(drabble) i lie awake to miss you
i lie awake to miss you
SJM/f(x), zhou mi/victoria
pg-13, ~ 480 words
But all she has is now (stolen kisses in dark corners, five minute phone calls in between interviews, IloveyouIloveyouseeyouinthreemonths) and she wishes it was more.
--
They don't see each other much anymore.
It's not like they expect much. After all, he's part of an internationally recognised band (well, unless we're talking to those obnoxious Only13 fans) and she's leader to an up-and-coming girl group.
But when their company decide for a f(SJM) collaboration, Victoria breathes, because despite the lyrics to memorise, the choreography to perfect, she finally gets to say his name and see the way his eyes light up when her lips curve around her Shandong accent.
"How was China? Did you see your family? How was the concert? Have they stopped with that Only13 nonsense yet? Did you-"
"I missed you too, Ah Qian"
She's partnered with Siwon (the unofficial leader of SJM since Hangeng left) and Luna dances with him but their eyes linger and his smile is soft and quiet and I'll-see-you-in-a-bit and that's enough for Victoria.
They're taking a break and Victoria slips out to grab everyone's lunches (because even if is Siwon is her sunbae, she's been a leader for longer) when a hand curls around her wrist and pulls her in a dark closet.
Zhou Mi sighs into her neck, his breath sending shivers down her spine as Victoria melts into his chest.
"It's been too long" he says softly.
Victoria doesn't say anything - doesn't need to. She simply holds him closer and it tells him everything he needs to know (I missed you, I wish you didn't always have to go, you look tired, didn't I tell you to take care of yourself? I love you).
Zhou Mi cups her face and their lips meet and oh, it really has been far too long since they've done this.
Victoria remembers their trainee days, of broken Korean and soft laughter. She remembers the days before debut, of tightly held hands and quiet determination.
But all she has is now (stolen kisses in dark corners, five minute phone calls in between interviews, IloveyouIloveyouseeyouinthreemonths) and she wishes it was more.
They break apart, breathing hard. Zhou Mi is trembling, his eyes shining (Iwantneedmoremoremore). His nails dig into the curve of her hip but she doesn't mind because this is the closest they've been in months. Victoria feels the back of her throat burning with tears.
"How long?" she whispers hoarsely.
Zhou Mi sighs ruefully, pressing his forehead against hers. They count their days by the moments in between schedules.
(They haven't even reached a day this year.)
"Three days. Two for the MV filming and one for performances, then we're back in Shanghai to promote the new single"
Victoria can feel tears clinging onto her eyelashes and reminds herself it'senoughit'senoughit'senough.
"Okay" she breathes.
The darkness doesn't hide how bright his eyes are (IloveyouIloveyoupleasewaitforme). Victoria breathes in the moment, etches it deep inside her heart and imprints in onto her soul.
It's enough for now (but not for forever).
--
SJM/f(x), zhou mi/victoria
pg-13, ~ 480 words
But all she has is now (stolen kisses in dark corners, five minute phone calls in between interviews, IloveyouIloveyouseeyouinthreemonths) and she wishes it was more.
--
They don't see each other much anymore.
It's not like they expect much. After all, he's part of an internationally recognised band (well, unless we're talking to those obnoxious Only13 fans) and she's leader to an up-and-coming girl group.
But when their company decide for a f(SJM) collaboration, Victoria breathes, because despite the lyrics to memorise, the choreography to perfect, she finally gets to say his name and see the way his eyes light up when her lips curve around her Shandong accent.
"How was China? Did you see your family? How was the concert? Have they stopped with that Only13 nonsense yet? Did you-"
"I missed you too, Ah Qian"
She's partnered with Siwon (the unofficial leader of SJM since Hangeng left) and Luna dances with him but their eyes linger and his smile is soft and quiet and I'll-see-you-in-a-bit and that's enough for Victoria.
They're taking a break and Victoria slips out to grab everyone's lunches (because even if is Siwon is her sunbae, she's been a leader for longer) when a hand curls around her wrist and pulls her in a dark closet.
Zhou Mi sighs into her neck, his breath sending shivers down her spine as Victoria melts into his chest.
"It's been too long" he says softly.
Victoria doesn't say anything - doesn't need to. She simply holds him closer and it tells him everything he needs to know (I missed you, I wish you didn't always have to go, you look tired, didn't I tell you to take care of yourself? I love you).
Zhou Mi cups her face and their lips meet and oh, it really has been far too long since they've done this.
Victoria remembers their trainee days, of broken Korean and soft laughter. She remembers the days before debut, of tightly held hands and quiet determination.
But all she has is now (stolen kisses in dark corners, five minute phone calls in between interviews, IloveyouIloveyouseeyouinthreemonths) and she wishes it was more.
They break apart, breathing hard. Zhou Mi is trembling, his eyes shining (Iwantneedmoremoremore). His nails dig into the curve of her hip but she doesn't mind because this is the closest they've been in months. Victoria feels the back of her throat burning with tears.
"How long?" she whispers hoarsely.
Zhou Mi sighs ruefully, pressing his forehead against hers. They count their days by the moments in between schedules.
(They haven't even reached a day this year.)
"Three days. Two for the MV filming and one for performances, then we're back in Shanghai to promote the new single"
Victoria can feel tears clinging onto her eyelashes and reminds herself it'senoughit'senoughit'senough.
"Okay" she breathes.
The darkness doesn't hide how bright his eyes are (IloveyouIloveyoupleasewaitforme). Victoria breathes in the moment, etches it deep inside her heart and imprints in onto her soul.
It's enough for now (but not for forever).
--