Just One Word: Bargain
Detective!Verse AU
“You see him?” Detective Dean Winchester asked, looking around the dumpster only to jerk back as a burst of gunfire pinged off the ground dangerously close to him.
“Not exactly.” Detective Lucas “Cas” Devine leaned back against the dumpster, breathing hard. “You had to insult one of the biggest mobsters in Chicago. What is wrong with you?”
“He started it!”
Cas glared and Dean glared back. Taking a deep breath, he tried to think of a way out of this. Alistair was the last of an old breed of Chicago gangster, the kind that liked to use AK-47s and cut fingers off people who owed him money. They had good evidence that could have used to arrest him except Dean had shot his mouth off and now they were getting shot at.
“You know I hate you right now,” Cas muttered as another round of fire bounced off the asphalt.
“You’ll forgive me. Look, we can make it to that car and then get in that backdoor there.” Dean pointed to the car in question which already had a few bullet holes in it.
“That car won’t hold up to AK-47 rounds,” Cas hissed. “We need another plan.”
“I’m all ears, Chuckles. Not that there’s anything wrong with my plan.” Dean muttered the last part under his breath. Cas was pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to hear that.
There was a lot wrong with his plan in Cas’ mind. The first part was leaving cover for something with bullet holes in it. The second was taking on Alistair’s men with just two police issue handguns. They didn’t even have vests on. This was supposed to be just a friendly chat. He was going to kill Dean for his mouth. If Alistair didn’t kill them first.
“Look, the dumpster’s our best cover. Let’s see if we can call Alistair out to talk.” Cas dug in his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. “You keep your mouth shut this time.”
“Wow, you almost told me to shut up. I’m impressed.”
Cas glared, but didn’t give in to actually saying “shut up” even though he was tempted. He dialed and waited, listening to it ring over the occasional stream of bullets.
“Detective,” Alistair said when he answered, sounding bored. “How nice of you to call. I hope you’re well today.”
“Besides the occasional spray of bullets, I’m doing fine,” Cas said. “I was hoping you could do something about that.”
“Hmmm.” Alistair went silent as he considered this.
What’s going on? What’s he saying? Dean mouthed, leaning in to listen in on the conversation.
Cas leaned back to get away, but had to duck back as more bullets came at him. Be patient.
Dean rolled his eyes, but Alistair was talking again so Cas had to listen.
“Is Detective Winchester willing to apologize?”
“Probably not,” Cas sighed.
“Well then, there’s nothing I can do for you.”
“Wait, wait!”
“Yes?”
“Wait, wait,” Cas said quickly. “How about we make a trade?”
Alistair chuckled, “What could you have that could possibly interest me, Detective?”
“You let us walk away from this and I’ll turn over our evidence to you.”
“What?!” Dean lunged for the phone, “What the hell is wrong with you man?”
“I’m saving our lives,” Cas hissed, holding him off with an arm.
“You said those rumors about you being dirty were rumors!”
“Oh my, that’s quite the offer, Detective. And I can see your partner doesn’t like it much.”
Cas could tell from Alistair’s tone that this amused the mobster and Dean was pretty pissed. He didn’t think what his partner had just suggested was anatomically possible but it wasn’t like they had many options. They trapped where they were, under fire and every other option they had was suicide.
“He’ll forgive me,” Cas muttered. “Look, it’s either we make a trade or I hang up and call for ESU and you end up under arrest anyway. Do we have a deal?”
“Hmmm,” Alistair hummed into the phone.
Cas sent a quick prayer heavenward, asking to get out of this alive, for Alistair to say yes, stop shooting and give them a chance to run for their lives. He had no actual intention of turning over evidence to the mobster, but he wasn’t going to reveal that while still on the phone with him.
“I don’t think that deal will work for me, detective. Here’s what I want. Your partner. Alone.”
Cas looked over at Dean, who was still fuming at him. Alistair’s obsession with Dean made him nervous. He didn’t know why the mobster was fascinated with his partner but it worried him because Dean seemed to be just as fascinated with Alistair.
“I don’t think so.”
“I don’t think you have a choice, detective. My men are getting closer and they’re very heavily armed.”
“Damn it.” Cas snapped his phone closed and looked over at Dean, who had an eyebrow raised. When Cas swore his partner knew it was serious.
“They’re coming for us.” Cas paused. “For you, actually.”
“Well, I’m just Mr. Popular today aren’t I?”
Cas glared. “You need to take this seriously, Dean.”
“And end up with frown lines like yours? I don’t think so.”
Taking a deep breath, Cas counted to ten, trying to control his temper. Being shot at and having his partner joke around did not help him stay calm and level headed. He really hated getting shot at which seemed to happen more often now that he was partnered with Dean.
“Look, we know they’re coming for us, we can be ready,” Dean said. “Alistair always gives away more than he thinks he does.”
“How are we going to stand up against AK-47s? We don’t even have vests on.”
“You need to start thinking positive. We’ve got the element of surprise.”
“What are you thinking?”
“You’ll see, give me your coat.”
“My coat?”
“Cas, just do it!”
Cas started counting again as he shrugged out of his coat and handed it over to Dean who shrugged out of his own leather coat and tested its weight.
“Alright, here’s what we’re going to do we’re going to leave the coats where they can see them and climb in.”
“Into the dumpster?” Cas was incredulous. The smell of it was almost overpowering and they were just hiding behind it.
“They’ll never expect us to actually go in,” Dean continued to arraigning his jacket so it looked like he was still in it. “They come for us, we jump out and surprises him.”
Cas made a face, partly horrified and partly resigned to his fate. It wasn’t a terrible plan, actually. It was better than the other plans they had tried so far. He imagined the look his dry cleaner would give him when he dropped off his suit. The bill would probably be outrageous too. He sighed, Dean was hard on his wardrobe.
“Okay, there, that’ll work.” Dean said when he finished setting up his and Cas’ coats. He carefully inched his way up and then pulled himself into the dumpster like he’d done it hundreds of times before.
“God help me,” Cas whispered to himself and then followed, less smoothly. He landed in something slimy and stinky and he gritted his teeth, trying to breathe through his mouth instead of his nose.
Dean snorted out a laugh. “You would have won gold, but you didn’t stick the landing man. Russian judge gave you an 8.5.”
“Don’t start,” Cas grumbled as he tried to get his feet under him. It was hard with whatever he had landed on sliding around and shifting constantly.
“Hey, don’t get mad at me. I gave you a 9.6.”
He glared at his partner as he finally managed to get upright and stable. The dumpster stunk. He had been in a lot of bad places, seen a lot of bad things and even smelled them too, but this was a new horror. He was never going to forget this smell. He prayed there was a way for him to get the smell out of his clothes and his skin. He wasn’t even going to think about his hair.
“Lucky me,” he muttered.
“Quiet, they’re here.”
The both ducked down lower, closer to the smell and Cas went to breathing through his teeth. He waited for whatever cue Dean was going to give. There wasn’t one. Dean was standing next to him one second and then he was up and over the edge. Cas rolled his eyes and jumped out after him.
Or he would have jumped out if he hadn’t slipped on something when making the leap. His sense of balance warned him just a second before he fell backwards and landed heavily in something that squished underneath him and wet seeped through his shirt.
He thought about swearing, but he bit his lip and just hauled himself up again. He didn’t want to know what he landed in. He wasn’t going to look, he wasn’t even going to acknowledge that he had landed in something. He was going to ignore it and make it over that edge.
There were sounds of fighting outside the dumpster. Dean was getting his ass kicked if the sounds were anything to go by and he needed backup. Cas grabbed the edge of the dumpster with his hand this time before hauling himself up. He vaulted over the side and came down hard on the guy punching Dean while his buddy held him.
“Took you freakin’ long enough!” Dean slammed his head into the nose of the guy behind him, then elbowed him in the gut.
Cas twisted the other guy’s arm behind his back in a hold and then drew his gun, pressing the barrel between his shoulder blades. “You’re under arrest. Now do yourself a favor and don’t test my patience.”
Dean subdued the other suspect and then grabbed both AK-47s from the ground. He looked pleased with himself and his plan. Cas, however, was not happy.
“Can we please call for back-up now?”
"Why? Things are just started to get fun." Dean slammed the butt of the AK-47 into the second gunman's head, making him slump and stop struggling against Cas' hold. "Come on, let's go have a chat with Alistair." Dean tossed him the second assault rifle and Cas caught it out of reflex instead of actually wanting to go.
"Are you insane?" Cas asked redundantly, "We are not going to storm Alistair's building."
"Why not? How many other guys with big guns can he have?"
"He's a mob boss, quite a few!" Cas yanked his phone out of his pocket and started dialing. "I'm calling the Captain."
"Hey! Come on, Bobby doesn't need to know about this! Jeeze, always ruining my fun."
Cas glared at his partner and didn't say anything until his Captain picked up. After explaining the situation, he had to hold the phone away from his ear.
"You morons did what?!"
"Captain, I..."
"Don't Captain me, you two were supposed to talk to him! Not start World War Three on Lower Whacker drive. Idiots. Don't have any more bright ideas, SWAT will be there in fifteen minutes."
There was a sharp CLICK! and the line went dead. Very patiently, Cas flipped his phone closed and looked at Dean with a deep scowl.
"What? He called us both idiots. Clearly, you share some of the blame."
"You are so..." Cas took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Don't have any more ideas. Let's just wait for SWAT and not get into anymore trouble okay?"
"I don't think that's possible, Cas."
"Dean, please, just try."
"No, look."
"You really should listen to your partner."
Cas paused and then turned around. Alistair stood behind them, causally picking his nails clean with a long bladed knife. This was not good. Alistair was notorious in Chicago's underground as a man who liked to get his hands bloody.
"Oh, don't look so surprised Detective. You're not the only one who can set up an ambush."
Cas and Dean leveled their AK-47s at Alistair who laughed.
"Go ahead, pull the trigger. I'll wait."
Dean glanced at him and then opened fire. He would have, except when he pulled the trigger the gun click, click, click-ed. The clip was empty.
"Damn it!" Dean tossed the gun away.
"Language, Dean, language." Alistair tsked. "This was fun, really it was, but I think it's time for us to go."
"I'm not going anywhere with you," Dean snapped. "You can go fuck yourself."
"I'm sorry to hear you say that. Now, remember, you brought this on yourself."
Alistair snapped his fingers and went back to idly cleaning his finger nails. Cas inched closer to Dean, licking his lips, wondering what Alistair had planned.
Two men came up behind the mob boss, holding up another man who was a mess of bruises, dried blood and dirt. Cas had no idea who he was until Dean sucked in a breath.
"Sam!" Dean started forward, but Cas grabbed his shoulder to hold him back.
"Your poor brother, he owes me," Alistair chuckled. "A lot of money. Didn't you teach him to just say no to drugs?"
"You let my brother go, you son of a bitch or I'll splatter your brains all over this alley." Dean struggled against his hold, but Cas was stronger than he looked.
"Do that and my boys will just have to kill your brother. You wouldn't want that now would you?"
Dean growled, "What do you want?"
"Very simple, Dean my boy. I want a trade."
"Dean..." Cas said. He knew where this was going.
"You for your brother. All debts free and clear. I'll even pay his way through rehab." Alistair smiled, "What do you say, Detective?"
“Deal.”
“Dean!”
“Wonderful.”
The two men holding Sam shoved the man forward and Dean jerked his shoulder free to catch his brother before he hit the ground. Cas came forward too, getting underneath Sam’s other arm. He could tell the shoulder he was under was dislocated but Sam didn’t even make a sound.
“You take care of my brother, you hear me?” Dean said, looking around Sam at him.
“You can’t do this.”
“He’s my brother, yeah I can.” Dean licked his lips, “I’ll be fine. In a few hours, I’ll call you to come pick me up. Just make sure he gets to a hospital. And careful, he’s heavy.”
Dean slipped out from under Sam and Cas was left with the full dead weight of Sam’s body. He staggered a step, but stayed upright. The best he could do was watch, glaring, while Dean went over and stood between the two lackies Alistair had brought with him.
“Nice doing business with you, Detective.” Alistair saluted him with the knife. “Have a lovely day.”
When SWAT arrived, Cas was still standing there with Sam but Dean, Alistair and the goons were gone without a trace.
“You see him?” Detective Dean Winchester asked, looking around the dumpster only to jerk back as a burst of gunfire pinged off the ground dangerously close to him.
“Not exactly.” Detective Lucas “Cas” Devine leaned back against the dumpster, breathing hard. “You had to insult one of the biggest mobsters in Chicago. What is wrong with you?”
“He started it!”
Cas glared and Dean glared back. Taking a deep breath, he tried to think of a way out of this. Alistair was the last of an old breed of Chicago gangster, the kind that liked to use AK-47s and cut fingers off people who owed him money. They had good evidence that could have used to arrest him except Dean had shot his mouth off and now they were getting shot at.
“You know I hate you right now,” Cas muttered as another round of fire bounced off the asphalt.
“You’ll forgive me. Look, we can make it to that car and then get in that backdoor there.” Dean pointed to the car in question which already had a few bullet holes in it.
“That car won’t hold up to AK-47 rounds,” Cas hissed. “We need another plan.”
“I’m all ears, Chuckles. Not that there’s anything wrong with my plan.” Dean muttered the last part under his breath. Cas was pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to hear that.
There was a lot wrong with his plan in Cas’ mind. The first part was leaving cover for something with bullet holes in it. The second was taking on Alistair’s men with just two police issue handguns. They didn’t even have vests on. This was supposed to be just a friendly chat. He was going to kill Dean for his mouth. If Alistair didn’t kill them first.
“Look, the dumpster’s our best cover. Let’s see if we can call Alistair out to talk.” Cas dug in his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. “You keep your mouth shut this time.”
“Wow, you almost told me to shut up. I’m impressed.”
Cas glared, but didn’t give in to actually saying “shut up” even though he was tempted. He dialed and waited, listening to it ring over the occasional stream of bullets.
“Detective,” Alistair said when he answered, sounding bored. “How nice of you to call. I hope you’re well today.”
“Besides the occasional spray of bullets, I’m doing fine,” Cas said. “I was hoping you could do something about that.”
“Hmmm.” Alistair went silent as he considered this.
What’s going on? What’s he saying? Dean mouthed, leaning in to listen in on the conversation.
Cas leaned back to get away, but had to duck back as more bullets came at him. Be patient.
Dean rolled his eyes, but Alistair was talking again so Cas had to listen.
“Is Detective Winchester willing to apologize?”
“Probably not,” Cas sighed.
“Well then, there’s nothing I can do for you.”
“Wait, wait!”
“Yes?”
“Wait, wait,” Cas said quickly. “How about we make a trade?”
Alistair chuckled, “What could you have that could possibly interest me, Detective?”
“You let us walk away from this and I’ll turn over our evidence to you.”
“What?!” Dean lunged for the phone, “What the hell is wrong with you man?”
“I’m saving our lives,” Cas hissed, holding him off with an arm.
“You said those rumors about you being dirty were rumors!”
“Oh my, that’s quite the offer, Detective. And I can see your partner doesn’t like it much.”
Cas could tell from Alistair’s tone that this amused the mobster and Dean was pretty pissed. He didn’t think what his partner had just suggested was anatomically possible but it wasn’t like they had many options. They trapped where they were, under fire and every other option they had was suicide.
“He’ll forgive me,” Cas muttered. “Look, it’s either we make a trade or I hang up and call for ESU and you end up under arrest anyway. Do we have a deal?”
“Hmmm,” Alistair hummed into the phone.
Cas sent a quick prayer heavenward, asking to get out of this alive, for Alistair to say yes, stop shooting and give them a chance to run for their lives. He had no actual intention of turning over evidence to the mobster, but he wasn’t going to reveal that while still on the phone with him.
“I don’t think that deal will work for me, detective. Here’s what I want. Your partner. Alone.”
Cas looked over at Dean, who was still fuming at him. Alistair’s obsession with Dean made him nervous. He didn’t know why the mobster was fascinated with his partner but it worried him because Dean seemed to be just as fascinated with Alistair.
“I don’t think so.”
“I don’t think you have a choice, detective. My men are getting closer and they’re very heavily armed.”
“Damn it.” Cas snapped his phone closed and looked over at Dean, who had an eyebrow raised. When Cas swore his partner knew it was serious.
“They’re coming for us.” Cas paused. “For you, actually.”
“Well, I’m just Mr. Popular today aren’t I?”
Cas glared. “You need to take this seriously, Dean.”
“And end up with frown lines like yours? I don’t think so.”
Taking a deep breath, Cas counted to ten, trying to control his temper. Being shot at and having his partner joke around did not help him stay calm and level headed. He really hated getting shot at which seemed to happen more often now that he was partnered with Dean.
“Look, we know they’re coming for us, we can be ready,” Dean said. “Alistair always gives away more than he thinks he does.”
“How are we going to stand up against AK-47s? We don’t even have vests on.”
“You need to start thinking positive. We’ve got the element of surprise.”
“What are you thinking?”
“You’ll see, give me your coat.”
“My coat?”
“Cas, just do it!”
Cas started counting again as he shrugged out of his coat and handed it over to Dean who shrugged out of his own leather coat and tested its weight.
“Alright, here’s what we’re going to do we’re going to leave the coats where they can see them and climb in.”
“Into the dumpster?” Cas was incredulous. The smell of it was almost overpowering and they were just hiding behind it.
“They’ll never expect us to actually go in,” Dean continued to arraigning his jacket so it looked like he was still in it. “They come for us, we jump out and surprises him.”
Cas made a face, partly horrified and partly resigned to his fate. It wasn’t a terrible plan, actually. It was better than the other plans they had tried so far. He imagined the look his dry cleaner would give him when he dropped off his suit. The bill would probably be outrageous too. He sighed, Dean was hard on his wardrobe.
“Okay, there, that’ll work.” Dean said when he finished setting up his and Cas’ coats. He carefully inched his way up and then pulled himself into the dumpster like he’d done it hundreds of times before.
“God help me,” Cas whispered to himself and then followed, less smoothly. He landed in something slimy and stinky and he gritted his teeth, trying to breathe through his mouth instead of his nose.
Dean snorted out a laugh. “You would have won gold, but you didn’t stick the landing man. Russian judge gave you an 8.5.”
“Don’t start,” Cas grumbled as he tried to get his feet under him. It was hard with whatever he had landed on sliding around and shifting constantly.
“Hey, don’t get mad at me. I gave you a 9.6.”
He glared at his partner as he finally managed to get upright and stable. The dumpster stunk. He had been in a lot of bad places, seen a lot of bad things and even smelled them too, but this was a new horror. He was never going to forget this smell. He prayed there was a way for him to get the smell out of his clothes and his skin. He wasn’t even going to think about his hair.
“Lucky me,” he muttered.
“Quiet, they’re here.”
The both ducked down lower, closer to the smell and Cas went to breathing through his teeth. He waited for whatever cue Dean was going to give. There wasn’t one. Dean was standing next to him one second and then he was up and over the edge. Cas rolled his eyes and jumped out after him.
Or he would have jumped out if he hadn’t slipped on something when making the leap. His sense of balance warned him just a second before he fell backwards and landed heavily in something that squished underneath him and wet seeped through his shirt.
He thought about swearing, but he bit his lip and just hauled himself up again. He didn’t want to know what he landed in. He wasn’t going to look, he wasn’t even going to acknowledge that he had landed in something. He was going to ignore it and make it over that edge.
There were sounds of fighting outside the dumpster. Dean was getting his ass kicked if the sounds were anything to go by and he needed backup. Cas grabbed the edge of the dumpster with his hand this time before hauling himself up. He vaulted over the side and came down hard on the guy punching Dean while his buddy held him.
“Took you freakin’ long enough!” Dean slammed his head into the nose of the guy behind him, then elbowed him in the gut.
Cas twisted the other guy’s arm behind his back in a hold and then drew his gun, pressing the barrel between his shoulder blades. “You’re under arrest. Now do yourself a favor and don’t test my patience.”
Dean subdued the other suspect and then grabbed both AK-47s from the ground. He looked pleased with himself and his plan. Cas, however, was not happy.
“Can we please call for back-up now?”
"Why? Things are just started to get fun." Dean slammed the butt of the AK-47 into the second gunman's head, making him slump and stop struggling against Cas' hold. "Come on, let's go have a chat with Alistair." Dean tossed him the second assault rifle and Cas caught it out of reflex instead of actually wanting to go.
"Are you insane?" Cas asked redundantly, "We are not going to storm Alistair's building."
"Why not? How many other guys with big guns can he have?"
"He's a mob boss, quite a few!" Cas yanked his phone out of his pocket and started dialing. "I'm calling the Captain."
"Hey! Come on, Bobby doesn't need to know about this! Jeeze, always ruining my fun."
Cas glared at his partner and didn't say anything until his Captain picked up. After explaining the situation, he had to hold the phone away from his ear.
"You morons did what?!"
"Captain, I..."
"Don't Captain me, you two were supposed to talk to him! Not start World War Three on Lower Whacker drive. Idiots. Don't have any more bright ideas, SWAT will be there in fifteen minutes."
There was a sharp CLICK! and the line went dead. Very patiently, Cas flipped his phone closed and looked at Dean with a deep scowl.
"What? He called us both idiots. Clearly, you share some of the blame."
"You are so..." Cas took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Don't have any more ideas. Let's just wait for SWAT and not get into anymore trouble okay?"
"I don't think that's possible, Cas."
"Dean, please, just try."
"No, look."
"You really should listen to your partner."
Cas paused and then turned around. Alistair stood behind them, causally picking his nails clean with a long bladed knife. This was not good. Alistair was notorious in Chicago's underground as a man who liked to get his hands bloody.
"Oh, don't look so surprised Detective. You're not the only one who can set up an ambush."
Cas and Dean leveled their AK-47s at Alistair who laughed.
"Go ahead, pull the trigger. I'll wait."
Dean glanced at him and then opened fire. He would have, except when he pulled the trigger the gun click, click, click-ed. The clip was empty.
"Damn it!" Dean tossed the gun away.
"Language, Dean, language." Alistair tsked. "This was fun, really it was, but I think it's time for us to go."
"I'm not going anywhere with you," Dean snapped. "You can go fuck yourself."
"I'm sorry to hear you say that. Now, remember, you brought this on yourself."
Alistair snapped his fingers and went back to idly cleaning his finger nails. Cas inched closer to Dean, licking his lips, wondering what Alistair had planned.
Two men came up behind the mob boss, holding up another man who was a mess of bruises, dried blood and dirt. Cas had no idea who he was until Dean sucked in a breath.
"Sam!" Dean started forward, but Cas grabbed his shoulder to hold him back.
"Your poor brother, he owes me," Alistair chuckled. "A lot of money. Didn't you teach him to just say no to drugs?"
"You let my brother go, you son of a bitch or I'll splatter your brains all over this alley." Dean struggled against his hold, but Cas was stronger than he looked.
"Do that and my boys will just have to kill your brother. You wouldn't want that now would you?"
Dean growled, "What do you want?"
"Very simple, Dean my boy. I want a trade."
"Dean..." Cas said. He knew where this was going.
"You for your brother. All debts free and clear. I'll even pay his way through rehab." Alistair smiled, "What do you say, Detective?"
“Deal.”
“Dean!”
“Wonderful.”
The two men holding Sam shoved the man forward and Dean jerked his shoulder free to catch his brother before he hit the ground. Cas came forward too, getting underneath Sam’s other arm. He could tell the shoulder he was under was dislocated but Sam didn’t even make a sound.
“You take care of my brother, you hear me?” Dean said, looking around Sam at him.
“You can’t do this.”
“He’s my brother, yeah I can.” Dean licked his lips, “I’ll be fine. In a few hours, I’ll call you to come pick me up. Just make sure he gets to a hospital. And careful, he’s heavy.”
Dean slipped out from under Sam and Cas was left with the full dead weight of Sam’s body. He staggered a step, but stayed upright. The best he could do was watch, glaring, while Dean went over and stood between the two lackies Alistair had brought with him.
“Nice doing business with you, Detective.” Alistair saluted him with the knife. “Have a lovely day.”
When SWAT arrived, Cas was still standing there with Sam but Dean, Alistair and the goons were gone without a trace.