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[motivatedbyhate]

I guess this could be considered a formal introduction.. though I already feel like I know most of you. I lurk around the community from time to time. It's truly a relief to read the posts here.. to know I'm not the only one who suffers with this. I've always felt like I belonged in the shadows of life, invisible to the living. Over time I became

Comments

[addamweishaupt]

I can totally relate to what you're going through. I don't know how to overcome such struggle because I'm in it too and I'm only 23 years old. your words explain what I fail to express when I try to speak up about my feelings but never find the words. I hope things change for the better for you. There must be a way out of suffering and we are all going to find it one day. the day you lead the life you've always wanted shall come and this hardship will only make a better person out of you.

peace

[motivatedbyhate]

Thank you for the support, it means a lot. Hope things get better for you too, keep your head up!

[dodgy_mermaid]

Good to see you; thanks for sharing. I understand that sense of relief. When I discovered this group, I was shocked that so many people experience life as I do.

I have always been an introvert, too, but you know--there's a point at which it becomes something else; something unhealthy. I never really fit in, either, even though I was vocally, cheerfully interested in learning and interaction. It seemed like that eagerness was wrong, so I retreated, and that's how I remained. You do, indeed, create a frail little world of your own when you feel unwelcome in this one.

There is a way out, but building confidence is similar to building muscle because it is uncomfortable, you sweat, and you're left sore and tired--but you have to persist if you want to improve yourself.

I sort of just came up with that because I've wanted to get in shape physically as well as otherwise. It is a rather reasonable comparison, if silly. XD

Cheers to getting better.

[jamie_patrick]

(dodgy_mermaid -I really like the analogy.)

There's definitely a way out--work those confidence muscles.

Some things I have done in the past: (1) Go out where you know you don't know anyone and force yourself to say hi to (almost) everyone--I put the almost in there depending on how busy the place is. Also, pick a place where it's normal to say hello to people--like a park.

(2) Start a conversation with a sales person every time you make a transaction--the weather, her hair, the shirt, what does that tattoo mean--anything.

So, there are a couple things to get you started. If you find yourself opening your mouth more often to actual people, you'll feel more confident.

[dodgy_mermaid]

I second this advice. While I am one of the (lucky?) few sociophobes with fewer issues regarding strangers, this method has definitely helped me build confidence. Building a rapport with local shop owners is especially rewarding. :D

[glass5ky]

First I want to say I am sorry for what you've gone through with living with anxiety. It really is the worst. Second I want to mention that a big part of anxiety is allowing yourself to sink into negative thinking patterns

[motivatedbyhate]

Thank you for your post.. I really appreciate it. Unlike some depressed people, I don't take offense to positive advice. I try to uplift their spirits when I'm in a good space.