put the key on the bedside cabinet and moved down to Jack’s feet, saying casually, “Lie down.”
Awkwardly, trying not to put his full weight on Ianto, Jack stretched out and managed not to struggle as John tied his ankles to Ianto’s with a couple of depressingly efficient knots.
“Well, wasn’t that easy?” John said brightly, and moved back up towards the head of the bed again, aiming his gun at Ianto. “Let’s make it even easier. You have a forty-eighth century tachyon converter and Jastran particle shielding somewhere in your archives. Where?”
Jack stared at him.
“You couldn’t just have rung me up and asked to borrow them?”
“Oh, come on, that’s so boring,” John pointed out. “Anyway, you’d have said no. And by the way - take, not borrow. Where are they?”
“I’m not helping you fix your Vortex Manipulator,” Jack sighed. “At least when you’re stuck on Earth I can keep something of an eye on you.”
With a deafening bang, the pillow exploded beside Ianto’s head. They both flinched, and fluff and cotton floated in the air as John adjusted his aim and calmly told them, “The key words in that sentence were ‘stuck on Earth’. A few months of life in the slow lane is a nice vacation, but any more than that and I’ll go mad. And we wouldn’t want that, would we? So I’ll ask again. Where are the shields and the converter?”
“The shields are on the second level,” Jack said flatly. “First corridor you enter, third room on your left. The filing cabinets are labelled. Even you should be able to manage that.”
“And the converter?” John said impatiently.
“Safe in my office,” Jack told him, resting his forehead against Ianto’s shoulder. “The code’s in the book in my desk.”
“Good,” John said, flicking the safety catch on his gun and holstering it quickly. “You two have fun without me. I’ll drop by some other time.”
“Always welcome,” Jack muttered against Ianto’s collarbone, and Ianto made an equally sarcastic noise of agreement.
John just laughed and climbed the ladder.
As the hatch slammed shut and locked in place, Jack started worrying at Ianto’s gag with his teeth, managing to slip it down to his neck and let Ianto gasp for breath.
“Well,” Jack said breathlessly, “he’ll be busy for a bit. While you’re here…”
“I refuse to have sex with you,” Ianto panted, glaring at him.
Jack laughed softly, then winced and shifted uncomfortably, saying, “My arms are killing me already. Will you be okay if I lie down for a few minutes?”
Ianto nodded, and Jack went limp on top of him, sighing with relief. The seconds ticked by in silence, until Jack sighed, “I’m sorry.”
“If you ever wander off and leave me handcuffed to the bed again,” Ianto said flatly, “I will kill you.”
Jack merely nodded.
“Good,” Ianto said. “Now for God’s sake get off me and get that bloody key.”
Jack picked himself up and started testing the limits of their restraints, edging towards the bedside cabinet.
“Oh, and Jack?” Ianto added, and he paused.
“You really need to lose some weight.”
:::::xxxxx:::::
The door closed behind Gwen, and Ianto turned slightly as he felt Jack’s hand on his shoulder.
“Anything urgent?” Jack asked. “Or are we done for the night?”
Leaning into his touch ever so slightly, Ianto nodded towards the computer screens and told him, “There seems to have been a spate of thefts in the last few days. UNIT have lost a Kalther chrono beacon, one of the guards at the London warehouse reported a break-in but they’re still going through the catalogue to see if anything’s been taken, Torchwood Two are missing their temporal activity locater… Look, even a couple of private collections have been targeted.”
“Huh,” Jack said, peering closely at the computers. “That’s weird. Pretty much everything you need for time travel, except it’d be suicide unshielded. And there’s no viable power source in all that. Anyway, if someone is building a time machine, they’re not going anywhere tonight. We’ll look into it tomorrow.”
“Are you sure?” Ianto asked dubiously, frowning at the list again, but both of Jack’s hands crept to his shoulders and squeezed gently.
“Mmhmm. It can wait. I had plans for tonight.”
Ianto smiled, saved his findings, and turned off the computer, letting Jack guide him out of the chair and towards his office.
“I wouldn’t want to ruin your plans,” he conceded. “Unless it’s something really urgent.”
“Trust me,” Jack muttered, lips finding the back of Ianto’s neck. “It’s nothing to worry about.”
Characters: Jack/Ianto, thief
Rating: R
Summary: “If you ever wander off and leave me handcuffed to the bed again,” Ianto said flatly, “I will kill you.”
A/N: For jantolution challenge #12, reverse format (last scene first etc.)
“So,” Ianto said at last, letting his head fall back against the pillow as Jack moved again, trying to make him more comfortable in spite of their restraints, “nothing to worry about, then?”
Jack winced, and looked again at the locked hatch of his quarters, then the black silk tying his and Ianto’s ankles together and to the bottom corners of the bed, and the multiple pairs of handcuffs securing their wrists to the top corners in a similar fashion. Beneath him, Ianto gave a small and angry growl and made a visible attempt to relax.
“I said I was sorry,” Jack repeated, holding himself up on all fours and trying to ignore the part of his mind that had to keep reminding him he had Ianto tied up naked underneath him and he wasn’t doing anything about it. “Anyway, we’ll be fine. As soon as Gwen gets here in the morning -”
Ianto groaned and thumped his head against the pillow in frustration.
“She is never going to let us forget this,” he told Jack mournfully, and Jack nodded.
“Should’ve listened to you in the first place,” he sighed.
Ianto raised both eyebrows, saying, “Oh, now you realise that?”
Jack just smiled wryly, kissed his cheek, and did his best to keep most of his weight off Ianto for as long as possible. It could have been worse.
:::::xxxxx:::::
“Again,” Jack gasped, clenching his fist to get the blood flowing properly again. “On three.”
Ianto drew in a breath and squirmed against the handcuffs and bindings again, pulling himself as close to the side of the bed as he could manage.
“One,” Jack said, moving with him, pushing the handcuffs that locked Ianto’s wrist to the headboard as far up to his palm as they’d go, and pulling the other set (which bound their wrists together) as far down Ianto’s arm as possible.
“Two,” he continued, repeating the process with Ianto’s right arm, and fixing his attention on the key so tantalisingly close on the top of the bedside cabinet.
“Three!”
In unison, they strained towards the cabinet. Jack craned his neck frantically, trying to reach the key in the middle of the top, an inch away with no more give in their restraints and Ianto struggling not to make a sound as the cuffs dug into his skin and his arms twisted painfully.
After a few more seconds Jack gave up and moved back over, sighing.
Grimacing, Ianto shook the handcuffs back down his wrists.
“Sorry,” Jack said again, resting his forehead against Ianto’s collarbone, and Ianto shook his head.
“Try again. Keep trying. Get us out of this.”
Jack nodded, picked himself up again, and looked back at the key.
“On three, then,” he said softly.
:::::xxxxx:::::
Ianto heard Jack humming happily to himself on his way back shortly before the hatch opened up again and Jack slithered down the ladder.
And then he turned and saw that Ianto wasn’t in quite the same state as he’d left him, and the grin vanished from his face.
John pressed the gun harder against Ianto’s temple and leant back against the wall, sitting on the bedside cabinet with one foot drawn up casually.
“Oops?” he suggested, and Jack looked down at the tin of syrup in his hand as if considering throwing it at John’s head.
“Put it down,” John sighed, “and do what you do best. Get on top of eye candy here.”
Ianto made a muffled noise of fury around his makeshift gag and tugged uselessly at his bonds.
“What do you want?” Jack asked flatly, throwing the tin at his abandoned clothes and folding his arms stubbornly.
“I want a pretty picture,” John said cheerfully. “On top of him, now. I’m sure you can guess what happens if you try anything stupid. Although these days you don’t seem to be able to stop yourself.”
Jack gritted his teeth and did as he was told, putting his hands on his head at John’s gesture and gingerly straddling Ianto, who was spreadeagled naked on the bed and not looking the least bit happy about this turn of events.
In a few movements John had Jack handcuffed to Ianto, face to face. He put the key on the bedside cabinet and moved down to Jack’s feet, saying casually, “Lie down.”
Awkwardly, trying not to put his full weight on Ianto, Jack stretched out and managed not to struggle as John tied his ankles to Ianto’s with a couple of depressingly efficient knots.
“Well, wasn’t that easy?” John said brightly, and moved back up towards the head of the bed again, aiming his gun at Ianto. “Let’s make it even easier. You have a forty-eighth century tachyon converter and Jastran particle shielding somewhere in your archives. Where?”
Jack stared at him.
“You couldn’t just have rung me up and asked to borrow them?”
“Oh, come on, that’s so boring,” John pointed out. “Anyway, you’d have said no. And by the way - take, not borrow. Where are they?”
“I’m not helping you fix your Vortex Manipulator,” Jack sighed. “At least when you’re stuck on Earth I can keep something of an eye on you.”
With a deafening bang, the pillow exploded beside Ianto’s head. They both flinched, and fluff and cotton floated in the air as John adjusted his aim and calmly told them, “The key words in that sentence were ‘stuck on Earth’. A few months of life in the slow lane is a nice vacation, but any more than that and I’ll go mad. And we wouldn’t want that, would we? So I’ll ask again. Where are the shields and the converter?”
“The shields are on the second level,” Jack said flatly. “First corridor you enter, third room on your left. The filing cabinets are labelled. Even you should be able to manage that.”
“And the converter?” John said impatiently.
“Safe in my office,” Jack told him, resting his forehead against Ianto’s shoulder. “The code’s in the book in my desk.”
“Good,” John said, flicking the safety catch on his gun and holstering it quickly. “You two have fun without me. I’ll drop by some other time.”
“Always welcome,” Jack muttered against Ianto’s collarbone, and Ianto made an equally sarcastic noise of agreement.
John just laughed and climbed the ladder.
As the hatch slammed shut and locked in place, Jack started worrying at Ianto’s gag with his teeth, managing to slip it down to his neck and let Ianto gasp for breath.
“Well,” Jack said breathlessly, “he’ll be busy for a bit. While you’re here…”
“I refuse to have sex with you,” Ianto panted, glaring at him.
Jack laughed softly, then winced and shifted uncomfortably, saying, “My arms are killing me already. Will you be okay if I lie down for a few minutes?”
Ianto nodded, and Jack went limp on top of him, sighing with relief. The seconds ticked by in silence, until Jack sighed, “I’m sorry.”
“If you ever wander off and leave me handcuffed to the bed again,” Ianto said flatly, “I will kill you.”
Jack merely nodded.
“Good,” Ianto said. “Now for God’s sake get off me and get that bloody key.”
Jack picked himself up and started testing the limits of their restraints, edging towards the bedside cabinet.
“Oh, and Jack?” Ianto added, and he paused.
“You really need to lose some weight.”
:::::xxxxx:::::
The door closed behind Gwen, and Ianto turned slightly as he felt Jack’s hand on his shoulder.
“Anything urgent?” Jack asked. “Or are we done for the night?”
Leaning into his touch ever so slightly, Ianto nodded towards the computer screens and told him, “There seems to have been a spate of thefts in the last few days. UNIT have lost a Kalther chrono beacon, one of the guards at the London warehouse reported a break-in but they’re still going through the catalogue to see if anything’s been taken, Torchwood Two are missing their temporal activity locater… Look, even a couple of private collections have been targeted.”
“Huh,” Jack said, peering closely at the computers. “That’s weird. Pretty much everything you need for time travel, except it’d be suicide unshielded. And there’s no viable power source in all that. Anyway, if someone is building a time machine, they’re not going anywhere tonight. We’ll look into it tomorrow.”
“Are you sure?” Ianto asked dubiously, frowning at the list again, but both of Jack’s hands crept to his shoulders and squeezed gently.
“Mmhmm. It can wait. I had plans for tonight.”
Ianto smiled, saved his findings, and turned off the computer, letting Jack guide him out of the chair and towards his office.
“I wouldn’t want to ruin your plans,” he conceded. “Unless it’s something really urgent.”
“Trust me,” Jack muttered, lips finding the back of Ianto’s neck. “It’s nothing to worry about.”