(oneshot) seven things that happen when 2PM go to hogwarts
seven things that happen when 2PM go to hogwarts
2PM, gen
crack, pg-13
The entire world implodes as Nichkhun is sorted in Slytherin.
--
The first thing Chansung does is take one, long look at each and every House, before plopping himself on the Gryffindor table and proceeding to eat the entire roast beef by himself.
Ron Weasley looks mildly impressed.
--
Junsu thinks the reason they were shipped off to Hogwarts was to provide a more tasteful alternative to the Sorting Song.
He promptly shoves Professor Flitwick off the stage and proceeds to belt out soulful lyrics about companionship and unity he's thinking on adding onto the next 2PM album.
Junsu is mistaken as Professor Snape orders Filch to throw him out of the Great Hall.
--
The entire world implodes as Nichkhun is sorted in Slytherin.
Junho and Wooyoung quaver in their seats (over by the Hufflepuff table) as Nichkhun sits down next to Draco Malfoy, sparkling. He beams at his fellow housemates, who stare disgustedly at the amount of cuteness that radiates from the Thai boy (because, what the fuck?). Taecyeon whimpers from the Ravenclaw table. Chansung even stops eating (which meant the world really was collapsing on itself).
Nichkhun is oblivious to the worldwide catastrophes around him, and strikes up a conversation with Pansy Parkinson about love potions.
"You're not evil, are you hyung?" Wooyoung asks later on.
Nichkhun sniffs.
"Of course not, you Hufflepuffs!" he pouts adorably (Draco Malfoy looks on proudly), and Junho sighs in relief, because an adorable, pouting puppy couldn't possibly want to side with You Know Who.
"Khunnie!” Crabbe and Goyle bound up to Nichkhun, slinging their arms around his shoulders like he was their Ron to their Harry. “Let's go! McGonagall's about to get to her next class!"
Nichkhun beams.
"Okay!"
Wooyoung and Junho exchange nervous looks.
"W-what are you going to do to her?"
Nichkhun blinks innocently.
"Oh, it’s nothing. I'm just going to seduce her and then blackmail her into giving all the Slytherins O's in Transfiguration. I'll see you guys later!"
Junho gapes.
"Oh my God, he is evil!"
--
Taecyeon, to no avail, attempts to find some manga in the Hogwarts Library.
"I could lend you some, if you want" Cho Chang shyly offers.
Taecyeon flashes her a toothy smile.
"That'd be great!"
The next day, he finds his dorm flooded with books and Owl me scribbled on a note pasted on top of his head.
It turns out it was Hermione Granger's owl.
"I don’t get it. What does he have that I don't?" Ron grumbles to Harry later that day, as he watches Taecyeon and Hermione giggle over the newest Skip Beat.
"Well, let's see" Harry deadpans. "He's tall, handsome, has great teeth, and I hear he's pretty famous throughout Asia"
Ron puffs out his chest indignantly.
"Well, I'm pretty famous throughout here! Hello, Best Friend of Harry Potter anyone?"
"Yeah, but I don't see you getting bloody period letters"
--
Wooyoung is like the new Cedric Diggory.
He’s had rabid fangirls before, but none of them were magical. He has to watch what he eats, drinks, even touches, because of the amount of love potions and spells that find their way into his everything.
Wooyoung, to put it simply, is afraid for his fucking life.
And he should be, apparently no one is immune to Wooyoung’s charms. One morning Bellatrix Lestrange bursts into the Great Hall and abducts him before he could eat his breakfast (which was laced with Parvati Patil’s love potion).
It takes two weeks for the Golden Trio and the 2PM boys to find him in some abandoned cemetery, whimpering in a corner as Bellatrix attempts to convince him to join the Death Eaters.
--
Junho, as it turns out, is surprisingly the best Seeker Hogwarts has ever seen.
He has the quickest reflexes and unbeatable stamina, and even the almighty Harry Potter will concede to him. He’s practically the reason Hufflepuff won the Quidditch Cup (and had the best chants, which he proudly composed by himself, so suck on that, Junsu).
“How do you do it?” Harry asks Junho, panting after a particularly exhausting match.
Junho gives him an eye-crinkling smile, radiating energy despite being Bludgered quite a number of times (he thinks his nose might be broken, but Madam Pomfrey will fix it right up).
“Obviously you haven’t been through JYP dance camp”
--
Jaebum demands to be transferred to Hogwarts from Seattle, because according to him, it wasn’t fair his boys were getting British ass and he wasn’t.
He refuses to wear black robes, opting for a pink muscle shirt and obscenely tight jeans. He puts the moves on any breathing female (”Hey Professor McGonagall, do you want to see my wand?”) and it feels like he’s never left.
Except when he hits on the pretty redhead sitting next to Harry Potter.
“Hey Ginny, I'd like to get my basilisk into your chamber of secrets.”
The last thing Jaebum sees is a bright green flash.
--
2PM, gen
crack, pg-13
The entire world implodes as Nichkhun is sorted in Slytherin.
--
The first thing Chansung does is take one, long look at each and every House, before plopping himself on the Gryffindor table and proceeding to eat the entire roast beef by himself.
Ron Weasley looks mildly impressed.
--
Junsu thinks the reason they were shipped off to Hogwarts was to provide a more tasteful alternative to the Sorting Song.
He promptly shoves Professor Flitwick off the stage and proceeds to belt out soulful lyrics about companionship and unity he's thinking on adding onto the next 2PM album.
Junsu is mistaken as Professor Snape orders Filch to throw him out of the Great Hall.
--
The entire world implodes as Nichkhun is sorted in Slytherin.
Junho and Wooyoung quaver in their seats (over by the Hufflepuff table) as Nichkhun sits down next to Draco Malfoy, sparkling. He beams at his fellow housemates, who stare disgustedly at the amount of cuteness that radiates from the Thai boy (because, what the fuck?). Taecyeon whimpers from the Ravenclaw table. Chansung even stops eating (which meant the world really was collapsing on itself).
Nichkhun is oblivious to the worldwide catastrophes around him, and strikes up a conversation with Pansy Parkinson about love potions.
"You're not evil, are you hyung?" Wooyoung asks later on.
Nichkhun sniffs.
"Of course not, you Hufflepuffs!" he pouts adorably (Draco Malfoy looks on proudly), and Junho sighs in relief, because an adorable, pouting puppy couldn't possibly want to side with You Know Who.
"Khunnie!” Crabbe and Goyle bound up to Nichkhun, slinging their arms around his shoulders like he was their Ron to their Harry. “Let's go! McGonagall's about to get to her next class!"
Nichkhun beams.
"Okay!"
Wooyoung and Junho exchange nervous looks.
"W-what are you going to do to her?"
Nichkhun blinks innocently.
"Oh, it’s nothing. I'm just going to seduce her and then blackmail her into giving all the Slytherins O's in Transfiguration. I'll see you guys later!"
Junho gapes.
"Oh my God, he is evil!"
--
Taecyeon, to no avail, attempts to find some manga in the Hogwarts Library.
"I could lend you some, if you want" Cho Chang shyly offers.
Taecyeon flashes her a toothy smile.
"That'd be great!"
The next day, he finds his dorm flooded with books and Owl me scribbled on a note pasted on top of his head.
It turns out it was Hermione Granger's owl.
"I don’t get it. What does he have that I don't?" Ron grumbles to Harry later that day, as he watches Taecyeon and Hermione giggle over the newest Skip Beat.
"Well, let's see" Harry deadpans. "He's tall, handsome, has great teeth, and I hear he's pretty famous throughout Asia"
Ron puffs out his chest indignantly.
"Well, I'm pretty famous throughout here! Hello, Best Friend of Harry Potter anyone?"
"Yeah, but I don't see you getting bloody period letters"
--
Wooyoung is like the new Cedric Diggory.
He’s had rabid fangirls before, but none of them were magical. He has to watch what he eats, drinks, even touches, because of the amount of love potions and spells that find their way into his everything.
Wooyoung, to put it simply, is afraid for his fucking life.
And he should be, apparently no one is immune to Wooyoung’s charms. One morning Bellatrix Lestrange bursts into the Great Hall and abducts him before he could eat his breakfast (which was laced with Parvati Patil’s love potion).
It takes two weeks for the Golden Trio and the 2PM boys to find him in some abandoned cemetery, whimpering in a corner as Bellatrix attempts to convince him to join the Death Eaters.
--
Junho, as it turns out, is surprisingly the best Seeker Hogwarts has ever seen.
He has the quickest reflexes and unbeatable stamina, and even the almighty Harry Potter will concede to him. He’s practically the reason Hufflepuff won the Quidditch Cup (and had the best chants, which he proudly composed by himself, so suck on that, Junsu).
“How do you do it?” Harry asks Junho, panting after a particularly exhausting match.
Junho gives him an eye-crinkling smile, radiating energy despite being Bludgered quite a number of times (he thinks his nose might be broken, but Madam Pomfrey will fix it right up).
“Obviously you haven’t been through JYP dance camp”
--
Jaebum demands to be transferred to Hogwarts from Seattle, because according to him, it wasn’t fair his boys were getting British ass and he wasn’t.
He refuses to wear black robes, opting for a pink muscle shirt and obscenely tight jeans. He puts the moves on any breathing female (”Hey Professor McGonagall, do you want to see my wand?”) and it feels like he’s never left.
Except when he hits on the pretty redhead sitting next to Harry Potter.
“Hey Ginny, I'd like to get my basilisk into your chamber of secrets.”
The last thing Jaebum sees is a bright green flash.
--