Missing the Key

[sobitxx]

Title: Missing the Key
Summary: Death is unforgiving.
Characters: She & he.
Genre: Angst/General.
Rating/Warnings: G/Depressing; mention of bleach-drinking, gun-shooting, and drunk driving.
Word count: 345
Author's Note: Written for brigits_flame September Main Contest (Second week). I am an angsty, angsty soul.

Comments

[keppiehed]

Ooh, angst looks good on you. Love the last lines, they are the perfect ending to the rumination of the narrator. Wow! That was one that I will be thinking about, long after. Well done!

[sobitxx]

Thank you! :]

[aquarius_galuxy]

I really like the repetition of "how does it open" you've used! It gives the piece a rhythm that keeps me reading on. I like how you've used the character's physical features to describe his/her personality, too. It makes me wonder about the dead character, and his/her relationship with the narrator. =o

Thanks for the read!

[sobitxx]

Thank you! :]

[aquarius_galuxy]

you're welcome! =D

[sobitxx]

That's good, since I love writing angst. >o< Thank you!

brigits_flame Editor Post

[thaneofcawdor]

Hello :) I have feedback to give you from my editing spree. Would you like my comments here or would you like them privately messaged to you? There's nothing negative in my comments, it's all quite positive! I'll leave the decision up to you, however.

Re: brigits_flame Editor Post

[sobitxx]

On my journal would be fine. Thanks! :]

Re: brigits_flame Editor Post

[thaneofcawdor]

Here goes

Re: brigits_flame Editor Post

[sobitxx]

Thank you!! :] for the edit & nice words, haha