(no subject)
I found him when I picked up my book to put it in my bag as I was about to leave for my meeting, and I didn't know what to do because I can't kill. I just can't. But I also definitely can't sleep with a roach in my room. I went out and told Dashe, "Daaashe . . . there's a roach in my room . . ." and he came in with the killer spray, but the roach had disappeared, and I thought he had wedged himself under my bed, but Dashe didn't want to look, and I had to leave.
So then when I got home from class, I lifted the bed and THERE HE WAS.
And I was home alone.
So I moved everything out of the way and got the spray and sprayed him AHHHH!
But then he scurried behind some boards and things I had propped against the wall, so I figured I'd just let him be, and maybe sleep on the couch tonight, but then i was rearranging stuff and I saw him belly-up back there, and I could not stop . . . I don't know, shivering? I couldn't stand it. I left my room for ten minutes, just creepy crawly gross and guilty feeling, and then I came back with a cup and looked just as quickly as I could to figure out where to put the cup, then I looked away and reached over and left him in there, completely disgusted with myself, until Dashe and Al came home. They scooped him up and flushed him down the toilet.
Now i'm washing everything I own. I mean, not my clothes hanging in the closet, but everything from my bed, which is three full comforters, two small blankets, three pillowcases, and sheets. And I had already begun a load of laundry before this happened, so that's a lot of laundry.
The only good that has come from this saga is that now I am making sure my room is really EXCEPTIONALLY clean, which I do fairly often anyway, but it always feels good. The problem is that I've spent the entire night cleaning now, when I had told myself I wanted to go immediately to bed after class so I can get up and go to school at 7am. I have been setting these bedtime goals for myself lately, and it never works. When I was in Long Island, every night I'd plan to be asleep by midnight, and I don't think I managed to sleep before 2:30 once. Since I've returned, I've been telling myself to be in bed by 1:00, and I haven't made it yet. Tonight I wanted to be in bed by 10:30 so I can get up early and get some more good work time in the studio before class starts. Now, hello, it's 12:30. The cockroach saga is the perpetrator in this case, but usually it's just . . . I don't know. Eight parts insomnia and two parts distraction.
The meeting was with someone who is helping me figure out the logistics of leaving/staying at MICA.
I should know in two or three days if there's ANY chance MICA is willing to give me more money now that I'm seriously "threatening" to leave. You'd think a school wouldn't want to lose its students. Especially good students. I'm not a GREAT student, but you never know what people might become. I also have to decide if I want to withdraw from the metals class and take the W on my transcript or stick it out and take the F.
After the meeting, I had about two and a half hours of really super-focused work in the studio before class started. I made a whole bunch of progress on my final model for tomorrow's class. Like, A WHOLE lot of progress. It's starting to look really good, and man, I don't even usually think my own work looks decent. The pain in the ass is going to be making all the stairs. I think I have to suck up and do it tomorrow. Two flights of 18 steps and one flight of 36, and the model's in quarter inch scale.
Then, for I think only the second time in the semester, I took my dinner break. I took a shortened one, but it still counted; I still stopped working and left the studio. Dan came up to MICA and got a vegan turkey sandwich from Cafe Doris, and he liked it. It's really nice to have someone who will go out of his way to spend time with me. That makes me feel very special.
Dan likes to speak in Spanish when we're hanging out (like, speak nonstop for ten minutes, just anything he wants in Spanish) because it makes me giggle because of his silly facial expressions and the simple fact that I do not understand 90% of what he's saying. And he just doesn't stop. I get really frustrated after a while, because I just want to have normal conversation with him, but at the same time, I can't stop laughing. It's like being tickled. Verbal tickling.
I know there are hundreds of things I've been waiting to say (no entries for two days! How strange for meee), but of course now I'm too zonked out to remember any of the important stuff.
I would post Circle Pit Fest stuff, but everyone who reads this either lives nowhere near here or already knows everything about it and is definitely going.
I've taken off Friday night and all day Saturday from work so I can chill the fuck out and enjoy CP Fest. Fun!
Oh, I completely rearranged my room tonight, and I packed up four small boxes of things to mail to myself in Cleveland. I am following through with my plan! That's a great thing that I don't always do very well. I make a lot of plans, but do not always pursue them. Apparently that's something about being a Gemini, but I consider it more being slightly lazy and slightly apathetic when it comes to certain things.
I have been drinking about three cups of hot chocolate every day, and I have been noticing that I am not the only one putting on winter weight. I think maybe that's just a natural human defense against winter. But it's still funny and cute to see people bulking up. I'm just not excited about bulking up myself. But I can't stop drinking hot chocolate, which is basically just sugar. Ohhhh well.
Oh, and I have been carrying my purse, which I refer to as "my girl piece." I have been carrying my girl piece. I don't like not having my backpack, and I don't like having to hold something in my hand, but there's also something to be said for this small system of containment. It is very space efficient, and involves very minimal searching when trying to locate something. And somehow it's big enough that I can put a book and some papers and my hat and my scarf and . . . all sorts of little odds and ends in it. Oh, that girl piece. What a charmer.
I think I should stop, huh. Nighty night.