An Idiot.

[sobitxx]

Title: An Idiot
Summary: The girl is smart, the girl is wise, the girl's meeting her utter demise.
Characters: The girl & the boy.
Genre: Angst/General.
Rating/Warnings: G/Confusing?
Word count: 531
Author's Note: Written for brigits_flame September Main Contest. & just because I haven't written in such a long time.

Comments

[oryginal_skin]

I enjoy the figurative language you've used here... you have a unique voice that comes out in your paragraph and sentence structure -- especially in the second paragraph, with your turns of phrase. You like to write a sentence, and then turn it on its head with the next one.

I think that you tried to tell too much here with too little, though. You had such a big story, with so many facets, and this beautiful story is forced into very little. I find myself wishing for more, so I can hear the intimate details of your piece.

[kathiann]

This is a very well done story, and so true to the feelings. Who hasn't been the girl, fawning over a make believe love?

[mermaidbia]

Hullo, the name's Bia, and I'm one of your editors this week

[sobitxx]

flattery! >///<

thank you for the edits! :]