Title: Dysrhythmia
Rating: PG
Pairing: Gen, ft. Itachi, Sasuke
Length: 823
Summary: Itachi's final thoughts at the end of the line. Unbeta'd.
A/N: borne out of my wondering how Itachi died quite so... "on cue."
HE'S HAVING A HEART ATTACK, that much he's sure of. His heart lurches frantically in the cavity of his chest, the rhythm coming undone like a ball of string pulled apart. The electric synchronicity that it has maintained all his life is falling out of step, the little electrical charges of his cells fighting each other. Instead of beating all together, they are now marching to their own beat.
It's unexpectedly painful- it feels like a giant's red hot hand has grasped his heart and squeezed. In front of him, Sasuke pulls some exploding tags out and hurls them. Itachi grits his teeth and shields himself, takes another step.
He has no chakra left, just like Sasuke has no chakra left. He's holding the Susano'o together with nothing but sheer, stubborn willpower. It is all he has left, the knowledge that in less than a minute, the ancient power can pass to Sasuke, and he'll be dead. He just has to make it that far. This knowledge that it's only a few more seconds, minutes, hopefully not more, (he's so dizzy) is powering Susano'o- his sheer belief is keeping up his shields. His heart thumps painfully again, palpitating against his ribcage, pushing blood out erratically. Pins and needles erupt in his chest. Itachi takes another step. There's real fear in Sasuke's eyes, the kind of fear you only find in very brave people at the end of their rope. Someone assessing a situation realistically and knowing there is nothing that can be done. It would be funny, because far from dying, Sasuke is getting the best protection the Uchiha clan can provide.
Blood burbles up and spills out from his mouth; the beast in his chest has gotten tired of waiting. The rattle almost finishes him, almost sends him to his knees, but he knows he wouldn't get up again, and Itachi can feel success in his grasp. He steels himself and keeps walking.
Itachi thinks of Madara, of how the illness has ended his stealthiness, of how he's going to die not having completed his investigations, not knowing how much Madara has found out, or intends on telling Sasuke, regardless of truth. That in mind, it doesn't hurt to play the part a little more. His brother needs to believe this lie. "My.. eyes..." he gasps out, and it's easy to mistake the rasp of his voice for villainy, when in fact it is Itachi trying to force air into his lungs through the haze of pain.
He's in front of his younger brother. This is it. Sasuke looks so afraid, and Itachi wishes he could comfort him with the fact that he isn't going to die, all of the maybes and exhausted wishes from other lives they might have had condensed into this one moment of regret. If they could have lived without this giant lie between them.
The pinching in his chest has reached fatal levels, his heart lurching towards the end. He just has to let go, let it shudder into oblivion. The spell passes his lips with ease- he's been practicing it for weeks, after all, all the katas and mental leaps rolled into one verbal command. Susano'o and Amaterasu just need a moment of contact to find the new host. The powers leave him easily, like they were waiting- Itachi expected the drain to finish him, but no, he's conscious of poking his brother's forehead, the last physical contact he gets. In this one moment, it is not just transferring ocular powers. It is Itachi poking his brother's forehead because he can feel the final, inky blackness seeping into his vision, and in this moment, it isn't a lie. This is him, and Itachi can't bring himself to care anymore about pretending to steal Sasuke's eyes. All he can think about, in a rush flooding his sight (is this what it's like? He's still standing while the flashes play) is their younger selves, when Itachi thought he would have endless summers to tell Sasuke "maybe later." If he had known then how their paths would go, he would never have brushed him off. Every time his brother demanded his attention Itachi would have dropped his missions, told his father where to shove it, told the Clan to go fuck themselves, and every time, the poke would have meant "We're going to go play now, go get your stuff." As it is, it is a gesture that means "sorry, maybe later," implying more important things to do. No, Itachi thinks. There's nothing more important. But it also means "I'm sorry, forgive me," and that's okay.
Whether or not Sasuke ever realizes what the moment means, Itachi needs it. He hopes that Sasuke will shrug it off as a moment of inconsistency, will focus on his victory, his life's goal achieved at last.
Itachi's goals ended the moment his fingers slide down his brother's face and everything goes dark.
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one of the conditions that can lead to a heart attack is cardiac dysrhythmia, more specifically automaticity, where one cell can lose the electrical pulse- normally all the cells contract for a beat in unison. One cell beating at a different time causes the heart to vibrate. what a defibrillator is actually doing is sending a shock through the heart that stops all the electric signals and hopefully, when the heart starts back up, giving it a chance to have all the cells going in unison again.
Also on an interesting note, (or maybe not?) automaticity can be caused by hypoxia caused by drowning.
Yaaaaay morbid stuff! So how's everybody doing on the BILLION SUMMER EXCHANGES? Holding up? Me myself, i am procrastinating requests with other requests. :3
also I'm going white-water rafting tomorrow, which is going to be, you know, fucking awesome. :D