i don't even feel like posting much cause life seems pretty darn... simple. waking up before the crack of dawn in throbbing pain to the shower, to dilate, to have breakfast and lounge in a narcotic stupor till it's time to do it all over again. through this, think that my brain feels like it's turning to mush. i need to start doing something ( Read more... )

wondering why i was recently denied credit, i get copies of my credit report from the two agencies that deal with these matters in canada ( Read more... )

i'm tired of pain. not that it's ever fun, but feeling sore, unable to have do the most simplist of things, and being beholden to pain killers to make things... tolerable, ugh, it's not me nor what i expected ( Read more... )

it's so good to be back home in toronto, to the victorian grid rowhomes that go on forever in these flatlands. to the familiarity of the sri lankan family grocer to my right and the portuguese fish market on my left. back to the daily sojourns to cafes that serve as supper tables and mating grounds for the chosen families/friends-cum-lovers of all ( Read more... )

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i wish this was how i actually felt! i do suppose it's more of a metaphorical interpretation of surgery. in that regard it's true. in any respect, love the video, love the movie.

the past week has been one of the most difficult of my life. not that i wasn't prepared, but it's hard to really know how you're gonna react when you're in pain and can't do much of anything - physically or mentally - that you could do before. adding to that, my recovery hasn't been as quick as others here. it all surprised me cause i'm in pretty ( Read more... )

hi, i am alive ( Read more... )

stepping
into myself
into
the unknown
a step that reenforces my difference but
secures my self
a step that no one can take away


( Read more... )

that's that. i'm done, taking a break. doing nothing even remotely work-related for 4 weeks.

my jobs at hassle free clinic and at my youth group, my supervisor, and the two research project i'm working on - Trans PULSEand Y-GAP now all know this and this is something we're all gonna have to accept ( Read more... )

sitting next to a group a group of 3 travelling art students from paris in a cafe on rue ste.catherine here in montreal. i just gave them directions and we clumsily talked for about 5 minutes. i'm *pretty* sure they understood me and that they won't get lost. after all, it is -24 with the windchill outside this morning so i think bad directions ( Read more... )