Weirdness
So yeah, something interesting has been happening to me lately. First off, let me preface this by saying that I deeply believe in matters of the occult, and that I have a very intimate, first-hand reason for my beliefs. Not something I care to discuss here, but suffice it to say that whether or not you personally believe in magic (or magick, or majick, or however you choose to spell it), I do and I always have. Aside from the event that happened to me in early 1993 which cemented my belief, my family has a long history of brushings with the supernatural. When my great grandfather on my mother's mother's side lay dying, my grandmother and mother were witness to a visit by my departed great grandmother. And my mother has a VERY long history of precognitive dreams involving bridges and airplane disasters.
So obviously, I definitely believe in the supernatural and I believe that there is FAR more to this universe than we as a species understand. And lately, I've felt a side of myself awakening that I had buried a long time ago. I'm very fortunate that this time I have someone knowledgable and true that I can trust to help me get through this. Especially last night, because there was something doing something very unpleasant to me, and I could visualise it as a not-very-friendly blob of unhappy emotions. Thankfully, my knowledgable friend was able to help me handle the situation, and now that the unwelcome houseguest has vacated things are so much better. I'd like to be able to explain it better than that, but I can't. All I can say is that it's kind of like all the stress and worry and depression I've been feeling lately actually manifested itself into a sort of "spiritual presence", and now that it's gone my outlook and overall state of mind are soooo much better.
But I'm still left with this weird feeling like a part of me is waking up and trying to exert itself, and I still don't know what it is or how to deal with it. It's like a kind of static electricity building up in me. And I have this really overwhelming urge to read up on magic and the various paths of study (wicca, druidism, chaos, buddhism, things like that) because this thing I have in me is related to that. I was on the phone with a friend last night, and just by extending my thoughts and focusing, I described the room my friend was in to great detail (and I've never been in that room nor seen any pictures of it, it's never even been described to me). It was cool and scary and unnerving and draining all at once, but it was also WAY outside the realm of my understanding. I don't know how I did it, but I did it. I want to explore this and develop it and see what comes of it. So, expect more entries like this as I expand my knowledge. I'm not going to go into a LOT of detail because it's pretty personal and it's fairly weird for me to be talking about it, but I want some sort of a record that I can look back on later.
Anyway, aside from that, today was pretty eventful. We had to call the police earlier because we thought that someone was illegally working on our cable line trying to tap into our connection. This isn't an unfounded concern, as ALL THREE apartments next to ours have repeatedly stolen our cable connection over the past 9 months. Well, it turns out that the person working on the line WAS authorised to be there, he was an independent Charter contractor that (for whatever reason) Charter had told us over the phone to call the police on. Apparently the operator that Kai spoke to misinformed us when she said that nobody was scheduled to be working on the line, so unfortunately we were pretty embarassed when the guy turned out to be legit. But, we had a good reason to be worried about it and we don't feel too bad about calling just to be on the safe side. We're both sick of losing our connection to the internet and having really crappy connection speeds.
So that's about it. Second Life is still absorbing both of us, I'm still waiting to hear back from that cow at the temping agency, and nothing else has really changed. Oh, Kai applied for a job at the Pepsi plant just across the street, so keep your fingers crossed that he gets it. We *really* need the money right now.