There's this guy named Kagiso at work from Botswana, Africa and he's kind of a chump and today he told me that if he was brutal, he would have killed me a long time ago. I felt so appreciated after that and I wanted to kiss his big bald African head. He reminds me of the awesome Chinese guy from Sixteen Candles. Molly Ringwald is a fox, for ( Read more... )

I'm just listening to A Tribe Called Quest and reading my Bob Dylan book.

HERE WE GO YO
HERE WE GO YO
SO WHAT'S THE WHAT'S THE
WHAT'S THE SCENERIO

I have to be up at seven o'olock in the morning but don't tell my biological clock that. That would be just too much for me to get a decent's night sleep. But I'm sure that I'll get more sleep than some other unfortunate critter tonight so I digress ( Read more... )

I just tried to update twice and it messed up so I give up.

WHO WANTS A PIECE OF THIS -- I'M LOCO IN THE CA BASA GRINGOS AND GRINGAS?

Ah yes, I'm alive and doing well, perhaps better than ever.

What do you call a half woodchuck, half eagle animal??

A woogle.

My twenty-five percent mexican heritage is worth absolutely nothing now because it doesn't prevent sunburns anymore. I think that I enjoyed seeing people more than actual bands this year at warped tour. Except for Andrew W.K. He rocked that shit. I felt better this morning than I have for awhile. Even with my Navajo like shoulder blades and ( Read more... )

I just flicked a spider off of the computer screen. It was a little guy. So little in fact that I thought it was a goober from the sneeze that just exited my body. My little arachnid buddy is just chilling by the printer now. I don't think I'll name him ( Read more... )

I slept in a weird position on my arm and now it feels like someone stabbed my massive gargantuan like the rolling hills of Scotland bicep. I need some Bengay or something. Or ICY HOT! I think that this will be the last sentence that I type.

I went jogging this morning like a lot of other mornings except this time a big black dog with big teeth chased me. When I stopped running it stopped running. It tilted it's little big black dog head to the left and licked my shin, then we proceeded to run three miles together. I named him Baloo.

Tonight is date night.

My dad emailed me again. I really don't know why he bothers. He's a short Mexican dude with a funny mustache and huge coke bottle glasses with velcro shoes and huge taco and burrito gut and busted up knee from playing high school football and he has fathered four kids by three different mothers but he's super religious and he votes Republican and ( Read more... )