Waiting For Your Essence - Part 1
Waiting For Your Essence
Prologue
Part 1
The club was loud and crowded, full of people who seemed to be having an awesome time. She envied them. Bella stood to the side, nursing her beer as she watched. The way people moved, coalescing into pairs, moving apart to reform in other groups, then dissolving again into couples fascinated her. Like the easy slide in and out of relationships that she seemed unable to master.
Maybe that was why she such a bad dancer.
“You should be out there.” Rose, her roommate, appeared at her elbow, leaning against the bar. “What's going on, Bells?”
Bella shrugged. Smiles didn't seem to come easily these days, but she knew when to fake it. “Just taking a break. It's hot out there.”
Rose raised an eyebrow. “You've been hugging the bar all night. I thought you wanted to come?”
“I did,” Bella reassured her. “I just have this headache and it's making me a little dizzy. You go have fun. Jess looks like she needs someone to save her from that creeper who keeps trying to freak her.”
Rose laughed as she took in the gangly dude who seemed all arms and legs that were surrounding Jess as she tried to dance away. “Good eye. Rose to the rescue.”
She sat her empty bottle down. “We'll talk more later, alright, Bella?”
Bella nodded. Rose always tried, but what more was there to say? She knew the world was rushing by all around her, but she couldn't seem to care. It felt like she was on permanent hold, waiting for something to happen. But she didn't know what.
She tossed back the rest of her beer and glanced towards the hallway where the restrooms were. It was a small miracle that the usual line snaking out was gone. She tossed her bottle, and headed in that direction. Some cold water on her face and an aspirin would help, and then she'd get back out there.
The dim light of the hallway illuminated the dark walls and half ripped posters that adorned it, and the couple that was leaned against the wall, oblivious to everything but the serious dry humping they were engaged in. Sighing, Bella dodged to avoid the enthusastic pair, and walked straight into a guy exiting the men's room on the opposite side.
She wobbled on the heels that had been killing her feet all night, and felt strong hands shoot out and steady her before she could lose her balance completely.
“Thanks,” she said, looking up. His face was shadowed, the light behind him casting a faint nimbus around his wild hair. But his touch, light on the curve of her elbows as he held her steady, had the familarity of an old lover.
“Do I know you?” she blurted out.
He shook his head. “Not yet, Isabella. But you will.”
Releasing her, he stepped around her and was gone.
What the hell? Headache forgotten, she turned and hurried back into the club, looking around for the guy. She hadn't even gotten a good look at his face. But there was no sign of him.
Disappointed, she caught Rose's eye, who nodded to the flagging Jess and tapped her wrist. It was time to head home. Bella nodded and worked her way towards the exit.
\/ \/
She woke with a start and shivered, her skin chilled despite the blanket she was huddled beneath. The night was quiet, but the moonlight shining through her window was bright as day. She rolled away, nestling further into the cocoon of her blanket, and then she heard it. Her name, called faint and soft, yet commanding.
"Oh, Isabella," the voice crooned. "It's time. Come to me."
She emerged from the bed, confused as she surveyed the room. The walls were stone, thick and dark, as was the floor. She glanced down at the long white nightgown that was made of a soft, thin material.
This was not her room.
She heard the voice again calling her name, seductive as he sang out, "Isabella, come out, come out now. I'm waiting for you."
She moved to the window and peered down below to the man standing in the grass. He was illuminated by the moonlight, his face revealed as he tipped it back to stare up at her. His eyes held her even from a distance, their dark depths full of promises about things she couldn't even contemplate, if she'd only come to him.
He raised a hand, crooking a finger, and beckoning her in silence, and she couldn't seem to look away. She found herself nodding, entranced, moving without conscious thought. Barefoot, the stone beneath her feet was cold as she walked down hallways and passages she'd never seen that were still hauntingly familiar. She descended to where he waited.
His mouth turned up in a smile that made her shiver as she emerged onto the lawn and stood before him. He moved towards her, his fingers ghosting against the side of her face, not quite touching.
"I've waited for you for so long," he murmured. "So very long. And now, now you're mine."
A part of her mind protested that she wasn't his, that she wasn't even sure who he was or why she was here, but there was a stronger pull inside, a visceral tether that made her nod and step closer so she was nearly touching him. The proximity soothed her and she took a breath. His smile deepened.
"That's right, my sweet, come closer."
She was filled with a longing that was unreasonable and irrational, but so sharp and intense that she gave in and followed. She needed him to touch her now. Her head lolled to the side, baring her neck in the moonlight.
He obliged her, his fingers following the line of her throat, cool against her skin, and she gasped, the tiny points of contact lighting up her body.
"More," she heard herself beg, boldly pressing herself against him now.
"Say it," he growled, his arms now encasing her, making her feel whole, complete with what she hadn't realized she was lacking. "Who do you belong to?"
"You. I'm yours."
He cradled her head in his hand and descended, smooth lips meeting skin. She felt the press of sharp teeth against her flesh as she finally understood what he wanted.
Her blood.
\/ \/
Bella sat up in bed with a start, hands clutching at her throat as she felt the skin there still intact and unbroken. She took a deep breath, trying to calm her heart that seemed about to pound out of her chest.
"Bella? You okay?" a sleepy voice asked from the other side of the dorm room.
A lamp light clicked on, and Bella covered her eyes at the sudden brightness.
"I'm sorry, Rose. Bad dream. I didn't mean to wake you.” She stood up, feeling with her toes for her bedroom slippers. “I'm just going to go get some water."
"Was it zombies?" Rose asked, as she rolled back over. "Ever since Emmett dragged us to that haunted house last weekend, I've been dreaming they want my brains."
Bella laughed. "No, no zombies. Go back to sleep."
She grabbed a cup and her robe, and quietly shut the door behind her as she shuffled into the hallway and towards the bathroom. It was deserted for once, the fluorescents casting a sickly glow on the white tile. Filling her cup halfway at one of the sinks, she watched herself in the mirror as she slowly sipped.
It had felt so real.
She touched her neck again, the blue vein just barely visible beneath the skin. What was her mind trying to tell her with that gothic bodice ripper of a dream?
She'd been in an old house, like some kind of English country manor, or maybe even an old castle with all that stone. Where had that come from? Maybe she'd been reading too much Austen, or a few too many of those fluffy Regency romances she liked to buy now and then in the grocery checkout.
And the man. No, not a man. A vampire. Her skin prickled as she closed her eyes and remembered his face. He'd been beautiful, his face like some kind of fallen angel. And those eyes. She'd been mesmerized by them, willing to acquiesce to any request.
Weren't vampires suppose to be a metaphor for sex? Maybe that's what her subconscious was trying to draw to her attention. Sex. Or the lack thereof in her life.
She looked at her reflection, cheeks now flushed, and shook her head. Zombie dreams would be so much simpler.
\/ \/
The next morning, she dragged herself back to her dorm room post-shower, still toweling her hair. It was a good thing it was finally Friday. Between pulling an all-nighter on Tuesday for a procrastinated paper and staggering in after two last night, her sleep deprivation was reaching epic levels. No wonder she was having weird dreams.
“No hot water?” Rose asked, as Bella sat her shower supplies down and started rummaging in her closet.
“Of course not. If you don't get up at the crack of dawn like you do to go running, it always gets used up.” Bella rolled her shoulders. “I could have used something better than lukewarm today, too. I'm going to need to set up a caffeine drip to stay awake today.”
“So what did you dream about last night?” Rose asked, fussing with the coffee maker as she measured out the ground beans precisely. “You looked pretty freaked.”
Bella shrugged and stared longingly at the coffee pot as it began to rumble. “Nothing really. You know those dreams where you're you, but you're not you? Like you're in somebody else's dream?”
Rose raised an eyebrow. “Like you're Lindsay Lohan or something?”
Bella shivered. “Now that would be a nightmare. Kind of like that. It's like you're in LiLo's body, but you're still Rose in your mind. Have you had those?”
She pulled a mug out, pacing over to the coffee maker as a knock sounded on their door. It swung open before either of them could respond and Jessica popped her head in the room. “Hey Rose, can I borrow your red sweater today?”
“The one that make your boobs like bigger?” Rose asked, motioning her inside. “Which hottie are you trying to impress now?”
Jessica pretended to look offended as she bounced into the room. “It doesn't have to be about a guy, you know.”
“But it is,” Bella muttered, pouring the dark liquid that had finally finished percolating into her mug and inhaling deeply.
“Fine, fine. It's Mike, okay. He's cute, and I'm guessing having a big guy at your side can't be a bad thing with girls disappearing from campus and all.”
She tossed the campus newspaper on to Bella's bed, the headline practically jumping off the page as she stabbed it with her finger. “No Leads on Missing Student. What kind of campus safety is that?”
Bella picked up the paper, skimming the text under the headline. “Amy Moore. Sophomore. Lived off campus with three roommates. She didn't come home on Wednesday night.” She tossed the paper back to Jessica. “So what? This one over there disappears with Em about every other weekend and I don't file a missing persons report.”
Rose shrugged and nodded. “Does she have a boyfriend?”
Jessica picked the paper back up. “There was some guy she'd just started dating, but her roommates hadn't met him. They weren't very close with her - they all just moved in together this year.” Her eyes widened. “Do you think there's a serial killer on campus?”
Bella groaned. “C'mon, Jess. This Amy girl's probably love shacked up with her new dude and she'll resurface by Monday. Who knows? You wear that red sweater and flash your cleavage at Mike just right, and we may be trying to find where you disappeared to this weekend.”
Jessica smiled. “So true.” She snatched up the sweater. “Thanks again, Rose. See you later.”
The door shut behind her and Bella shook her head, taking a long sip from her mug. “Way too much energy first thing in the morning. How does she do it?”
“I hear you,” Rose replied, sipping her own coffee. “So what was the dream again?”
Bella shook her head. “It wasn't anything big. It was in some big old drafty house, like something out of Masterpiece Theater, and there was this guy.”
“Oh,” Rose interjected, wiggling her eyebrows. “One of those kind of dreams, huh? Was there bodice ripping? No wonder you sounded all breathless when you woke up.”
Bella snorted. “Yeah, I wish. No, he was kind of . . . not stalking, but like, calling me to him. And it was like I had to go to where he was waiting for me.” And he was a vampire who called me his and bit me, her brain finished silently, but she bit her tongue. Rose would probably just tell her she'd watched too many tv shows about dreamy vampires. “And then I woke up.”
“Doesn't sound that scary to me. At least he didn't try to eat your brains,” Rose said. “Was he creepy or something?”
“Yeah, I guess you could say that.” And beautiful. Bella stood up and started shoving books in her bag. “It was just weird. I hate having those kind of dreams. They just always throw me, make me feel outside myself.”
Rose picked up her own bag. “Huh. I don't think I've ever had one like that. I always have those falling dreams? The ones where they say if you hit the bottom you'll die?”
“I think that's a myth, Rose.”
“I don't want to find out. I've gotten lucky so far,” Rose replied. “I always wake up.” She grabbed up her phone as it started to vibrate. “Em's outside. Want to walk up to main campus with us?”
Bella grabbed her jacket. “Sure. Let's go.” She poured the rest of her coffee in her thermos to give her a little caffeine boost throughout the morning.
“They're having a party at Em's house tonight. You gonna come with?” Rose asked, as she turned to lock the door behind them.
Bella frowned. “It's not that I don't want to, but I'm beat, Rose, and tomorrow . . .”
“You need to go see her again?”
Bella nodded. “It's just the last few times I've gone, she hasn't been so great. She doesn't really know who I am, but I still think she likes it when I'm there.”
Rose put her arm around her, giving her a sideways hug. “I'm sorry, Bells. I know that's tough to see your Gram that way. I just worry about you sometimes.” She lowered her voice. “All work and no play make Bella a dull girl.”
Bella laughed. “Rose, that's the worst Jack Nicholson impression I think I've ever heard.”
“Made you laugh though,” Rose said as she bounced ahead. “Now come on. Emmett told me he thinks he's found the guy for you. He's one of the new transfers on the football team - and get this, he's an English major like you. Perfect, huh? He was going to introduce you tonight at the party, but maybe we can have lunch together today instead? Low key, no pressure, I promise.”
“Rose, c'mon,” Bella protested. “You guys know I hate setups.”
Rose shook her head, clearly not taking no for an answer. “Bella, what's one lunch going to hurt? We'll be there - it won't be like a blind date or something. Or do you just prefer dream guys?”
Bella sighed. “Fine. Lunch. But you better not bail halfway through, like you did with that Justin dude. He would not shut up about his fantasy draft round picks.”
Rose grinned. “We wouldn't dream of it.”
\/ \/
The moon was bright, illuminating the lawn below. She stood at the window, the stone sill cool beneath her fingers, and stared out across the manicured, precisely laid out grounds that descended to a small lake. A set of oddly set stones stood beside it, almost monolithic as they rose from the ground like crude approximations of the columns of a temple.
They seemed out of place among the trimmed hedges and shining white follies whose small roofs peeked out among the gardens.
Her attention was distracted by movement below, a single rider on a dark horse sweeping up the road towards the house. She knew who it was, could feel it in her bones with every clop of the horse hooves that brought him closer.
He'd come for her. He would always come for her.
She didn't know why she was certain of that, but the knowledge seemed to permeate her bones.
The horse roared to a stop beneath her, and she watched as he slid off, giving a pat to the magnificent beast's neck and whispering something in its ear before it tore back down the road, riderless now. He turned his attention to her, looking straight up as though he knew precisely where she was, precisely where she'd be waiting.
“Isabella? Won't you come to me?”
His words rang in her ears as though he were standing beside her, and even as she backed away from the window, she still felt the force of his gaze. She turned back to her bed, curling onto the mattress and pulling the coverlet around her as a shiver swept through her. Trying to fight the inevitable seemed pointless, and yet she hated this desire to rush to him that she couldn't seem to control.
“My sweet, it is only a matter of time.”
It surged inside her again, the longing that had drawn her to the window to wait for his arrival, but she still resisted. She threw the blanket away, ignoring the coolness of the night as she turned to the door and began to move, feet navigating hallways and stairs until she found the passage she was looking for. Small and unassuming, she slipped out the narrow doorway, into the gardens, and away from him.
She wouldn't be his to command.
The moon seemed dimmer now, clouds drifting across the sky and leaving everything in shadow. The small gravel lining the pathways bit into her bare feet, and she found herself creeping onto the soft grass. She didn't know where she was going, but she needed to keep moving.
“Why do you run from me, Isabella?”
Her throat seemed dry and unable to produce sound as she heard the crunch of steps behind her. She turned to find him regarding her intently. The little light left him a creature of shadow, the sharp angles of his face just barely visible, but she knew he was staring straight at her.
“I know what you want,” she finally managed to choke out.
The shadows shifted and she realized he was smiling now as he stepped closer.
“Do you now?” he asked. “But have you realized yet that it's what you want as well?”
She tried to shake her head, but the closer he came, the harder it seemed to move.
“Why do you make me wait so long, my sweet?” he asked. “This was meant to be.”
The tall hedge was at her back, and his arms now boxed her in as he stepped closed. He touched her cheek gently, the back of his hand sliding beneath her chin and forcing her to meet his gaze.
“So soft,” he murmured. “So fine.”
She wanted to look away, but the enchantment she'd been fighting seemed to wind around her and him like a silken rope. She found herself nodding as he spoke again.
“Who do you belong to, Isabella?” he asked, his lips tracing across the skin of her throat. “Tell me you're mine.”
It was more plea than order, but she had only one answer. “Yours,” she responded, letting her eyes close as she waited for it.
His lips touched her skin, and then she felt the bite.
\/ \/
Bella jerked awake, a cold sweat washing over her. The clock dial glowed quarter after two, and Rose's bed was still empty. She could hear people outside in the hallway, returning from last call and parties winding down.
It hadn't been real.
She say up and fumbled for her lamp, her free hand touching her throat. It had felt like it though. She'd always been a vivid dreamer, and she often found herself in what seemed to be someone else's body in those dreams, but this - this was almost surreal. She'd felt that bite, the sharp sear of pain mingled with something . . . less painful. Almost exhilarating.
The golden glow of the light that flooded the room made her feel calmer, and she slipped out of bed, kneeling in front of the mini-fridge and fumbling for a bottle of water. She rolled the cold container against her forehead, breathing slowly and hoping her heart would stop pounding.
The door behind her rattled and she turned as Emmett stumbled into the room, a giggling Rose slung over his shoulder.
“Bella! We missed you tonight,” Emmett said, sliding her unsteady roommate off his shoulder. “Look at you, you're still up. You should have come.”
Bella shook her head. “Just woke up, Em. I'm not like Rose. I need my beauty sleep.”
Rose, whose mascara had smudged into a raccoon-like state, blew a raspberry at her. “Please. You're pretty, Bella. Tommy thought so.” She turned to her boyfriend. “Didn't he, Em? He kept talking about you tonight.” She squared her shoulders and lowered her voice. “Bella's hot. I'd do her.” She giggled again and flopped back on the bed.
Bella rolled her eyes. “Can you tell your girlfriend ixnay on the impressions, Em. She's not so great at them.”
Emmett laughed as he picked up Rose's foot and started unzipping her boots. “She's so cute when she does them, though.” He tossed one boot down and started working on the other. “The house was a wreck after the party, and Tyler had some skank up in our room. You mind if I crash here tonight?”
“No, it's good. I have to be up early though.”
Emmett nodded. “You know this one's gonna be cranky in the a.m. You'll probably want to be gone before she wakes up.” He chuckled and dropped a kiss on Rose's forehead. “I try to tell her she can't handle jello shots, but she never listens.”
Bella watched as he carefully maneuvered her roommate onto the bed. Why couldn't she find a guy like Em? Even in her dreams the guys were after only one thing.
“Night, Em,” she said, curling back up in her bed and hoping for at least a few hours of uninterrupted sleep.
Prologue
Part 1
The club was loud and crowded, full of people who seemed to be having an awesome time. She envied them. Bella stood to the side, nursing her beer as she watched. The way people moved, coalescing into pairs, moving apart to reform in other groups, then dissolving again into couples fascinated her. Like the easy slide in and out of relationships that she seemed unable to master.
Maybe that was why she such a bad dancer.
“You should be out there.” Rose, her roommate, appeared at her elbow, leaning against the bar. “What's going on, Bells?”
Bella shrugged. Smiles didn't seem to come easily these days, but she knew when to fake it. “Just taking a break. It's hot out there.”
Rose raised an eyebrow. “You've been hugging the bar all night. I thought you wanted to come?”
“I did,” Bella reassured her. “I just have this headache and it's making me a little dizzy. You go have fun. Jess looks like she needs someone to save her from that creeper who keeps trying to freak her.”
Rose laughed as she took in the gangly dude who seemed all arms and legs that were surrounding Jess as she tried to dance away. “Good eye. Rose to the rescue.”
She sat her empty bottle down. “We'll talk more later, alright, Bella?”
Bella nodded. Rose always tried, but what more was there to say? She knew the world was rushing by all around her, but she couldn't seem to care. It felt like she was on permanent hold, waiting for something to happen. But she didn't know what.
She tossed back the rest of her beer and glanced towards the hallway where the restrooms were. It was a small miracle that the usual line snaking out was gone. She tossed her bottle, and headed in that direction. Some cold water on her face and an aspirin would help, and then she'd get back out there.
The dim light of the hallway illuminated the dark walls and half ripped posters that adorned it, and the couple that was leaned against the wall, oblivious to everything but the serious dry humping they were engaged in. Sighing, Bella dodged to avoid the enthusastic pair, and walked straight into a guy exiting the men's room on the opposite side.
She wobbled on the heels that had been killing her feet all night, and felt strong hands shoot out and steady her before she could lose her balance completely.
“Thanks,” she said, looking up. His face was shadowed, the light behind him casting a faint nimbus around his wild hair. But his touch, light on the curve of her elbows as he held her steady, had the familarity of an old lover.
“Do I know you?” she blurted out.
He shook his head. “Not yet, Isabella. But you will.”
Releasing her, he stepped around her and was gone.
What the hell? Headache forgotten, she turned and hurried back into the club, looking around for the guy. She hadn't even gotten a good look at his face. But there was no sign of him.
Disappointed, she caught Rose's eye, who nodded to the flagging Jess and tapped her wrist. It was time to head home. Bella nodded and worked her way towards the exit.
\/ \/
She woke with a start and shivered, her skin chilled despite the blanket she was huddled beneath. The night was quiet, but the moonlight shining through her window was bright as day. She rolled away, nestling further into the cocoon of her blanket, and then she heard it. Her name, called faint and soft, yet commanding.
"Oh, Isabella," the voice crooned. "It's time. Come to me."
She emerged from the bed, confused as she surveyed the room. The walls were stone, thick and dark, as was the floor. She glanced down at the long white nightgown that was made of a soft, thin material.
This was not her room.
She heard the voice again calling her name, seductive as he sang out, "Isabella, come out, come out now. I'm waiting for you."
She moved to the window and peered down below to the man standing in the grass. He was illuminated by the moonlight, his face revealed as he tipped it back to stare up at her. His eyes held her even from a distance, their dark depths full of promises about things she couldn't even contemplate, if she'd only come to him.
He raised a hand, crooking a finger, and beckoning her in silence, and she couldn't seem to look away. She found herself nodding, entranced, moving without conscious thought. Barefoot, the stone beneath her feet was cold as she walked down hallways and passages she'd never seen that were still hauntingly familiar. She descended to where he waited.
His mouth turned up in a smile that made her shiver as she emerged onto the lawn and stood before him. He moved towards her, his fingers ghosting against the side of her face, not quite touching.
"I've waited for you for so long," he murmured. "So very long. And now, now you're mine."
A part of her mind protested that she wasn't his, that she wasn't even sure who he was or why she was here, but there was a stronger pull inside, a visceral tether that made her nod and step closer so she was nearly touching him. The proximity soothed her and she took a breath. His smile deepened.
"That's right, my sweet, come closer."
She was filled with a longing that was unreasonable and irrational, but so sharp and intense that she gave in and followed. She needed him to touch her now. Her head lolled to the side, baring her neck in the moonlight.
He obliged her, his fingers following the line of her throat, cool against her skin, and she gasped, the tiny points of contact lighting up her body.
"More," she heard herself beg, boldly pressing herself against him now.
"Say it," he growled, his arms now encasing her, making her feel whole, complete with what she hadn't realized she was lacking. "Who do you belong to?"
"You. I'm yours."
He cradled her head in his hand and descended, smooth lips meeting skin. She felt the press of sharp teeth against her flesh as she finally understood what he wanted.
Her blood.
\/ \/
Bella sat up in bed with a start, hands clutching at her throat as she felt the skin there still intact and unbroken. She took a deep breath, trying to calm her heart that seemed about to pound out of her chest.
"Bella? You okay?" a sleepy voice asked from the other side of the dorm room.
A lamp light clicked on, and Bella covered her eyes at the sudden brightness.
"I'm sorry, Rose. Bad dream. I didn't mean to wake you.” She stood up, feeling with her toes for her bedroom slippers. “I'm just going to go get some water."
"Was it zombies?" Rose asked, as she rolled back over. "Ever since Emmett dragged us to that haunted house last weekend, I've been dreaming they want my brains."
Bella laughed. "No, no zombies. Go back to sleep."
She grabbed a cup and her robe, and quietly shut the door behind her as she shuffled into the hallway and towards the bathroom. It was deserted for once, the fluorescents casting a sickly glow on the white tile. Filling her cup halfway at one of the sinks, she watched herself in the mirror as she slowly sipped.
It had felt so real.
She touched her neck again, the blue vein just barely visible beneath the skin. What was her mind trying to tell her with that gothic bodice ripper of a dream?
She'd been in an old house, like some kind of English country manor, or maybe even an old castle with all that stone. Where had that come from? Maybe she'd been reading too much Austen, or a few too many of those fluffy Regency romances she liked to buy now and then in the grocery checkout.
And the man. No, not a man. A vampire. Her skin prickled as she closed her eyes and remembered his face. He'd been beautiful, his face like some kind of fallen angel. And those eyes. She'd been mesmerized by them, willing to acquiesce to any request.
Weren't vampires suppose to be a metaphor for sex? Maybe that's what her subconscious was trying to draw to her attention. Sex. Or the lack thereof in her life.
She looked at her reflection, cheeks now flushed, and shook her head. Zombie dreams would be so much simpler.
\/ \/
The next morning, she dragged herself back to her dorm room post-shower, still toweling her hair. It was a good thing it was finally Friday. Between pulling an all-nighter on Tuesday for a procrastinated paper and staggering in after two last night, her sleep deprivation was reaching epic levels. No wonder she was having weird dreams.
“No hot water?” Rose asked, as Bella sat her shower supplies down and started rummaging in her closet.
“Of course not. If you don't get up at the crack of dawn like you do to go running, it always gets used up.” Bella rolled her shoulders. “I could have used something better than lukewarm today, too. I'm going to need to set up a caffeine drip to stay awake today.”
“So what did you dream about last night?” Rose asked, fussing with the coffee maker as she measured out the ground beans precisely. “You looked pretty freaked.”
Bella shrugged and stared longingly at the coffee pot as it began to rumble. “Nothing really. You know those dreams where you're you, but you're not you? Like you're in somebody else's dream?”
Rose raised an eyebrow. “Like you're Lindsay Lohan or something?”
Bella shivered. “Now that would be a nightmare. Kind of like that. It's like you're in LiLo's body, but you're still Rose in your mind. Have you had those?”
She pulled a mug out, pacing over to the coffee maker as a knock sounded on their door. It swung open before either of them could respond and Jessica popped her head in the room. “Hey Rose, can I borrow your red sweater today?”
“The one that make your boobs like bigger?” Rose asked, motioning her inside. “Which hottie are you trying to impress now?”
Jessica pretended to look offended as she bounced into the room. “It doesn't have to be about a guy, you know.”
“But it is,” Bella muttered, pouring the dark liquid that had finally finished percolating into her mug and inhaling deeply.
“Fine, fine. It's Mike, okay. He's cute, and I'm guessing having a big guy at your side can't be a bad thing with girls disappearing from campus and all.”
She tossed the campus newspaper on to Bella's bed, the headline practically jumping off the page as she stabbed it with her finger. “No Leads on Missing Student. What kind of campus safety is that?”
Bella picked up the paper, skimming the text under the headline. “Amy Moore. Sophomore. Lived off campus with three roommates. She didn't come home on Wednesday night.” She tossed the paper back to Jessica. “So what? This one over there disappears with Em about every other weekend and I don't file a missing persons report.”
Rose shrugged and nodded. “Does she have a boyfriend?”
Jessica picked the paper back up. “There was some guy she'd just started dating, but her roommates hadn't met him. They weren't very close with her - they all just moved in together this year.” Her eyes widened. “Do you think there's a serial killer on campus?”
Bella groaned. “C'mon, Jess. This Amy girl's probably love shacked up with her new dude and she'll resurface by Monday. Who knows? You wear that red sweater and flash your cleavage at Mike just right, and we may be trying to find where you disappeared to this weekend.”
Jessica smiled. “So true.” She snatched up the sweater. “Thanks again, Rose. See you later.”
The door shut behind her and Bella shook her head, taking a long sip from her mug. “Way too much energy first thing in the morning. How does she do it?”
“I hear you,” Rose replied, sipping her own coffee. “So what was the dream again?”
Bella shook her head. “It wasn't anything big. It was in some big old drafty house, like something out of Masterpiece Theater, and there was this guy.”
“Oh,” Rose interjected, wiggling her eyebrows. “One of those kind of dreams, huh? Was there bodice ripping? No wonder you sounded all breathless when you woke up.”
Bella snorted. “Yeah, I wish. No, he was kind of . . . not stalking, but like, calling me to him. And it was like I had to go to where he was waiting for me.” And he was a vampire who called me his and bit me, her brain finished silently, but she bit her tongue. Rose would probably just tell her she'd watched too many tv shows about dreamy vampires. “And then I woke up.”
“Doesn't sound that scary to me. At least he didn't try to eat your brains,” Rose said. “Was he creepy or something?”
“Yeah, I guess you could say that.” And beautiful. Bella stood up and started shoving books in her bag. “It was just weird. I hate having those kind of dreams. They just always throw me, make me feel outside myself.”
Rose picked up her own bag. “Huh. I don't think I've ever had one like that. I always have those falling dreams? The ones where they say if you hit the bottom you'll die?”
“I think that's a myth, Rose.”
“I don't want to find out. I've gotten lucky so far,” Rose replied. “I always wake up.” She grabbed up her phone as it started to vibrate. “Em's outside. Want to walk up to main campus with us?”
Bella grabbed her jacket. “Sure. Let's go.” She poured the rest of her coffee in her thermos to give her a little caffeine boost throughout the morning.
“They're having a party at Em's house tonight. You gonna come with?” Rose asked, as she turned to lock the door behind them.
Bella frowned. “It's not that I don't want to, but I'm beat, Rose, and tomorrow . . .”
“You need to go see her again?”
Bella nodded. “It's just the last few times I've gone, she hasn't been so great. She doesn't really know who I am, but I still think she likes it when I'm there.”
Rose put her arm around her, giving her a sideways hug. “I'm sorry, Bells. I know that's tough to see your Gram that way. I just worry about you sometimes.” She lowered her voice. “All work and no play make Bella a dull girl.”
Bella laughed. “Rose, that's the worst Jack Nicholson impression I think I've ever heard.”
“Made you laugh though,” Rose said as she bounced ahead. “Now come on. Emmett told me he thinks he's found the guy for you. He's one of the new transfers on the football team - and get this, he's an English major like you. Perfect, huh? He was going to introduce you tonight at the party, but maybe we can have lunch together today instead? Low key, no pressure, I promise.”
“Rose, c'mon,” Bella protested. “You guys know I hate setups.”
Rose shook her head, clearly not taking no for an answer. “Bella, what's one lunch going to hurt? We'll be there - it won't be like a blind date or something. Or do you just prefer dream guys?”
Bella sighed. “Fine. Lunch. But you better not bail halfway through, like you did with that Justin dude. He would not shut up about his fantasy draft round picks.”
Rose grinned. “We wouldn't dream of it.”
\/ \/
The moon was bright, illuminating the lawn below. She stood at the window, the stone sill cool beneath her fingers, and stared out across the manicured, precisely laid out grounds that descended to a small lake. A set of oddly set stones stood beside it, almost monolithic as they rose from the ground like crude approximations of the columns of a temple.
They seemed out of place among the trimmed hedges and shining white follies whose small roofs peeked out among the gardens.
Her attention was distracted by movement below, a single rider on a dark horse sweeping up the road towards the house. She knew who it was, could feel it in her bones with every clop of the horse hooves that brought him closer.
He'd come for her. He would always come for her.
She didn't know why she was certain of that, but the knowledge seemed to permeate her bones.
The horse roared to a stop beneath her, and she watched as he slid off, giving a pat to the magnificent beast's neck and whispering something in its ear before it tore back down the road, riderless now. He turned his attention to her, looking straight up as though he knew precisely where she was, precisely where she'd be waiting.
“Isabella? Won't you come to me?”
His words rang in her ears as though he were standing beside her, and even as she backed away from the window, she still felt the force of his gaze. She turned back to her bed, curling onto the mattress and pulling the coverlet around her as a shiver swept through her. Trying to fight the inevitable seemed pointless, and yet she hated this desire to rush to him that she couldn't seem to control.
“My sweet, it is only a matter of time.”
It surged inside her again, the longing that had drawn her to the window to wait for his arrival, but she still resisted. She threw the blanket away, ignoring the coolness of the night as she turned to the door and began to move, feet navigating hallways and stairs until she found the passage she was looking for. Small and unassuming, she slipped out the narrow doorway, into the gardens, and away from him.
She wouldn't be his to command.
The moon seemed dimmer now, clouds drifting across the sky and leaving everything in shadow. The small gravel lining the pathways bit into her bare feet, and she found herself creeping onto the soft grass. She didn't know where she was going, but she needed to keep moving.
“Why do you run from me, Isabella?”
Her throat seemed dry and unable to produce sound as she heard the crunch of steps behind her. She turned to find him regarding her intently. The little light left him a creature of shadow, the sharp angles of his face just barely visible, but she knew he was staring straight at her.
“I know what you want,” she finally managed to choke out.
The shadows shifted and she realized he was smiling now as he stepped closer.
“Do you now?” he asked. “But have you realized yet that it's what you want as well?”
She tried to shake her head, but the closer he came, the harder it seemed to move.
“Why do you make me wait so long, my sweet?” he asked. “This was meant to be.”
The tall hedge was at her back, and his arms now boxed her in as he stepped closed. He touched her cheek gently, the back of his hand sliding beneath her chin and forcing her to meet his gaze.
“So soft,” he murmured. “So fine.”
She wanted to look away, but the enchantment she'd been fighting seemed to wind around her and him like a silken rope. She found herself nodding as he spoke again.
“Who do you belong to, Isabella?” he asked, his lips tracing across the skin of her throat. “Tell me you're mine.”
It was more plea than order, but she had only one answer. “Yours,” she responded, letting her eyes close as she waited for it.
His lips touched her skin, and then she felt the bite.
\/ \/
Bella jerked awake, a cold sweat washing over her. The clock dial glowed quarter after two, and Rose's bed was still empty. She could hear people outside in the hallway, returning from last call and parties winding down.
It hadn't been real.
She say up and fumbled for her lamp, her free hand touching her throat. It had felt like it though. She'd always been a vivid dreamer, and she often found herself in what seemed to be someone else's body in those dreams, but this - this was almost surreal. She'd felt that bite, the sharp sear of pain mingled with something . . . less painful. Almost exhilarating.
The golden glow of the light that flooded the room made her feel calmer, and she slipped out of bed, kneeling in front of the mini-fridge and fumbling for a bottle of water. She rolled the cold container against her forehead, breathing slowly and hoping her heart would stop pounding.
The door behind her rattled and she turned as Emmett stumbled into the room, a giggling Rose slung over his shoulder.
“Bella! We missed you tonight,” Emmett said, sliding her unsteady roommate off his shoulder. “Look at you, you're still up. You should have come.”
Bella shook her head. “Just woke up, Em. I'm not like Rose. I need my beauty sleep.”
Rose, whose mascara had smudged into a raccoon-like state, blew a raspberry at her. “Please. You're pretty, Bella. Tommy thought so.” She turned to her boyfriend. “Didn't he, Em? He kept talking about you tonight.” She squared her shoulders and lowered her voice. “Bella's hot. I'd do her.” She giggled again and flopped back on the bed.
Bella rolled her eyes. “Can you tell your girlfriend ixnay on the impressions, Em. She's not so great at them.”
Emmett laughed as he picked up Rose's foot and started unzipping her boots. “She's so cute when she does them, though.” He tossed one boot down and started working on the other. “The house was a wreck after the party, and Tyler had some skank up in our room. You mind if I crash here tonight?”
“No, it's good. I have to be up early though.”
Emmett nodded. “You know this one's gonna be cranky in the a.m. You'll probably want to be gone before she wakes up.” He chuckled and dropped a kiss on Rose's forehead. “I try to tell her she can't handle jello shots, but she never listens.”
Bella watched as he carefully maneuvered her roommate onto the bed. Why couldn't she find a guy like Em? Even in her dreams the guys were after only one thing.
“Night, Em,” she said, curling back up in her bed and hoping for at least a few hours of uninterrupted sleep.