Ficlet:: Bugger
Title: Bugger
Pairing: Jack/James
Rated: PG-13
Genre: Humor
Word count: 470
Beta: porridgebird
***
“So this is where your heart truly lies then?” James heard the pirate whisper, as he looked after the Black Pearl disappearing on the horizon, once again with its other captain at the helm. Sparrow was clutching the railing of the Flying Dutchman and there was such an expression of sadness and longing in his eyes, one could almost take pity on him. Almost.
“I’m so sorry, Sparrow. I was very much rooting for you,” James said, smiling falsely as he stepped beside the man.
Angry dark rimmed eyes turned towards him and narrowed. “Never thought I would say this, mate, but I think I liked you better when you still had a stick up your arse,” Sparrow said, poking him sceptically as if to test his solidness, “and were alive, for that matter,” he added.
“Well, that second part is rather irrelevant on this ship,” stated James, pushing at Sparrow and trapping him subtly between himself and the railing, “as for the other thing…” he pushed some more, getting right into Sparrow’s face, “I would think we could come up with an easy enough remedy for that.”
Sparrow was leaning dangerously far back over the railing at this point. The shocked expression on his face was just priceless. “Are ye…” he stammered, brought off balance in more than one way, ”are you proposing what I think you’re proposing?”
“So it would seem,” James leered at the pirate, emphatically pressing his erection between the other man’s legs.
Sparrow squeaked.
“Is there a problem?” Will Turner, the very picture of a concerned captain, stepped out in front of his crewmen, some of which had assembled at the scene by now. “He…” Sparrow sputtered, pointing at James, “he…” he tried again but couldn’t quite manage to get the words out and finally resorted to obscene gesturing.
“Ah,” Turner nodded, pleased, “no problem then.” As this was met with nothing but disbelief and an open mouth from Sparrow, Turner frowned. “Jack?” he asked, leaning in to his old friend, looking even more concerned than before. “You haven’t become a eunuch, have you?” he whispered enquiringly, glancing at where Sparrow’s and James’s hips were practically joined already. It wasn’t in a hushed enough tone to not be still clearly audible.
“Ha!” Sparrow bellowed after glancing from Will to James to the on-looking crew and back. Shoving James off he sashayed away; to somewhere below decks presumably.
“Oh, this will be most difficult.” James shook his head in amusement, as he followed the man’s backside with his eyes. “Wish me luck,” he asked, looking at his equally amused captain, before following after Sparrow.
“Good luck!” he heard Turner comply behind him and then admonishing his crew. “What are you scoundrels gawking at, don’t you have any work to do? On your posts!”
***
Pairing: Jack/James
Rated: PG-13
Genre: Humor
Word count: 470
Beta: porridgebird
***
“So this is where your heart truly lies then?” James heard the pirate whisper, as he looked after the Black Pearl disappearing on the horizon, once again with its other captain at the helm. Sparrow was clutching the railing of the Flying Dutchman and there was such an expression of sadness and longing in his eyes, one could almost take pity on him. Almost.
“I’m so sorry, Sparrow. I was very much rooting for you,” James said, smiling falsely as he stepped beside the man.
Angry dark rimmed eyes turned towards him and narrowed. “Never thought I would say this, mate, but I think I liked you better when you still had a stick up your arse,” Sparrow said, poking him sceptically as if to test his solidness, “and were alive, for that matter,” he added.
“Well, that second part is rather irrelevant on this ship,” stated James, pushing at Sparrow and trapping him subtly between himself and the railing, “as for the other thing…” he pushed some more, getting right into Sparrow’s face, “I would think we could come up with an easy enough remedy for that.”
Sparrow was leaning dangerously far back over the railing at this point. The shocked expression on his face was just priceless. “Are ye…” he stammered, brought off balance in more than one way, ”are you proposing what I think you’re proposing?”
“So it would seem,” James leered at the pirate, emphatically pressing his erection between the other man’s legs.
Sparrow squeaked.
“Is there a problem?” Will Turner, the very picture of a concerned captain, stepped out in front of his crewmen, some of which had assembled at the scene by now. “He…” Sparrow sputtered, pointing at James, “he…” he tried again but couldn’t quite manage to get the words out and finally resorted to obscene gesturing.
“Ah,” Turner nodded, pleased, “no problem then.” As this was met with nothing but disbelief and an open mouth from Sparrow, Turner frowned. “Jack?” he asked, leaning in to his old friend, looking even more concerned than before. “You haven’t become a eunuch, have you?” he whispered enquiringly, glancing at where Sparrow’s and James’s hips were practically joined already. It wasn’t in a hushed enough tone to not be still clearly audible.
“Ha!” Sparrow bellowed after glancing from Will to James to the on-looking crew and back. Shoving James off he sashayed away; to somewhere below decks presumably.
“Oh, this will be most difficult.” James shook his head in amusement, as he followed the man’s backside with his eyes. “Wish me luck,” he asked, looking at his equally amused captain, before following after Sparrow.
“Good luck!” he heard Turner comply behind him and then admonishing his crew. “What are you scoundrels gawking at, don’t you have any work to do? On your posts!”
***