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[socaldummy]

It makes me sad that I've never felt that somebody needed me, even for a brief moment, in order to survive.

For example, it makes me sad that I have never changed a baby's diapers.

It also makes me sad that I have never broken down bawling in tears hugging a close friend. Or a close friend to me.

Comments

[jdean_81]

People tend not to express their feelings as much as they could. But chances are, someone has needed you and you've made a difference in their lives

[socaldummy]

Wow. I'm really not sure what to say.

I think we obviously have a lot in common -- both of us are pretty guarded in a lot of ways and like to be in control (more than we probably should) rather than leaving ourselves vulnerable in some ways. Part of me is more open online than I am in person, but in person in some ways I'm way more open than online. I hide my identity online not from my friends, but only from people I don't know who might randomly stumble across my journal. Obviously, you do so somewhat differently. I do think that you're a lot more open than you give yourself credit for. And I also know that most of your concerns you expressed above are not really things that you need to worry about you. The people who care about you will do so regardless.

[jdean_81]

Sure I may be 'open' about certain things, but some people tend to want to know more. And some things I think it shouldn't matter for them to know cause it shouldn't make a difference. But what if it DOES make a difference. I'm just not too good with people being disappointed in me for things that I can't control. ...that seems weird to say.

I guess we really do have a lot in common.

[slavetopassion]

Being safe has its pluses but then you miss all those wonderful experiences, like having baby poop on your fingers or hurting as much as a friend as they cry in your arms.
You have protected yourself so well that you may be protecting yourself from life. Get out there! Feel it!

~smooches~

[socaldummy]

I know, you're right.

[socaldummy]

thank god. and i sure as hell hope that you don't want to either!

[socaldummy]

scat?

[boywondermark]

As another person who wears armor...take my advice and strip it off every once in awhile! You are a really sweet guy who has alot to offer someone...if you weren't, you sure wouldn't be worried about crying with a friend or poopy diapers! ~hug~

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[axenfg]

Ok, well the friends part of my LJ is called the INNER CIRCLE. When you see my entreis, there are 2, one with a IC in the front of the tittle, the other has nothing. the IC is for teh inner circle group, which has unedited material. SO have fun reading the REAL material... =-D