...and when i get lucky, those bright, retired colors from the rainbows of my past revisit my summer nights: i am eighteen again.


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walk around this town like we own the streets
stay awake through summer like we own the heati remember chanting this song like i owned eighteen. now two years have passed and it still hits hard.. every summer is the same: friends, ex-boyfriends, parties, and a driveway i've pulled into too many times. but now it's my own car instead of someone i ( Read more... )

skin is saturated from raiding private water in the dark hours. limbs are twitching, antsy from these words: familiar though they've never danced into my ears. sheets are soaked in a scent that tells stories, pages and chapters of memories that seem more like old dreams. fever breaks and i sweat out my fears, limp and pale, dry mouth, goosebumps. a ( Read more... )

..i think it's time for the flower to come out. there is no bear, no wolf, no lioness hibernating deep inside. the roots have finally gotten hold of my heart and i can let go of the reins now, something else is driving me. i want my blood to flow, thick and deep dark red, through my veins and keep me warm. i've been cold for so long, but spring is ( Read more... )

fuck instant gratification. it's easy to be impatient when a single song sums up a lifelong journey. when ninety minutes of romanticized romance undermine a priceless emotion. if i can wait for it, it will be worth it.

because just outside the shade is where it blooms..


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we dream of days with no condensation
drinks that don't sweat in already hot hands
and we cry out for faraway cities
too distant to hold our attention


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i used to be all yellow in the mornings but now i stick my nose in your hair and it smells grassy and you're hugging my waist and my feet disappear between your strong legs and i close my eyes and smile and you kiss my dimple and tell me i'm home..


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i feel absolutely sick to my stomach. for a week i've had this sinking feeling, pulling down on my insides, but there is no escape for them. there is no place safe from these thoughts. for a year i have convinced myself that today would be the day i would wake up and be rid of this nightmare. even if i could sleep i'd be afraid to wake up to a more ( Read more... )

this story's old but it goes on and on until we disappear
calm me and let me taste the salt you breathed while you were underneath
i am the one who haunts your dreams of mountains sunk below the sea
i spoke the words but never gave a thought to what they all could mean


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this is for the bear ( Read more... )