Into You : Chapter 27
Chapter 27: Real Feelings
“Kame chan, are you sure you want to pick up Tatsuya at work?” Koki asked
“Yes. Why?”
“But you know…” the bald man hesitate for a while “there’s a big possibility that you’ll run into Jin there.”
Sadness momentarily flickered into Kazuya’s face but it immediately disappears.
“I know, but don’t worry Koki kun, I’m over him. It’s been like what? 10 years? Ha-ha!”
After which he hugged his older friend as if to assure him that everything’s alright.
“Thank you for your concern, but really I’m fine. I’m going ok!”
“Alright… Just make sure to call if you need someone to pick you up.”
“Ok, I will” then Kazuya grab his bag and ran outside.
“Really Kame chan, you should have seen your face when I mention Jin’s name” Koki muttered to himself.
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“Because now that Kamenashi san is no longer in the picture, Akanishi san can love you back!”
Silence filled the room as everyone focused their gaze at Tatsuya and Takeru, while the older one glares at his brother.
“What did you just say?”
“Tatchan, now you can be happy with Akanishi kun.”
“Happy with Jin? What made you think I'll be happy with him?”
“I do anything to make you happy.”
“You’re not answering my question.” Tatsuya grabbed his brother and starts shaking him, hard. Ryo immediately approach them when he saw Takeru wincing in pain.
“Stop, you’re hurting your brother.”
Hearing this, the man his reprimanding face him and uttered “that's good to hear!”
“Tatsuya, please… Just let him go.”
Then Ryo carefully remove Tatsuya’s hand so the latter hesitantly drops it on his side and stares intently at the boy in front of him. "Explain yourself."
“I’m… I’m doing this be…because I love Tat chan” Takeru stuttered
“We know you love him, he’s you’re brother.” Ryo patiently replied
“No… it’s not… not… that….”
Ryo look at him for a long time trying to grasp the meaning behind the words when finally realization hits him.
“Oh God, don’t tell me that you….”
Takeru fidget from where he stands avoiding everyone’s eyes most especially Tatsuya.
“I love him. I love him so much and I want him to be happy, even though I know I'm not the one who can give him that happiness.”
“But why didn't you try saying it? I mean, it would have been easier if you just tell him face to face.”
These words made the young man glares at Ryo “Easy for you to say coz you’re not in my shoes. You don’t know how I feel.”
His patience is running out and he can feel it “Assuming that I don’t, at least I don’t go around doing crazy stuff and hurting other people just to show my love for someone. Takeru this is not a child’s play coz real people and real feelings are involved. So now I want a direct confession from you. And don't give me some smartass comeback. You’re the person in this picture right?” Then Ryo held out the snap shot of the kiss.
But instead of Takeru, Koji answered for him.
“Yes, that’s us. I’m so sorry Tatsuya san. We didn’t know it will turn out this way. But please don’t be mad at Take chan, he just did what he think is the best for you.”
“What’s best for me?! Well, let me tell you what’s best for me, STAY OUT OF MY LIFE!”
Takeru turn pale when he heard what his brother just said. 'Tat chan don't hate me please.'
“Tat chan…” he started to say, but Jin’s voice made him stop.
“YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!! THE ONES IN THE PICTURE.... THEY ARE NOT TATSUYA AND KAZUYA?!” He looks at his friends and when Ryo nod in confirmation, Jin felt like he's been jab hard right into his guts.
He glared at Tatsuya's younger brother and about to launch at him to give him a hard punch if it's not for Toma who tried his best to hold him in place.
"You little... Son of a... let go Toma! You... you ruin everything!"
"Jin, Jin... Please stop he's just a kid!"
But the other one continue to struggle in order to break free.
"He's not a kid! He's a devil in disguise! No kid can do that. YOU'RE THE WORST! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!"
Suddenly Jin stop fighting Toma's hold and stood limply.
“I can't believe this... If this is a joke? It's not funny... Everything… Everything I believe in…It’s all a lie. Everything's a lie and I lose Kazuya...” he whispered
“Jin…” Tomohisa heard what his best friend just said step closer and try to put his arms around his shoulder to say that it’s alright, but after detaching himself from Toma's hold, Jin took a step back as if avoiding any contact. So he decided to let him be.
So instead he turns his attention back to the people in front of them.
“Takeru kun, tell me how did you manage to pull a stunt like that?”
The boy in question, look up and meet Tomohisa’s gaze.
“It’s a mere coincidence… The day Kamenashi san went to Tat chan’s place, I was also there. The picture of them hugging was real. But the rest... It's us... But seeing them like that or more specificically my brother hugging him gave me an idea.”
“Idea? What idea?”
“A plan that will make Akanishi kun leave Kamenashi san so that my brother will have a chance. So Akanshi kun will finally look his way.”
“What made you think that Tat chan wants that?”
“I… I saw a piece of paper tuck between his lyrics pad saying ‘I wish he’ll look my way. For such a long time my only happines is to gaze at him from afar.’ So I assumed that it’s for Akanishi kun.”
“YOU’RE SNOOPING AT MY THINGS!”
“I’m not, I accidentally saw it. I didn’t mean to pry on your stuff.”
“Alright, alright! Let’s settle this matter once and for all. I won’t believe anything else, whatever they say it means nothing to me, not unless you confirm it yourself. So Tat chan, we want to know the truth. Do you really love Jin or not?”
Tatsuya look at his band mates, at Koji and then look his brother straight in the eyes.
“Someone told me, that in life you don’t always get what you wanted. And I would like to tell that person that I know how it feels…. For there’s someone I really wish for in this entire world but I know I can’t have.”
Then he remembered his conversation with Kazuya at the amusement park.
“It’s alright Kame chan cry as much as you want. Maybe it’s my entire fault that you’re hurting like this. I admit, before I was really mad thinking that you should have chose me instead of Jin but at the same time I was glad you didn’t.”
This statement caught the young man’s attention. As his teary eyes gazed at the other he asked “What do you mean Tat chan?”
Sighing Tatsuya replied “Guess I owe you an explanation too.”
Kazuya stay quite so that Tatsuya can continue with what he’s about to say.
“Honestly, my feelings are like complicated and tangled web. I loved you, I think I do but truth of the matter is, there was a time when I thought I fallen in love with Jin too or I think I did.”
And not letting the younger one to cut him, he immediately added
“Who wouldn’t right? He’s sweet in his own little way. But I think you’ve surpass that or I think you did, that’s why after you decided to stop dating me I intend to tear you and Jin apart and have you for myself."
“So why didn’t you?”
“Before, when I said that I love you, it’s like 50 - 50. Half of me say that ‘yes, I love Kame chan’ but the other half says ‘is this feeling really for him?’"
“Oh, so you mean to say you’re not sure with what you really feel about me. I thought you’re 100 % sincere when you said that before” The young man smiled.
“I’m sorry... I guess at that time, more than being heart broken, my pride is greatly wounded coz again I cannot have what I wanted. You know, someone told me, that in life you don’t always get what you wanted. Maybe it’s true…”
Kazuya cast him a glance before asking “Why, is there something you really want?”
“No. But there is someone I really wish for in this entire world but I know I can never have.”
“How can you be so sure? If you just take a step towards that someone, maybe....”
Tatsuya let his eyes wander at the beautiful scenery before them.
“Kame chan, I try to run away. I thought I made a progress but sadly I found out that I’m only running in circles, that no matter what I do or where I go, I always hear my heart calling out that person’s name.”
“Can’t you go back and try to reach for that person’s hand? Who knows, that person might just be waiting for you?”
“That person is within reach, but because I’m scared, scared of this foreign feeling, I decided to distance myself only to realize that we’ve already drifted apart, very far apart.”
“I’m sorry it didn’t work out between the two of us. Before, I really thought that I love you. But I didn’t expect that Jin can change the way I feel about you.”
“Don’t be sorry alright, coz right from the beginning, I know that you and Jin really fit together. I’m not blind; since I started dating you I have this notion that in the end, Jin will win your heart.
“Tat chan…”
“I’m being sentimental right? Is this new to you? But I have to say it somehow. Keeping it inside my chest is really troublesome. And I’m glad I was able to share this intimate secret with you.”
And for the first time, he saw Kazuya flash his most sincere smile.
“So… The person you’re in love with… who is it???
“The person I’m in love with?” Tatsuya look at his friend and gave him a heartbreaking smile.
When the flashback of their conversation was over, Tatsuya take a deep breath open his mouth to speak.
“Takeru, honestly I’m so disappointed at you. If you wanna know the truth then I’ll tell you the truth. I like Jin before yes. I like Kame chan, yes. And up until now I still do. But I’m not in love with them."
"I’m sorry. I didn’t know you feel this way for me. I love you and you know that. But I can never love you more than as a brother coz my heart already belongs to someone else.”
At that exact moment someone open the door and stepped inside Boice Club Dressing room
“Excuse me, Pi I’m looking for Tat ~ ~ ~”
But his words were cut short when someone clamps a hand on his mouth and at the same time a faint ‘click’ was heard indicating the door has been locked.
“Shhh Kazuya …Tatsuya is busy right now” a voice whispered in his ears.
‘Jin?’
“And that person is… Is…. That person is…”
Tatsuya tightly shut his eyes to block away the stares coming from the people inside their room and at the same time stop the erratic beating of his heart, then out of the blue he recalled Kazuya’s exact words.
‘Tat chan, there’s nothing wrong if you let the person you love know what you really feel about them. If they laugh at you because you’re being true to yourself then that’s their problem. As long as you’re not stepping on anyone, I guess there's nothing to be ashamed of.’
‘It’s now or never!’
“That person is Ryo!”
When these words escape his lips he suddenly scamper out of the room pushing his band mates out of the way and not even noticing Kazuya standing near the door.
Ear-splitting silence immediately engulfs the room, each one of them was shocked with Tatsuya's revelation and the only sound that breaks the stillness is when a mobile phone was unconsciously drop on the floor by Nishikido Ryo.
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A/N: I'm sorry.. No double update for now... I need to meet my deadlines before Christmas vacation comes so I can only write 1 chapter... And please don't kill me if this chapter is so boring ... (T____T)
As always, comments are very much love and appreciated! (^___^)V