A Way With Words - Diary entry - April 21, 2014 (2)

May 08, 2014 09:12

Knew something was up when I saw how Jenny was pinging all over the house Saturday afternoon, cleaning everything in sight. Even her own room. She didn’t notice Jack was tense and neither of them could see my heart was turning every which way as I tossed spices around in the kitchen.

When the doorbell rang she nearly tripped running to answer. I was at the stove and heard his voice. Fact that he sounded 100% North American calmed me. Jack was already standing next to her when I came out in the hall. She said, This is my dad. Jack shook his hand then turned to me. She said, And this is my….other dad.  The pause is when I realized she forgot to mention the gay dads again. When’s she gonna remember it’s not such a regular no big deal thing in other parts?

Barindra was cool about it. Vancouver’s a big mishmash of people so nothing surprises him, turns out. And he’s in choreography of course. But I couldn’t say more than Hey because my throat had seized up. The voice was different but the eyes… Exactly the same. The skin, the hair. The body. He sniffed the air, smiled and his face said, Home. I ducked back in the kitchen and tried to get calm.

They all went in the living room. Jack came in to get beer from the fridge. Said, Get out there. So I went. Barindra said to Jack, So you were my father’s lawyer? Like we planned, Jack said yes, because it was simpler. Said, I’m sorry to hear you lost him so young. What happened?

Barindra said his father drank a lot. He never seemed happy. One night he crashed the car, right into a wall. He wasn’t wearing a seatbelt, for once. I thought of Kaj’s handsome face, smashing into the windshield. I was sitting next to Jack on the couch and lost it. Slumped back, felt my own face crumpling. Jack put his arm around me and pulled me to him.

Jack says at that moment he saw Barindra get that look, the one that must’ve come over my face once, a long time ago, when the last puzzle piece dropped into place and everything made sense.

Chapter 62 >>
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