Gut Feeling (1/1)
Title: Gut Feeling
Author: somehowunbroken
Fandom: H50
Characters: Danny/Rachel, implied Steve/Danny
Word Count: 1,847
Rating: NC-17/pegging, angst, dirty talk
Notes: For kink_bingo 2011: pegging. You have been warned.
Summary: Rachel has learned to trust her feelings.
For shinysylver , who gave me half the idea for this, and who looked it over when I worried about it not making sense.
Rachel has come to trust her feelings.
She had felt that Danny would take her back, she’d felt that it was right to get them away from Hawaii, and she’d felt that something was different this time, different in a way she hadn’t been expecting. All of that has been proven correct, though the last - the last gives her pause.
She’d felt it the moment she’d reconnected with Danny, in the way he’d touched her, how he’d spoken at first - rougher, pushing more than he ever had before, but she’s always given just as good as she gets, so she’d shoved right back against him. He’d fallen against the bed and spread his legs wide, pulling her in and locking his thighs around her waist, rubbing his cock against her belly and decidedly not meeting her eyes when she’d asked him what he was doing.
“Nothing,” he’d mumbled instead, and he’d rolled her over and driven in like she’d been expecting, and the thought had left her mind.
It had come back later, though, again and again, and Rachel had started to truly notice the differences about Danny. She’d found no reason for these things at first, but then she’d started to think about the larger context of this new Danny - not just Danny as her ex-husband, or Danny as her lover, or Danny as he’d been in New Jersey. Certainly, he’s still the same person, and yet there are harder edges to him now, breaks where there hadn’t been breaks, edges and angles and surprisingly vulnerable places. She’d had a half-formed idea of what it must have done to him, her leaving and taking Grace, but there was something else that she couldn’t quite put her finger on, something that had been making Danny desperately unhappy while he tried so hard to be just that.
It’s not until he hands her a bag without meeting her eyes that the pieces snap into place. The harness is one that will fit her perfectly, and the dildo is decently sized without being obscene, a deep gray with a wide base. Rachel can feel her eyes widen with shock as she glances from the bag to Danny. His face is flushed pink, but he glances up at her for a moment when she says his name, and that’s all that she needs to make her mind up.
“Please,” he says hoarsely, and Rachel knows that this is the last piece of the puzzle floating just out of reach, that this is somehow the thing that is making Danny so miserable. She doesn’t want to think about how or why or whom, but then again, the answer is just as plain in Danny’s eyes as the need.
“Okay,” she murmurs, and he helps her fasten the harness, settles the dildo almost lovingly into the straps that curl around her curves, and lays back on the bed, legs spread wide.
“Please,” he says again, and his eyelids flutter closed when she moves her hips experimentally, sliding the dildo against the skin of Danny’s inner thigh. “Rachel, c’mon.”
Rachel doesn’t move toward him. Instead, she strokes the length of the dildo strapped to her harness, hanging heavy between her legs. The harness fits snugly just below where her belly is starting to swell, taut and firm. She has the feeling it’s going to be a boy, but there’s no basis for the thought, not really. It’s a feeling, though, and she’s learned to trust those.
“You’ve done this before,” Rachel states, less because she wants the confirmation and more to see if he’ll be truthful with her. It doesn’t take more than a moment for Danny’s eyes to open and search hers out, nor for him to nod. Rachel tilts her head. “But not quite like this, have you?”
Danny licks his lips and shakes his head, more slowly this time. No, not like this, and that’s it, that’s the last bit perfectly clear now, the shape and color of Danny’s partner in Hawaii flickering in Rachel’s mind. Steve McGarrett smiles out from her memory, and Rachel thrusts her hips forward quickly, rubbing the dildo against Danny’s thigh again.
“And now you want my cock in you,” she murmurs, weighing the words against the reaction they get from Danny. Sure enough, his eyes darken and his legs fall open a little more as he nudges his ass towards her.
“God, Rachel, please,” he moans out as she shifts her hips again and slides the dildo down to where his leg meets the rest of his body. “I want-”
“You want me to fuck you,” she cuts in, and Danny moans again. “You want me to push my cock inside you and slam into you until you lose your mind.” Rachel looks at him thoughtfully. “Can you do that, Danny? Can you come from the feel of me inside you, without a hand on you?”
“No,” Danny groans, but there’s a flicker of something even darker than arousal in his eyes, something that she files away. She has the feeling that he probably can, if she pushes him just right.
She nods and grabs the bottle from the bag that Danny had given her. The lubricant is slippery and cold against her fingers, but she pours a good amount out anyway. Danny grabs her wrist as she strokes the skin just below his balls.
“Already did it,” he grinds out. “Come on, Rachel. Fuck me.” He’s pleading with her, begging for her to give this to him, this thing that he’d had and loved so much and now can’t seem to live without. Rachel brings her hand to the dildo and strokes it a few times, coating it as liberally as she can. She keeps her eyes on Danny’s face as she kneels between his legs.
“All spread out and ready for me,” she murmurs into his ear, moving so his cock rubs across her stomach, just above the harness. “You’re just waiting for me to fuck you, Danny.”
Danny sighs and opens his mouth as if he’s going to make a comment, something frustrated and sarcastic and a little too harsh for comfort, so Rachel grabs the dildo in her hand and guides it to press against Danny’s entrance. Whatever he was going to say comes out as a whining sort of gasp, and when she rolls her hips forward and the tip of the dildo slides inside, he slams his eyes shut and groans.
“That’s it,” Rachel says, pushing in a bit further. “That’s it, Danny, open up for me. Take my cock all the way in.”
“Jesus, Rachel,” he pants out beneath her as she rolls her hips again. His hands are twisted so deeply in the bedsheets that she’s afraid he’ll rip through them. “Good, so good.”
“But it’s not the best,” she supplies as she feels the heat of Danny’s body pressed against her own. His eyes fly open and he stares up at her in shock, but before he can manage to respond, Rachel pulls back and thrusts forward. He arches a little off the bed, and she nods as if this confirms something for her. Maybe it does. “It’s not as good as the real thing.”
“It’s good,” Danny repeats, and that not-quite-denial is the answer she was expecting, if not the one she was hoping for. “Rach-”
“Tell me,” she says, pushing forward into Danny’s body again. “Did you feel full like this when he fucked you?”
Danny moans again but doesn’t say anything. His cheeks are flushed, and one of his hands has found its way out of the bedsheets, reaching down for his cock. Rachel slaps it away.
“I can do this all night,” she murmurs. “Tell me, Danny, is this what it felt like when he fucked you, hm? Is my dick bigger or smaller than his?”
“Smaller,” Danny chokes out, throwing his head back and returning his hand to the bedsheets. “He’s - longer than you, a little thicker.”
“You gave me a smaller dick,” Rachel muses, pulling nearly all the way out before thrusting back in. Danny makes a sound like she’s never heard from him before, gravelly and desperate, so she repeats the move again and again. “I wonder what that says, that you purposely gave me a smaller dick than your last fling.”
“Wasn’t,” Danny half-gasps before he shuts his mouth and backtracks. “This isn’t a fling, Rachel.”
“Of course not,” she says, but it sounds like McGarrett wasn’t, either. She wonders, not for the first time, what Danny had given up to get her back. “It doesn’t seem to matter that I’m smaller, does it? You appear to be enjoying yourself anyway.”
“Yeah,” Danny breathes out, his voice half-catching in his chest.
“So tell me,” Rachel asks almost conversationally as she continues to thrust. “Do you like mine better than his, or do you still miss his more?”
“No,” Danny replies, and she’s not sure if it’s a refusal to answer or if that is his answer. Either way, she’s got the feeling that it’s not good news for her. She settles a little further down between Danny’s legs, making the dildo slide in at a different angle, and when she starts thrusting in earnest, Danny gives up speech entirely, communicating instead in strangled sounds and gasping moans.
Rachel leans forward until her face is inches from Danny’s. “Tell me,” she nearly whispers into his ear as she circles her hips. “Tell me, Danny, did he ever fuck you until you came? Did he have the stamina for that like I do?”
“Yes,” Danny nearly howls as Rachel slams into him forcefully. It only takes a few more thrusts before Danny jerks and comes between their bodies.
Rachel pulls the dildo out slowly, carefully, and unstraps the harness. She carries the whole thing into the bathroom and dumps it onto the floor; they can deal with it later. Danny gives her a sleepy, sated smile and nuzzles into her neck when she slips back into bed with him. “Love you, babe.”
“Goodnight,” Rachel replies quietly, watching as he falls asleep in a matter of moments. She won’t have that luck, not tonight, she knows. Her gaze wanders to the harness and the dildo, barely visible from her spot in the bed. She has the feeling that she’ll be putting it on more and more, until it’s impractical to do so around her stomach. She can see herself, in three or four months, thrusting the dildo into Danny by hand, trying to give him what he wants, perhaps even needs.
She has the feeling that it won’t matter, in the long run, that this is merely a temporary fix to a problem that can’t be so easily solved. Rachel has the feeling that they’ll both try and try, and that they’ll grow bitter until they hate each other again, until there’s no chance for any sort of friendship between them.
She wonders if it’s worth it to keep going, knowing what she does.
She has the feeling it isn’t.
Author: somehowunbroken
Fandom: H50
Characters: Danny/Rachel, implied Steve/Danny
Word Count: 1,847
Rating: NC-17/pegging, angst, dirty talk
Notes: For kink_bingo 2011: pegging. You have been warned.
Summary: Rachel has learned to trust her feelings.
For shinysylver , who gave me half the idea for this, and who looked it over when I worried about it not making sense.
Rachel has come to trust her feelings.
She had felt that Danny would take her back, she’d felt that it was right to get them away from Hawaii, and she’d felt that something was different this time, different in a way she hadn’t been expecting. All of that has been proven correct, though the last - the last gives her pause.
She’d felt it the moment she’d reconnected with Danny, in the way he’d touched her, how he’d spoken at first - rougher, pushing more than he ever had before, but she’s always given just as good as she gets, so she’d shoved right back against him. He’d fallen against the bed and spread his legs wide, pulling her in and locking his thighs around her waist, rubbing his cock against her belly and decidedly not meeting her eyes when she’d asked him what he was doing.
“Nothing,” he’d mumbled instead, and he’d rolled her over and driven in like she’d been expecting, and the thought had left her mind.
It had come back later, though, again and again, and Rachel had started to truly notice the differences about Danny. She’d found no reason for these things at first, but then she’d started to think about the larger context of this new Danny - not just Danny as her ex-husband, or Danny as her lover, or Danny as he’d been in New Jersey. Certainly, he’s still the same person, and yet there are harder edges to him now, breaks where there hadn’t been breaks, edges and angles and surprisingly vulnerable places. She’d had a half-formed idea of what it must have done to him, her leaving and taking Grace, but there was something else that she couldn’t quite put her finger on, something that had been making Danny desperately unhappy while he tried so hard to be just that.
It’s not until he hands her a bag without meeting her eyes that the pieces snap into place. The harness is one that will fit her perfectly, and the dildo is decently sized without being obscene, a deep gray with a wide base. Rachel can feel her eyes widen with shock as she glances from the bag to Danny. His face is flushed pink, but he glances up at her for a moment when she says his name, and that’s all that she needs to make her mind up.
“Please,” he says hoarsely, and Rachel knows that this is the last piece of the puzzle floating just out of reach, that this is somehow the thing that is making Danny so miserable. She doesn’t want to think about how or why or whom, but then again, the answer is just as plain in Danny’s eyes as the need.
“Okay,” she murmurs, and he helps her fasten the harness, settles the dildo almost lovingly into the straps that curl around her curves, and lays back on the bed, legs spread wide.
“Please,” he says again, and his eyelids flutter closed when she moves her hips experimentally, sliding the dildo against the skin of Danny’s inner thigh. “Rachel, c’mon.”
Rachel doesn’t move toward him. Instead, she strokes the length of the dildo strapped to her harness, hanging heavy between her legs. The harness fits snugly just below where her belly is starting to swell, taut and firm. She has the feeling it’s going to be a boy, but there’s no basis for the thought, not really. It’s a feeling, though, and she’s learned to trust those.
“You’ve done this before,” Rachel states, less because she wants the confirmation and more to see if he’ll be truthful with her. It doesn’t take more than a moment for Danny’s eyes to open and search hers out, nor for him to nod. Rachel tilts her head. “But not quite like this, have you?”
Danny licks his lips and shakes his head, more slowly this time. No, not like this, and that’s it, that’s the last bit perfectly clear now, the shape and color of Danny’s partner in Hawaii flickering in Rachel’s mind. Steve McGarrett smiles out from her memory, and Rachel thrusts her hips forward quickly, rubbing the dildo against Danny’s thigh again.
“And now you want my cock in you,” she murmurs, weighing the words against the reaction they get from Danny. Sure enough, his eyes darken and his legs fall open a little more as he nudges his ass towards her.
“God, Rachel, please,” he moans out as she shifts her hips again and slides the dildo down to where his leg meets the rest of his body. “I want-”
“You want me to fuck you,” she cuts in, and Danny moans again. “You want me to push my cock inside you and slam into you until you lose your mind.” Rachel looks at him thoughtfully. “Can you do that, Danny? Can you come from the feel of me inside you, without a hand on you?”
“No,” Danny groans, but there’s a flicker of something even darker than arousal in his eyes, something that she files away. She has the feeling that he probably can, if she pushes him just right.
She nods and grabs the bottle from the bag that Danny had given her. The lubricant is slippery and cold against her fingers, but she pours a good amount out anyway. Danny grabs her wrist as she strokes the skin just below his balls.
“Already did it,” he grinds out. “Come on, Rachel. Fuck me.” He’s pleading with her, begging for her to give this to him, this thing that he’d had and loved so much and now can’t seem to live without. Rachel brings her hand to the dildo and strokes it a few times, coating it as liberally as she can. She keeps her eyes on Danny’s face as she kneels between his legs.
“All spread out and ready for me,” she murmurs into his ear, moving so his cock rubs across her stomach, just above the harness. “You’re just waiting for me to fuck you, Danny.”
Danny sighs and opens his mouth as if he’s going to make a comment, something frustrated and sarcastic and a little too harsh for comfort, so Rachel grabs the dildo in her hand and guides it to press against Danny’s entrance. Whatever he was going to say comes out as a whining sort of gasp, and when she rolls her hips forward and the tip of the dildo slides inside, he slams his eyes shut and groans.
“That’s it,” Rachel says, pushing in a bit further. “That’s it, Danny, open up for me. Take my cock all the way in.”
“Jesus, Rachel,” he pants out beneath her as she rolls her hips again. His hands are twisted so deeply in the bedsheets that she’s afraid he’ll rip through them. “Good, so good.”
“But it’s not the best,” she supplies as she feels the heat of Danny’s body pressed against her own. His eyes fly open and he stares up at her in shock, but before he can manage to respond, Rachel pulls back and thrusts forward. He arches a little off the bed, and she nods as if this confirms something for her. Maybe it does. “It’s not as good as the real thing.”
“It’s good,” Danny repeats, and that not-quite-denial is the answer she was expecting, if not the one she was hoping for. “Rach-”
“Tell me,” she says, pushing forward into Danny’s body again. “Did you feel full like this when he fucked you?”
Danny moans again but doesn’t say anything. His cheeks are flushed, and one of his hands has found its way out of the bedsheets, reaching down for his cock. Rachel slaps it away.
“I can do this all night,” she murmurs. “Tell me, Danny, is this what it felt like when he fucked you, hm? Is my dick bigger or smaller than his?”
“Smaller,” Danny chokes out, throwing his head back and returning his hand to the bedsheets. “He’s - longer than you, a little thicker.”
“You gave me a smaller dick,” Rachel muses, pulling nearly all the way out before thrusting back in. Danny makes a sound like she’s never heard from him before, gravelly and desperate, so she repeats the move again and again. “I wonder what that says, that you purposely gave me a smaller dick than your last fling.”
“Wasn’t,” Danny half-gasps before he shuts his mouth and backtracks. “This isn’t a fling, Rachel.”
“Of course not,” she says, but it sounds like McGarrett wasn’t, either. She wonders, not for the first time, what Danny had given up to get her back. “It doesn’t seem to matter that I’m smaller, does it? You appear to be enjoying yourself anyway.”
“Yeah,” Danny breathes out, his voice half-catching in his chest.
“So tell me,” Rachel asks almost conversationally as she continues to thrust. “Do you like mine better than his, or do you still miss his more?”
“No,” Danny replies, and she’s not sure if it’s a refusal to answer or if that is his answer. Either way, she’s got the feeling that it’s not good news for her. She settles a little further down between Danny’s legs, making the dildo slide in at a different angle, and when she starts thrusting in earnest, Danny gives up speech entirely, communicating instead in strangled sounds and gasping moans.
Rachel leans forward until her face is inches from Danny’s. “Tell me,” she nearly whispers into his ear as she circles her hips. “Tell me, Danny, did he ever fuck you until you came? Did he have the stamina for that like I do?”
“Yes,” Danny nearly howls as Rachel slams into him forcefully. It only takes a few more thrusts before Danny jerks and comes between their bodies.
Rachel pulls the dildo out slowly, carefully, and unstraps the harness. She carries the whole thing into the bathroom and dumps it onto the floor; they can deal with it later. Danny gives her a sleepy, sated smile and nuzzles into her neck when she slips back into bed with him. “Love you, babe.”
“Goodnight,” Rachel replies quietly, watching as he falls asleep in a matter of moments. She won’t have that luck, not tonight, she knows. Her gaze wanders to the harness and the dildo, barely visible from her spot in the bed. She has the feeling that she’ll be putting it on more and more, until it’s impractical to do so around her stomach. She can see herself, in three or four months, thrusting the dildo into Danny by hand, trying to give him what he wants, perhaps even needs.
She has the feeling that it won’t matter, in the long run, that this is merely a temporary fix to a problem that can’t be so easily solved. Rachel has the feeling that they’ll both try and try, and that they’ll grow bitter until they hate each other again, until there’s no chance for any sort of friendship between them.
She wonders if it’s worth it to keep going, knowing what she does.
She has the feeling it isn’t.