Eon Flunky's Blue Book Guide to DA Ladies.
Enclosed herein is a list of every female on the island, a quick summary, and an overall datability rating on a scale of 1 to 10. Datability is defined by physical attractiveness, personality, and any other conditional modifiers I see fit. Bear in mind that this is based largely on my opinion and done because I was bored.
FIRST YEAR STUDENTS
Osiris Red
Hikari, Hoshi | 6/10
A cute one to start out with. She has a lot of chutzpah, but any attempts on dating her will be met with resistance as she struggles with her gender identity. In short, she claims to be a man. How she can do that with a body like hers is beyond me.
Minadzuki, Aka | 4/10
I don't know, maybe it was just a bad first impression when she threatened to shoot me with an arrow. However, she has a certain 'Miko' charm to her... what with the high ponytail, and I bet she'd look good in one of those shrine outfits. Any attempts to hit on her will likely be met with tsundere at best, and death at worst.
Yuusha, Izumi | 7/10
She's a firecracker, plain and simple. Outgoing, friendly, at least as likely to hit on you as you on her. I have doubts about her ability to stay focused long enough for any sort of committed relationship, but definitely worth a first date and maybe a second.
Ra Yellow
Grant, Alexandra | 8/10
She'd give the shirt off her back to anyone who needs it. I might have to take her up on that offer soon. Seriously, though, she's nice, passionate, and pretty cute to boot. I'm actually amazed she's not already taken.
Obelisk Blue
Sakamaku, Erika | 2/10
Biiiiitch bitch bitch bitch. I dunno, maybe if you're into high-maintenance 'treat me like a queen' types. She'll drain your wallet, though, and I'm willing to bet she'd never put out.
SECOND YEAR STUDENTS
Osiris Red
Barton, Hannelore | 5/10
She's eager, but she has critical existence issues that make her hard to date. I mean, you might see her once or twice in an entire month. It makes me wonder what she's doing with all that free time...
Hayes, Joan | 7/10
She's hot, but she's slow. If you're dating her, you're going to end up having to protect her from herself. It's not that she's a bad girl--she's one of the sweetest people you'll ever meet, but... she's the sort who forgets how to breathe sometimes. (Joan, if you're reading this, remember to inhale AND exhale). That said... she's hot.
Maeromune, Melissa | 7/10
I only know that she's hot and that she's got pink hair. She's usually late to the party, and the 'recently freed from demon possession' thing might turn some guys off, but screw that, I say! A girl like that HAS to be looking for someone to support her through those tough times. Plus, she's nice and just looking for friends.
Miyamoto, Kanan | 3/10
Nobody really knows what she wants in a relationship. Does she want what's done in her doujins? Does she secretly want her best friend? Is she asexual? Hell, I don't even know that, and it's my business to know. Pursue if you want, but it'll probably end badly.
Moesakaru, Hina | 4/10
She gets a 4 only because this is a 'dating' guide and Hina is not much for serious dating. She's a unique sort of high-energy party gal, and her para-para abilities are second to none. She's usually up for a party or an invite to dinner, but don't expect much more than a simple one-night fling to come from it. (This may still be worth it, as she's a firecracker in bed.)
Sakuma, Lily | 5/10
I felt it would be necessary to start her at a 10 out of 10, if only for old time's sake. She's tall, slender, graceful, and she has excellent assets. Sure, she has weird kinks, but who doesn't? The only reason she's a 5 is named Jin Honjou, and I'd like to say he's a lucky son of a bitch.
Ra Yellow
Sullivan, Amanda | 4/10
All I know about her is that she grows wings, shoots magic, can see weird energy signatures, and ships Jin/Riku. I also know that she seems to enjoy tormenting people she might actually like. Maybe it's just me, but that's a turn-off. Still cute, though.
Takashi, Chizuma | 2/10
The only woman on earth who can take pictures that would make me jealous, she doesn't show up much... but when she does it's enough to make me wish she didn't bat for the other team. Sorry, guys, she's not into us.
Obelisk Blue
Honjou, Jo | 2/10
At some point she randomly came out of the closet. It's a shame... someone nice and sweet like her could make any guy (and most girls) deliriously happy. Unfortunately, I think she has a thing for Chizuma or Amy.
Kouna, Miru | 6/10
Yes, yes, I know she's blind. However, despite that she's one of the cutest people on the island. A lovely lady, she's also the sort who has a big heart and doesn't judge anything based on appearances. I didn't mean that as a pun. If she'd just be a little more outgoing towards her fellow students, she'd probably find someone.. but she seems a bit aloof.
THIRD YEAR STUDENTS
Ra Yellow
Ikuhara, Ren | 5/10
Again, 10 of 10, she's a girl I had the pleasure of getting to know over the course of the summer. She's an amazing cook, she's got the biggest heart of any girl I've ever met, she's cute, and she has the most adorable tan lines. But, like all green grass, she's on the other side of the fence that is Amado Tsukayama.
Obelisk Blue
Tsukayama, Reiko | 3/10
Before you get any ideas! She'll be 14 in a year. I'm evaluating her for when she is legal.
I'm probably just bitter because she hit me in the crotch. If her mum's any indication, she's going to be quite the delicious apple when she grows up, and her serious nature is definitely the sort that underlies a woman's heart. However, she will hit you in the crotch. That... That's just not kosher.
STAFF MEMBERS
Kaito, Akira | 3/10
She scares me. I've seen her step on a nail and not flinch. Beyond that, I've seen her duel disk in a private product catalog for Lilacorp. I'm forced to wonder what the connection is there, they're not something sold in an average store, and you can't afford something like that on a teacher's salary. Makes you wonder what she was doing before this job... She's also very robotic, really... there's just something that's off about every part of her. Uncanny Valley, don't you think? At least she's pretty.
Melancholy, Zaniah | 6/10
Tsuntsun incarnate. There seems to be a lot of baggage with this girl, something about some dark magic or something, I never really paid attention to the details. The point is, if you've ever seen her smile, you know exactly what I'm talking about. I mean a real smile, not one of those 'Kill you' ones. She also has a weakness for kittens.
Tsukayama, Omasu | 5/10
She's flirtatious, has a dynamite body, is soft in all the right places, and is married to someone else. God damn it. Still a definite hottie... and I swear I've never meant a single bad thing I've said about her. It was just to get Amado to shut the hell up.
FIRST YEAR STUDENTS
Osiris Red
Hikari, Hoshi | 6/10
A cute one to start out with. She has a lot of chutzpah, but any attempts on dating her will be met with resistance as she struggles with her gender identity. In short, she claims to be a man. How she can do that with a body like hers is beyond me.
Minadzuki, Aka | 4/10
I don't know, maybe it was just a bad first impression when she threatened to shoot me with an arrow. However, she has a certain 'Miko' charm to her... what with the high ponytail, and I bet she'd look good in one of those shrine outfits. Any attempts to hit on her will likely be met with tsundere at best, and death at worst.
Yuusha, Izumi | 7/10
She's a firecracker, plain and simple. Outgoing, friendly, at least as likely to hit on you as you on her. I have doubts about her ability to stay focused long enough for any sort of committed relationship, but definitely worth a first date and maybe a second.
Ra Yellow
Grant, Alexandra | 8/10
She'd give the shirt off her back to anyone who needs it. I might have to take her up on that offer soon. Seriously, though, she's nice, passionate, and pretty cute to boot. I'm actually amazed she's not already taken.
Obelisk Blue
Sakamaku, Erika | 2/10
Biiiiitch bitch bitch bitch. I dunno, maybe if you're into high-maintenance 'treat me like a queen' types. She'll drain your wallet, though, and I'm willing to bet she'd never put out.
SECOND YEAR STUDENTS
Osiris Red
Barton, Hannelore | 5/10
She's eager, but she has critical existence issues that make her hard to date. I mean, you might see her once or twice in an entire month. It makes me wonder what she's doing with all that free time...
Hayes, Joan | 7/10
She's hot, but she's slow. If you're dating her, you're going to end up having to protect her from herself. It's not that she's a bad girl--she's one of the sweetest people you'll ever meet, but... she's the sort who forgets how to breathe sometimes. (Joan, if you're reading this, remember to inhale AND exhale). That said... she's hot.
Maeromune, Melissa | 7/10
I only know that she's hot and that she's got pink hair. She's usually late to the party, and the 'recently freed from demon possession' thing might turn some guys off, but screw that, I say! A girl like that HAS to be looking for someone to support her through those tough times. Plus, she's nice and just looking for friends.
Miyamoto, Kanan | 3/10
Nobody really knows what she wants in a relationship. Does she want what's done in her doujins? Does she secretly want her best friend? Is she asexual? Hell, I don't even know that, and it's my business to know. Pursue if you want, but it'll probably end badly.
Moesakaru, Hina | 4/10
She gets a 4 only because this is a 'dating' guide and Hina is not much for serious dating. She's a unique sort of high-energy party gal, and her para-para abilities are second to none. She's usually up for a party or an invite to dinner, but don't expect much more than a simple one-night fling to come from it. (This may still be worth it, as she's a firecracker in bed.)
Sakuma, Lily | 5/10
I felt it would be necessary to start her at a 10 out of 10, if only for old time's sake. She's tall, slender, graceful, and she has excellent assets. Sure, she has weird kinks, but who doesn't? The only reason she's a 5 is named Jin Honjou, and I'd like to say he's a lucky son of a bitch.
Ra Yellow
Sullivan, Amanda | 4/10
All I know about her is that she grows wings, shoots magic, can see weird energy signatures, and ships Jin/Riku. I also know that she seems to enjoy tormenting people she might actually like. Maybe it's just me, but that's a turn-off. Still cute, though.
Takashi, Chizuma | 2/10
The only woman on earth who can take pictures that would make me jealous, she doesn't show up much... but when she does it's enough to make me wish she didn't bat for the other team. Sorry, guys, she's not into us.
Obelisk Blue
Honjou, Jo | 2/10
At some point she randomly came out of the closet. It's a shame... someone nice and sweet like her could make any guy (and most girls) deliriously happy. Unfortunately, I think she has a thing for Chizuma or Amy.
Kouna, Miru | 6/10
Yes, yes, I know she's blind. However, despite that she's one of the cutest people on the island. A lovely lady, she's also the sort who has a big heart and doesn't judge anything based on appearances. I didn't mean that as a pun. If she'd just be a little more outgoing towards her fellow students, she'd probably find someone.. but she seems a bit aloof.
THIRD YEAR STUDENTS
Ra Yellow
Ikuhara, Ren | 5/10
Again, 10 of 10, she's a girl I had the pleasure of getting to know over the course of the summer. She's an amazing cook, she's got the biggest heart of any girl I've ever met, she's cute, and she has the most adorable tan lines. But, like all green grass, she's on the other side of the fence that is Amado Tsukayama.
Obelisk Blue
Tsukayama, Reiko | 3/10
Before you get any ideas! She'll be 14 in a year. I'm evaluating her for when she is legal.
I'm probably just bitter because she hit me in the crotch. If her mum's any indication, she's going to be quite the delicious apple when she grows up, and her serious nature is definitely the sort that underlies a woman's heart. However, she will hit you in the crotch. That... That's just not kosher.
STAFF MEMBERS
Kaito, Akira | 3/10
She scares me. I've seen her step on a nail and not flinch. Beyond that, I've seen her duel disk in a private product catalog for Lilacorp. I'm forced to wonder what the connection is there, they're not something sold in an average store, and you can't afford something like that on a teacher's salary. Makes you wonder what she was doing before this job... She's also very robotic, really... there's just something that's off about every part of her. Uncanny Valley, don't you think? At least she's pretty.
Melancholy, Zaniah | 6/10
Tsuntsun incarnate. There seems to be a lot of baggage with this girl, something about some dark magic or something, I never really paid attention to the details. The point is, if you've ever seen her smile, you know exactly what I'm talking about. I mean a real smile, not one of those 'Kill you' ones. She also has a weakness for kittens.
Tsukayama, Omasu | 5/10
She's flirtatious, has a dynamite body, is soft in all the right places, and is married to someone else. God damn it. Still a definite hottie... and I swear I've never meant a single bad thing I've said about her. It was just to get Amado to shut the hell up.