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[snrarft]

Things don't seem real. I'll be the first to point out that sounds very hippy, but it's true. I noticed this when a couple of friends and I went ate at a chinese place north on High street. Our semblance of a group of friends seemed very forced; it was the first time we'd all hung out together in a week or so, and the only things people were saying

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Knowlege of the ages my friend......

[yuubinkyoku]

I mean it's a good way to not get hurt but a bad way to live. I guess I figure I might as well get my hopes up since maybe just maybe something good will happen. Chances are nothing good will happen. Something bad will almost certinally happen but hey, I'm down all the time anyway so whats to loose with having high hopes.

As for the strain on the group of friends I know what you are talking about. Last year it was Ren, Lisa, Matthew, and I thought it all. We were a hardcore group that stuck together and kept everyone else out. Over the summer however we picked up Tom and I picked up a girl for a short time. Ren hated her and she hated Ren. Naturally I was so intoxicated with the girl that I took her side over Rens. Long story short this year I fell off the friend wagon for a bit. It was my own choice. Now that I am out of the immediate group I can still hang out with them from time to time and not feel odd but the remainder I don't have to worry about them. There is more to the story but I think this makes the basic point.