Concerning my good-for-nothing father
FUCK! My dad is such an ego-centric asshole! The only way you can hold a normal conversation with him is to swallow your pride completely and stay utterly silent. That's right. Just sit on the phone line while he goes into his monologue. If you do say something wait until he's been silent for over 30 seconds. If not, he will interrupt you by saying that you interrupted him. If you try to say something he will interrupt you anyway, so what's the use of talking? Make sure to say nothing even remotely offensive and make sure you say things at the right pitch and volume so that he doesn't suddenly interpret it, in his chauvanistic mind, to have any tinge of argumentativeness in it. In fact just don't call him at all. Never talk to him, cut him out of your life and never set eyes on the European Fuck-head again.
Yeah right. I'm too materialistic. I wish I could just one day, take out a whole bunch of loans for college, cancel my phone service, and change all my communication numbers and addresses, and then fucking take a knife and carve him completely out of my life.
Dear Father,
Fuck you, Mr. power-trip!!!! I'll never be the fucking daughter that you want me to! I'll never be a size 0 or get into Harvard or have the material capacity of a monk. I'll never say or do things exactly the way you want them to! Is that even possible, for Fuck's sake? I mean, in your world, you're the Dalai Lama, god damn you! You know exactly what I mean when I say "I'm sorry" on the phone with too much of a stacatto. That definitely means that I take you for granted and don't really mean I'm sorry and deep down, the way I'm saying "I'm sorry" tells you that I'm a stuck-up, spoiled bitch of a child that only loves you for your money. Well, the last part's true. I'm stuck up, I am a bitch, and I'm only acting like I like you for your money. There was one miniscule point in time where I thought I was actually grateful for the hell you've put me through, but now I think I must have been dilusional. Fuck! What should I do? I never want to speak to you again! I never want to see your face and I'd rather not think about you ever for as long as I live! How do you con woman into thinking you're attractive and kind? You fucking conned my mom and then made ten years of her life a living hell! I wish I could fucking teach you a lesson to show you that you're pushing everyone that you supposedly "love", or more like need the attention from, away! I wish I could tell this to your face, wish I could scream it to you, wish I could get the satisfaction of understanding what you feel when your only child fucking tells you that she never wants to fucking see you again!
Your cunt of a daughter,
Sofie (why didn't you put a "ph" in my first name instead of an "f", freak? It may be Serbian to spell it that way, but no one ever spells my name right thanks to you!)
Goodbye money, goodbye Korea. I fucking hate my dad, I seriously do. In fact, I don't think I felt anything over a severe dislike for him. The only things he's given me are material possessions (with a catch), hairy eyebrows, and detrimentally low self esteem. Thank you, dad! Those are great gifts for my future!
Needless to say, we may have to split gas prices to Canada after all, my lovers. That, and I may not be able to afford going to Korea with you, Dah-Yeon (after he so galliantly threatened me by retracting his frequent flyer miles). I mean, what the FUCK! He makes 150 grand a year! The least he could do was give his daughter the money that she deserves for having to live through his shit!
I've been hysterical for an hour now, ever since he hung up on me after yelling that I took him for granted. All I want to do is cut him out of my life. I don't care if I'm a starving bohemian artist four years from now, I just can't take it anymore...