Crush'd (3/4)
Title: Crush’d (Part 3/4)
Pairing: Onew/Taemin
Rating: R
Warnings: Violence/ Assault/ non-con/ domestic abuse/ violence
Final Word Count: 28136
The next morning, he woke to the sound of his phone ringing. It was Jonghyun and he wanted to get breakfast at Cafe E because his eight am was cancelled. Jinki agreed with an easy smile and dragged himself out of bed to get dressed. He was careful not to wake up Suho who was still sleeping. On the way out the door, he grabbed his phone and wallet and reached under his pillow to stroke the leather jacket resting there. He felt better about what had happened the night before after his epiphany in the shower.
He could tell already that it was going to be a good day.
When he reached the cafe, he saw that Jonghyun and Key were already there, wearing matching looks of regret. They were both sharing a pot of coffee and even though one of them was in fresh clothes, they both looked like they had been hit by eighteen wheelers.
Jinki seated himself warily. “I would ask what happened to you two last night, but I can’t talk to the dead.”
Kibum raised his hand palm out towards Jinki. “Zip it, old timer.”
Jonghyun lifted his head from where it had been resting against Kibum’s shoulder. “You look like you’re in a good mood today. How did your night go?”
Jinki’s expression went blank for a split second before he twisted his face into a mask of nonchalance. “It was alright. I went back to the dorm early and got more than eight hours of sleep for the first time in forever.”
Jonghyun nodded in understanding. “I’m jealous. I haven’t slept in days.” He laughed easily even though Jinki knew that it wasn’t an exaggeration.
Their waitress stopped by and asked if they were ready to order. Between the two of the them, Kibum and Jonghyun scraped up enough money for the three dollar endless pancake special. Jinki ordered two eggs, sunny side up. When their food arrived, Jinki made quick work of his food, stabbing viciously at the two yokes, letting them bleed all over the plate while Kibum and Jonghyun bickered about syrup.
Jinki could tell that it was going to be a good day.
~~~~
Jinki saw Taemin in the courtyard later on that day and was satisfied that Taemin hadn’t told anyone. His blonde hair was limper than normal and the collar of his shirt was pulled tightly around his throat, but other than that, Taemin could have won an oscar for his play at normalcy. He laughed along to jokes and fooled around like he usually did, convincing those around him that he was perfectly okay and that they had no cause to worry about him.
Jinki knew better, though. He knew because he and Taemin had a new closeness now that he didn’t have with other people. Because he and Taemin were so close and because Jinki knew Taemin so well, he could see the spots of fear bubbling on his face. It was in the way the corner of his lips are turned ever so slightly downward and in the way this shoulders are tensed, turned slightly away from his friends. Jinki frowned at the sadness pinching his features. Jinki wanted to see what other facial expressions he could make. He promised himself that he would put something happier there.
Jinki never intended to frighten him so much. He didn’t understand what had made him snap like he had the night before, but he swore that he would do something to fix it. He had only wanted to show Taemin how much he loved him and really, Taemin had seduced him. Taemin had been practically asking for it.
Still, the slight furrow of Taemin’s brow bothered Jinki, and he determined that he needed to do something to make Taemin stop looking so sad. He decided that surely, returning Taemin’s jacket to him would make him feel better.
Instead of eating dinner that night, Jinki slinked over to Taemin’s dorm. After spending so much time watching him, Jinki was very familiar with Taemin’s schedule and knew that he and his roommate would not be in their room for at least another hour. Their door was unlocked like always and Jinki slid into the room with little trouble, jacket in arm. Jinki did not waste time, slipping the jacket on the back of Taemin’s desk chair, giving it a final pat before exiting the room once more, stopping only to stroke Taemin’s pillow. With that done, Jinki headed to the library to work on his paper, texting Kibum along the way and asking if he was still on for game night.
~~~~~
One of the legs of Jonghyun’s kitchen table was slightly shorter than the others which made building a horse of cards incredibly difficult. Especially when Kibum kept knocking his leg against the table everytime he crossed them. Jinki thought he was doing it on purpose because he hated to see anyone do something better than he could.
Jonghyun returned from retrieving the pizza from the delivery person, slapping the greasy boxes down on the table and incidentally knocking over Jinki’s third attempt at a card tower.
Jinki sighed and decided not to waste the energy being mad.
Jonghyun didn’t hesitate to shove the pizza boxes open to reveal two steaming meat lovers pizzas, with extra meat. The sight of the ridiculous amounts of meat that they had made the pizzas look like a game of tetris gone wrong. Jinki’s stomach twisted a little bit and he politely declined when Jonghyun eagerly shoved some towards his face, urging him to eat.
Kibum wasn’t so polite, though, when Jonghyun offered him some. “Ew. Get that shit away from my face. I thought I told you cheese!” He scoffed and whipped out his phone immediately, furiously texting someone, cellphone charms swinging as violently as his eyebrow was twitching. He was probably ordering something else.
Jonghyun grinned at him, gums stuffed with ham and cheese. “My house my rules, Bum. Eat some, it’s good for you~” The last part is sung out to Kibum, waving the mess of sauce and dough in Kibum’s face for a second time.
Meanwhile, Jinki’s thoughts had drifted off to Taemin, thinking of how happy the boy would be to see his jacket. Jinki practically giggled at the thought, the noise bubbling in his throat and choking him.
Kibum raised a single scarred brow at Jinki, lips pierced in that way that told Jinki that he was being examined. “What’s gotten into you? You’re so...chipper today…”
His smile came easily to him in what felt like the first time in forever, mouth stretching the appropriate amount. “I’m just in a good mood.”
“That’s suspicious…”
Jonghyun interrupted Kibum’s interrogation, reaching around the table to wrap his arm around Jinki’s shoulder, mouth still full of pizza. “Ah leave him alone, Key. Let the boy be happy.” Jonghyun nodded to himself before he went back to eating.
Jinki carefully did not comment on the fact that he was older than Jonghyun and instead fixed his expression into a reassuring smile. “I’m just glad that the semester is almost over, am I right?”
That was apparently the correct thing to say because Kibum immediately launched into an involved description of his professor’s boils and how they were a threat to the safety of the school’s learning environment.
The rest of the night was passed listening to Kibum and Jonghyun argue about what constituted a safe learning environment followed by an impassioned speech delivered by Jonghyun about social justice.
It was a good night.
~~
On his way back to the dorm, Jinki took the route that would pass by Taemin’s window, hoping to catch a glimpse of the boy before heading to bed. Curiously enough, though, the window was drawn shut tightly. The curtains, though, were still left open so Jinki’s view wasn’t entirely blocked. Inside, Taemin was sleeping with the covers drawn over his head. Jinki thought it was odd because he had never done that before. He edged closer to the window, but before he could get too close, something caught his eye. If he followed the wall of Taemin’s building to the very front, he could see a trashcan sitting near the entrance to the dorm. Jinki must have passed it several times, but he has never noticed it before.
He noticed it that night though because there was something black and spiked sticking out of one side of the can, fluttering limply in the breeze. He inched towards it, eyes narrowing and brows drawing close together as he realized that it was the sleeve of the jacket that he had returned to Taemin just that day. His fingers twitched as they reached out, curving around the fabric and clenching it tightly in his fist.
He was angry all at once at the offense. The jacket had been a kind gesture of Jinki’s. He had hoped that returning the jacket to Taemin would have made him feel happy that Jinki cared enough about him to do so. Instead, it appeared that Taemin was ungrateful, thoughtlessly casting aside Jinki’s thoughtless actions like they meant nothing to him. His nails were biting into the fabric and his teeth were grinding painfully together, but Jinki did not care.
Like the flip of a switch, though, Jinki was calmed, once more, twisting his lips into a smile that still held a tinge of anger. Taemin was obviously upset. He wasn’t thinking clearly. Surely he would regret throwing away an article of clothing that would serve to remind him of their time together. He pulled it from the trashcan, dusting it off lightly before folding it over his arm. He would return it to Taemin the next chance he got, after giving him some time to calm down. He lifted the material to his nose and past the stench that it had acquired from its time spent in the trashcan, he could pick up the hint of tobacco and cinnamon and Taemin.
~~~
Jinki decided that he would attempt to return Taemin’s jacket, again, the next day after class. A clear view into Taemin’s room was prevented by the heavy blackout curtains that covered it and his door was locked for the first time since Jinki had been seeing him. Jinki was annoyed at first, nails biting into the skin of his hands, but then calmed himself and devised a plan. He glanced down the hall, scanning each door, until he located the one that must have belonged to the hall’s RA based on the decorative signs that covered it.
He knocked three times and made sure to smile sheepishly when the RA answered. The girl must have just woken up judging from the way that she sleepily rubbed at her eyes, t-shirt falling off of one shoulder. It was perfect, really, Jinki mused, because she would be too tired to really question him.
He laughed shyly. “Sorry for waking you up! I’m a friend of Taemin’s. He lives on this hall and he borrowed my math textbook. I really need it back before class.” He clasped his hands together, silently begging. “His door is locked right now and I really need that book! I have class in a few minutes!”
He could tell that she was slightly suspicious but after a moment or two of looking Jinki over and determining that a guy who wore bowties and loafers seriously couldn’t be that much of a threat, she nodded reluctantly and disappeared back into the room to retrieve her master key. Jinki made sure that he looked harmless, like he wouldn’t hurt a fly.
They made their way over to Taemin’s door and within two minutes, Jinki was inside and the RA had returned to her room with a warning not to hang around for too long. Jinki assured her that he wouldn’t be but a minute.
The first thing he did was fish Taemin’s leather jacket out of his backpack, folding it and placing it neatly at the foot of the bed. Next came a bag of chips that he had heard Taemin say he wanted to eat the other day, laying them on top of the jacket. Finally, Jinki retrieved a box of those little heart shaped candies that had cheesy statements printed on their surface. He giggled at the romance of it all.
Before he left, he dug one of Taemin’s shirts out of his laundry basket, lifting the fabric to his nose and breathing deeply, soaking in the stench of tobacco and cinnamon and the marijuana that Jinki had smelled on him before.
Once he was satisfied, he tossed the shirt back into the hamper and gulped in fresh air, Taemin’s scent still suffocating him. He adjusted himself in his pants and picked up the backpack that he must have laid down at some point, making sure the door would lock behind him before shutting it tightly, satisfied that Taemin would be pleased with the presents that he had left for him.
~~~
Jinki went three days without seeing Taemin and it nearly killed him. Taemin no longer spent time in the courtyard. He didn’t linger outside of classrooms. He didn’t study in the library. His window was blocked and the room to his door remained immovable. It was torturous to Jinki who had spent nearly everyday for the better part of the semester admiring Taemin’s beauty and growing closer and closer to the boy.
Jinki knew that it was an intentional avoidance. It made him angry to entertain the thought, but he knew that it was true. He was filled with rage at the idea that he had devoted so much of his time to worshipping Taemin only to be met with cool rejection.
But then he thought of the way Taemin’s eyes glittered in the sunlight and the way his lips curled into an easy smile and Jinki was calm, once again. He determined that he just needed to show Taemin how much he loved him. Obviously Taemin didn’t understand just how far Jinki was willing to go for him. When classes were done for the day, he waited near the entrance to Taemin’s building, just out of sight. He knew that Taemin had to leave at some point to go to the fitness center as a member of the swim team. He just had to wait for the right moment to approach him.
It didn’t take long. Taemin emerged right on time though he did look more skittish than usual. He was glancing around him, checking to make sure that no one was there, once he was satisfied that he was alone, he slowly made his way to the large gym looming in the distance. He was unaware that Jinki was following him several meters behind. He never suspected that Jinki would even have access to the fitness room at that hour.
Jinki decided to wait for him in the showers. He was less likely to be found there as the fitness center, itself, had a few security cameras set up to ensure that no one would hurt themselves during late night workouts. He had a hoodie drawn tightly around his face so that he wouldn’t be recognizable. Not that campus safety even looked at the video footage unless there was a complaint.
He decided to wait in the steam room until Taemin was done working out. He didn’t want Taemin to know that anyone else was in the showers with him. He didn’t want to give Taemin the chance to reject him.
It didn’t take long for Taemin to tiptoe into the room. Unlike before where Taemin had entered the room with confidence, head held high, now he was defeated and withdrawn, still living in the shadows of their previous encounter.
It pained Jinki to see him that way and he felt regret bubbling in his throat. He hadn’t meant to upset Taemin so much. It was just that he couldn’t control himself, and really, Taemin should have known better than to seduce people if he didn’t want to follow through with his silent promises.
Jinki would show him tonight. He would make Taemin understand.
The tiles were cool against Jinki’s feet as he carefully made his way to Taemin’s stall. He was careful that his bare toes didn’t slap against the floor and he steadied his breath which he hadn’t noticed had gone erratic. His heart was beating frantically but he imagined what his future with Taemin could be like and the thought gave him courage. He slid his hand in between the stall door and the wall, cautiously undoing the latch and slipping into the shower.
At first, Taemin was unaware of him, scrubbing soap into his scalp roughly and standing, unflinching, under the boiling spray that beat down on his skin. The red splotches on his neck were nearly consumed by the blossoms of blue that Jinki had left there. It was silent except for the sound of water pitter pattering onto the floor. A minute passed. Then another. Suddenly, though Taemin tensed. His body went rigid and his back stiffened enough for the muscles there to jump. He looked straight ahead, daring not to turn to face the intruder that he knew was there. He dropped the washcloth that he had been using to clean himself, fabric lying forgotten on the floor.
His eyes dragged up Taemin’s body when he caught the movement of Taemin’s neck quivering. He had mustered up the strength to face Jinki and he was about to turn his head. Consumed with panic, Jinki pounced on him before he could finish the movement, slamming his body into the cool tile. No one would hear Taemin’s whimpering over the constant stream of water. Jinki did though. Jinki soaked up the noises as they came, committing them to memory.
“W-Who are you?!” Taemin shouted, his words pouring from him like vomit. His body trembled violently.
Jinki nuzzled into Taemin’s neck, kissing the bruises there. “That’s not important, Sweetness.”
Taemin’s tears mingled with the tap water, but Jinki leaned forward to drink them in all the same, reaching up to stroke Taemin’s wet hair as gently as though he were handling glass. He tucked some of it behind the blonde’s ear and kissed at the dark roots. He was careful to be gentle. Aware that one wrong move could ruin everything.
“P-Please stop.” Taemin sobbed, adam’s apple bobbing in desperation.
Jinki shushed him, clicking his tongue. “Now, now, sweetness, none of that.” He carefully swallowed the anger that had burned in his belly at Taemin’s rejection.
Taemin let out a nearly animalistic shriek, body curving away from Jinki and slumping against the tile wall as though all of the strength had been sucked out of him. The sound startled Jinki and as a result, he slammed Taemin’s head into the tile. He was immediately remorseful for his brash actions, though, and he cooed nonsensical words of encouragement to him. Assured him that he was being such a good boy and that he should just relax and let Jinki take care of him. Most importantly, Jinki told Taemin that he loved him. Told him that he would always love him and that nothing would ever change that.
Taemin lost the will to fight and instead dug his nails into the wall in front of him, burying his face in his crossed arms, body wracked with sobs. Eventually, Taemin went frighteningly silent, his face still hidden. Jinki took it as a sign that he was starting to come around. That he was beginning to understand how much Jinki loved him.
“That’s a good boy…” Jinki murmured when Taemin’s back relaxed. He stroked Taemin’s hair, again. “Yes...such a good boy…” Jinki kissed at his hair once more.
He let Taemin sink to the floor, water washing away his tears. His head bowed and his shoulders shaking and Jinki imagined how overwhelmed he must have been by everything that Jinki had done for him.
“I want you to count for me, Sweetness,” Jinki murmured, petting Taemin’s soaked hair and stroking his face from his position above him. “Can you do that for me? Can you be a good boy for hyung?”
Taemin nodded shakily and sighed a giant breath. After a moment of hesitance, he began counting, eyes not daring to lift from the ground.
Jinki felt like his heart was going to burst from the effort of trying to contain all of his love.
He reached down to embrace Taemin once more...
Suddenly, Taemin began his fight anew. He was kicking and screaming and thrashing in Jinki’s hold and no matter how hard Jinki squeezed his neck, Taemin didn’t stop moving. Eventually, Taemin worked his mouth down to Jinki’s fingers and bit them hard enough to puncture the skin, freeing Jinki’s blood from his body. Jinki cursed and staggered back, slumping against the stall wall, cradling his hand to his chest.
Once Taemin was free, he ran from the room. He didn’t cut off the water. He didn’t gather his clothes. He didn’t look back. He was gone before Jinki could realize what had happened.
Jinki didn’t fight the rage and hurt that consumed him. He was done playing nice.
~~
Time passed quickly after that night. Even though Taemin had been avoiding public places, he still found ways to be close to the boy. It didn’t take long to figure out where his new haunts were and Jinki watched in concern as the bags under Taemin’s eyes increased in size as the days dragged on. His face was gaunt and his cheeks seemed to struggle to hold up the weight of his mouth, eyes much more large and round than Jinki recalled. The new Taemin was interesting to Jinki and he wanted to see more. He wanted to memorize all of Taemin’s expressions.
He still visited Taemin every so often. Once, he nabbed Taemin on the way to the library, dragging him up against a brick wall behind the chemistry building. Another time, Jinki cornered Taemin after his Old Testament lecture, tugging his hat low on his face and promising Taemin the world. Yet another time, Jinki followed closely behind Taemin on his way back after class and watched Taemin discover the gifts that Jinki had left for him in his room. Jinki was careful not to let Taemin repeat that night in the showers. Jinki was kind to the boy but his every move held a ghost of anger and a dark promise.
Taemin’s neck was dotted with bruises and bite marks. Luckily for him, the weather had cooled significantly and he could tug the collar of his white turtle neck snugly around the wounds, protecting them from sight. Jinki smiled at him from his spot behind a tree. He had noticed that his smiles had been coming to him much more easily these days.
Taemin, in contrast, was constantly plagued with deep frowns that seemed to swallow up his now-bony face. It seemed like the only time he showed any emotion other than sadness was when he was around Jinki. This just meant that Jinki had to make sure to spend even more time with him. Curiously enough, though, was the fact that Taemin hadn’t been alone a single moment in the past day. It seemed that no matter where he went, Taemin was closely shadowed by his roommate, Kai. His eyes were still skittish and they desperately scanned everywhere he went before he could feel at ease, but he sunk into safety much more quickly with his friend around.
Jinki knew what that meant. He could put two and two together when he saw Kai stretching out a comforting hand to Taemin, placing it on his shoulder and rubbing reassuringly. Taemin was cheating on him. Taemin was having an affair with his roommate.
Jinki’s palms nearly bled from the force of his nails scraping the skin. His jaw locked in anger and he didn’t bother fighting off the rage bubbling.
He burned the image of Kai hugging Taemin close to his chest into his memory and swore to do something about it. He started inching out from behind the tree, feet moving of their own free will. His movements were sloppy, and his vision was tunneled on the pair. He knew he was drawing attention to himself and he was risking being discovered, but he didn’t particularly care. He needed Taemin to know that his actions were unacceptable.
Eventually, the slow drag of Jinki’s feet against the dirt drew Taemin’s attention who had never really entirely let his guard down in the first place. His eyes shot up, brow furrowed. He zeroed in on Jinki and observed the rage that must have been so apparent on his face and absorbed the unspoken threat that was there. His eyes swell with tears and he pushed Kai away from him roughly, lips moving in unspoken pleads. He had realized who Jinki was. He understood that Jinki had been watching him even when he thought he was alone. He was begging for forgiveness, doing whatever he thought would spare him.
Jinki growled under his breath. He cared little about the fact that Taemin had seen his face and could very easily report him to someone now that he could pick Jinki out of a crowd. His fists were shaking from the force that was keeping them restrained. When Kai’s brow furrowed and he swept his gaze around the space, trying to locate what had Taemin so upset, Taemin lifted a hand to his cheek and urged it to look back at him, lips quivering into a smile. Even though Taemin was grinning, his eyes were screaming. Thankfully, Kai didn’t pick up on it. Taemin spared a side glance towards Jinki once more and observed the angry twist of his mouth.
Jinki jerked his head to the side, silently ordering Taemin to follow him. Taemin looked between Jinki and Kai and determined that it wasn’t smart to anger Jinki further. He extracted himself from Kai and urged him to go, reminding him that he had class. After Kai was gone, Taemin shuffled over to Jinki, head hanging and tears dripping down his cheek. Jinki said nothing and grabbed Taemin’s wrist, bruising the thin skin beneath his grasp. Taemin whimpered but Jinki did not care. Taemin needed to be punished.
He silently lead them to Taemin’s room. They came across one or two students who questioned the death grip that Jinki had on Taemin’s wrist and Taemin’s defeated expression but Jinki simply relaxed his mouth into a jester’s smile.
“Finals, ya know? Gets to the best of us! If I didn’t make him study, he never would!” Jinki chuckled, tugging at Taemin like a rag doll.
Taemin looked up for the first time since Jinki dragged him off, eyes silently begging for help. Jinki’s eyes narrowed for a split second before relaxing into something much more at ease. Jinki knew that in his khakis and sweater vest, he looked every bit the concerned tutor.
“Oh don’t try to ask them for help! You got yourself into this mess!” Jinki meant every word.
Taemin’s head fell again and the students laughed, patting him on the back. They wished him luck before leaving, probably heading to the library to claim a study room before anyone else. After he was sure they were gone, Jinki tugged him harshly into the building, leading him down the hall and ordering him to unlock his door.
Taemin pulled his keys out of his pocket with trembling fingers, but before he could work the metal into the lock, he dropped them. Jinki silently retrieved the keys and opened the door with ease, pushing Taemin in. He closed the door behind himself and slid the lock in place. He was intimate enough with Kai’s schedule to know that he wouldn’t return to the room until much later in the evening, if at all.
Taemin was a mess of tears and snot, pressing himself into the corner as much as he could manage. Jinki was having none of it. he grabbed Taemin by his hair and tossed him to the floor. The bed is high off the ground and he didn’t think Taemin deserved the comfort it would offer. He ignored the way Taemin’s head cracked against the floor, his body twisting to the side and cradling it, loud cries bubbling out of his throat.
Jinki lowered himself silently to his knees, lowering his face to Taemin’s ear.
“You belong to me.” He hissed. “Mine. You are mine. I am the only one you have in the whole world.” His voice was venomous and snakelike, eyes glowing with unsuppressed rage.
Taemin choked on his cries and spit, gagging as his body refused to listen to him. He was messy like that, face dripping in tears and mucus. His eyes were scared. He did not speak.
The sound of Jinki’s open palm smacking into Taemin’s cheek filled the quiet room and Taemin’s cries grew more incoherent, hand reaching up to touch at his reddened face as though he could push the pain back into the skin. Jinki was not having it.
“What did I say?!” Jinki bellowed.
Taemin wasted no time with his reply. “Y-You said...I-I’m yours…”
“Yes...You are mine…” Jinki nuzzled Taemin’s cheek with his nose, soothing the pain that he had inflicted. “And what does that mean, Precious?”
Taemin’s eyes squeezed shut. “I-I don’t know! I don’t fucking know! Let me go! Letmegoletmegoletmego!” He’s thrashing around but Jinki had a good grip on him.
The noise was scared out of him when Jinki calmly brought his hand down on the other side of Taemin’s face, knocking his head in the opposite direction.
“Wrong answer. Try again.”
“...”
“Answer me!” Jinki was quickly losing his grasp on what little patience he had left.
Taemin flinched away from him, refusing to meet his eyes. “It means I have to be a good boy…”
“Yes...correct. Have you been a good boy, Taeminnie? Have you been good for hyung?”
Taemin shook his head.
“And why is that? How have you misbehaved?”
Taemin was silent again and Jinki sighed in frustration. He struggled to be calm, telling himself that any healthy relationship was going to have its ups and downs. This down just happened to be a downward spiral.
“You are not to let others touch you, do you understand? You are mine! Only mine!” Jinki reached down and stroked Taemin’s cheek, scraping his nails against the skin there.
Taemin whimpered and Jinki admired the red lines on his face.
“You understand that I have to punish you, right?” Jinki sighed, running a hand through his hair.
Taemin’s breathing grew panicked. “No! Nononononono!” He cried.
Jinki sighed again and gently brushed Taemin’s hair away from his face. “This isn’t easy for me, but it’s the only way to make you understand. I’m doing this because I love you, Taemin.”
Jinki nodded to himself, convinced.
“Please...stop this...I promise I won’t tell anyone! I swear! I swear I swear!” Taemin began chanting out oaths. Promising that he would give Jinki his silence.
Jinki chuckled. “No can do, Sweetie. Don’t worry, though. You’ll learn eventually. I’m only doing this because I love you so much.”
Taemin’s arms and legs fell limply to the ground. He was resolved to endure.
Suddenly, Jinki’s phone started buzzing in his pant pocket. He sighed deeply and reached to fish it out.
“Ah, Kibum. What’s up?”
Kibum’s voice was as loud as ever when he answered. “Hey, oldtimer! Just checking that you’re still on for game night tonight, right?”
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” His voice was gentle and pleasant.
Kibum was overjoyed. “Great! Be at Jonghyun’s at seven. I think he wanted to play charades tonight.”
“See you there!”
With that said, Jinki hung up. In the blink of an eye, Jinki had his fingers wrapped around Taemin’s neck again, pushing him into the cold floor. Taemin reached up and tugged violently at his hair, teeth biting into his lips brutally as he attempted to restrain his screaming.
Jinki cooed at him and stroked his cheek, nudging his hands away from his hair and his teeth from his lip. “Don’t hurt yourself, love. It’s okay, I forgive you.”
Taemin was silent after that. He stayed silent until Jinki had left the room. Only then does Jinki pick up on the haunted sobbing echoing from Taemin’s door.
~~~~
Pairing: Onew/Taemin
Rating: R
Warnings: Violence/ Assault/ non-con/ domestic abuse/ violence
Final Word Count: 28136
The next morning, he woke to the sound of his phone ringing. It was Jonghyun and he wanted to get breakfast at Cafe E because his eight am was cancelled. Jinki agreed with an easy smile and dragged himself out of bed to get dressed. He was careful not to wake up Suho who was still sleeping. On the way out the door, he grabbed his phone and wallet and reached under his pillow to stroke the leather jacket resting there. He felt better about what had happened the night before after his epiphany in the shower.
He could tell already that it was going to be a good day.
When he reached the cafe, he saw that Jonghyun and Key were already there, wearing matching looks of regret. They were both sharing a pot of coffee and even though one of them was in fresh clothes, they both looked like they had been hit by eighteen wheelers.
Jinki seated himself warily. “I would ask what happened to you two last night, but I can’t talk to the dead.”
Kibum raised his hand palm out towards Jinki. “Zip it, old timer.”
Jonghyun lifted his head from where it had been resting against Kibum’s shoulder. “You look like you’re in a good mood today. How did your night go?”
Jinki’s expression went blank for a split second before he twisted his face into a mask of nonchalance. “It was alright. I went back to the dorm early and got more than eight hours of sleep for the first time in forever.”
Jonghyun nodded in understanding. “I’m jealous. I haven’t slept in days.” He laughed easily even though Jinki knew that it wasn’t an exaggeration.
Their waitress stopped by and asked if they were ready to order. Between the two of the them, Kibum and Jonghyun scraped up enough money for the three dollar endless pancake special. Jinki ordered two eggs, sunny side up. When their food arrived, Jinki made quick work of his food, stabbing viciously at the two yokes, letting them bleed all over the plate while Kibum and Jonghyun bickered about syrup.
Jinki could tell that it was going to be a good day.
~~~~
Jinki saw Taemin in the courtyard later on that day and was satisfied that Taemin hadn’t told anyone. His blonde hair was limper than normal and the collar of his shirt was pulled tightly around his throat, but other than that, Taemin could have won an oscar for his play at normalcy. He laughed along to jokes and fooled around like he usually did, convincing those around him that he was perfectly okay and that they had no cause to worry about him.
Jinki knew better, though. He knew because he and Taemin had a new closeness now that he didn’t have with other people. Because he and Taemin were so close and because Jinki knew Taemin so well, he could see the spots of fear bubbling on his face. It was in the way the corner of his lips are turned ever so slightly downward and in the way this shoulders are tensed, turned slightly away from his friends. Jinki frowned at the sadness pinching his features. Jinki wanted to see what other facial expressions he could make. He promised himself that he would put something happier there.
Jinki never intended to frighten him so much. He didn’t understand what had made him snap like he had the night before, but he swore that he would do something to fix it. He had only wanted to show Taemin how much he loved him and really, Taemin had seduced him. Taemin had been practically asking for it.
Still, the slight furrow of Taemin’s brow bothered Jinki, and he determined that he needed to do something to make Taemin stop looking so sad. He decided that surely, returning Taemin’s jacket to him would make him feel better.
Instead of eating dinner that night, Jinki slinked over to Taemin’s dorm. After spending so much time watching him, Jinki was very familiar with Taemin’s schedule and knew that he and his roommate would not be in their room for at least another hour. Their door was unlocked like always and Jinki slid into the room with little trouble, jacket in arm. Jinki did not waste time, slipping the jacket on the back of Taemin’s desk chair, giving it a final pat before exiting the room once more, stopping only to stroke Taemin’s pillow. With that done, Jinki headed to the library to work on his paper, texting Kibum along the way and asking if he was still on for game night.
~~~~~
One of the legs of Jonghyun’s kitchen table was slightly shorter than the others which made building a horse of cards incredibly difficult. Especially when Kibum kept knocking his leg against the table everytime he crossed them. Jinki thought he was doing it on purpose because he hated to see anyone do something better than he could.
Jonghyun returned from retrieving the pizza from the delivery person, slapping the greasy boxes down on the table and incidentally knocking over Jinki’s third attempt at a card tower.
Jinki sighed and decided not to waste the energy being mad.
Jonghyun didn’t hesitate to shove the pizza boxes open to reveal two steaming meat lovers pizzas, with extra meat. The sight of the ridiculous amounts of meat that they had made the pizzas look like a game of tetris gone wrong. Jinki’s stomach twisted a little bit and he politely declined when Jonghyun eagerly shoved some towards his face, urging him to eat.
Kibum wasn’t so polite, though, when Jonghyun offered him some. “Ew. Get that shit away from my face. I thought I told you cheese!” He scoffed and whipped out his phone immediately, furiously texting someone, cellphone charms swinging as violently as his eyebrow was twitching. He was probably ordering something else.
Jonghyun grinned at him, gums stuffed with ham and cheese. “My house my rules, Bum. Eat some, it’s good for you~” The last part is sung out to Kibum, waving the mess of sauce and dough in Kibum’s face for a second time.
Meanwhile, Jinki’s thoughts had drifted off to Taemin, thinking of how happy the boy would be to see his jacket. Jinki practically giggled at the thought, the noise bubbling in his throat and choking him.
Kibum raised a single scarred brow at Jinki, lips pierced in that way that told Jinki that he was being examined. “What’s gotten into you? You’re so...chipper today…”
His smile came easily to him in what felt like the first time in forever, mouth stretching the appropriate amount. “I’m just in a good mood.”
“That’s suspicious…”
Jonghyun interrupted Kibum’s interrogation, reaching around the table to wrap his arm around Jinki’s shoulder, mouth still full of pizza. “Ah leave him alone, Key. Let the boy be happy.” Jonghyun nodded to himself before he went back to eating.
Jinki carefully did not comment on the fact that he was older than Jonghyun and instead fixed his expression into a reassuring smile. “I’m just glad that the semester is almost over, am I right?”
That was apparently the correct thing to say because Kibum immediately launched into an involved description of his professor’s boils and how they were a threat to the safety of the school’s learning environment.
The rest of the night was passed listening to Kibum and Jonghyun argue about what constituted a safe learning environment followed by an impassioned speech delivered by Jonghyun about social justice.
It was a good night.
~~
On his way back to the dorm, Jinki took the route that would pass by Taemin’s window, hoping to catch a glimpse of the boy before heading to bed. Curiously enough, though, the window was drawn shut tightly. The curtains, though, were still left open so Jinki’s view wasn’t entirely blocked. Inside, Taemin was sleeping with the covers drawn over his head. Jinki thought it was odd because he had never done that before. He edged closer to the window, but before he could get too close, something caught his eye. If he followed the wall of Taemin’s building to the very front, he could see a trashcan sitting near the entrance to the dorm. Jinki must have passed it several times, but he has never noticed it before.
He noticed it that night though because there was something black and spiked sticking out of one side of the can, fluttering limply in the breeze. He inched towards it, eyes narrowing and brows drawing close together as he realized that it was the sleeve of the jacket that he had returned to Taemin just that day. His fingers twitched as they reached out, curving around the fabric and clenching it tightly in his fist.
He was angry all at once at the offense. The jacket had been a kind gesture of Jinki’s. He had hoped that returning the jacket to Taemin would have made him feel happy that Jinki cared enough about him to do so. Instead, it appeared that Taemin was ungrateful, thoughtlessly casting aside Jinki’s thoughtless actions like they meant nothing to him. His nails were biting into the fabric and his teeth were grinding painfully together, but Jinki did not care.
Like the flip of a switch, though, Jinki was calmed, once more, twisting his lips into a smile that still held a tinge of anger. Taemin was obviously upset. He wasn’t thinking clearly. Surely he would regret throwing away an article of clothing that would serve to remind him of their time together. He pulled it from the trashcan, dusting it off lightly before folding it over his arm. He would return it to Taemin the next chance he got, after giving him some time to calm down. He lifted the material to his nose and past the stench that it had acquired from its time spent in the trashcan, he could pick up the hint of tobacco and cinnamon and Taemin.
~~~
Jinki decided that he would attempt to return Taemin’s jacket, again, the next day after class. A clear view into Taemin’s room was prevented by the heavy blackout curtains that covered it and his door was locked for the first time since Jinki had been seeing him. Jinki was annoyed at first, nails biting into the skin of his hands, but then calmed himself and devised a plan. He glanced down the hall, scanning each door, until he located the one that must have belonged to the hall’s RA based on the decorative signs that covered it.
He knocked three times and made sure to smile sheepishly when the RA answered. The girl must have just woken up judging from the way that she sleepily rubbed at her eyes, t-shirt falling off of one shoulder. It was perfect, really, Jinki mused, because she would be too tired to really question him.
He laughed shyly. “Sorry for waking you up! I’m a friend of Taemin’s. He lives on this hall and he borrowed my math textbook. I really need it back before class.” He clasped his hands together, silently begging. “His door is locked right now and I really need that book! I have class in a few minutes!”
He could tell that she was slightly suspicious but after a moment or two of looking Jinki over and determining that a guy who wore bowties and loafers seriously couldn’t be that much of a threat, she nodded reluctantly and disappeared back into the room to retrieve her master key. Jinki made sure that he looked harmless, like he wouldn’t hurt a fly.
They made their way over to Taemin’s door and within two minutes, Jinki was inside and the RA had returned to her room with a warning not to hang around for too long. Jinki assured her that he wouldn’t be but a minute.
The first thing he did was fish Taemin’s leather jacket out of his backpack, folding it and placing it neatly at the foot of the bed. Next came a bag of chips that he had heard Taemin say he wanted to eat the other day, laying them on top of the jacket. Finally, Jinki retrieved a box of those little heart shaped candies that had cheesy statements printed on their surface. He giggled at the romance of it all.
Before he left, he dug one of Taemin’s shirts out of his laundry basket, lifting the fabric to his nose and breathing deeply, soaking in the stench of tobacco and cinnamon and the marijuana that Jinki had smelled on him before.
Once he was satisfied, he tossed the shirt back into the hamper and gulped in fresh air, Taemin’s scent still suffocating him. He adjusted himself in his pants and picked up the backpack that he must have laid down at some point, making sure the door would lock behind him before shutting it tightly, satisfied that Taemin would be pleased with the presents that he had left for him.
~~~
Jinki went three days without seeing Taemin and it nearly killed him. Taemin no longer spent time in the courtyard. He didn’t linger outside of classrooms. He didn’t study in the library. His window was blocked and the room to his door remained immovable. It was torturous to Jinki who had spent nearly everyday for the better part of the semester admiring Taemin’s beauty and growing closer and closer to the boy.
Jinki knew that it was an intentional avoidance. It made him angry to entertain the thought, but he knew that it was true. He was filled with rage at the idea that he had devoted so much of his time to worshipping Taemin only to be met with cool rejection.
But then he thought of the way Taemin’s eyes glittered in the sunlight and the way his lips curled into an easy smile and Jinki was calm, once again. He determined that he just needed to show Taemin how much he loved him. Obviously Taemin didn’t understand just how far Jinki was willing to go for him. When classes were done for the day, he waited near the entrance to Taemin’s building, just out of sight. He knew that Taemin had to leave at some point to go to the fitness center as a member of the swim team. He just had to wait for the right moment to approach him.
It didn’t take long. Taemin emerged right on time though he did look more skittish than usual. He was glancing around him, checking to make sure that no one was there, once he was satisfied that he was alone, he slowly made his way to the large gym looming in the distance. He was unaware that Jinki was following him several meters behind. He never suspected that Jinki would even have access to the fitness room at that hour.
Jinki decided to wait for him in the showers. He was less likely to be found there as the fitness center, itself, had a few security cameras set up to ensure that no one would hurt themselves during late night workouts. He had a hoodie drawn tightly around his face so that he wouldn’t be recognizable. Not that campus safety even looked at the video footage unless there was a complaint.
He decided to wait in the steam room until Taemin was done working out. He didn’t want Taemin to know that anyone else was in the showers with him. He didn’t want to give Taemin the chance to reject him.
It didn’t take long for Taemin to tiptoe into the room. Unlike before where Taemin had entered the room with confidence, head held high, now he was defeated and withdrawn, still living in the shadows of their previous encounter.
It pained Jinki to see him that way and he felt regret bubbling in his throat. He hadn’t meant to upset Taemin so much. It was just that he couldn’t control himself, and really, Taemin should have known better than to seduce people if he didn’t want to follow through with his silent promises.
Jinki would show him tonight. He would make Taemin understand.
The tiles were cool against Jinki’s feet as he carefully made his way to Taemin’s stall. He was careful that his bare toes didn’t slap against the floor and he steadied his breath which he hadn’t noticed had gone erratic. His heart was beating frantically but he imagined what his future with Taemin could be like and the thought gave him courage. He slid his hand in between the stall door and the wall, cautiously undoing the latch and slipping into the shower.
At first, Taemin was unaware of him, scrubbing soap into his scalp roughly and standing, unflinching, under the boiling spray that beat down on his skin. The red splotches on his neck were nearly consumed by the blossoms of blue that Jinki had left there. It was silent except for the sound of water pitter pattering onto the floor. A minute passed. Then another. Suddenly, though Taemin tensed. His body went rigid and his back stiffened enough for the muscles there to jump. He looked straight ahead, daring not to turn to face the intruder that he knew was there. He dropped the washcloth that he had been using to clean himself, fabric lying forgotten on the floor.
His eyes dragged up Taemin’s body when he caught the movement of Taemin’s neck quivering. He had mustered up the strength to face Jinki and he was about to turn his head. Consumed with panic, Jinki pounced on him before he could finish the movement, slamming his body into the cool tile. No one would hear Taemin’s whimpering over the constant stream of water. Jinki did though. Jinki soaked up the noises as they came, committing them to memory.
“W-Who are you?!” Taemin shouted, his words pouring from him like vomit. His body trembled violently.
Jinki nuzzled into Taemin’s neck, kissing the bruises there. “That’s not important, Sweetness.”
Taemin’s tears mingled with the tap water, but Jinki leaned forward to drink them in all the same, reaching up to stroke Taemin’s wet hair as gently as though he were handling glass. He tucked some of it behind the blonde’s ear and kissed at the dark roots. He was careful to be gentle. Aware that one wrong move could ruin everything.
“P-Please stop.” Taemin sobbed, adam’s apple bobbing in desperation.
Jinki shushed him, clicking his tongue. “Now, now, sweetness, none of that.” He carefully swallowed the anger that had burned in his belly at Taemin’s rejection.
Taemin let out a nearly animalistic shriek, body curving away from Jinki and slumping against the tile wall as though all of the strength had been sucked out of him. The sound startled Jinki and as a result, he slammed Taemin’s head into the tile. He was immediately remorseful for his brash actions, though, and he cooed nonsensical words of encouragement to him. Assured him that he was being such a good boy and that he should just relax and let Jinki take care of him. Most importantly, Jinki told Taemin that he loved him. Told him that he would always love him and that nothing would ever change that.
Taemin lost the will to fight and instead dug his nails into the wall in front of him, burying his face in his crossed arms, body wracked with sobs. Eventually, Taemin went frighteningly silent, his face still hidden. Jinki took it as a sign that he was starting to come around. That he was beginning to understand how much Jinki loved him.
“That’s a good boy…” Jinki murmured when Taemin’s back relaxed. He stroked Taemin’s hair, again. “Yes...such a good boy…” Jinki kissed at his hair once more.
He let Taemin sink to the floor, water washing away his tears. His head bowed and his shoulders shaking and Jinki imagined how overwhelmed he must have been by everything that Jinki had done for him.
“I want you to count for me, Sweetness,” Jinki murmured, petting Taemin’s soaked hair and stroking his face from his position above him. “Can you do that for me? Can you be a good boy for hyung?”
Taemin nodded shakily and sighed a giant breath. After a moment of hesitance, he began counting, eyes not daring to lift from the ground.
Jinki felt like his heart was going to burst from the effort of trying to contain all of his love.
He reached down to embrace Taemin once more...
Suddenly, Taemin began his fight anew. He was kicking and screaming and thrashing in Jinki’s hold and no matter how hard Jinki squeezed his neck, Taemin didn’t stop moving. Eventually, Taemin worked his mouth down to Jinki’s fingers and bit them hard enough to puncture the skin, freeing Jinki’s blood from his body. Jinki cursed and staggered back, slumping against the stall wall, cradling his hand to his chest.
Once Taemin was free, he ran from the room. He didn’t cut off the water. He didn’t gather his clothes. He didn’t look back. He was gone before Jinki could realize what had happened.
Jinki didn’t fight the rage and hurt that consumed him. He was done playing nice.
~~
Time passed quickly after that night. Even though Taemin had been avoiding public places, he still found ways to be close to the boy. It didn’t take long to figure out where his new haunts were and Jinki watched in concern as the bags under Taemin’s eyes increased in size as the days dragged on. His face was gaunt and his cheeks seemed to struggle to hold up the weight of his mouth, eyes much more large and round than Jinki recalled. The new Taemin was interesting to Jinki and he wanted to see more. He wanted to memorize all of Taemin’s expressions.
He still visited Taemin every so often. Once, he nabbed Taemin on the way to the library, dragging him up against a brick wall behind the chemistry building. Another time, Jinki cornered Taemin after his Old Testament lecture, tugging his hat low on his face and promising Taemin the world. Yet another time, Jinki followed closely behind Taemin on his way back after class and watched Taemin discover the gifts that Jinki had left for him in his room. Jinki was careful not to let Taemin repeat that night in the showers. Jinki was kind to the boy but his every move held a ghost of anger and a dark promise.
Taemin’s neck was dotted with bruises and bite marks. Luckily for him, the weather had cooled significantly and he could tug the collar of his white turtle neck snugly around the wounds, protecting them from sight. Jinki smiled at him from his spot behind a tree. He had noticed that his smiles had been coming to him much more easily these days.
Taemin, in contrast, was constantly plagued with deep frowns that seemed to swallow up his now-bony face. It seemed like the only time he showed any emotion other than sadness was when he was around Jinki. This just meant that Jinki had to make sure to spend even more time with him. Curiously enough, though, was the fact that Taemin hadn’t been alone a single moment in the past day. It seemed that no matter where he went, Taemin was closely shadowed by his roommate, Kai. His eyes were still skittish and they desperately scanned everywhere he went before he could feel at ease, but he sunk into safety much more quickly with his friend around.
Jinki knew what that meant. He could put two and two together when he saw Kai stretching out a comforting hand to Taemin, placing it on his shoulder and rubbing reassuringly. Taemin was cheating on him. Taemin was having an affair with his roommate.
Jinki’s palms nearly bled from the force of his nails scraping the skin. His jaw locked in anger and he didn’t bother fighting off the rage bubbling.
He burned the image of Kai hugging Taemin close to his chest into his memory and swore to do something about it. He started inching out from behind the tree, feet moving of their own free will. His movements were sloppy, and his vision was tunneled on the pair. He knew he was drawing attention to himself and he was risking being discovered, but he didn’t particularly care. He needed Taemin to know that his actions were unacceptable.
Eventually, the slow drag of Jinki’s feet against the dirt drew Taemin’s attention who had never really entirely let his guard down in the first place. His eyes shot up, brow furrowed. He zeroed in on Jinki and observed the rage that must have been so apparent on his face and absorbed the unspoken threat that was there. His eyes swell with tears and he pushed Kai away from him roughly, lips moving in unspoken pleads. He had realized who Jinki was. He understood that Jinki had been watching him even when he thought he was alone. He was begging for forgiveness, doing whatever he thought would spare him.
Jinki growled under his breath. He cared little about the fact that Taemin had seen his face and could very easily report him to someone now that he could pick Jinki out of a crowd. His fists were shaking from the force that was keeping them restrained. When Kai’s brow furrowed and he swept his gaze around the space, trying to locate what had Taemin so upset, Taemin lifted a hand to his cheek and urged it to look back at him, lips quivering into a smile. Even though Taemin was grinning, his eyes were screaming. Thankfully, Kai didn’t pick up on it. Taemin spared a side glance towards Jinki once more and observed the angry twist of his mouth.
Jinki jerked his head to the side, silently ordering Taemin to follow him. Taemin looked between Jinki and Kai and determined that it wasn’t smart to anger Jinki further. He extracted himself from Kai and urged him to go, reminding him that he had class. After Kai was gone, Taemin shuffled over to Jinki, head hanging and tears dripping down his cheek. Jinki said nothing and grabbed Taemin’s wrist, bruising the thin skin beneath his grasp. Taemin whimpered but Jinki did not care. Taemin needed to be punished.
He silently lead them to Taemin’s room. They came across one or two students who questioned the death grip that Jinki had on Taemin’s wrist and Taemin’s defeated expression but Jinki simply relaxed his mouth into a jester’s smile.
“Finals, ya know? Gets to the best of us! If I didn’t make him study, he never would!” Jinki chuckled, tugging at Taemin like a rag doll.
Taemin looked up for the first time since Jinki dragged him off, eyes silently begging for help. Jinki’s eyes narrowed for a split second before relaxing into something much more at ease. Jinki knew that in his khakis and sweater vest, he looked every bit the concerned tutor.
“Oh don’t try to ask them for help! You got yourself into this mess!” Jinki meant every word.
Taemin’s head fell again and the students laughed, patting him on the back. They wished him luck before leaving, probably heading to the library to claim a study room before anyone else. After he was sure they were gone, Jinki tugged him harshly into the building, leading him down the hall and ordering him to unlock his door.
Taemin pulled his keys out of his pocket with trembling fingers, but before he could work the metal into the lock, he dropped them. Jinki silently retrieved the keys and opened the door with ease, pushing Taemin in. He closed the door behind himself and slid the lock in place. He was intimate enough with Kai’s schedule to know that he wouldn’t return to the room until much later in the evening, if at all.
Taemin was a mess of tears and snot, pressing himself into the corner as much as he could manage. Jinki was having none of it. he grabbed Taemin by his hair and tossed him to the floor. The bed is high off the ground and he didn’t think Taemin deserved the comfort it would offer. He ignored the way Taemin’s head cracked against the floor, his body twisting to the side and cradling it, loud cries bubbling out of his throat.
Jinki lowered himself silently to his knees, lowering his face to Taemin’s ear.
“You belong to me.” He hissed. “Mine. You are mine. I am the only one you have in the whole world.” His voice was venomous and snakelike, eyes glowing with unsuppressed rage.
Taemin choked on his cries and spit, gagging as his body refused to listen to him. He was messy like that, face dripping in tears and mucus. His eyes were scared. He did not speak.
The sound of Jinki’s open palm smacking into Taemin’s cheek filled the quiet room and Taemin’s cries grew more incoherent, hand reaching up to touch at his reddened face as though he could push the pain back into the skin. Jinki was not having it.
“What did I say?!” Jinki bellowed.
Taemin wasted no time with his reply. “Y-You said...I-I’m yours…”
“Yes...You are mine…” Jinki nuzzled Taemin’s cheek with his nose, soothing the pain that he had inflicted. “And what does that mean, Precious?”
Taemin’s eyes squeezed shut. “I-I don’t know! I don’t fucking know! Let me go! Letmegoletmegoletmego!” He’s thrashing around but Jinki had a good grip on him.
The noise was scared out of him when Jinki calmly brought his hand down on the other side of Taemin’s face, knocking his head in the opposite direction.
“Wrong answer. Try again.”
“...”
“Answer me!” Jinki was quickly losing his grasp on what little patience he had left.
Taemin flinched away from him, refusing to meet his eyes. “It means I have to be a good boy…”
“Yes...correct. Have you been a good boy, Taeminnie? Have you been good for hyung?”
Taemin shook his head.
“And why is that? How have you misbehaved?”
Taemin was silent again and Jinki sighed in frustration. He struggled to be calm, telling himself that any healthy relationship was going to have its ups and downs. This down just happened to be a downward spiral.
“You are not to let others touch you, do you understand? You are mine! Only mine!” Jinki reached down and stroked Taemin’s cheek, scraping his nails against the skin there.
Taemin whimpered and Jinki admired the red lines on his face.
“You understand that I have to punish you, right?” Jinki sighed, running a hand through his hair.
Taemin’s breathing grew panicked. “No! Nononononono!” He cried.
Jinki sighed again and gently brushed Taemin’s hair away from his face. “This isn’t easy for me, but it’s the only way to make you understand. I’m doing this because I love you, Taemin.”
Jinki nodded to himself, convinced.
“Please...stop this...I promise I won’t tell anyone! I swear! I swear I swear!” Taemin began chanting out oaths. Promising that he would give Jinki his silence.
Jinki chuckled. “No can do, Sweetie. Don’t worry, though. You’ll learn eventually. I’m only doing this because I love you so much.”
Taemin’s arms and legs fell limply to the ground. He was resolved to endure.
Suddenly, Jinki’s phone started buzzing in his pant pocket. He sighed deeply and reached to fish it out.
“Ah, Kibum. What’s up?”
Kibum’s voice was as loud as ever when he answered. “Hey, oldtimer! Just checking that you’re still on for game night tonight, right?”
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” His voice was gentle and pleasant.
Kibum was overjoyed. “Great! Be at Jonghyun’s at seven. I think he wanted to play charades tonight.”
“See you there!”
With that said, Jinki hung up. In the blink of an eye, Jinki had his fingers wrapped around Taemin’s neck again, pushing him into the cold floor. Taemin reached up and tugged violently at his hair, teeth biting into his lips brutally as he attempted to restrain his screaming.
Jinki cooed at him and stroked his cheek, nudging his hands away from his hair and his teeth from his lip. “Don’t hurt yourself, love. It’s okay, I forgive you.”
Taemin was silent after that. He stayed silent until Jinki had left the room. Only then does Jinki pick up on the haunted sobbing echoing from Taemin’s door.
~~~~