(no subject)
This is so true and yet sooo funny.
1) Turn signals will give away your next move. A real Boston driver
never uses them.
2) Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you
and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by somebody
else putting you in an even more dangerous situation.
3) Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane-change is considered
"going with the flow."
4) The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you
have of getting hit.
5) Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork.
6) Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that
your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake
pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch
your legs.
7) Electronic traffic warning signs are not there to provide useful
information. They are only there to make Boston look high-tech, and to
distract you from seeing the state police radar car parked on the median.
8) Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right.
9) Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions, and
are apparently not enforceable during rush hour.
10) Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident, or even if
someone is just changing a tire.
11) Throwing litter on the roads adds color to the landscape and gives
Adopt-a-Highway crews something to clean up.
12) It is assumed that state police cars passing at high speed may be
followed in the event you need to make up a few minutes on your way to
work, or the beach.
13) Heavy snow, ice, fog, and rain are no reasons to change any of the
previously listed rules. These weather conditions are God's way of
ensuring a natural selection process for body shops, junkyards, and new
vehicle sales.
1) Turn signals will give away your next move. A real Boston driver
never uses them.
2) Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you
and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by somebody
else putting you in an even more dangerous situation.
3) Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane-change is considered
"going with the flow."
4) The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you
have of getting hit.
5) Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork.
6) Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that
your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake
pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch
your legs.
7) Electronic traffic warning signs are not there to provide useful
information. They are only there to make Boston look high-tech, and to
distract you from seeing the state police radar car parked on the median.
8) Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right.
9) Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions, and
are apparently not enforceable during rush hour.
10) Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident, or even if
someone is just changing a tire.
11) Throwing litter on the roads adds color to the landscape and gives
Adopt-a-Highway crews something to clean up.
12) It is assumed that state police cars passing at high speed may be
followed in the event you need to make up a few minutes on your way to
work, or the beach.
13) Heavy snow, ice, fog, and rain are no reasons to change any of the
previously listed rules. These weather conditions are God's way of
ensuring a natural selection process for body shops, junkyards, and new
vehicle sales.