(Untitled)

May 11, 2008 12:09

Leave a comment

Comments 1

kryzzz May 12 2008, 19:58:47 UTC
I like this story overall. Possibly one of my top 3.

I don't like the beginning. I feel you concentrate too heavily on the description of the place. I see how having everything dictated exactly makes sure the reader sees what you envision, but part of writing is letting readers see it through their own eyes.

Reply


Leave a comment

Up