Baggathadouche
So pretty much everyone who would care was there, but I shall recount it anyway: Last weekend Bethany, Shasta, and I visited Alice in San Francisco.
Friday night I drove down to Woodland after working. I made okay time, but had a few delays, including a semi that had turned over.
Once in Woodland, Bethany drove Shasta and I to San Francisco in more traffic than we'd anticipated. We also decided to pay the toll almost entirely with quarters. Because we're bags of douche.
Once at Alice's, we decided drinking was in order, and walked to the corner liquor store for chasers. It was such a weird little store, as it was full of random stuff, including but not limited to, individual-sized bags of Almond Roca (I've never seen such a non-generic candy in a corner store before), Virgin Mary prayer candles, and religious stickers. Shasta still had quarters left, so we bought a Virgin Mary sticker from a vending machine. She sparkles with holograms. We found this absolutely hilarious. We also found this random window sign, which sounded dirty as hell. In the following pic, Bethany is holding Mary and pulling up her pant leg, both of which are difficult to see, but make it even better.
Shasta and Alice proceeded to get drunk, and Alice gave me three pairs of shoes and a tank top, and a shirt and pants to Shasta. I don't think Bethany got anything but a purse. Poor Bethany.
Eventually, after much catching up, we went to bed at about 4:30 a.m. I woke up at 9:30, which made me royally hate life, but after calling my mom and Brian because I'd forgotten the night before, I went back to bed and luckily managed to sleep. I was still the first one up at noon though, and it took everyone else until about 2:30 before we were all dressed and ready to go.
Alice drove us around some of the residential areas to look at cool houses and whatnot, then we went to a place called Pizza Orgasmica, which truly lived up to its name. Oh, except they had a plumbing problem and the whole place smelled of piss so we had to move three times until we'd escaped it. Anyhoo, we had the "Serpent's Kiss" pizza, though the "Lindsay Lohan" and "Paris Go to Jail" were tempting. But we probably would've gotten Herpes just by ordering a pizza named after those two, so it's good that we didn't get them.
There was then more driving around, and eventually we made our way to Haight Street. It was cool, but I was wearing heels (because I was told we wouldn't be walking much) and had to walk down a hill, so my feet were kind of dying. Alice was going to buy me shoes, but I couldn't with good conscience let her spend $20 on ugly flip-flops, and the rest were hideously expensive. We hit some awesome stores, but what with being poor as hell, I only ended up spending ten bucks on hair dye at the drag queen store. I'm pretty proud of myself for that, yet still wish I'd had more spendin' cash.
We stopped off at Safeway and got boozy goodness, then back to Alice's briefly, then we went to a Kebab place for dinner. Damn was that good kebab. I now wish I'd been more adventurous and not just had chicken (which was still excellent), but I hadn't known what to expect.
Once back at Alice's, Kostya hid in the bedroom (actually I found it a little offensive how he totally avoided us all weekend, but oh well), while we girls drank and watched Talladega Nights. We had to drink every time they said "shake and bake," which with the appletinis made of apple liqueur and 100 proof Smirnoff, meant I was fucked up right quick. But for some reason I thought it was wearing off, so I drank MORE. Damn was I Drunky McDrunkerson. For a while there, I thought I was going to vom. But I had a little nap and then woke up feeling refreshed. Too bad it was like 3:00 a.m. at that point, and Alice went to bed.
Bethany, Shasta and I stayed up being dorks and I decided we had to take tons of pictures. But of course, I suck at the whole self-photography thing and kept getting shots of Bethany's boobs. I seriously have like 10 pictures of her torso, not counting the ones that I was sober enough to delete at the time. In my defense, Bethany was sober and really was no better.
At one point we decided to form an emo band and call ourselves Douche: The Band. Or "Baggathadouche" (bag-of-the-douche). I think if we were Douche: The Band, then "Baggathadouche" was our album title, and if we were Baggathadouche, then we'd have Douche: The Album. Really we had no plans to form an actual band, we just wanted to take pictures being emo and say "douche" a lot. Because I've made it everyone's favorite word. Other highlights of drunkenness include Shasta's looking through Alice's Human Sexuality book and me subsequently convincing Bethany and Shasta it would be awesome if they did one of the sex poses.
Eventually it got to be 5:00 a.m. so we went to bed. I woke up at 9:30 AGAIN and yearned for it to be later. At that point, I'd woken up so many times from Bethany's snoring that I'd thought it had to be at least 1:00 pm. But no. NO. Luckily I went back to sleep, and again was the first one up at noon. We managed to get out of there by just after 2:00, but not before taking many a failed picture of all four of us together. C'est la vie.
Bethany drove us back to Woodland in doomy traffic of doom, and we got semi-gross (but cheap) Chinese food at the Woodland mall. Then I was on my way. Yay for four hour drives all by myself. Oh, and my doohicky died so I had to listen to the RADIO all the way. Plus I went to drop my mom's car off at her house and she wasn't there. So what should have only taken three and a half hours took much longer. Not that I'm bitter.
Anyway, it was really awesome seeing Alice again. She may be skinny and married now, but she's the same Alice and I love her for it.
Friday night I drove down to Woodland after working. I made okay time, but had a few delays, including a semi that had turned over.
Once in Woodland, Bethany drove Shasta and I to San Francisco in more traffic than we'd anticipated. We also decided to pay the toll almost entirely with quarters. Because we're bags of douche.
Once at Alice's, we decided drinking was in order, and walked to the corner liquor store for chasers. It was such a weird little store, as it was full of random stuff, including but not limited to, individual-sized bags of Almond Roca (I've never seen such a non-generic candy in a corner store before), Virgin Mary prayer candles, and religious stickers. Shasta still had quarters left, so we bought a Virgin Mary sticker from a vending machine. She sparkles with holograms. We found this absolutely hilarious. We also found this random window sign, which sounded dirty as hell. In the following pic, Bethany is holding Mary and pulling up her pant leg, both of which are difficult to see, but make it even better.
Shasta and Alice proceeded to get drunk, and Alice gave me three pairs of shoes and a tank top, and a shirt and pants to Shasta. I don't think Bethany got anything but a purse. Poor Bethany.
Eventually, after much catching up, we went to bed at about 4:30 a.m. I woke up at 9:30, which made me royally hate life, but after calling my mom and Brian because I'd forgotten the night before, I went back to bed and luckily managed to sleep. I was still the first one up at noon though, and it took everyone else until about 2:30 before we were all dressed and ready to go.
Alice drove us around some of the residential areas to look at cool houses and whatnot, then we went to a place called Pizza Orgasmica, which truly lived up to its name. Oh, except they had a plumbing problem and the whole place smelled of piss so we had to move three times until we'd escaped it. Anyhoo, we had the "Serpent's Kiss" pizza, though the "Lindsay Lohan" and "Paris Go to Jail" were tempting. But we probably would've gotten Herpes just by ordering a pizza named after those two, so it's good that we didn't get them.
There was then more driving around, and eventually we made our way to Haight Street. It was cool, but I was wearing heels (because I was told we wouldn't be walking much) and had to walk down a hill, so my feet were kind of dying. Alice was going to buy me shoes, but I couldn't with good conscience let her spend $20 on ugly flip-flops, and the rest were hideously expensive. We hit some awesome stores, but what with being poor as hell, I only ended up spending ten bucks on hair dye at the drag queen store. I'm pretty proud of myself for that, yet still wish I'd had more spendin' cash.
We stopped off at Safeway and got boozy goodness, then back to Alice's briefly, then we went to a Kebab place for dinner. Damn was that good kebab. I now wish I'd been more adventurous and not just had chicken (which was still excellent), but I hadn't known what to expect.
Once back at Alice's, Kostya hid in the bedroom (actually I found it a little offensive how he totally avoided us all weekend, but oh well), while we girls drank and watched Talladega Nights. We had to drink every time they said "shake and bake," which with the appletinis made of apple liqueur and 100 proof Smirnoff, meant I was fucked up right quick. But for some reason I thought it was wearing off, so I drank MORE. Damn was I Drunky McDrunkerson. For a while there, I thought I was going to vom. But I had a little nap and then woke up feeling refreshed. Too bad it was like 3:00 a.m. at that point, and Alice went to bed.
Bethany, Shasta and I stayed up being dorks and I decided we had to take tons of pictures. But of course, I suck at the whole self-photography thing and kept getting shots of Bethany's boobs. I seriously have like 10 pictures of her torso, not counting the ones that I was sober enough to delete at the time. In my defense, Bethany was sober and really was no better.
At one point we decided to form an emo band and call ourselves Douche: The Band. Or "Baggathadouche" (bag-of-the-douche). I think if we were Douche: The Band, then "Baggathadouche" was our album title, and if we were Baggathadouche, then we'd have Douche: The Album. Really we had no plans to form an actual band, we just wanted to take pictures being emo and say "douche" a lot. Because I've made it everyone's favorite word. Other highlights of drunkenness include Shasta's looking through Alice's Human Sexuality book and me subsequently convincing Bethany and Shasta it would be awesome if they did one of the sex poses.
Eventually it got to be 5:00 a.m. so we went to bed. I woke up at 9:30 AGAIN and yearned for it to be later. At that point, I'd woken up so many times from Bethany's snoring that I'd thought it had to be at least 1:00 pm. But no. NO. Luckily I went back to sleep, and again was the first one up at noon. We managed to get out of there by just after 2:00, but not before taking many a failed picture of all four of us together. C'est la vie.
Bethany drove us back to Woodland in doomy traffic of doom, and we got semi-gross (but cheap) Chinese food at the Woodland mall. Then I was on my way. Yay for four hour drives all by myself. Oh, and my doohicky died so I had to listen to the RADIO all the way. Plus I went to drop my mom's car off at her house and she wasn't there. So what should have only taken three and a half hours took much longer. Not that I'm bitter.
Anyway, it was really awesome seeing Alice again. She may be skinny and married now, but she's the same Alice and I love her for it.