Duty Free Gift for the Traveler - Chapter 1/? Part B
Duty Free Gift for the Traveler
Chapter: 1/? Part B
Author: Sofiwick
Beta: Kodamasama (thank you so much!)
Pairings: Sam/Gabriel, Dean/Castiel.
Rating: PG-13 (it may go up in later chapters).
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. I am making no profit from this fanfiction.
Spoilers: Up until 6x22.
Warnings: undecided!Dean, hesitant!Cas, Mr. Fix-It!Sam, flirtatious!Gabriel, Bobby being Bobby.
Takes place right after 6x22, with a few changes (prepare for spoilers): Castiel kills Crowley, Sam’s Wall is still there, and Balthazar is alive.
Summary: Sam already has his hands full with Dean’s epic gay love affair with an ex-god without Gabriel suddenly deciding he wants his own slice of hot Winchester.
Part A
Sam feels the room go completely still. Gabriel is alive? The hunter didn’t see how he actually died, but Dean’s description of the whole thing was pretty clear on the fact the archangel died to help them.
“Gabriel? That Gabriel? He’s alive?” Dean asks.
“When I arrived at Purgatory’s Gates, he was there waiting for me. Gabriel said he doesn’t know how it happened, only that one moment he just ‘blinked into existence like Jack from Lost’… whatever that may mean.” The low light filtered by the curtains is enough to make out Castiel’s head tilt. Some things just don’t change, Sam supposes. “I believe it’s safe to assume my Father was responsible for this; He also engraved instructions on my brother’s Grace.”
If Sam wasn’t already awake, he’d have been soon by Dean’s raising voice. He never quite managed to keep a low tone when he was about to freak out. “What instructions? What’s Gabriel got to do with you going somewhere? You can’t leave, Cas-”
There’s despair building up in Dean’s voice, the type Sam had only heard when his brother realized the person they were trying to save wasn’t going to make it. It was in that exact moment Sam knew Dean wouldn’t let his angel go - whatever happened in the past year could just go fuck itself in the ass.
“Gabriel was instructed to hold the Gates open until I came back,” Castiel says, voice failing miserably at keeping his usual monotone. “Now he has returned to Heaven and will restore order to the Host.”
Dean snorts to show his skepticism, even though it comes out more of a hurt sound than anything else. “Oh, oh, and you’re just going to trust Gabriel with that?”
“No, that’s why I’ll be joining him in his task, together with Balthazar. I wish to make sure his intentions are pure,” Castiel says.
“Why the hell did God only resurrect Gabriel now that it’s all over, and we don’t even need him anymore?”
“I… do not know.”
Dean looks furious, but Sam knows it’s his natural reaction to heart break. “And what’s up with all this crap? You’re both Heaven’s little bitches again? You wanna serve the same douche bag that put you through all of this in the first place?”
“Serve God once more? Not at all. I am… tired, Dean. And patience is no longer a virtue I can claim I possess.”
Dean is about to protest, but the angel raises a hand to ask for his silence.
“I only came to try and explain myself once again. For some reason, the idea of leaving you with the misguided notion that-” Sam’s eyes slowly grow used to the darkness, allowing him to see without a doubt that Castiel’s arms are shaking, even if just a little. “I cannot leave before making my actions clear.
“Despite being accused by your brother of bringing him back soulless on purpose, I can assure you that was not the case. Sam is upset, and thinking I was responsible for his body… condition gives him something very much akin to cruel satisfaction… But not you, Dean. I can’t let you blame me for this too.” He hesitates before revealing, “It hurts too much.”
Dean touches his shoulder carefully, as if fearing the angel would fly off at the first brusque movement, and Cas leans into his personal space the exact way he used to - like Dean was gravity, and Cas could fight the pull no more than he could change his vessel’s eye color.
“I tried… so hard. I thought I was strong enough, that Lucifer was probably fighting Michael inside the Cage, that maybe I could even save Adam Milligan also, if I was careful enough.” Cas tells the story as if reading it from a book. Dean fists the cloth on Castiel’s arms and then releases it, only to grab it again a second later, unable to control his hands. “But Lucifer was as strong as ever, and he would not let go of Sam even if it cost him his life. I almost had my wings ripped apart when I finally banished Lucifer out of your brother’s body. However, before I took flight, Michael grabbed Sam’s leg-”
“He grab- What?” Both Winchesters are shocked.
“Yes, I was confused also. Yet a second later, he just… released it.” Castiel takes a deep breath. “At the time, my Grace was bleeding out of this vessel, and both my brothers were trying to prevent me from leaving the Cage; I believe they knew it wouldn’t be long before I was too weak to take the long flight out of Hell with my damaged wings.
“I flew as fast as I could, feeling victorious as I held Sam’s body in my arms. I didn’t give Michael much thought.” Castiel sighs regretfully. “When I realized my mistake, it was already too late. I waited for Sam to seek you out on his own, but when he finally did, nothing happened. Sam only stared at you outside the house you were living in.”
“Lisa’s?” Dean asks perplexed.
Castiel nods. “He looked… different and wrong. Of course, I also hadn’t realized he was soulless. I only thought that… I don’t know what I thought.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? Sam was out there doing shit, Cas, and you didn’t have the decency to stop by and let me know?”
This seems to get a reaction out of the angel. Castiel lightly pushes Dean back - the notion that this creature could punch his brother to Germany if he was in the mood terrifies Sam.
“And tell you what? That you had to be miserable again and take care of the abomination that was your soulless brother? So that you could then hate me for my incompetence at making you happy, all because I was too selfish to accept you were already happy without me?”
Dean takes a step back. Castiel takes one forward. “Cas… What’re you talking about? Just, slow down-”
“I love Sam. I do. The entire time I fought to free him from Hell I kept telling myself I was doing it for him - and ultimately you. But now I see I was doing it for myself.”
The angel grabs Dean’s arms so the hunter can’t step away again, pulling him closer. Sam sighs. It’s official, they’re both talking about a person they completely forgot was in the room with them.
“You were somewhat happy, Dean, and I had no place in your new life. I couldn’t demand you to give it all up so you’d make my problems your own and live a miserable life on the road without your brother. But if Sam came back for you…”
The shape in the darkness that Sam assumes is his brother tries unsuccessfully to free himself from the angel‘s grasp, much like a shitty movie damsel who yells, ‘no’ before pulling the other character in for a kiss. They both stop to contemplate the almost nonexistent space between their lips, Dean‘s ragged breath filling up the room. Which is just fantastic - Dean getting aroused by being manhandled by Castiel is the cherry on top of Sam’s surreal life.
“I watched you, at least in the beginning before my confrontation with Raphael. You smiled, but it never reached your eyes. You acted like you always do, and yet your actions were shallow and your words devoid of your usual passion.” Castiel strokes the side of the hunter’s face lightly, letting his hand fall away when it reaches his chin. “I suspected that perhaps you weren’t as happy as we both believed you to be. But again, I had nothing to offer you. So I- I convinced myself I was helping free you from a dull life without hunting and without Sam.”
Castiel lets go of Dean completely but remains inside his personal space.
“Now I see I might have deceived myself into believing this. Maybe you were truly happy, and I just couldn’t accept it,” the angel says, finally.
And now it’s over. Castiel had explained his side of the story, although at three in the morning when they’re all so tired Sam can’t even bring himself to come up with a metaphor as to how much. The angel can be on his way before anyone can think of stopping him.
“I wasn’t…” Dean almost sobs and it breaks Sam’s heart, “I wasn’t, like… truly happy, or some shit like that. I was so dead, Cas. Thinking Sammy was in hell, what they could be doing to him-”
His voice dies down.
Sam knows how that feels - knowing with absolute certainty your brother’s in Hell while you’re powerless to help him, always wondering what horrifying creatures were doing to him and never getting an answer.
“But it wasn’t just him,” Dean continues. “I missed you, you know? Ben is amazing; I really wish he was my kid… but he isn’t. A-and Lisa! She’s just… not you. Don’t even ask me how the fuck that happened, but I just wanted you so bad, Cas! To pray for you and hit the road and just… have you. But I promised Sam I would stay at Lisa’s to play house, and you had your own stuff-”
Castiel’s lips prevent Dean from babbling on further, and Sam loves him for it. Anyone who can shut Dean Winchester up deserves respect.
Sam closes his eyes, caught by surprise at how natural it feels to be in the room while his brother gently kisses Castiel. He never felt comfortable seeing his brother get the girl at the end of the day - hell, he can’t even keep a straight face when a gay couple kisses on TV. Yet, somehow, this moment feels right. Probably because Castiel is family, and he just witnessed with his own eyes how much Dean wanted him to stay that way.
He opens his eyes, amazed at his own thoughts. Cas is still family…
Cold, horrible regret wraps itself around Sam’s chest. Dean hadn’t been happy with Lisa, hadn’t loved her, hadn’t wanted a life with her. He’d been in love with Castiel the entire time. When had he even figured that one out? How come Sam dismissed all evidences of their feelings for each other as brotherly love, tucking away their interaction as a slight attraction that meant nothing and would lead nowhere?
God, his brother is in love.
With his male angel.
Dean’s angel. There was never any doubt in his mind that, even if his brother denies Castiel being his angel, Dean is certainly Castiel’s human.
And Sam is the stupid, screw-up brother who sent Dean to live with the wrong person. The sudden urge to fix everything almost makes Sam jump from his bed and hold on to Dean like a needy child crushing a teddy bear to his chest. It’s a good thing he doesn’t, though, since his brother would probably have a big gay freak out right after finally growing some balls to confess feelings - merciful God, feelings - for his angel.
“What about Sam?” Castiel steps back to ask.
“What about Sammy?” Dean pulls him to his chest again like that answers it.
What about him indeed. You know, the guy everyone talks about but no one seems to remember exists, all at the same time.
“What if he doesn’t want me here? After everything that’s happened, I can’t blame him,” the angel is gasping, overwhelmed by the intimacy of Dean’s lips. “I don’t want him to hate me-”
It isn’t the brotherly love confession from earlier, nor the long explanation on how his body came to be soulless - hell, not even the fact the angel will finally make his brother happy, and Dean fucking deserves it. It’s that sentence right there, muffled by kisses and carrying so much fear, that wins Sam over.
“It’s gonna be fine, Cas.” Dean laughs fondly. “We’ll talk to him; of course he wants you to stay.”
And Sam does. He just wants all the hurt to be over…
“Tell Gabriel it’s gonna be a half-period gig, ‘kay?” The shape of hands in the dark caress Castiel’s face with care. “Can you do that, Cas? Leave the manual labor to Gabe and get a desk job or something?”
The angel is apparently too dazzled to try and figure out what all that means. “I don’t understand…”
“Cas.” The angel is encircled by strong arms in a desperately tight embrace. Dean’s voice is breathless and deep, travelling easily around the room to Sam’s ears. “Stay with me.”
It could have been a request, a suggestion, or even an order, but Sam hears it as the plea it really is; so does Cas. “Yes.” The sound of a low, needy moan and the outline of Dean’s hands squeezing his angel’s arms are strong indications Castiel is an enthusiastic kisser, like a kid who had a taste of a delicious candy and now can’t settle for only one. “Yes, Dean,” Cas whispers again, planting wet, sloppy kisses on the hunter’s lips, ripping out desperate little gasps from Dean that reveal just how much he really wants the angel to stay.
Despite the red painting his cheeks, Sam smiles under the covers. Who needed television when you could just watch the epic gay love story of an angel and his human?
Dean finally palms Castiel’s face to rest their foreheads together for what had to be one of the most romantic gestures he had ever witnessed his brother partaking in.
Dean has Sam, Dean has Cas, and the world is - relatively - saved. Everyone can finally be gay and happy, with the exception of Sam who is neither of those things and needs to buy popcorn for the next episode of the soul opera he titled ‘Destiel’. Gabriel will keep Heaven under control and Cas, sweetly naive Cas, ex- soul addict Cas, will make it all possible.
The hunter steals one more heated kiss before letting go.
“See, Cas, we don’t walk out on family.”
*º*º*
Chapter 2