illogical

[spacepearls]

I love you. I love your mind. I love your curiosity. I love the simplicity of your thought process. I love that you care about animals. I love the way it feels when we lay so close, I can feel your heart. I love that you love adventures. I love your logic. I love your passion. I think that's what I love most about you.

But you don't love me. I can'

Comments

[cheaface]

where the hell have you been!! i miss you lover!
and this makes me sad, i hope everything is okay :(

[spacepearls]

Where have I been? Where have you been? I was really worried there for a while. I'm glad that you're moving on from the stuff in your past.

And I just ended the 6 year relationship I was in about a week ago. I don't really know how to handle myself.

I've been trying to paint lately, and I was wondering what your favorite picture is of yourself. I'd love to use you as my muse.

[cheaface]

yeah, dunno if you've read my journal lately,
but i was MIA cause i was in a hosp.and mental institution for a bit..eghh. bad experience. anyways...

what happened? why did you feel you needed to end it?
i went through similar experiences when i ended a 4 year relationship a while back, and again a 1 1/2 year one more recently, but i'm definitely healedup, so if you need anyone to talk to that understands, you know wehre to find me love.

my favorite picture of myself is probably the one i took about 4 entries back on my journal. maybe 3? i don't remember, but wow that makes me feel amazing, will you show it to me if you do? i have lots on my myspace (http://myspace.com/cheaaa) too i dunno what kind of things you like to paint, but that's exciting, you've got to show me! painting can be so theraputic and calming <3,
i need to buy some canvas' so i can do the same.
i hope you wouldn't mind if i may use your icon as a muse as well. i adore it as you know.

[spacepearls]

Are you okay? Really. If you need to vent or anything, I'm here. I've never been in an institution, even though I've felt I've needed to before, so I don't know exactly how you feel, but I'm here if you need someone to just listen.

Thank you for being there if I need to talk to someone. I can't really explain how I'm feeling right now. I don't think enough time has gone by for me to really know what to think. I felt like I had to end because we've been going through the same cycles for like the past 3 or 4 years. Just heart ache and then taking each other back and it never got anywhere.

And of course you can see it. You can even have it if you want after I scan it and everything. When I stop painting/drawing for a long time and I come back to doing a piece, I feel so refreshed and everything seems a bit brighter. Oh, and is the picture of you sitting down in a white tank?

[mis_fracture_x]

oh god.. honey Im so so so sorry I know how hard that type of thing is I was in a relationship for three years so not as long as yours but it hurt so bad when I couldnt be with him anymore Im still not okay I feel like Im nothing without him ..but things will get better it just takes time

[spacepearls]

I know. Time is what I need from him. But it seems impossible to become my own person when he was the main thing in my life for so long. I feel incomplete and not ready to discover who I really am.

[pocketofskies]

*hug*

[somuchcolor]

Who are you.

[spacepearls]

I am me. Who are you?

[somuchcolor]

I'm never sure. I hope to be the light passing through a prism.
I just wanted to tell you
to never lose hope
and that whatever you throw out there into the world, sometimes seeming an abyss, I know,
it will come back to you in time.
It's all energy.
I am sorry for your loss,
but in a strange sort of way it made me smile.
You're ready to fly.

[spacepearls]

Thank you so much.

This really touched my heart.