Sister, sister
[Soolin had saved her last vial of Somnifera for just nights like this: when normal drugs wouldn't help. She'd woken up after an hour or two, then tossed and turned restlessly for another. No. She needed to face the girl tomorrow, and needed restful sleep. She opened the cap and drank the last honeyed drops, then fell into a deep sleep.]
It's the meadow again, her with her mother. Soolin is just old enough to tend for the sheep. Her mother has come there with a smiling, gurgling baby, with hair as blonde as hers. Soolin reaches out to touch the baby's hand. The baby grips her finger very tight, so tight it hurts. Mother soothes the baby's tiny fingers away from Soolin's and hushes her.
You have a new playmate, Soolin. When she's big enough you two can herd the sheep together.
She's happy, very happy, and reaches on her toes to stroke the baby's silky hair. Mother laughs, and the sun shines on her face as she speaks the baby's name, like a soft prayer.
Luva.
Loo-va. Loo-va. Soolin tastes the syllables in their mouth and they are pleasant, tasting like wild strawberries. She spells her sister's name in sticks on the ground, and with a few corrections from mother, gets it right. This makes her happy. She has a sister and she is named.
Sticks don't feel right, though, so she brushes them off and writes the name in pale green grass. Much better. This is what she will remember.
From then on, she guarded her little sister so well mother had to shoo her away sometimes. She taught Luva all the words she knew, which at that age wasn't many. When Luva first exclaimed "Soo!", Soolin hugged her so hard she coughed.
The last she remembers of her is the helpless cry "Mama", choking off in the smoke and flames.
She's lying in the med unit, cold, naked, only a paper sheet covering her. There's a mirror in the ceiling and she's there. Skin white, lips and eyes bloodless, mouth purple with death. Luva is there, she is Luva. And just like the baby, she squeezes and squeezes and squeezes until it hurts, until Soolin shouts, but no sound comes out. She shouts so hard her ribcage bursts open, and her dead purple blood stains the sheet. She's dead, but she's dying, and she can't stop, and the sound of cracking bone pierces her eardrums.
[Soolin wakes up with a jerk, her heart pounding. For a minute it feels like she really can't breathe, but she manages to draw a shivering breath, then two, and reach for a glass of water. She grabs the vial of Somnifera and throws it so hard it shatters on the wall.]
It's the meadow again, her with her mother. Soolin is just old enough to tend for the sheep. Her mother has come there with a smiling, gurgling baby, with hair as blonde as hers. Soolin reaches out to touch the baby's hand. The baby grips her finger very tight, so tight it hurts. Mother soothes the baby's tiny fingers away from Soolin's and hushes her.
You have a new playmate, Soolin. When she's big enough you two can herd the sheep together.
She's happy, very happy, and reaches on her toes to stroke the baby's silky hair. Mother laughs, and the sun shines on her face as she speaks the baby's name, like a soft prayer.
Luva.
Loo-va. Loo-va. Soolin tastes the syllables in their mouth and they are pleasant, tasting like wild strawberries. She spells her sister's name in sticks on the ground, and with a few corrections from mother, gets it right. This makes her happy. She has a sister and she is named.
Sticks don't feel right, though, so she brushes them off and writes the name in pale green grass. Much better. This is what she will remember.
From then on, she guarded her little sister so well mother had to shoo her away sometimes. She taught Luva all the words she knew, which at that age wasn't many. When Luva first exclaimed "Soo!", Soolin hugged her so hard she coughed.
The last she remembers of her is the helpless cry "Mama", choking off in the smoke and flames.
She's lying in the med unit, cold, naked, only a paper sheet covering her. There's a mirror in the ceiling and she's there. Skin white, lips and eyes bloodless, mouth purple with death. Luva is there, she is Luva. And just like the baby, she squeezes and squeezes and squeezes until it hurts, until Soolin shouts, but no sound comes out. She shouts so hard her ribcage bursts open, and her dead purple blood stains the sheet. She's dead, but she's dying, and she can't stop, and the sound of cracking bone pierces her eardrums.
[Soolin wakes up with a jerk, her heart pounding. For a minute it feels like she really can't breathe, but she manages to draw a shivering breath, then two, and reach for a glass of water. She grabs the vial of Somnifera and throws it so hard it shatters on the wall.]