Im doing my time line ( Read more... )

Why is it you cant see what’s right in front of you, till its too late or you think you don’t have a chance anymore? So well in a few hours I might get to see one of those guys who just makes you wanna be a better person. OK so that’s lame but he makes me smile and he sorta gets me or well so far. I really don’t know if he is gonna come but if he ( Read more... )

So Control is so powerful when you really get down to it. I mean payback is a bitch and what goes around comes around. The fact that ive learned to play the game has made me understand how control over ones emotions can really make you see what kind of person you are under it all. Funny how that works... I know who i am and who i think i am are 2 ( Read more... )

I tried not to think about him at all and sorta just let it go because ill see him in a week atleast but i might get to see him tomorrow night which makes me be a little girl about it all... Just being in his arms would take care of all sexual frustration for a while. I mean he is so sweet and honest about how he feels, its kinda nice i dont have ( Read more... )

Procrastination is the one think about my self that scares me. Some how I can pull it off but I always flip out about everything else around me. So I went though with the surgery and it really wasn’t that bad it just am sick of surgery. I fucking hate Pre-op because it scares the liven shit out of me and I found out after it was all said and done I ( Read more... )

So its a new start... on i guess life! So i started college today and it wasnt that bad. Im doing the whole 16 weeks of work in 8 weeks because of the whole 2nd fall smester. I mean its gonna be hard but i love haven something to bust my ass at all for me. As anyone knows i love projects and there was a new one waiting for me when i got home... ( Read more... )

So i was thinking about it not to long ago while spending time with someone who at one time was my best friend now thinking god i wish i smoked or had a reason to just step out side and take a break. Ive had that cross my mind a few times it seems like lately. Anyways then as i sat there trying not to be upset i was thinking your not to think you ( Read more... )

I guess i expected it to hurt alot more but it really doesnt. I mean dont get me wrong it makes me so sick that i just wanna curl up and be on some good drugs to make it all pass. But i mean it could be alot worse i could find out years from now that its not ment to be and that im not good enough. WAIT a min, i keep saying im not good enough when ( Read more... )

OK so it didnt go SO bad. It was weird i was really just shy and just sitting there thinking how the fuck did i get talked into this. Nate was set up with christine so i guess i had to go but i really didnt think i was to the point of needing to date again... i still sit here and think of it as cheating when it sure as hell isnt. I mean we are over ( Read more... )

Im in so much pain i get up thinking ok can i make it down stairs my self or do i just call mom to bring me more drugs. I had such my clots to the point i passed out cold because it hurt so bad. I guess just being this sick and trying not to think of the pain has made it worse. All i want is him to be here, here with me... No one else but me! But ( Read more... )