I grieve and dare not show my discontent,
I love and yet am forced to seem to hate,
I do, yet dare not say I ever meant,
I seem stark mute but inwardly to prate.
I am and not, I freeze and yet am burned.
Since from myself another self I turned.My care is like my shadow in the sun ( Read more... )

I let you down ( Read more... )

1) Zoo habitat designer
2) Hotel and resort critic
3) Museum exhibit designer, specifically natural science or history
4) Travel agent for celebrities
5) Historical reenactment person, specifically for the Texas Revolution, Golden Age of Piracy or Tudor England

"Today I had a thought: what if I had never met you?"

Tomorrow, he will have been gone two years. Two years. I can't even believe it. He's still so much a part of my life, it's hard to think that I haven't heard his voice in two years.

All the commercials for the new WWII movie Valkyrie made me think about my grandfather. He was a fighter pilot during the war, and when he was alive he loved to tell stories about his time in Europe. His favorite story (and the chapter I remember most from his book) was about how he killed Hitler in 1943. The perfect secret mission, flying over ( Read more... )

My Thanksgiving is getting all jacked around because of Muslims and I don't like it ( Read more... )

I'm having a hard time with all the controversy surrounding Prop 8 in California. On one hand, I fully support gay marriage and think that Prop 8 is a horribly unfair, biggoted piece of legislation. Equality is a right in our country, and I don't believe that it is fair for people to tell others how to live their lives and what they should be ( Read more... )

Every three months or so, I go more crazy than usual about a specific topic. That topic involves, cake, white, diamonds and flowers. I start looking at photos, visualizing how I should wear my hair, making imaginary guest lists. It's usually just a temporary thing; after about a week I stop obsessing over what color will look good on Lily AND Zaff ( Read more... )

I may be lonely and terrified and completely unsure of my career, but at least now I have some semblance of a plan. Within the next six months I'm moving to Denver. No matter what. I've realized that the hotel industry is NOT where I want to be. It's ok for the next few months, but then it's time to move on.

He wants us to buy a house.

It comes in cycles. Waves of loneliness oscilating back and forth through my days. Lately they've become more frequent. And bigger. To the point where I have to jump up from lunch and hurry back to my office so I don't start crying in front of people. What's come over me? Last night was so much fun. Too much fun... too much fun? I know it's a bad ( Read more... )