RenIchi - It's Pure Instinct
Title: It's Pure Instinct.
Pairing: Renji/Ichigo (Ichigo POV).
Rating: PG, maybe PG-13 for the F word.
Genre: Fluff, some crack for good measures.
Word Count: 1,410.
Summary: Rukia arranged a birthday treat for Ichigo when tragedy struck.
A/N: This is my late (15 days late. I find that symbolic. And lame, but, you know, my muse is a sadist) birthday present for Ichigo.
Comments are love!
Ichigo's eyes hurt. He tried to focus on that sole fact and ignore those other pesky thoughts like "why the hell am I here instead of sleeping in on my birthday?" or "when is this nightmare going to end?" or "how the hell did Rukia manage to drag me here?"
He hated that girl more than anything at the moment. Even more than his poor traumatized eyes.
"It'll be fun, Ichigo! When was the last time you went to the movies?"
A long time ago, actually, and he'd be damned to go again after… this. She gave him her best puppy-dog eyes (and when that hadn't worked she kicked him hard) and somehow got him to the movie theater. To a fricking chick flick, to be precise.
His brain stopped functioning after the first half hour, and now he was massaging his temples relentlessly. Rukia seemed to thoroughly enjoy herself, and burst out laughing every now and then, ignoring Ichigo's glaring and cursing.
She gave him a dirty look after an especially loud snort. "You know, I thought we should do something special for your birthday, and you don’t -"
"You kicked me!"
"Because you wouldn't cooperate!"
"You can't kick people on their birthdays!"
"I tried to be nice and you were being a pain in the ass!"
"So you kicked me?!"
"I had every right. Now shut up, I'm trying to watch a movie."
Ichigo was about to snarl a reply when his cell phone rang. It was the most beautiful sound he'd ever heard (the people at the theater disagreed loudly, but he couldn't care less).
"Hello?"
"Oi, Ichigo."
Ichigo blinked in surprise and delight. "Renji?"
"Yeah, listen - oh, no you don't - is Rukia there?"
"Are you okay?"
"Well - son of a… - I've been better. Just put her on the damn phone."
Ichigo passed the cell phone over to Rukia, disappointed and slightly worried. He expected at least getting lucky on his own damn birthday, but he hadn't even seen Renji before Rukia kidnapped him.
"Can't you take care of it on your own?" Rukia asked, sounding amazed. Ichigo heard some shouting over the phone.
"Fine, fine. We'll head out soon." She hung up and gave the phone back to Ichigo, smiling.
"What's up? Is it a hollow?" He left out the "can we go now, please?" part, out of courtesy.
"Renji will be just fine."
"Well, what happened?" He asked, still not giving up on the notion of going home. Oh, and saving Renji and all that.
"Nothing he can't handle. Eventually. Now shut up."
He considered leaving at once, but the glint in Rukia's eyes told him loud and clear that if he got up he will receive a well-aimed kick that'll leave him castrated. He hated birthdays.
And anyway, if it was something serious, Rukia's spirit phone would have rung (a fact that made Ichigo even more curious as to what the hell Renji was doing). So now he had to wait out the movie. Stupid birthday.
*
When he finally got to his apartment, leaving Rukia as soon as the movie ended, he stared at the living room, dumbstruck, and his heart started racing.
There was debris everywhere, and smoke stung his eyes. Some furniture were actually still on fire. Ichigo quickly put out the flames and started scouting the place.
"Renji! Where the hell are you?" he shouted, and heard a grunt from near by. There wasn't a whole lot of far by, considering the tiny place he could afford, so it wasn't hard to locate the missing shinigami.
Ichigo entered the kitchen quickly, hurrying towards the far corner.
Renji was lying on the floor, sweaty and exhausted-looking, his robes torn apart. Ichigo could have sworn there were several injuries. The most alarming fact was that his sword was drawn. Ichigo dropped to his knees next to him and tugged his shoulders, pulling his body up.
"Was it a hollow? When were you attacked? Are you alright?"
Renji slowly opened his eyes and grunted again. "I'm never…"
Ichigo hated how hoarse his voice sounded. Obviously the smoke had some effect on him. "What is it?"
"I'm never… baking a cake… again," Renji said softly.
Ichigo blinked, and then stood up at once, causing Renji to flatten on the floor again, his head banging loudly.
Ichigo looked around and found the apparent source of the fire, other than the idiot on the floor. A (former) rusty old oven. It was a disaster waiting to happen, but Ichigo never, ever tought the said disaster would consist of a shinigami, a lieutenant in the Gotei fricking 13, that would attack an oven. And lose.
"Are you fucking insane?!" He turned to Renji again.
"It was that goddamn knobby thingy!"
"Oh, right, the oven started it. I can't believe I just said that. What were you thinking?!"
Renji huffed and straightened his robes, but didn't get off the floor. Ichigo wondered if he was just lazy or maybe the fire he started caused some actual damage.
"It wouldn't obey."
"And you figured sparring with it would help?!"
"I didn't know what else to do!" He yelled dramatically, and sheathed his sword safely. Ichigo rolled his eyes, but wouldn't cave under the pressure of Renji's desperate voice (…and semi-nakedness. And that odd scent of… fruit?).
"Did you try reasoning with it? Making it understand?"
This had to have been the most ridiculous discussion he's ever had. And dating Abarai Renji for the past month meant the bar was set pretty high. At least by now Renji knew when he was being mocked.
"Shut up, you know I don't get along with these electric things."
"There is a difference between disliking and attacking."
Renji growled and suddenly sent his leg to the left, kicking at Ichigo's ankles and causing him to fall flat on his back with a yelp. Renji immediately seized the opportunity and climbed on top of him, sitting in his lap and pinning his wrists to the floor.
"I dislike you, therefore I attack you. It's pure instinct, Ichigo."
The change was sudden, but not altogether displeasing. Ichigo adjusted himself, breathing harder than he should have.
"That was a surprise attack, it's dirty, and it doesn't count. You didn't win."
"I totally did."
Ichigo sighed again. "Fine, O Great Oven Destroyer. You pinned me. What do you want?"
Renji smiled playfully, and Ichigo wasn't certain he liked where this was going. Or maybe he did.
"Well, you could avenge my defeat."
Ichigo cast a sideways glance at the former oven. "I think you got that covered."
"Really?"
"Renji, it didn't really stand a chance against an angry shinigami with a released zanpakotu."
"And…?"
"And you rule."
"Oh, I so do." Renji grinned in victory and Ichigo chuckled.
"What the hell were you trying to cook, anyway?"
"Well, you know. It's your birthday and all."
Ichigo smiled in surprise. "You tried to make me a birthday cake?"
Renji stiffened instantly and folded his arms across his chest. "Well, yeah. So what?"
Ichigo positioned his now free hands over Renji's thighs, still lodged firmly on either side of him. "Nothin'. S'nice."
Renji now seemed actually embarrassed. "I did try. Didn't anyone get you a cake? You really should get yourself a better set of friends."
"Yeah, ones that don't kick me."
"Kick… Rukia kicked you?"
"Yeah! Right in the shins! How'd you… Wait, was Rukia in on this?"
Renji tilted his head innocently. "What do you mean?"
"Was she supposed to, like, distract me while you blew up my kitchen?"
"Sort of…"
"Well, then I think my friends are doing all right. Especially my boyfriend." He added and hooked his hands on top of Renji's.
Renji raised an eyebrow in surprise. "I'm promoted to 'boyfriend' now? Next I'll have to meet yer family. Maybe we'll even consider sexual intercourse."
Ichigo laughed at that. Each time he tried to think about their first time all he could remember was a haze of alcohol, and the sting the next day. The second time was better, he decided.
"Maybe we should. It is my birthday and all." Ichigo propped himself up and leaned on his elbows somewhat suggestively. Renji smiled and placed his hands on Ichigo's shoulders, leaning forward. Their lips were barely an inch apart, and Ichigo felt Renji's breath over his face, his red hair brushing his cheek.
"Happy birthday, boyfriend."
That time was by far the best.
END