Somehow You See (the Wonder in Me)
Title: Somehow you see (the wonder in me).
Author: la_fours a.k.a. Tonya.
For: skoosiepants
Pairing: Mike/Kevin
Main Characters: Kevin Jonas, Mike Carden, Joe Jonas, Bill Beckett, Zac Efron
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 9k
Disclaimer: I own nothing at all, cause if I did Kevin Jonas and Mike Carden would be living in a bungalow on Fire Island.
Summary: High school/College AU. Mike and Kevin falling in love, Zac Efron being a bad apple, Bill/Joe tomfoolery.
Notes: This is my first JoBros/TAI/Bandslash fic evah! It's also the biggest one shot I've ever written so please be kind (Think of the children! Won't somebody think of the children!) This is for our super mod skoosiepants, which made me even MORE nervous. I really hope you like it Skoosie!
Prompt: A first-time fic, misunderstandings would be awesome, but with a happy ending. Can be canon-ish, AU, or JONAS-like
Dating Zac was good, probably even better than good. But since he was the first guy Kevin ever dated, he wasn't quite sure. He had liked Zac ever since he knew what it was to like someone. Even before he realized he was gay, he just always liked Zac. So when Zac had asked him to be his boyfriend in senior year, he obviously said yes. Well actually, the first thing he said was "Huh-wha?", but the second thing he said was a goofy, emphatic yes.
You see, Kevin wasn't one of the cool kids in high school. He was smart and sweet and the older brother of cool kids and for him that was enough. He even found his place in the murky waters of high school hierarchy by remaining on the fringes of cool. He may not have been on the football/basketball/soccer teams, but he was the best equipment manager around. He may not have run the student council, but he volunteered for almost any and every committee they had to offer. And even though he wasn't particularly hip or popular, he was the older and wiser brother to Hollywood High School's most well known siblings since Liam and Noel graduated back in the 90's. Half the reason anyone even cared who Kevin was was because of his little brothers, Joe and Nick. While Kevin was just happy to graduate high school unscathed, his kid brothers had an entirely different take on the high school experience. Nick spent his time overachieving to the fullest as co-captain of several sporting teams as well as Vice-President of the student council. The only person outranking him was one Zac Efron. And while Nick spent his time trying to out-do the most everything guy in school Joe kept himself busy...well, trying to look busy. It wasn't enough for him to be the "school clown" (class clown being far too small time for him), he also went out of his way to charm the entire faculty into overlooking his various absences and shenanigans. Joe made the female teachers feel special and the male teachers feel cool, and somehow that was enough to get him by.
But Kevin was comfortable with his low profile, being the voice of reason and occasional referee keeping his brothers in line. He could only imagine what next year would be like after he left and his brothers were finally able to run the whole show.
But the anonymity disappeared the minute he became "the guy Zac Efron is dating". At first he shied away from the attention, yearning to keep his private life private, but that was a foolish request considering he was dating the HBIC of Hollywood High. So he smiled his best fake smile and promised himself he would get used to it.
~
"Kevin you can't really be serious about this virgin thing can you?"
It wasn't the first time that Zac had questioned Kevin's decision to keep his virginity intact, and it probably wasn't going to be the last. He wasn't really in the mood to argue about how it started out as something he did because his parents asked him too, but eventually became something he believed him himself. He had already explained that it wasn't necessarily about waiting until marriage, but about feeling absolutely one hundred percent secure with himself and his relationship. So he just sighed loud enough to let Zac know that this conversation would lead to nothing but headaches and headaches were not really what sexytimes were made of.
"I don't mean to push Kevin, but we've been together for what? Three months now? And nothing. You know your brothers just wear their rings for show right? I'm even pretty sure that Frankie has been playing doctor with Miley's little sister for at least a year."
Kevin rolled his eyes and tried to convince himself that the reason Zac was so pushy was because he loved him. Not that Zac had told him as much, but that had to be the reason, right?
"I'm just not ready yet Zac" Kevin finally replied. "I just want to make sure that it's right, and that I'm really ready. Can't you understand that?"
Zac just shifted away from Kevin on the couch saying, "I just don't know Kev, it's easy for a guy to get the wrong impression, like you're not really into me or something. I just need some reassurance is all."
Not wanting to antagonize Zac anymore than he already had, Kevin shimmied closer on the couch and proceeded to give Zac the best handjob he knew how. In hindsight it probably wasn't very good, but it seemed to keep Zac satisfied for now, and left Kevin feeling like he at least hadn't completely compromised everything he believed in.
~
The last month before graduation came and went in a flurry of excitement. Things with Zac had been going pretty great and he had even stopped bugging Kevin about sex so much. And now to thank him for his devotion and patience Kevin decided that prom night would be the night he finally gave in and lost his virginity to Zac. It only seemed right, as they were headed to college together in the fall and Kevin longed to fit in and be a mature, sex-having college freshman. He and Zac hadn't planned on rooming together, but he knew with the two of them living away from home they would make the best of their situation. Yup, after the prom Kevin Jonas would no longer be a virgin, and he could also be proud that he waited for the right guy.
The actual prom was a blur between the running around Kevin had to do for prom committee and the fluttering the butterflies were doing in his stomach. As far as he could recall the night went something like soggy chicken, over-cooked vegetables, Zac and Selena; king and queen, William Beckett and his crew getting kicked out for smoking, drinking and the fact that half of them graduated last year, and before he knew it the DJ was playing the last song of the night and sadly Zac was no where to be found. But if Kevin was anything, he was optimistic, and having the whole night alone with Zac would be a million times better that the silly little last dance at the prom. So he ducked out early and made sure that the room he had rented had everything they needed. Kevin had almost had a stroke buying all the necessities at the drug store, but tonight would more than make up for it. He lit a few candles and took one last look at himself straightening out his rumpled tux before he went back downstairs to find Zac. Everything would be different after tonight, he could just feel it.
As the senior class filled out of the ballroom and into the lobby Kevin still couldn't find Zac. Though he was lucky enough to find Zac's best friend Corbin.
"Uh-hey man, have you seen Zac around?" Kevin managed to ask while somehow keeping his cool. He didn't want to let on as to why he was in such a hurry to find his boyfriend.
"Not lately, Kev, but we were talking about checking out all the different after parties so my best guess is that he'd be up in my room changing out of his suit. Take my room key, cause he might be in the shower or something." Kevin's cheeks flushed a deep red at the thought of Zac in the shower, so he took the key card from Corbin and quickly thanked him as he headed upstairs.
When he got to the room, Kevin thought of just opening the door to greet Zac in whatever state if undress he may have been in. But Kevin was raised better than that and instead decided to knock. He was nothing if not a gentleman.
"Coming"
The voice on other side of the door didn't sound like Zac, but Kevin just figured it was Lucas or one of their other friends. Instead he was met with a very wet, nearly naked Pete Wentz. Thank God for towels.
"Umm...Kevin right?" Pete asked as he started to fidget uncomfortably in front of the door. "What are you doing here?"
"I-uh, I was looking for Zac, have you seen him? I'm sorry to interrupt, I probably just have the wrong room."
Then Kevin heard a voice that was so familiar he knew he had the right room.
"Who is it babe? Room service here?" And as he came out of the bathroom equally wet and towel clad as Pete it finally dawned on Kevin what was actually happening.
"Oh my God, Zac...what, I mean, why? I mean, oh my God!" In Kevin's headed that sounded way more eloquent than his mouth permitted, but the point was clear.
"Oh Jesus, Pete pass me that robe" Just hearing Zac say Pete's name filled him with so much everything. Disgust, hatred and most of all shame. Shame that he was going to break his vow for someone like Zac Efron.
In the hallway, Kevin proceeded to pace back and forth trying to get his thoughts in order.
"Kev? Um, I don't know what to say."
"How about you start with what the hell you were doing naked and wet with Pete Wentz? Actually scratch that, I can figure that one out myself. But...why?"
Zac eyes flashed a look that could either be read as guilt or pity, Kevin couldn't tell which and wasn't even sure that he wanted to.
"Man, Kev. I'm 18 years old. How long did you expect me to wait? Did you really think that some making out and a few shy hand jobs were going to tide me over forever? How long did you actually expect me to wait?"
Kevin winced at Zac's flippant discription of their intimate moments and he could tell in Zac's heart of hearts he felt he had done nothing wrong. That it was all Kevin's fault that this had happened. So he answered honestly, hoping to regain some dignity.
"Honestly, I had hoped that you would wait until tonight." And with that he gave him Corbin's key and walked away head held high.
I will not cry, I will not cry, I will not cry.
When he made it back to his own hotel room, he laid on the bed not bothering to take off his suit or even blow out the candles. And then he cried.
~
"Kev c'monnnn, you've been lying in bed for half the damn summer, and it's really getting in the way of our pre-college brotherly bonding!"
Along with nails on a chalkboard and the constant drip of a leaky faucet, the high-pitched whine of Joe Jonas was possibly the most annoying sound Kevin at ever heard. But after four weeks of wallowing, it finally got him out of bed and back into the real world.
Kevin wanted to ignore Joe's constant request for hangouts, hell, he'd made it through the whole month of July in a beautifully crafted and consistent funk, but Joe was right about something (for once). He was moving away to school, albeit in the same city, but he was still moving out and he wouldn't have time to spend with his brothers like he used to. So he pasted on a smile and made the trek to the weekly "Hey, it's Thursday!" beach party and bonfire in Malibu.
This would be Kevin's first time seeing everyone since his lower than normal low profile appearance at graduation. He didn't know if people would still be talking about what happened between he and Zac, if people even knew, or if people even cared. But he knew he couldn't hide in his room till college, so here he was standing awkwardly and alone (so much for brotherly bonding) as he was approached by a willowy wisp of a man who also went by the name William Beckett.
"Oldest Jonas right?"
Kevin tried not to roll his eyes at the term, since it was infinitely better than "Virgin that Efron cheated on", and for better or for worse William, was the first person other than his brothers to speak to him since he had gotten there.
"Actually, it's Kevin. Um, William, right?"
"Actually," William mimicked, "It's just Bill. The only people who call me William are my folks, my teachers and my parole officer"
Kevin shot Bill a quizzical look, not wanting to be fooled by an obvious joke, while also not really wanting to make friends with a juvenile delinquent. "You're kidding right? I mean if you aren't...that's cool? I guess."
Bill flashed Kevin a cheshire-cat-worthy grin, swung an arm around his neck and mussed his hair playfully "I like you, fuzzy. I hereby declare us buds."
Kevin released a half-relieved, half-frustrated sigh, not really knowing what to make of the new friendship that had been thrust upon him. But he figured his summer couldn't get any worse.
~
Bill was actually a really good guy once you got past his general Bill-ness. And apparently he took oceanside-friendship-declarations very seriously, cause for the rest of the summer, whenever Bill was going out he invited Kevin along. As a result Kevin even managed to make some new friends. Friends that hadn't been Zac's or his brother's first. For the first time ever he was simply known as Kevin. And he liked that a lot.
Bill's friends-- scratch that, Kevin's friends-- were an odd bunch. A random band of miscreants and rabble-rousers, many of whom had barely graduated, while some didn't even bother. Between Gabe's overt (and at times off-putting) flirtations, Chiz and Butcher's marijuana-induced musings on life, to Sisky's determined belief that every party needed a dance battle, Kevin was definitely surrounded by a good, albeit strange, cast of characters. And he took to them like a duck to water.
All had been going well. Great even, until one night at a Thursday bonfire, Kevin could see Pete Wentz approaching him, determination and possibly guilt flashing in his eyes. Kevin had spoken to neither Pete nor Zac since prom and really had no urge to start now. Especially not now that he was feeling so much better. He didn't know what to do because he couldn't very well run away, could he? No, he wasn't going to let himself be made a bigger fool of than Zac already did. But suddenly, like a knight in shinning Chuck Taylors, an angry yet attractive man pulled him away before Pete could speak. Kevin was sure he heard a faint "Kevin! Wait!" In the background, but he was now preoccupied with his saving grace in an ratty vintage tee.
Kevin knew of Mike. Hell, everyone at Hollywood High had heard of Mike Carden, but this was his first genuine face-to-face interaction with the man. The man (if rumours are to be believed, and obviously they always are), had an affair with a teacher AND his wife, punched the principal and tried to set fire to the gym. Definitely not a graduate and certainly not a dropout, Carden was H.H.S's most notorious shut out. In hindsight, he may have had better luck dealing with whatever Pete had to say.
"Yeah, sorry for grabbing you like that, but you looked like you could use the save."
At least he didn't sound like a hardened criminal, not that Kevin actually knew what hardened criminals sounded like.
"Uh, thanks?" Kevin cringed inwardly at his response, he may not have known Mike but he really didn't want to come across as simple. "I mean, thanks." Yeah, that's better.
"No problem, fuzzy," Mike replied with a smirk. Bill was the only one that called Kevin fuzzy. Did that mean that Bill had been talking about Kevin to Mike? No. That made no sense at all.
"I'm Carden. Uh, Mike, Mike Carden" Mike seemed somewhat nervous for reasons Kevin could only imagine. "I know," he blurted out in response before he could stop himself. Of course he knew. "I'm Kevin, Kevin Jonas."
"I know," Mike replied as he walked away looking back at Kevin over his shoulder one last time, leaving him awfully confused, and oddly taken with the man he barely knew.
~
Kevin's first week at USC was a strange one. He was lucky enough to get a private room, but actual privacy was at a minimum. Now that Joe had an actual place to go instead of class he was constantly around, and he and Bill had struck up this odd friendship that seemed to be entirely based on one-upping each other in dumber and more creative ways everyday. But this was definitely the best part. Running into Zac on the other hand...sucked. Kevin had managed to avoid Zac all summer, but that all came crashing to a halt on the first day of classes. Kevin was lost in thoughts of the mysterious Mike Carden as he waited for his Psychology class to start when he was interrupted by a familiar "Is this seat taken?"
He didn't have to look up to know who the voice belonged to.
"Hey Kev, how ya been?" Zac asked sheepishly as he pulled out the chair next to Kevin who was shocked at the gall his ex-boyfriend seemed to possess. Just as Zac got himself comfortable Kevin gathered his things and said "Actually, you can have that seat, and this one two" and quickly found the last remaining single seat at the front of the classroom.
For the next hour or so he could hardly concentrate, feeling Zac eyes practically boring holes in the back of his hair. And as hard as he tried he couldn't focus on anything that his professor had to say. Eventually, he just gave up and let his mind wander to other thoughts, happier thoughts, Mike Carden-esque thoughts. He hadn't seen Mike since the bonfire when they first met, and as much as he wanted to ask Bill about him, he was just too damned embarrassed. After all, what would a guy like Mike Carden want with him? Suddenly the sound of shuffling seats and bags brought him back to earth as he realized his lecture was done and all he wanted was to get out of the classroom with out having to speak to Zac. Luckily Zac was uncomfortably stuck speaking to a petite brunette who seemed to think that flipping her hair around was a fool proof man-catching plan. As Kevin snuck away they made eye contact one last time, Zac looking like he wanted to smother her with her shiny brown hair.
~
Upon returning to his dorm, Kevin was not surprised to find Joe and Bill playing Call of Duty on his brand new X-box, but he was infinitely shocked to find Mike Carden just sitting there on his bed as if this was a regular, every day occurrence.
"Um, hey guys. What's up?" Kevin asked uncomfortably. He desperately wanted to keep his cool around Carden, wanted to be seen as something other than Bill's geeky friend. So he figured his best bet would be to use as few words as possible.
"Fuzzy! You're back. D'ya miss me? Since you're up, can you get us some munch?"
Kevin didn't want to complain in front of Carden and the addition of Joe's pathetic "Pleeeeease Kev, I'm starrrrrving", had him instinctively reaching for the door.
Before he even got out the door he felt a warm hand on his shoulder. "I'll come with you, if you need an extra pair of hands."
The weight of Mike's hand on his shoulder felt so warm and good and right, and it took everything in his power to not lean back into Mike's chest and rest his head on Mike's shoulder.
"Sure, thanks. I'd appreciate it."
Mike held the door open for Kevin as they left and Kevin couldn't help but remember that Zac had never once held a door open for him.
~
Kevin and Mike decided to stop for lunch and bring the boys take-out in their own sweet time. Beggars can't be choosers, Kevin smugly thought to himself.
Once he finally relaxed he found that Carden was actually a really funny and smart guy, and he began to wonder about how much truth there was to all the rumours about him. Attractive, fun, mildly intimidating guys didn't just going around breaking up marriages and punching school officials, did they? Yeah, Mike was a little rough around the edges, but that didn't automatically make him an attempted arsonist, right?
As Kevin's mind continued to wander (as it was prone to doing) he could hear Mike calling his name to get his attention. "Sorry, what were you saying?" Focus, Kevin focus! Space cadets are NOT sexy!
"Actually I was wondering what exactly it was you were thinking about. It must have been riveting." Kevin may not have had all the experience in the world when it came to guys, but he was pretty sure that Mike was flirting with him.
"I was actually just, well...I was wondering about your reputation at Hollywood High," he could feel his cheeks burning bright red as he asked, feeling like maybe he had just managed to put every foot in his mouth.
"My reputation, huh?" Mike replied with a confused grin. "Wha'dya hear? That I knocked up the lunch lady and tried to blow up the science wing?"
"Actually, it was more like you had an affair with Mr. AND Mrs. Tuttle and tried to burn down the gym. Oh and you punched Principal Morton in the face."
Mike looked shocked and Kevin thought he may have even seen a flicker of sadness in his eyes, but he couldn't be sure.
"Well, I can honestly tell you that none of that shit is true. I'm really not a bad guy, my life was just kinda fucked up at the time."
Kevin was genuinely interested in what happened to Mike back then, but he didn't want to pry, and he really just wanted to lighten the mood.
"Well if you ask me, the real delinquents of H.H.S. were the Alexes. Those guys were hell on wheels."
"I know, right!" Mike exclaimed cheerfully. "Those guys were banned from metal shop, woodshop, home ec AND auto shop. I'm surprised the idiots still have 30 fingers between them."
They spent the rest of lunch talking and laughing for so long that they almost forgot to get food for the sad little gamers stuck back at the dorm.
~
Another week passed before Kevin heard from Mike again. He was starting to think that maybe Mike was just a figment of his imagination, like a unicorn or his seventh grade "girlfriend from Canada". But alas, there he was on the other end of the phone and Kevin prayed with all he had that this wasn't some sort of cruel series of dreams. So Kevin took a deep breathe and tried harder than hard to keep his cool.
"So Kevin, Bill and I were talking about you recently..." Mike's voice wandered off as if he was waiting to gauge Kevin's response, but he was met with silence. Kevin couldn't help but worry about what Bill could have been saying about him.
"Um Kevin? You still there?"
"Yeah, I'm here. So, you and Bill were talking about me?"
The trepidation in Kevin's voice was evident, as if he just waiting to be embarrassed or even worse, prematurely rejected.
"Yeah, I mean not in a gossipy way or anything, that's not really my style. He just told me that you were a big fan of Star Wars and I was just wondering if you wanted to go to Star Wars in concert. I mean, it's no big deal or anything, I just thought it might be fun or whatever."
Kevin waited a beat longer than is absolutely necessary to respond. Over eager is NOT sexy, he reminded himself.
"Tha-that sounds great!" he stammered out exuberantly. Truth be told, he really has wanted to go to see Star Wars in concert, he just figured no one else would want to.
"Awesome," Mike sounded happy, really genuinely happy and Kevin was smiling so hard his face hurt. "I'll get tickets for this Saturday."
~
Luckily for Kevin the week flew by, and with the exception of a few tense run-ins with Zac, all was going pretty darn well. Joe and Bill have made themselves a pretty well known feature around the dorms, and his other friends were starting to follow suit. He even heard someone refer to him as that "Kinda lame dude with all the cool friends". But even that couldn't bring him down. Because if it wasn't for his cool friends he wouldn't be going out on his first date with Mike Carden in a matter of hours. Come to think of it Kevin wasn't exactly sure if this was a date. He didn't want to assume, and at the end of the day he figured if you're not sure whether it's a date or not, it probably isn't. That however didn't stop Kevin from spending hour after hour trying on everything in his wardrobe to an unenthusiastic audience of Bill and Joe.
"Kev, seriously. He has seen you wearing knee-high leather boots with a hoodie. If that hasn't driven him away nothing will."
"Fuzzy Jr's right Kevin," Bill chimed in, lying sideways across Kevin's bed, letting all the blood rush to his head as a distraction. "It's Carden. It's not like he's some kinda Julio Eglesias Casanova type guy anyway. Just be your adorable little panda self and you'll have a great date."
"It's not a date" Kevin muttered under his breath. He really didn't want to get his hopes too high just to end up disappointed.
"Whatever Fuzz, you'll have a great time on your completely platonic, one-on-one evening sitting in the dark listening to the greatest music in the galaxy, literally, with a guy you wanna make babies with. But NOT a date. Got it. My bad."
Kevin just rolled his eyes and continued on searching for the perfect scarf.
"Well Kev, if your date doesn't work out-"
"It's NOT a date!"
"Whatever," Joe continued, "If your whatever Bill called it doesn't work out would you mind if I dated Carden?"
"What? You're gay, Joe?" Kevin had always had his suspicions, but he never really thought it was true.
"Me, no. Not gay, but Carden is pretty fucking cool so I'd be willing to experiment."
Bill just laughed and said "Don't let Gabe hear you say that. You'll break the poor kid's heart. I think his ultimate goal is have Joe like some sort of straight trophy token thing. He had mentioned something about schematics and duct tape, but I'm pretty sure he was joking...I think."
By this point Kevin had heard enough and Joe and Bill's help was definitely doing more harm than good.
"Okay let's get this straight. This is NOT I repeat NOT a date. Joe you're not gay, so you're not dating Mike because you think he's cool. Bill please make sure any plans your friends have to abduct my brother are thwarted"
Suddenly both Joe and Kevin's phones beeped indicating a text message. "Oh, Mike's downstairs I gotta go."
As Kevin opened the door to leave Joe shouted "Kev! Nick says good luck on your date with the convict."
Kevin slammed the door to the sounds of the boys in his room howling with laughter.
~
Star Wars in concert was better than Kevin could have even imagined. Kevin couldn't believe that Mike was as big a fan as he was. It was nice getting to know the until recently hidden geekier side of Mike. But at the end of the day Mike could still make geeky look so sexy and Kevin couldn't believe he was so lucky to be on this platonic outing with him.
During the show Mike had never tried to hold Kevin's hand, or made any other real indication that he wanted something more than friendship. While disappointed, Kevin honestly felt that having Mike as a friend was better than not having Mike in his life at all. So he settled in and enjoyed the concert the same way he would with any friend. Forcing himself to ignore the tight knot forming in his chest.
After the show Mike took Kevin to the Rainbow Bar and Grill on Sunset. It was Mike's favourite place where the likes of Guns and Roses and Motley Crue could be found in the 80's and 90's. It wasn't so crazy these days, but to Mike it was like a holy grail. Since he was a regular they didn't get carded at the door so they found a booth and Mike ordered a couple of beers.
Kevin wasn't really much of a drinker, but he wanted Mike to regard him as an equal. A man's man (who just happened to really like kissing other men). A few beers deep Kevin could feel the knot in his chest loosen as well as his tongue, he had never felt so confident around Mike as he did at that very moment, so he decided to strike up a new conversation.
"So, Mike...Carden. Should I just call you Carden? All your friends seem to and since we're friends now I guess I should too." Kevin didn't really know what he talking about, but talking to Carden just always felt great. And what felt even better was sitting next to Carden which Kevin was apparently now doing with a awkward shuffle to join Mike on his side of the booth. They were flush against on another from shoulder to foot and Kevin couldn't help but sigh.
"Kev-Kevin" Mike started "Are you drunk?"
Kevin was appalled at the insinuation "I'm not drunk, Mike, I'm just...happy. Your friendship makes me happy, you make me happy. You know, if you say happy enough times it doesn't even sound like a word anymore. Haaa-pppy, Happy, Happyyyyy."
Mike couldn't help but laugh at Kevin's antics and the way he was looking at him suddenly made that knot reappear in Kevin's chest.
"Well I gotta say, Jonas, you do make me pretty fucking happy."
Kevin looked absolutely scandalized by the compliment. "Mike, you really shouldn't swear. My mom says that people who swear are low class and I don't want her to think that about you if she ever meets you. Not that there would be any reason too, but she has met Bill and I think she has a crush on him, which is super weird and-"
And Kevin's rambling was finally brought to a halt when Mike kissed him full and strong on the mouth. Kevin's head was suddenly swimming with confusion and alcohol and Mike. How could everything he had wanted for so long finally be happening? Then there was no more time for thinking as Mike was slowly maybe even hesitantly licking Kevin's bottom lip, seeking permission that Kevin was more than happy to grant. Soon Mike was licking his way into Kevin's mouth and Kevin was incredibly thankful to be sitting down since he was sure his entire body save for his mouth was no longer working. They kissed for a while longer, Kevin's hands grabbing the edges of Mike's t-shirt, while Mike could help but muss Kevin's curls.
Their reverie was eventually broken by the simultaneous ringing of their phones. Mike's blaring out 'You're the best' by Joe Esposito (Bill), and Kevin's ringing 'Funky Cold Medina' (Joe). Without even discussing it they both hit ignore, cause in this moment right now nothing was more important than this.
~
Kissing Mike was awesome. And now that they'd been kissing for nearly a month they had gotten really really good at it. Kissing Zac was never like this cause he was just, well selfish. And kissing never just stayed kissing with Zac, and at the time Kevin was NOT ready to be felt up by anyone. Lately he'd been re-evaluating his views on the matter and whether or not he was ready for Mike to do some feeling. He knew that they needed to talk about it. Knew that Mike had way more experience than he did, I mean who wouldn't want to touch Mike? But he wasn't sure how to bring it up. He thought about talking to Bill or Joe about it first but then he remember who Bill and Joe actually were and what a bad idea that was. So far Mike had been super patient and that made Kevin want him even more. He would talk to Mike about it. Soon. Or eventually. Someday. In the meanwhile he was just happy to keep on kissing.
~
Mike was meeting Kevin after class for lunch, and as usual he was doing his damndest to avoid Zac and his increasingly aggresive and discomforting attempts at flirting. Kevin thought that maybe if he just gave Zac time to speak his piece they could both move on. He could tell Zac about Mike and the problem would be done and dusted. If he was man enough to date Mike Carden he was definitely man enough to deal with Zac Efron. So Kevin got to class early and found Zac hoping that he could clear the air.
"Hey Zac."
"Kevin, hi!" Zac sounded genuinely excited that Kevin was talking to him, but wanting to avoid mixed signals, Kevin continued.
"Um, I just wanted to say that about everything that happened senior year, no hard feelings, okay. I don't hate you, at all. In fact I don't really even think about you anymore. I'm with someone knew who I lo-, who I really like so let's just call a truce, alright?"
Zac look shocked, not only that Kevin was actually talking to him, but that he had found someone new. And Zac couldn't help but wonder if Kevin was going to say he loved this new guy.
"Look, Kev, I want to apologize for how I treated you in high school. If I had known then what I know now I would have never done it."
Curiosity got the best of Kevin and he just had to know. "You didn't know that cheating on your boyfriend was wrong? That's pathetic, Zac."
"No not that. Well yeah cheating is wrong and I always knew that, but I was too stupid to see what a great thing we had back then. I was immature and foolish and I'm sorry I hurt you. If there is anyway you could see it in your heart to forgive me, I promise I'll do better this time. What do ya say? Give me another chance?"
Kevin couldn't believe his ears, Zac was begging him to come back? Even if he was single he wouldn't consider it for.one.second.
"Sorry, Zac, but I've moved on. And you're not a part of it. Mike makes me really happy, and I wouldn't give him up for anything, but I hope you find what you're looking for."
Zac didn't seem at all pleased with that answer.
After class was done Kevin was speaking to their professor as Zac left. He saw a pretty scruffy-hot looking guy wandering around seeming pretty lost. He approached Zac curiously.
"Hey man, do you know Kevin Jonas? I was supposed to meet him here, but I can't seem to find him."
Knowing that Kevin would be stuck in class for at least another five minutes, Zac took this chance to talk to the new man in his life.
"Yeah, I know Kevin, really well, if you know what I mean. We went out in high school. Had a thing for me then and I'm pretty sure he still does. And you are?"
Mike clenched his fists and willed himself to stay calm, Kevin wouldn't appreciate Mike missing their date by kicking this guys ass and ending up in jail.
"I'm Mike, Kevin's boyfriend."
"Well, hey, Mike, I'm Zac. And Kev's just in class finishing up with Prof and he should be out any minute. Hope you have as much fun with him as I did. Between you and me, for a virgin, the kid sure knows what he doing. So slutty and pure all at the same time. He's like a male version of the Maddona-Whore complex all rolled up into one. Sorry, sometimes psych class just sticks with me. But when you're done with him, be sure to send him back my way. See ya round, Mike."
Mike just wanted to punch that shit-eating grin off of Zac's stupid pretty boy face. He really didn't know how true the things Zac said were and part of him didn't want to know. All he and Kevin had done till then was some serious making out, and Mike didn't push because he knew that Kevin was a virgin. But if what Zac was saying was true, how chaste was his new boyfriend after all? He couldn't think straight, images of Kevin and Zac invading his mind. He had to get out of there, because the last thing he wanted was to blow up at Kevin. He wanted to trust him, but he needed to take a step back. So before Kevin got a chance to see him, Mike left.
~
Mike never showed up after class, wasn't answering his phone or replying to Kevin's texts. He was starting to get worried so he called Bill at the body shop they worked at to see if he had any info.
"Mike's here at work, Fuzz, just came in about an hour ago asking to pick up an extra shift. Practically begging. Is there trouble in paradise? Cause I'm sure your Auntie Bill can help figure it out."
"This isn't a joke Bill!" Kevin yelled, and Kevin never yelled, at least not to non-sibling type people. "He was supposed to meet me here at school I'm all freaked out cause he's not answering his phone and you tell me he just bailed? Well, tell him-- actually don't tell him anything, I've got a half hour before class and I need to calm down."
Bill had never heard Kevin like that before, and as proud as he was to see some backbone, he really didn't want either of his friends hurt. So he sashayed over to Mike and just stared at his friend.
"What do you want, Beckett?" Mike only called Bill by his last name when he was in no mood to talk.
"Well, Carden, I just spoke to Fuzz-- I mean Kevin-- and he is none too pleased with you. In fact he sounded pi-issed."
"He was pissed? Well, whatever, I can't deal with him right now and his half truths."
"Mike, are you accusing Kev of lying? Cause that kid maybe many things, but a liar he ain't. Look, I'll cover your shift and you go and figure things out with your guy. Whatever it, is can't be all that bad."
Deep down Mike knew Bill was right, so he gave his friend a pat on the back, said thanks and headed back to the campus.
In the meanwhile, Kevin was nursing a coffee trying to figure out what could have possibly happened when Zac found him.
"Hey Kev, you alright? You don't look so hot. Weren't you supposed to meeting that new boyfriend of yours?"
Zac was greatful that Kevin was so wrapped up in his own thoughts so he didn't notice the smirk forming on his lips when he mentioned Mike.
"I don't know what happened, Zac. I mean everything was great and then, well, I don't know. But he seems to be avoiding me and I have no clue what I did."
Zac almost felt bad when he saw how sad Kevin was, but Kevin was fiercely loyal and Zac missed that, wanted the kind of devotion that only Kevin had ever given him back.
So he tentatively wrapped his arm around Kevin's shoulder and let Kevin rest his head. Kevin sighed and closed his eyes for a moment to collect himself. He knew he shouldn't be leaning on Zac, but he really didn't know what else to do. Unfortunately it was in that moment that Mike entered the quad and saw his boyfriend in the arms of his ex. Mike and Zac made eye contact, but Mike broke it first, deciding against speaking to Kevin, and just walking away. And Zac also kept quiet.
~
It had been a couple of days since Mike and Kevin last spoke. Neither one wanting to break their silence first. Joe called Bill, cause he couldn't take Kevin's moping anymore. And frankly he missed hanging with Bill, but it seemed to Joe that Mike must have gotten him in the divorce.
But Bill missed Joe and Kevin just as much and wouldn't abide by their friend's stupidity any longer. They just needed a plan.
~
The next day Bill spent most of the morning convincing him to drive him to Kevin's dorm so he could pick up some video games he had left behind. Mike was reluctant to say the least.
"Please Mike, Kevin won't even be there. I need to return those games to Blockbuster or they could ruin my credit rating. And that shit stays with you for years. Do you want to be the reason I can't buy my future wife and children a house? Cause you know what happens then Mike? We'll all come to live with you."
Carden rolled his eyes though he did find the scenario quite frightening. He grabbed his car keys and headed out the door with Bill trailing behind. Mike only promising to take them there if Bill shut up.
At the same time Joe was trying to get Kevin out of bed cause he had taken to bringing girls back to Kevin's room during class hours and he was really starting to miss that. He knew it was wrong, but it was also terribly convenient. Bill texted him to say that they were on their way over and all he had to do was keep Kevin in the room till they got there. So Joe sat on the bed with his big brother and drew soothing circle patterns on his back knowing that he had a hell of an afternoon in store for him. He wasn't quite sure why Kevin and Carden were fighting, but he didn't like it one bit. Mike made his brother happy, and they needed a chance to fix things. Joe was determined to see his brother happy again, and he silently prayed that this would work.
A knock on the door roused Kevin from his half-awake, half-catatonic state as Joe went to answer the door.
"I'll get it," Joe offered quickly. "It's just Bill here to pick up some games."
"Alright, well, I don't really feel like talking so just tell him I'm asleep," Kevin said while covering his head with a blanket.
Joe felt a little bit guilty for tricking his brother, but he knew it was for the best.
Mike followed listlessly behind Bill down the hall to Kevin's room.
"I don't know why I couldn't just wait in the car for you. How many games are in there?"
"Don't worry man, Kevin's not even there, I just need an extra pair of eyes to make sure I get everything back. You don't want my future family to be homeless do you?"
Mike just figured the faster they were in the faster they could leave, so he kept walking.
As Bill knocked on the door, Mike looked at him curiously since no one was supposed to be there. Before answering, Joe told Kevin he'd be right back, just running out to get some snacks.
Before Mike knew what was going on Kevin's door flew open and Bill shoved him inside as Joe ran out quickly yelling "I'm sorry guys, now fix this shit."
Kevin sat up quickly and confused, no understanding what was happening, as Mike just stood by the door bewildered.
"What the hell? Kevin? Bill said you wouldn't be here"
"Well, Joe never mentioned you were coming, so I guess the joke is on us."
Mike immidiately turned to the door and tried the doorknob, but it wouldn't budge. Suddenly they heard from outside. "Carden, Fuzz, you guys aren't getting out of there till you fix whatever the hell it is that you broke. And believe me, Joe and I can wait out here ALL day. We really have very little going on in the plans department. So getting to talking."
Mike pounded on the door a few more times for good measure, but realized that if anyone had the time to follow through on a plan as stupid as this it would be Bill and Joe.
"Wow, you really want to get away from me that badly, huh? Wish I knew what I did to cause all this grief," Kevin said blankly, not a trace of emotion in his voice.
"You know what you did, or should I say who," Mike blurted out. If he had to be stuck in here he was at least going to say his piece.
"What the hell are you even talking about, there hasn't been anyone else! Why would I want anyone else when you are ALL I EVER WANTED!"
Mike felt a rush of warmth at Kevin's words, but wasn't giving up that easily.
"What about Zac? You know, that pretty boy ex of yours?"
Kevin was shocked, this is about Zac? "What about him, we broke up before you and I even met!"
"Well according to pretty boy, you and he had some pretty fun times. Stuff you never told me about and stuff he seemed to think you would be into again."
"Whar? I don't want Zac. I barely even like the guy as a friend!"
"Well, it didn't look like that to me. I came by to meet you for lunch, but instead I ran into Zac who informed me that you guys used to be really close. Like, you did everything short of everything close. And he seemed to get off on what did he call it? Oh yeah, your 'Madonna-Whore complex'"
Kevin was livid. When he found Zac again he was going to, he was going to, well he was going to do something and it wouldn't be pleasant in the least. Revenge wasn't really his strong suit.
"So I bailed," Mike continued, "but after Bill convinced me that I was overreacting I rushed back to campus to find you, and instead I see you in his arms. Explain that to me, Kevin!"
At that moment any passive aggresive tendencies Kevin had fell away. His name and his honoured had been besmerched and he was not going to stand for it.
"For your information, Mike, Zac and I never came close to having sex. That was part of the reason why he cheated on me when we were together. I never kept him satisfied. So I don't know what you think happened between he and I but I can assure you it was nothing more than 'some making out and a few shy handjobs', his words, not mine. And what you saw was Zac comfortimg me, or at least I thought that's what he was doing, but I guess he was just causing trouble"
Mike winced at the thought of Kevin touching Zac that intimately, but he also knew that he had been played for a fool.
"Zac told me he wanted me back the same day you guys met. I told him that I was happy with you and at the very most he and I could be friends. That is it. I never led him on or gave him any indication that it could or would go any further. God, Mike, I love you, I would never do that to you."
Kevin didn't even realize what he said to Mike, he was so wound up, but Mike heard it loud and clear. "You, you love me?"
And just like that all of Kevin's worries and fears regarding Mike dissappeared. If he was going to lose him, he would at least know that he did everything in his power to fix this.
"I-I do love you Mike. And maybe it's too soon, and you probably don't feel the same, but it's true. I love you, Mike Carden. Why couldn't you just trust me instead of some guy you didn't even know?"
Mike knew that he had to tell Kevin the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. At least he didn't have to swear on a bible first.
"God Kev, I am so sorry, I just, well I just have some trust issues and I guess that's on me. But the minute I thought you were still into Zac I couldn't stand it, so I ran. I'm sorry."
Kevin softened considerably hearing this, but it wasn't quite enough. "What happened Mike? Who hurt you?"
"So obviously you've heard all the rumours about me in my senior year. That I was kicked out for being the philandering terrorist of H.H.S. but that wasn't even close to the truth." He took a deep breath closed his eyes and began.
"My senior year of high school I was seeing this guy, Jared. He was older, and cool and as far as I knew he was everything I wanted. My family was going though a hard time back then and I confided in Jared, told him everything that was happening in my life. I trusted him and he, he..."
Mike's voice trailed off and Kevin was sure he could see his eyelashes dampen as his eyes brimmed with tears. Whatever had happened to Mike must have been bad, cause Kevin had never seen him look so sad.
"My folks were fighting all the time, my dad spending too much money, going out all the time and pretty much neglecting us at home. I figured he was having an affair, but I didn't want to say anything to mom before I knew for sure. So I followed him one night after he left home and we ended up at some shitty hole in the wall motel. I waited and waited for the woman to show, but no woman ever did. Instead Jared, MY Jared pulled up and snuck away with my father."
Kevin couldn't believe what Mike was telling him, how anyone could be so cruel to their boyfriend or even worse their own child.
"I waited till they came out and confronted them." By this point Mike was sobbing, Kevin holding him tight silently reassuring him that the worst was over.
"I sat in my car crying until they final appeared holding hands and kissing as if they didn't have a care in the world. And do you know what they had the nerve to tell me? That they were in love, and that because of me they had found true happiness. Not one ounce of sorrow or regret. They said they were happy the truth was finally out so we could all be free to lead our real lives. And freedom for me meant watching my dad run off with the first guy I ever loved, and real life meant dropping out of high school in order to help support my mom and myself. The reason I never dispelled any of the rumours about me, was because the truth, the truth was so much worse."
Kevin just held Mike in his arms, not having a clue what to say. Mike had been betrayed by the people who were supposed to love him and protect him. Kevin couldn't imagine ever hurting anyone like that. Especially not Mike.
"I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you." Kevin had no other words in the moment, and really nothing else mattered.
As Mike looked up to Kevin eyes red and wet he replied "I love you too."
In that moment they took all their pain, all their frustration and worry and poured it into each other, kissing and holding one another as if they would never get another chance.
They moved roughly and quickly with little if any finesse, their kisses tasted of tears and past pain and renewed promises. Kevin moaned into Mike's mouth in a way that startled himself as much as it turned Mike on. Kevin could barely think, his need unparraled to anything he had ever felt before. And if the growing bulge in Mike's jeans was any indication Mike felt the exact same way. Their kisses continued, leading to frenzied hands searching and grabbing at a desperate pace.
Shirts and pants were discarded with such haste that they surprised themselves. Soon they were wearing only matching black boxer briefs and flushed red faces as Kevin was the first to speak. His voice out of breath as if he had just run an 8-minute mile.
“Mike…I want you. Want you inside me now. Want nothing but you right now”
Mike's body was moving light years faster than his brain, and it didn't look like he was going to catch up anytime soon. But he tried. "Kevin are you sure? We don't have to do this. Especially if you're just trying to prove something. I'm sorry about the Zac thing, but seriously we can wait."
But Kevin didn't want to wait. He was tired of waiting especially now that he knew he had found his happily ever after.
~
On the other side of the door Bill and Joe were bored. So very bored. They had played "hot hands" until they couldn't bear smacking or being smacked anymore, the tops and bottoms of their hands red and sore. They could hear them through the door before, and at first it didn't sound good. Heck, they didn't even know if these two were meant to really be together, but they at least needed a shot. Then they heard what sounded alot like sobbing which got Joe up off the floor ready to fight Carden for making his brother cry. He knew he'd never win, but he'd at least get one good shot in. But Bill held him back telling him that he was pretty sure it was Mike they were hearing, which was well, really weird.
Eventually everything got quite and for a minute Joe wondered aloud whether they had fallen asleep. It made no sense, but this really wasn't one of his more logical days anyway.
Suddenly out of the silence Bill and Joe were shocked to hear what sounded like a pained cry. Followed by several more. The cries then changed into moans and then finally whimpers before Bill stated the obvious "Um Joe, I don't think they're sleeping." Joe knew what was going on, but Bill's acknowledgement just seemed to make the whole thing worse.
"Aww, come on guys, ewww! You know we're out here." As Joe was desperately trying to figure out new places to spend his days they were greeted with the sound of laughter punctuated by Kevin yelling "Joe! Bill! Go away!". The boys were half way down the hall by the time they heard a faint "Thank you!" which they were pretty sure was Mike.
~
The next time Kevin ran into Zac he had his arm around Mike's waist, and Mike's around his own, hands stuffed obnoxiously in each other's back pockets. As they passed him Kevin considered, not acknowledging him at all, but he was raised better than that. He offered a short and disinterested "Hey Zac, what's up?" over his shoulder, not even stopping for a response. It's not like he had the time to stop anyway, he and Mike had a whole life together ahead of them.
~
THE END.
Author: la_fours a.k.a. Tonya.
For: skoosiepants
Pairing: Mike/Kevin
Main Characters: Kevin Jonas, Mike Carden, Joe Jonas, Bill Beckett, Zac Efron
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 9k
Disclaimer: I own nothing at all, cause if I did Kevin Jonas and Mike Carden would be living in a bungalow on Fire Island.
Summary: High school/College AU. Mike and Kevin falling in love, Zac Efron being a bad apple, Bill/Joe tomfoolery.
Notes: This is my first JoBros/TAI/Bandslash fic evah! It's also the biggest one shot I've ever written so please be kind (Think of the children! Won't somebody think of the children!) This is for our super mod skoosiepants, which made me even MORE nervous. I really hope you like it Skoosie!
Prompt: A first-time fic, misunderstandings would be awesome, but with a happy ending. Can be canon-ish, AU, or JONAS-like
Dating Zac was good, probably even better than good. But since he was the first guy Kevin ever dated, he wasn't quite sure. He had liked Zac ever since he knew what it was to like someone. Even before he realized he was gay, he just always liked Zac. So when Zac had asked him to be his boyfriend in senior year, he obviously said yes. Well actually, the first thing he said was "Huh-wha?", but the second thing he said was a goofy, emphatic yes.
You see, Kevin wasn't one of the cool kids in high school. He was smart and sweet and the older brother of cool kids and for him that was enough. He even found his place in the murky waters of high school hierarchy by remaining on the fringes of cool. He may not have been on the football/basketball/soccer teams, but he was the best equipment manager around. He may not have run the student council, but he volunteered for almost any and every committee they had to offer. And even though he wasn't particularly hip or popular, he was the older and wiser brother to Hollywood High School's most well known siblings since Liam and Noel graduated back in the 90's. Half the reason anyone even cared who Kevin was was because of his little brothers, Joe and Nick. While Kevin was just happy to graduate high school unscathed, his kid brothers had an entirely different take on the high school experience. Nick spent his time overachieving to the fullest as co-captain of several sporting teams as well as Vice-President of the student council. The only person outranking him was one Zac Efron. And while Nick spent his time trying to out-do the most everything guy in school Joe kept himself busy...well, trying to look busy. It wasn't enough for him to be the "school clown" (class clown being far too small time for him), he also went out of his way to charm the entire faculty into overlooking his various absences and shenanigans. Joe made the female teachers feel special and the male teachers feel cool, and somehow that was enough to get him by.
But Kevin was comfortable with his low profile, being the voice of reason and occasional referee keeping his brothers in line. He could only imagine what next year would be like after he left and his brothers were finally able to run the whole show.
But the anonymity disappeared the minute he became "the guy Zac Efron is dating". At first he shied away from the attention, yearning to keep his private life private, but that was a foolish request considering he was dating the HBIC of Hollywood High. So he smiled his best fake smile and promised himself he would get used to it.
~
"Kevin you can't really be serious about this virgin thing can you?"
It wasn't the first time that Zac had questioned Kevin's decision to keep his virginity intact, and it probably wasn't going to be the last. He wasn't really in the mood to argue about how it started out as something he did because his parents asked him too, but eventually became something he believed him himself. He had already explained that it wasn't necessarily about waiting until marriage, but about feeling absolutely one hundred percent secure with himself and his relationship. So he just sighed loud enough to let Zac know that this conversation would lead to nothing but headaches and headaches were not really what sexytimes were made of.
"I don't mean to push Kevin, but we've been together for what? Three months now? And nothing. You know your brothers just wear their rings for show right? I'm even pretty sure that Frankie has been playing doctor with Miley's little sister for at least a year."
Kevin rolled his eyes and tried to convince himself that the reason Zac was so pushy was because he loved him. Not that Zac had told him as much, but that had to be the reason, right?
"I'm just not ready yet Zac" Kevin finally replied. "I just want to make sure that it's right, and that I'm really ready. Can't you understand that?"
Zac just shifted away from Kevin on the couch saying, "I just don't know Kev, it's easy for a guy to get the wrong impression, like you're not really into me or something. I just need some reassurance is all."
Not wanting to antagonize Zac anymore than he already had, Kevin shimmied closer on the couch and proceeded to give Zac the best handjob he knew how. In hindsight it probably wasn't very good, but it seemed to keep Zac satisfied for now, and left Kevin feeling like he at least hadn't completely compromised everything he believed in.
~
The last month before graduation came and went in a flurry of excitement. Things with Zac had been going pretty great and he had even stopped bugging Kevin about sex so much. And now to thank him for his devotion and patience Kevin decided that prom night would be the night he finally gave in and lost his virginity to Zac. It only seemed right, as they were headed to college together in the fall and Kevin longed to fit in and be a mature, sex-having college freshman. He and Zac hadn't planned on rooming together, but he knew with the two of them living away from home they would make the best of their situation. Yup, after the prom Kevin Jonas would no longer be a virgin, and he could also be proud that he waited for the right guy.
The actual prom was a blur between the running around Kevin had to do for prom committee and the fluttering the butterflies were doing in his stomach. As far as he could recall the night went something like soggy chicken, over-cooked vegetables, Zac and Selena; king and queen, William Beckett and his crew getting kicked out for smoking, drinking and the fact that half of them graduated last year, and before he knew it the DJ was playing the last song of the night and sadly Zac was no where to be found. But if Kevin was anything, he was optimistic, and having the whole night alone with Zac would be a million times better that the silly little last dance at the prom. So he ducked out early and made sure that the room he had rented had everything they needed. Kevin had almost had a stroke buying all the necessities at the drug store, but tonight would more than make up for it. He lit a few candles and took one last look at himself straightening out his rumpled tux before he went back downstairs to find Zac. Everything would be different after tonight, he could just feel it.
As the senior class filled out of the ballroom and into the lobby Kevin still couldn't find Zac. Though he was lucky enough to find Zac's best friend Corbin.
"Uh-hey man, have you seen Zac around?" Kevin managed to ask while somehow keeping his cool. He didn't want to let on as to why he was in such a hurry to find his boyfriend.
"Not lately, Kev, but we were talking about checking out all the different after parties so my best guess is that he'd be up in my room changing out of his suit. Take my room key, cause he might be in the shower or something." Kevin's cheeks flushed a deep red at the thought of Zac in the shower, so he took the key card from Corbin and quickly thanked him as he headed upstairs.
When he got to the room, Kevin thought of just opening the door to greet Zac in whatever state if undress he may have been in. But Kevin was raised better than that and instead decided to knock. He was nothing if not a gentleman.
"Coming"
The voice on other side of the door didn't sound like Zac, but Kevin just figured it was Lucas or one of their other friends. Instead he was met with a very wet, nearly naked Pete Wentz. Thank God for towels.
"Umm...Kevin right?" Pete asked as he started to fidget uncomfortably in front of the door. "What are you doing here?"
"I-uh, I was looking for Zac, have you seen him? I'm sorry to interrupt, I probably just have the wrong room."
Then Kevin heard a voice that was so familiar he knew he had the right room.
"Who is it babe? Room service here?" And as he came out of the bathroom equally wet and towel clad as Pete it finally dawned on Kevin what was actually happening.
"Oh my God, Zac...what, I mean, why? I mean, oh my God!" In Kevin's headed that sounded way more eloquent than his mouth permitted, but the point was clear.
"Oh Jesus, Pete pass me that robe" Just hearing Zac say Pete's name filled him with so much everything. Disgust, hatred and most of all shame. Shame that he was going to break his vow for someone like Zac Efron.
In the hallway, Kevin proceeded to pace back and forth trying to get his thoughts in order.
"Kev? Um, I don't know what to say."
"How about you start with what the hell you were doing naked and wet with Pete Wentz? Actually scratch that, I can figure that one out myself. But...why?"
Zac eyes flashed a look that could either be read as guilt or pity, Kevin couldn't tell which and wasn't even sure that he wanted to.
"Man, Kev. I'm 18 years old. How long did you expect me to wait? Did you really think that some making out and a few shy hand jobs were going to tide me over forever? How long did you actually expect me to wait?"
Kevin winced at Zac's flippant discription of their intimate moments and he could tell in Zac's heart of hearts he felt he had done nothing wrong. That it was all Kevin's fault that this had happened. So he answered honestly, hoping to regain some dignity.
"Honestly, I had hoped that you would wait until tonight." And with that he gave him Corbin's key and walked away head held high.
I will not cry, I will not cry, I will not cry.
When he made it back to his own hotel room, he laid on the bed not bothering to take off his suit or even blow out the candles. And then he cried.
~
"Kev c'monnnn, you've been lying in bed for half the damn summer, and it's really getting in the way of our pre-college brotherly bonding!"
Along with nails on a chalkboard and the constant drip of a leaky faucet, the high-pitched whine of Joe Jonas was possibly the most annoying sound Kevin at ever heard. But after four weeks of wallowing, it finally got him out of bed and back into the real world.
Kevin wanted to ignore Joe's constant request for hangouts, hell, he'd made it through the whole month of July in a beautifully crafted and consistent funk, but Joe was right about something (for once). He was moving away to school, albeit in the same city, but he was still moving out and he wouldn't have time to spend with his brothers like he used to. So he pasted on a smile and made the trek to the weekly "Hey, it's Thursday!" beach party and bonfire in Malibu.
This would be Kevin's first time seeing everyone since his lower than normal low profile appearance at graduation. He didn't know if people would still be talking about what happened between he and Zac, if people even knew, or if people even cared. But he knew he couldn't hide in his room till college, so here he was standing awkwardly and alone (so much for brotherly bonding) as he was approached by a willowy wisp of a man who also went by the name William Beckett.
"Oldest Jonas right?"
Kevin tried not to roll his eyes at the term, since it was infinitely better than "Virgin that Efron cheated on", and for better or for worse William, was the first person other than his brothers to speak to him since he had gotten there.
"Actually, it's Kevin. Um, William, right?"
"Actually," William mimicked, "It's just Bill. The only people who call me William are my folks, my teachers and my parole officer"
Kevin shot Bill a quizzical look, not wanting to be fooled by an obvious joke, while also not really wanting to make friends with a juvenile delinquent. "You're kidding right? I mean if you aren't...that's cool? I guess."
Bill flashed Kevin a cheshire-cat-worthy grin, swung an arm around his neck and mussed his hair playfully "I like you, fuzzy. I hereby declare us buds."
Kevin released a half-relieved, half-frustrated sigh, not really knowing what to make of the new friendship that had been thrust upon him. But he figured his summer couldn't get any worse.
~
Bill was actually a really good guy once you got past his general Bill-ness. And apparently he took oceanside-friendship-declarations very seriously, cause for the rest of the summer, whenever Bill was going out he invited Kevin along. As a result Kevin even managed to make some new friends. Friends that hadn't been Zac's or his brother's first. For the first time ever he was simply known as Kevin. And he liked that a lot.
Bill's friends-- scratch that, Kevin's friends-- were an odd bunch. A random band of miscreants and rabble-rousers, many of whom had barely graduated, while some didn't even bother. Between Gabe's overt (and at times off-putting) flirtations, Chiz and Butcher's marijuana-induced musings on life, to Sisky's determined belief that every party needed a dance battle, Kevin was definitely surrounded by a good, albeit strange, cast of characters. And he took to them like a duck to water.
All had been going well. Great even, until one night at a Thursday bonfire, Kevin could see Pete Wentz approaching him, determination and possibly guilt flashing in his eyes. Kevin had spoken to neither Pete nor Zac since prom and really had no urge to start now. Especially not now that he was feeling so much better. He didn't know what to do because he couldn't very well run away, could he? No, he wasn't going to let himself be made a bigger fool of than Zac already did. But suddenly, like a knight in shinning Chuck Taylors, an angry yet attractive man pulled him away before Pete could speak. Kevin was sure he heard a faint "Kevin! Wait!" In the background, but he was now preoccupied with his saving grace in an ratty vintage tee.
Kevin knew of Mike. Hell, everyone at Hollywood High had heard of Mike Carden, but this was his first genuine face-to-face interaction with the man. The man (if rumours are to be believed, and obviously they always are), had an affair with a teacher AND his wife, punched the principal and tried to set fire to the gym. Definitely not a graduate and certainly not a dropout, Carden was H.H.S's most notorious shut out. In hindsight, he may have had better luck dealing with whatever Pete had to say.
"Yeah, sorry for grabbing you like that, but you looked like you could use the save."
At least he didn't sound like a hardened criminal, not that Kevin actually knew what hardened criminals sounded like.
"Uh, thanks?" Kevin cringed inwardly at his response, he may not have known Mike but he really didn't want to come across as simple. "I mean, thanks." Yeah, that's better.
"No problem, fuzzy," Mike replied with a smirk. Bill was the only one that called Kevin fuzzy. Did that mean that Bill had been talking about Kevin to Mike? No. That made no sense at all.
"I'm Carden. Uh, Mike, Mike Carden" Mike seemed somewhat nervous for reasons Kevin could only imagine. "I know," he blurted out in response before he could stop himself. Of course he knew. "I'm Kevin, Kevin Jonas."
"I know," Mike replied as he walked away looking back at Kevin over his shoulder one last time, leaving him awfully confused, and oddly taken with the man he barely knew.
~
Kevin's first week at USC was a strange one. He was lucky enough to get a private room, but actual privacy was at a minimum. Now that Joe had an actual place to go instead of class he was constantly around, and he and Bill had struck up this odd friendship that seemed to be entirely based on one-upping each other in dumber and more creative ways everyday. But this was definitely the best part. Running into Zac on the other hand...sucked. Kevin had managed to avoid Zac all summer, but that all came crashing to a halt on the first day of classes. Kevin was lost in thoughts of the mysterious Mike Carden as he waited for his Psychology class to start when he was interrupted by a familiar "Is this seat taken?"
He didn't have to look up to know who the voice belonged to.
"Hey Kev, how ya been?" Zac asked sheepishly as he pulled out the chair next to Kevin who was shocked at the gall his ex-boyfriend seemed to possess. Just as Zac got himself comfortable Kevin gathered his things and said "Actually, you can have that seat, and this one two" and quickly found the last remaining single seat at the front of the classroom.
For the next hour or so he could hardly concentrate, feeling Zac eyes practically boring holes in the back of his hair. And as hard as he tried he couldn't focus on anything that his professor had to say. Eventually, he just gave up and let his mind wander to other thoughts, happier thoughts, Mike Carden-esque thoughts. He hadn't seen Mike since the bonfire when they first met, and as much as he wanted to ask Bill about him, he was just too damned embarrassed. After all, what would a guy like Mike Carden want with him? Suddenly the sound of shuffling seats and bags brought him back to earth as he realized his lecture was done and all he wanted was to get out of the classroom with out having to speak to Zac. Luckily Zac was uncomfortably stuck speaking to a petite brunette who seemed to think that flipping her hair around was a fool proof man-catching plan. As Kevin snuck away they made eye contact one last time, Zac looking like he wanted to smother her with her shiny brown hair.
~
Upon returning to his dorm, Kevin was not surprised to find Joe and Bill playing Call of Duty on his brand new X-box, but he was infinitely shocked to find Mike Carden just sitting there on his bed as if this was a regular, every day occurrence.
"Um, hey guys. What's up?" Kevin asked uncomfortably. He desperately wanted to keep his cool around Carden, wanted to be seen as something other than Bill's geeky friend. So he figured his best bet would be to use as few words as possible.
"Fuzzy! You're back. D'ya miss me? Since you're up, can you get us some munch?"
Kevin didn't want to complain in front of Carden and the addition of Joe's pathetic "Pleeeeease Kev, I'm starrrrrving", had him instinctively reaching for the door.
Before he even got out the door he felt a warm hand on his shoulder. "I'll come with you, if you need an extra pair of hands."
The weight of Mike's hand on his shoulder felt so warm and good and right, and it took everything in his power to not lean back into Mike's chest and rest his head on Mike's shoulder.
"Sure, thanks. I'd appreciate it."
Mike held the door open for Kevin as they left and Kevin couldn't help but remember that Zac had never once held a door open for him.
~
Kevin and Mike decided to stop for lunch and bring the boys take-out in their own sweet time. Beggars can't be choosers, Kevin smugly thought to himself.
Once he finally relaxed he found that Carden was actually a really funny and smart guy, and he began to wonder about how much truth there was to all the rumours about him. Attractive, fun, mildly intimidating guys didn't just going around breaking up marriages and punching school officials, did they? Yeah, Mike was a little rough around the edges, but that didn't automatically make him an attempted arsonist, right?
As Kevin's mind continued to wander (as it was prone to doing) he could hear Mike calling his name to get his attention. "Sorry, what were you saying?" Focus, Kevin focus! Space cadets are NOT sexy!
"Actually I was wondering what exactly it was you were thinking about. It must have been riveting." Kevin may not have had all the experience in the world when it came to guys, but he was pretty sure that Mike was flirting with him.
"I was actually just, well...I was wondering about your reputation at Hollywood High," he could feel his cheeks burning bright red as he asked, feeling like maybe he had just managed to put every foot in his mouth.
"My reputation, huh?" Mike replied with a confused grin. "Wha'dya hear? That I knocked up the lunch lady and tried to blow up the science wing?"
"Actually, it was more like you had an affair with Mr. AND Mrs. Tuttle and tried to burn down the gym. Oh and you punched Principal Morton in the face."
Mike looked shocked and Kevin thought he may have even seen a flicker of sadness in his eyes, but he couldn't be sure.
"Well, I can honestly tell you that none of that shit is true. I'm really not a bad guy, my life was just kinda fucked up at the time."
Kevin was genuinely interested in what happened to Mike back then, but he didn't want to pry, and he really just wanted to lighten the mood.
"Well if you ask me, the real delinquents of H.H.S. were the Alexes. Those guys were hell on wheels."
"I know, right!" Mike exclaimed cheerfully. "Those guys were banned from metal shop, woodshop, home ec AND auto shop. I'm surprised the idiots still have 30 fingers between them."
They spent the rest of lunch talking and laughing for so long that they almost forgot to get food for the sad little gamers stuck back at the dorm.
~
Another week passed before Kevin heard from Mike again. He was starting to think that maybe Mike was just a figment of his imagination, like a unicorn or his seventh grade "girlfriend from Canada". But alas, there he was on the other end of the phone and Kevin prayed with all he had that this wasn't some sort of cruel series of dreams. So Kevin took a deep breathe and tried harder than hard to keep his cool.
"So Kevin, Bill and I were talking about you recently..." Mike's voice wandered off as if he was waiting to gauge Kevin's response, but he was met with silence. Kevin couldn't help but worry about what Bill could have been saying about him.
"Um Kevin? You still there?"
"Yeah, I'm here. So, you and Bill were talking about me?"
The trepidation in Kevin's voice was evident, as if he just waiting to be embarrassed or even worse, prematurely rejected.
"Yeah, I mean not in a gossipy way or anything, that's not really my style. He just told me that you were a big fan of Star Wars and I was just wondering if you wanted to go to Star Wars in concert. I mean, it's no big deal or anything, I just thought it might be fun or whatever."
Kevin waited a beat longer than is absolutely necessary to respond. Over eager is NOT sexy, he reminded himself.
"Tha-that sounds great!" he stammered out exuberantly. Truth be told, he really has wanted to go to see Star Wars in concert, he just figured no one else would want to.
"Awesome," Mike sounded happy, really genuinely happy and Kevin was smiling so hard his face hurt. "I'll get tickets for this Saturday."
~
Luckily for Kevin the week flew by, and with the exception of a few tense run-ins with Zac, all was going pretty darn well. Joe and Bill have made themselves a pretty well known feature around the dorms, and his other friends were starting to follow suit. He even heard someone refer to him as that "Kinda lame dude with all the cool friends". But even that couldn't bring him down. Because if it wasn't for his cool friends he wouldn't be going out on his first date with Mike Carden in a matter of hours. Come to think of it Kevin wasn't exactly sure if this was a date. He didn't want to assume, and at the end of the day he figured if you're not sure whether it's a date or not, it probably isn't. That however didn't stop Kevin from spending hour after hour trying on everything in his wardrobe to an unenthusiastic audience of Bill and Joe.
"Kev, seriously. He has seen you wearing knee-high leather boots with a hoodie. If that hasn't driven him away nothing will."
"Fuzzy Jr's right Kevin," Bill chimed in, lying sideways across Kevin's bed, letting all the blood rush to his head as a distraction. "It's Carden. It's not like he's some kinda Julio Eglesias Casanova type guy anyway. Just be your adorable little panda self and you'll have a great date."
"It's not a date" Kevin muttered under his breath. He really didn't want to get his hopes too high just to end up disappointed.
"Whatever Fuzz, you'll have a great time on your completely platonic, one-on-one evening sitting in the dark listening to the greatest music in the galaxy, literally, with a guy you wanna make babies with. But NOT a date. Got it. My bad."
Kevin just rolled his eyes and continued on searching for the perfect scarf.
"Well Kev, if your date doesn't work out-"
"It's NOT a date!"
"Whatever," Joe continued, "If your whatever Bill called it doesn't work out would you mind if I dated Carden?"
"What? You're gay, Joe?" Kevin had always had his suspicions, but he never really thought it was true.
"Me, no. Not gay, but Carden is pretty fucking cool so I'd be willing to experiment."
Bill just laughed and said "Don't let Gabe hear you say that. You'll break the poor kid's heart. I think his ultimate goal is have Joe like some sort of straight trophy token thing. He had mentioned something about schematics and duct tape, but I'm pretty sure he was joking...I think."
By this point Kevin had heard enough and Joe and Bill's help was definitely doing more harm than good.
"Okay let's get this straight. This is NOT I repeat NOT a date. Joe you're not gay, so you're not dating Mike because you think he's cool. Bill please make sure any plans your friends have to abduct my brother are thwarted"
Suddenly both Joe and Kevin's phones beeped indicating a text message. "Oh, Mike's downstairs I gotta go."
As Kevin opened the door to leave Joe shouted "Kev! Nick says good luck on your date with the convict."
Kevin slammed the door to the sounds of the boys in his room howling with laughter.
~
Star Wars in concert was better than Kevin could have even imagined. Kevin couldn't believe that Mike was as big a fan as he was. It was nice getting to know the until recently hidden geekier side of Mike. But at the end of the day Mike could still make geeky look so sexy and Kevin couldn't believe he was so lucky to be on this platonic outing with him.
During the show Mike had never tried to hold Kevin's hand, or made any other real indication that he wanted something more than friendship. While disappointed, Kevin honestly felt that having Mike as a friend was better than not having Mike in his life at all. So he settled in and enjoyed the concert the same way he would with any friend. Forcing himself to ignore the tight knot forming in his chest.
After the show Mike took Kevin to the Rainbow Bar and Grill on Sunset. It was Mike's favourite place where the likes of Guns and Roses and Motley Crue could be found in the 80's and 90's. It wasn't so crazy these days, but to Mike it was like a holy grail. Since he was a regular they didn't get carded at the door so they found a booth and Mike ordered a couple of beers.
Kevin wasn't really much of a drinker, but he wanted Mike to regard him as an equal. A man's man (who just happened to really like kissing other men). A few beers deep Kevin could feel the knot in his chest loosen as well as his tongue, he had never felt so confident around Mike as he did at that very moment, so he decided to strike up a new conversation.
"So, Mike...Carden. Should I just call you Carden? All your friends seem to and since we're friends now I guess I should too." Kevin didn't really know what he talking about, but talking to Carden just always felt great. And what felt even better was sitting next to Carden which Kevin was apparently now doing with a awkward shuffle to join Mike on his side of the booth. They were flush against on another from shoulder to foot and Kevin couldn't help but sigh.
"Kev-Kevin" Mike started "Are you drunk?"
Kevin was appalled at the insinuation "I'm not drunk, Mike, I'm just...happy. Your friendship makes me happy, you make me happy. You know, if you say happy enough times it doesn't even sound like a word anymore. Haaa-pppy, Happy, Happyyyyy."
Mike couldn't help but laugh at Kevin's antics and the way he was looking at him suddenly made that knot reappear in Kevin's chest.
"Well I gotta say, Jonas, you do make me pretty fucking happy."
Kevin looked absolutely scandalized by the compliment. "Mike, you really shouldn't swear. My mom says that people who swear are low class and I don't want her to think that about you if she ever meets you. Not that there would be any reason too, but she has met Bill and I think she has a crush on him, which is super weird and-"
And Kevin's rambling was finally brought to a halt when Mike kissed him full and strong on the mouth. Kevin's head was suddenly swimming with confusion and alcohol and Mike. How could everything he had wanted for so long finally be happening? Then there was no more time for thinking as Mike was slowly maybe even hesitantly licking Kevin's bottom lip, seeking permission that Kevin was more than happy to grant. Soon Mike was licking his way into Kevin's mouth and Kevin was incredibly thankful to be sitting down since he was sure his entire body save for his mouth was no longer working. They kissed for a while longer, Kevin's hands grabbing the edges of Mike's t-shirt, while Mike could help but muss Kevin's curls.
Their reverie was eventually broken by the simultaneous ringing of their phones. Mike's blaring out 'You're the best' by Joe Esposito (Bill), and Kevin's ringing 'Funky Cold Medina' (Joe). Without even discussing it they both hit ignore, cause in this moment right now nothing was more important than this.
~
Kissing Mike was awesome. And now that they'd been kissing for nearly a month they had gotten really really good at it. Kissing Zac was never like this cause he was just, well selfish. And kissing never just stayed kissing with Zac, and at the time Kevin was NOT ready to be felt up by anyone. Lately he'd been re-evaluating his views on the matter and whether or not he was ready for Mike to do some feeling. He knew that they needed to talk about it. Knew that Mike had way more experience than he did, I mean who wouldn't want to touch Mike? But he wasn't sure how to bring it up. He thought about talking to Bill or Joe about it first but then he remember who Bill and Joe actually were and what a bad idea that was. So far Mike had been super patient and that made Kevin want him even more. He would talk to Mike about it. Soon. Or eventually. Someday. In the meanwhile he was just happy to keep on kissing.
~
Mike was meeting Kevin after class for lunch, and as usual he was doing his damndest to avoid Zac and his increasingly aggresive and discomforting attempts at flirting. Kevin thought that maybe if he just gave Zac time to speak his piece they could both move on. He could tell Zac about Mike and the problem would be done and dusted. If he was man enough to date Mike Carden he was definitely man enough to deal with Zac Efron. So Kevin got to class early and found Zac hoping that he could clear the air.
"Hey Zac."
"Kevin, hi!" Zac sounded genuinely excited that Kevin was talking to him, but wanting to avoid mixed signals, Kevin continued.
"Um, I just wanted to say that about everything that happened senior year, no hard feelings, okay. I don't hate you, at all. In fact I don't really even think about you anymore. I'm with someone knew who I lo-, who I really like so let's just call a truce, alright?"
Zac look shocked, not only that Kevin was actually talking to him, but that he had found someone new. And Zac couldn't help but wonder if Kevin was going to say he loved this new guy.
"Look, Kev, I want to apologize for how I treated you in high school. If I had known then what I know now I would have never done it."
Curiosity got the best of Kevin and he just had to know. "You didn't know that cheating on your boyfriend was wrong? That's pathetic, Zac."
"No not that. Well yeah cheating is wrong and I always knew that, but I was too stupid to see what a great thing we had back then. I was immature and foolish and I'm sorry I hurt you. If there is anyway you could see it in your heart to forgive me, I promise I'll do better this time. What do ya say? Give me another chance?"
Kevin couldn't believe his ears, Zac was begging him to come back? Even if he was single he wouldn't consider it for.one.second.
"Sorry, Zac, but I've moved on. And you're not a part of it. Mike makes me really happy, and I wouldn't give him up for anything, but I hope you find what you're looking for."
Zac didn't seem at all pleased with that answer.
After class was done Kevin was speaking to their professor as Zac left. He saw a pretty scruffy-hot looking guy wandering around seeming pretty lost. He approached Zac curiously.
"Hey man, do you know Kevin Jonas? I was supposed to meet him here, but I can't seem to find him."
Knowing that Kevin would be stuck in class for at least another five minutes, Zac took this chance to talk to the new man in his life.
"Yeah, I know Kevin, really well, if you know what I mean. We went out in high school. Had a thing for me then and I'm pretty sure he still does. And you are?"
Mike clenched his fists and willed himself to stay calm, Kevin wouldn't appreciate Mike missing their date by kicking this guys ass and ending up in jail.
"I'm Mike, Kevin's boyfriend."
"Well, hey, Mike, I'm Zac. And Kev's just in class finishing up with Prof and he should be out any minute. Hope you have as much fun with him as I did. Between you and me, for a virgin, the kid sure knows what he doing. So slutty and pure all at the same time. He's like a male version of the Maddona-Whore complex all rolled up into one. Sorry, sometimes psych class just sticks with me. But when you're done with him, be sure to send him back my way. See ya round, Mike."
Mike just wanted to punch that shit-eating grin off of Zac's stupid pretty boy face. He really didn't know how true the things Zac said were and part of him didn't want to know. All he and Kevin had done till then was some serious making out, and Mike didn't push because he knew that Kevin was a virgin. But if what Zac was saying was true, how chaste was his new boyfriend after all? He couldn't think straight, images of Kevin and Zac invading his mind. He had to get out of there, because the last thing he wanted was to blow up at Kevin. He wanted to trust him, but he needed to take a step back. So before Kevin got a chance to see him, Mike left.
~
Mike never showed up after class, wasn't answering his phone or replying to Kevin's texts. He was starting to get worried so he called Bill at the body shop they worked at to see if he had any info.
"Mike's here at work, Fuzz, just came in about an hour ago asking to pick up an extra shift. Practically begging. Is there trouble in paradise? Cause I'm sure your Auntie Bill can help figure it out."
"This isn't a joke Bill!" Kevin yelled, and Kevin never yelled, at least not to non-sibling type people. "He was supposed to meet me here at school I'm all freaked out cause he's not answering his phone and you tell me he just bailed? Well, tell him-- actually don't tell him anything, I've got a half hour before class and I need to calm down."
Bill had never heard Kevin like that before, and as proud as he was to see some backbone, he really didn't want either of his friends hurt. So he sashayed over to Mike and just stared at his friend.
"What do you want, Beckett?" Mike only called Bill by his last name when he was in no mood to talk.
"Well, Carden, I just spoke to Fuzz-- I mean Kevin-- and he is none too pleased with you. In fact he sounded pi-issed."
"He was pissed? Well, whatever, I can't deal with him right now and his half truths."
"Mike, are you accusing Kev of lying? Cause that kid maybe many things, but a liar he ain't. Look, I'll cover your shift and you go and figure things out with your guy. Whatever it, is can't be all that bad."
Deep down Mike knew Bill was right, so he gave his friend a pat on the back, said thanks and headed back to the campus.
In the meanwhile, Kevin was nursing a coffee trying to figure out what could have possibly happened when Zac found him.
"Hey Kev, you alright? You don't look so hot. Weren't you supposed to meeting that new boyfriend of yours?"
Zac was greatful that Kevin was so wrapped up in his own thoughts so he didn't notice the smirk forming on his lips when he mentioned Mike.
"I don't know what happened, Zac. I mean everything was great and then, well, I don't know. But he seems to be avoiding me and I have no clue what I did."
Zac almost felt bad when he saw how sad Kevin was, but Kevin was fiercely loyal and Zac missed that, wanted the kind of devotion that only Kevin had ever given him back.
So he tentatively wrapped his arm around Kevin's shoulder and let Kevin rest his head. Kevin sighed and closed his eyes for a moment to collect himself. He knew he shouldn't be leaning on Zac, but he really didn't know what else to do. Unfortunately it was in that moment that Mike entered the quad and saw his boyfriend in the arms of his ex. Mike and Zac made eye contact, but Mike broke it first, deciding against speaking to Kevin, and just walking away. And Zac also kept quiet.
~
It had been a couple of days since Mike and Kevin last spoke. Neither one wanting to break their silence first. Joe called Bill, cause he couldn't take Kevin's moping anymore. And frankly he missed hanging with Bill, but it seemed to Joe that Mike must have gotten him in the divorce.
But Bill missed Joe and Kevin just as much and wouldn't abide by their friend's stupidity any longer. They just needed a plan.
~
The next day Bill spent most of the morning convincing him to drive him to Kevin's dorm so he could pick up some video games he had left behind. Mike was reluctant to say the least.
"Please Mike, Kevin won't even be there. I need to return those games to Blockbuster or they could ruin my credit rating. And that shit stays with you for years. Do you want to be the reason I can't buy my future wife and children a house? Cause you know what happens then Mike? We'll all come to live with you."
Carden rolled his eyes though he did find the scenario quite frightening. He grabbed his car keys and headed out the door with Bill trailing behind. Mike only promising to take them there if Bill shut up.
At the same time Joe was trying to get Kevin out of bed cause he had taken to bringing girls back to Kevin's room during class hours and he was really starting to miss that. He knew it was wrong, but it was also terribly convenient. Bill texted him to say that they were on their way over and all he had to do was keep Kevin in the room till they got there. So Joe sat on the bed with his big brother and drew soothing circle patterns on his back knowing that he had a hell of an afternoon in store for him. He wasn't quite sure why Kevin and Carden were fighting, but he didn't like it one bit. Mike made his brother happy, and they needed a chance to fix things. Joe was determined to see his brother happy again, and he silently prayed that this would work.
A knock on the door roused Kevin from his half-awake, half-catatonic state as Joe went to answer the door.
"I'll get it," Joe offered quickly. "It's just Bill here to pick up some games."
"Alright, well, I don't really feel like talking so just tell him I'm asleep," Kevin said while covering his head with a blanket.
Joe felt a little bit guilty for tricking his brother, but he knew it was for the best.
Mike followed listlessly behind Bill down the hall to Kevin's room.
"I don't know why I couldn't just wait in the car for you. How many games are in there?"
"Don't worry man, Kevin's not even there, I just need an extra pair of eyes to make sure I get everything back. You don't want my future family to be homeless do you?"
Mike just figured the faster they were in the faster they could leave, so he kept walking.
As Bill knocked on the door, Mike looked at him curiously since no one was supposed to be there. Before answering, Joe told Kevin he'd be right back, just running out to get some snacks.
Before Mike knew what was going on Kevin's door flew open and Bill shoved him inside as Joe ran out quickly yelling "I'm sorry guys, now fix this shit."
Kevin sat up quickly and confused, no understanding what was happening, as Mike just stood by the door bewildered.
"What the hell? Kevin? Bill said you wouldn't be here"
"Well, Joe never mentioned you were coming, so I guess the joke is on us."
Mike immidiately turned to the door and tried the doorknob, but it wouldn't budge. Suddenly they heard from outside. "Carden, Fuzz, you guys aren't getting out of there till you fix whatever the hell it is that you broke. And believe me, Joe and I can wait out here ALL day. We really have very little going on in the plans department. So getting to talking."
Mike pounded on the door a few more times for good measure, but realized that if anyone had the time to follow through on a plan as stupid as this it would be Bill and Joe.
"Wow, you really want to get away from me that badly, huh? Wish I knew what I did to cause all this grief," Kevin said blankly, not a trace of emotion in his voice.
"You know what you did, or should I say who," Mike blurted out. If he had to be stuck in here he was at least going to say his piece.
"What the hell are you even talking about, there hasn't been anyone else! Why would I want anyone else when you are ALL I EVER WANTED!"
Mike felt a rush of warmth at Kevin's words, but wasn't giving up that easily.
"What about Zac? You know, that pretty boy ex of yours?"
Kevin was shocked, this is about Zac? "What about him, we broke up before you and I even met!"
"Well according to pretty boy, you and he had some pretty fun times. Stuff you never told me about and stuff he seemed to think you would be into again."
"Whar? I don't want Zac. I barely even like the guy as a friend!"
"Well, it didn't look like that to me. I came by to meet you for lunch, but instead I ran into Zac who informed me that you guys used to be really close. Like, you did everything short of everything close. And he seemed to get off on what did he call it? Oh yeah, your 'Madonna-Whore complex'"
Kevin was livid. When he found Zac again he was going to, he was going to, well he was going to do something and it wouldn't be pleasant in the least. Revenge wasn't really his strong suit.
"So I bailed," Mike continued, "but after Bill convinced me that I was overreacting I rushed back to campus to find you, and instead I see you in his arms. Explain that to me, Kevin!"
At that moment any passive aggresive tendencies Kevin had fell away. His name and his honoured had been besmerched and he was not going to stand for it.
"For your information, Mike, Zac and I never came close to having sex. That was part of the reason why he cheated on me when we were together. I never kept him satisfied. So I don't know what you think happened between he and I but I can assure you it was nothing more than 'some making out and a few shy handjobs', his words, not mine. And what you saw was Zac comfortimg me, or at least I thought that's what he was doing, but I guess he was just causing trouble"
Mike winced at the thought of Kevin touching Zac that intimately, but he also knew that he had been played for a fool.
"Zac told me he wanted me back the same day you guys met. I told him that I was happy with you and at the very most he and I could be friends. That is it. I never led him on or gave him any indication that it could or would go any further. God, Mike, I love you, I would never do that to you."
Kevin didn't even realize what he said to Mike, he was so wound up, but Mike heard it loud and clear. "You, you love me?"
And just like that all of Kevin's worries and fears regarding Mike dissappeared. If he was going to lose him, he would at least know that he did everything in his power to fix this.
"I-I do love you Mike. And maybe it's too soon, and you probably don't feel the same, but it's true. I love you, Mike Carden. Why couldn't you just trust me instead of some guy you didn't even know?"
Mike knew that he had to tell Kevin the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. At least he didn't have to swear on a bible first.
"God Kev, I am so sorry, I just, well I just have some trust issues and I guess that's on me. But the minute I thought you were still into Zac I couldn't stand it, so I ran. I'm sorry."
Kevin softened considerably hearing this, but it wasn't quite enough. "What happened Mike? Who hurt you?"
"So obviously you've heard all the rumours about me in my senior year. That I was kicked out for being the philandering terrorist of H.H.S. but that wasn't even close to the truth." He took a deep breath closed his eyes and began.
"My senior year of high school I was seeing this guy, Jared. He was older, and cool and as far as I knew he was everything I wanted. My family was going though a hard time back then and I confided in Jared, told him everything that was happening in my life. I trusted him and he, he..."
Mike's voice trailed off and Kevin was sure he could see his eyelashes dampen as his eyes brimmed with tears. Whatever had happened to Mike must have been bad, cause Kevin had never seen him look so sad.
"My folks were fighting all the time, my dad spending too much money, going out all the time and pretty much neglecting us at home. I figured he was having an affair, but I didn't want to say anything to mom before I knew for sure. So I followed him one night after he left home and we ended up at some shitty hole in the wall motel. I waited and waited for the woman to show, but no woman ever did. Instead Jared, MY Jared pulled up and snuck away with my father."
Kevin couldn't believe what Mike was telling him, how anyone could be so cruel to their boyfriend or even worse their own child.
"I waited till they came out and confronted them." By this point Mike was sobbing, Kevin holding him tight silently reassuring him that the worst was over.
"I sat in my car crying until they final appeared holding hands and kissing as if they didn't have a care in the world. And do you know what they had the nerve to tell me? That they were in love, and that because of me they had found true happiness. Not one ounce of sorrow or regret. They said they were happy the truth was finally out so we could all be free to lead our real lives. And freedom for me meant watching my dad run off with the first guy I ever loved, and real life meant dropping out of high school in order to help support my mom and myself. The reason I never dispelled any of the rumours about me, was because the truth, the truth was so much worse."
Kevin just held Mike in his arms, not having a clue what to say. Mike had been betrayed by the people who were supposed to love him and protect him. Kevin couldn't imagine ever hurting anyone like that. Especially not Mike.
"I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you." Kevin had no other words in the moment, and really nothing else mattered.
As Mike looked up to Kevin eyes red and wet he replied "I love you too."
In that moment they took all their pain, all their frustration and worry and poured it into each other, kissing and holding one another as if they would never get another chance.
They moved roughly and quickly with little if any finesse, their kisses tasted of tears and past pain and renewed promises. Kevin moaned into Mike's mouth in a way that startled himself as much as it turned Mike on. Kevin could barely think, his need unparraled to anything he had ever felt before. And if the growing bulge in Mike's jeans was any indication Mike felt the exact same way. Their kisses continued, leading to frenzied hands searching and grabbing at a desperate pace.
Shirts and pants were discarded with such haste that they surprised themselves. Soon they were wearing only matching black boxer briefs and flushed red faces as Kevin was the first to speak. His voice out of breath as if he had just run an 8-minute mile.
“Mike…I want you. Want you inside me now. Want nothing but you right now”
Mike's body was moving light years faster than his brain, and it didn't look like he was going to catch up anytime soon. But he tried. "Kevin are you sure? We don't have to do this. Especially if you're just trying to prove something. I'm sorry about the Zac thing, but seriously we can wait."
But Kevin didn't want to wait. He was tired of waiting especially now that he knew he had found his happily ever after.
~
On the other side of the door Bill and Joe were bored. So very bored. They had played "hot hands" until they couldn't bear smacking or being smacked anymore, the tops and bottoms of their hands red and sore. They could hear them through the door before, and at first it didn't sound good. Heck, they didn't even know if these two were meant to really be together, but they at least needed a shot. Then they heard what sounded alot like sobbing which got Joe up off the floor ready to fight Carden for making his brother cry. He knew he'd never win, but he'd at least get one good shot in. But Bill held him back telling him that he was pretty sure it was Mike they were hearing, which was well, really weird.
Eventually everything got quite and for a minute Joe wondered aloud whether they had fallen asleep. It made no sense, but this really wasn't one of his more logical days anyway.
Suddenly out of the silence Bill and Joe were shocked to hear what sounded like a pained cry. Followed by several more. The cries then changed into moans and then finally whimpers before Bill stated the obvious "Um Joe, I don't think they're sleeping." Joe knew what was going on, but Bill's acknowledgement just seemed to make the whole thing worse.
"Aww, come on guys, ewww! You know we're out here." As Joe was desperately trying to figure out new places to spend his days they were greeted with the sound of laughter punctuated by Kevin yelling "Joe! Bill! Go away!". The boys were half way down the hall by the time they heard a faint "Thank you!" which they were pretty sure was Mike.
~
The next time Kevin ran into Zac he had his arm around Mike's waist, and Mike's around his own, hands stuffed obnoxiously in each other's back pockets. As they passed him Kevin considered, not acknowledging him at all, but he was raised better than that. He offered a short and disinterested "Hey Zac, what's up?" over his shoulder, not even stopping for a response. It's not like he had the time to stop anyway, he and Mike had a whole life together ahead of them.
~
THE END.