Criminal Minds: Trompe L'oeil (part 8)

[sodakey]

~ (part eight) ~

The scrubs are navy blue. New. The young man wearing them can't be much older than Reid. A group of hospital workers are already surrounding him-shoving at the metal table toppled near his head and patting at his face. A young woman with scrubs just a slightly paler shade is standing white-faced against the wall, covering her mouth

Comments

[daylyn]

Ooh... so tense! And they're all being targeted and played... that's got to piss them off royally, actually. Well done. I really liked the tension of the scene, the tension between Reid and Hotch, and just the overall theme. I'm still very intrigued and looking forward to more.

[sodakey]

Thank you. :) We're getting closer.

Pleased the tension worked, and I really very much appreciate your feedback.

[sodakey]

Also... have I mentioned that I like your icon? Makes me laugh.

[lalla32]

I'm not always leaving a comment but I'm always reading. I must tell you, this is frustrating! Very very frustrating! These chapters are towo short! :( I need more. I know that when this story is over I'll have to reread everything again to be able to really apreciate it in all its beauty and tension and energy.

But I declare myself a mad fan of Hotch/Reid scenes. Loved this one... loved how Reid was silent during the discussion going on over his bed and how suddendly he just asked for his bag. And Hotch in perfect "daddy" mode... so much love!!!

"Yes, sir."

Thank you!

[sodakey]

That's okay. I love any comment you have time to leave. ;) Seriously, I appreciate the feedback. I understand the frustration with the smaller chapters. Thus is the budding life of a work in progress, lol.

I'm really pleased the Hotch and Reid dynamic is working. I enjoy writing it.

:)

[lilmoonbunny16]

This is just full of AWESOME!!! *hugs* I was so excited to see an update! I thought the tension in the room was really poignant, I could just about feel the stress that everyone was feeling, especially when Reid broke in asking about his to go bag. Very nice chapter! I can't wait for more =D

[sodakey]

Yay, I'm so glad. :) Glad the tension in the room worked!

Thanks for the feedback. Good to hear what readers are thinking. Love it.

[jerico_cacaw]

Oooooh, I like how you describe the scene Hotch finds via the characters' explanations instead of showing it to us. It works well because it is Prentiss' POV, and she wasn't present when they found the commotion source. It drags the tension a little longer (as does her headache -- I wonder if it means something), and allows for a nice way to include the extra bad news

[sodakey]

Thank you. I'm really pleased that worked.

As for Hotch, I see him as pretty much the perfect profiler. And as Reid has said on the show, Hotch is not a blinker, yet I wanted to portray in some subtle way that all of this is getting to him (what happened to Reid, the team being targeted, the shadow of Gideon, lack of sleep, etc. etc.). A brief grasping-at-straws moment felt like the best way to do it. And yeah, to have the team stand up to him in a way, but in a way that showed they trusted him and understood where he was at, and why he was suggesting what he was suggesting, and just giving him his moment to come back around.

Hope it worked. ;)

[water_soter]

Damn, for the life of me I can't remember the reference. What episode was that? Another great chappie!!! You managed to convey the sense of urgency and frustration. I'm more intrigued about what's going on than ever. Your Prentiss is one of the best characterizations I have ever read. That little scene with Hotch and Reid butting heads was also so well written. And that little moment with Morgan and Reid in that final scene was so sweet and so *them*. Loved it, loved it, loved! Also I really enjoy the sense of team and their protectiveness of Reid by practically being on the same surface with him. Even Rossi who was so relunctant to let anyone in at the beginning but now he's like the uncle to our little gang.

[sodakey]

The reference is to Elephant's Memory. :)

Really glad the urgency came through and very pleased you feel the Prentiss voice seems true to form!

[water_soter]

Huh, I didn't even remember this episode. I had thought you might had refered to the episode when Hotch kicks Reid to help him get the gun at his ankle. But that was season 1 I believe and Emily didn't join the team until midway season two.

I think all the characters of the show are difficult to write in their own way. Despite the show not being character focused, their characters are very well written and developed throughout the series. I rarily see this kind of show have characters so well, in character throughout the series. It's funny that in series that are character focused can't manage that.

Oh and wouldn't it be awesome if we saw that coin again? I don't know why, but it seems so important for his character for some reason. Sigh, I want to seethe coin! *pouts* I don't know what's with me and the coin but I must see it!! :-P

[sodakey]

His sobriety coin? Yeah, that might be nice to see again. :)