The Time Traveler's Dad(s)?
Titre: The Time Traveler's Dad
Rating: R-ish because that's my default.
Disclaimer: I don't own. You don't sue. :)
Summary: (This is totally out of order isn't it?) The enterprise has an unexpected guest who claims to be the son of Captain Kirk and his CMO... but, not only do said CMO and Captain have no idea who the boy is, but they're both also pretty sure that they are both male.
There was an explosion in the transporter room followed by a scream, a human scream to be precise. Scotty wasted only half an instant staring dumbfounded at the ship's unannounced visitor, before paging the doctor and seeing the unconscious body removed from the reach of the transporter's all out mechanical meltdown.
****
"You're not gonna believe this."
It wasn't like his CMO to not get straight to the point immediately, so Captain James T. Kirk figured this was worth hearing. "Try me."
"That kid," he gestured, spastic with excitement, in the child's direction, "is genetically almost certain to be your son."
That wasn't what Kirk was expecting. "Hold on... what?"
Someone let out an irritated breath, and Kirk spun around to find and smirk at his communications officer. "Seriously, Kirk, with your rep, I'm just surprised this is the first child you've fathered."
The grin broadened. "I'll take that as a compliment."
McCoy cleared his throat. "Jim, grow the fuck up, and pay attention. That kid, there, is your son. And we are light-years away from any port. How the hell did he wind up on this ship?"
"Well, that was easy." All eyes fell upon the pale child who was now sitting up on the bio bed. "The difficult part was getting past your shields. But, I had a little something for that." The child grinned, pulling out of his pocket something that resembled a flashlight. "Memorize the lay of the ship, find out when you'd be flying by, and that's all it took really. My mum always said you were never careful, but I didn't think it'd be that easy... guess I overestimated you, Captain." The kid followed that with a spot-on impression of Jim's self-satisfied grin just to complete the insult.
"Woah, woah, woah, what are you, like five?" That was the wrong thing to say, Jim realized, as the child's face hardened. "I mean, how did you get here? There's no docks within range of any transporter, and no ships with the technology to transport you aboard have been detected. How did you get here?"
"Did you...not...catch...anything I was saying?" The kid said, glaring in disgust. "And for a minute there I believed you were the genius everyone made you out to be. Guess that was naive on my part. What you should really be concerning yourself about is how I managed to transport myself through time itself onto your ship, not just space, but time. I wont even attempt to explain that. Anyway, how I got here doesn't even matter...now that I've found you."
There was an ominous note in the boy's voice that put McCoy on alert for trouble. The captain seemed to have missed the cue, however, as he only moved closer to the child, as if trying to get a better look at him.
"Who are you?" He said, at last.
"Your son. That grumpy old doctor told you as much." The boy sneered. "Don't you pay any attention to what's being said?"
"Well, that's a matter of opinion, but who are you really? I mean, I get that I'm your father, but don't you have a name or something?"
"Tiberius Kirk."
"No way, I actually called you--? I mean," Jim stopped, catching the doctor's eye. "that's... interesting. How old are you... Tiberius?"
"It wasn't your idea to call me Tiberius, actually, it was my mum's. You see, she was sentimental like that. But, you can call me Tiber, anyway, everyone calls me that. Oh, and to answer your question, I can't answer that. You see, technically now, I don't exist since I've gone back in time... and I'll admit my calculations were a bit off, but this will do anyway. All you have to do is point me to my mum so I can tell her never to shack up with the likes of you, and everything will be alright... I mean, I'll never be born, but that's part of the reason I'm here anyway."
"This is too weird... wait, so you're trying to make it so you're never born, what are you suicidal?" He'd said the wrong thing again. "I mean--"
"It's okay, Captain. Your question was justified. I suppose in a sense suicidal isn't an inaccurate description, as I am seeking to put a stop to my existence... but not by offing myself, but by preventing my birth from ever happening. So, in other words I will be altering the course of time in order to keep myself from ever existing... and also to save your life." Tiber hopped off the bio bed and headed for the nearest computer. "Computer, find location of--"
"Hey, I don't need saving. And, wait who's your mother?"
The boy frowned as the computer told him there was no such crew-member on board. "This can't be right... she was with you from the very start... she's the reason you are here at all... how can she not be in the records?"
"Who is she?"
"My mother, your best friend, you know the girl who sneaked you on the Enterprise, Lenore McCoy, your chief medical officer, that's who!"
There was silence in the room. Then, the CMO cleared his throat. "You must be mistaken, Kid, I'm the only Doctor McCoy on this ship and I am the one who snuck Jim onto the Enterprise. I don't know of any Lenore."
The kid looked at McCoy with suspicion. "Then, who threw up on the Captain on the transport shuttle to the academy?"
"You're looking at him." McCoy said, sounding somehow irritated and amused at the same time.
"This is all wrong..." Tiber's face creased in frustration. "This is all wrong, you aren't the right McCoy. What about your ex-spouse? Did you have a daughter before you met my dad."
"Yes... look, Kid, you seem to be under the impression that I'm in some kind of relationship with the Captain..."
"Yes, you are. Well, maybe not yet, but shut up, let me think." The resemblance was striking, the boy frowned and became Doctor McCoy in miniature. "I must have landed in the wrong reality...some kind of parallel universe. This is awkward... I guess I don't have to tell you anything then, so I'll just be off then..." He pulled out the flashlight again and pressed a button. Nothing happened. He swore, knocking the flashlight against the bio bed. "Come on, seriously, don't do this, come on, come on!" The flashlight sputtered and then shut off emitting a puff of black smoke. "No! You goddamned piece of quantum-mechanical crap!" He definitely resembled the doctor in a couple of ways.
"Are you... having trouble there?" The Captain guessed.
"You bet your Captaining ass there's something wrong... I'd be just fine if this stupid piece of crap would just...work!" After a moment Tiber gave up. "Well, it looks like I'm going to be here for a while longer than I'd expected..." He surveyed the room, before extending a hand and an unexpected smile. "Hi, I'm Tiberius David Kirk..."
****
Rating: R-ish because that's my default.
Disclaimer: I don't own. You don't sue. :)
Summary: (This is totally out of order isn't it?) The enterprise has an unexpected guest who claims to be the son of Captain Kirk and his CMO... but, not only do said CMO and Captain have no idea who the boy is, but they're both also pretty sure that they are both male.
There was an explosion in the transporter room followed by a scream, a human scream to be precise. Scotty wasted only half an instant staring dumbfounded at the ship's unannounced visitor, before paging the doctor and seeing the unconscious body removed from the reach of the transporter's all out mechanical meltdown.
****
"You're not gonna believe this."
It wasn't like his CMO to not get straight to the point immediately, so Captain James T. Kirk figured this was worth hearing. "Try me."
"That kid," he gestured, spastic with excitement, in the child's direction, "is genetically almost certain to be your son."
That wasn't what Kirk was expecting. "Hold on... what?"
Someone let out an irritated breath, and Kirk spun around to find and smirk at his communications officer. "Seriously, Kirk, with your rep, I'm just surprised this is the first child you've fathered."
The grin broadened. "I'll take that as a compliment."
McCoy cleared his throat. "Jim, grow the fuck up, and pay attention. That kid, there, is your son. And we are light-years away from any port. How the hell did he wind up on this ship?"
"Well, that was easy." All eyes fell upon the pale child who was now sitting up on the bio bed. "The difficult part was getting past your shields. But, I had a little something for that." The child grinned, pulling out of his pocket something that resembled a flashlight. "Memorize the lay of the ship, find out when you'd be flying by, and that's all it took really. My mum always said you were never careful, but I didn't think it'd be that easy... guess I overestimated you, Captain." The kid followed that with a spot-on impression of Jim's self-satisfied grin just to complete the insult.
"Woah, woah, woah, what are you, like five?" That was the wrong thing to say, Jim realized, as the child's face hardened. "I mean, how did you get here? There's no docks within range of any transporter, and no ships with the technology to transport you aboard have been detected. How did you get here?"
"Did you...not...catch...anything I was saying?" The kid said, glaring in disgust. "And for a minute there I believed you were the genius everyone made you out to be. Guess that was naive on my part. What you should really be concerning yourself about is how I managed to transport myself through time itself onto your ship, not just space, but time. I wont even attempt to explain that. Anyway, how I got here doesn't even matter...now that I've found you."
There was an ominous note in the boy's voice that put McCoy on alert for trouble. The captain seemed to have missed the cue, however, as he only moved closer to the child, as if trying to get a better look at him.
"Who are you?" He said, at last.
"Your son. That grumpy old doctor told you as much." The boy sneered. "Don't you pay any attention to what's being said?"
"Well, that's a matter of opinion, but who are you really? I mean, I get that I'm your father, but don't you have a name or something?"
"Tiberius Kirk."
"No way, I actually called you--? I mean," Jim stopped, catching the doctor's eye. "that's... interesting. How old are you... Tiberius?"
"It wasn't your idea to call me Tiberius, actually, it was my mum's. You see, she was sentimental like that. But, you can call me Tiber, anyway, everyone calls me that. Oh, and to answer your question, I can't answer that. You see, technically now, I don't exist since I've gone back in time... and I'll admit my calculations were a bit off, but this will do anyway. All you have to do is point me to my mum so I can tell her never to shack up with the likes of you, and everything will be alright... I mean, I'll never be born, but that's part of the reason I'm here anyway."
"This is too weird... wait, so you're trying to make it so you're never born, what are you suicidal?" He'd said the wrong thing again. "I mean--"
"It's okay, Captain. Your question was justified. I suppose in a sense suicidal isn't an inaccurate description, as I am seeking to put a stop to my existence... but not by offing myself, but by preventing my birth from ever happening. So, in other words I will be altering the course of time in order to keep myself from ever existing... and also to save your life." Tiber hopped off the bio bed and headed for the nearest computer. "Computer, find location of--"
"Hey, I don't need saving. And, wait who's your mother?"
The boy frowned as the computer told him there was no such crew-member on board. "This can't be right... she was with you from the very start... she's the reason you are here at all... how can she not be in the records?"
"Who is she?"
"My mother, your best friend, you know the girl who sneaked you on the Enterprise, Lenore McCoy, your chief medical officer, that's who!"
There was silence in the room. Then, the CMO cleared his throat. "You must be mistaken, Kid, I'm the only Doctor McCoy on this ship and I am the one who snuck Jim onto the Enterprise. I don't know of any Lenore."
The kid looked at McCoy with suspicion. "Then, who threw up on the Captain on the transport shuttle to the academy?"
"You're looking at him." McCoy said, sounding somehow irritated and amused at the same time.
"This is all wrong..." Tiber's face creased in frustration. "This is all wrong, you aren't the right McCoy. What about your ex-spouse? Did you have a daughter before you met my dad."
"Yes... look, Kid, you seem to be under the impression that I'm in some kind of relationship with the Captain..."
"Yes, you are. Well, maybe not yet, but shut up, let me think." The resemblance was striking, the boy frowned and became Doctor McCoy in miniature. "I must have landed in the wrong reality...some kind of parallel universe. This is awkward... I guess I don't have to tell you anything then, so I'll just be off then..." He pulled out the flashlight again and pressed a button. Nothing happened. He swore, knocking the flashlight against the bio bed. "Come on, seriously, don't do this, come on, come on!" The flashlight sputtered and then shut off emitting a puff of black smoke. "No! You goddamned piece of quantum-mechanical crap!" He definitely resembled the doctor in a couple of ways.
"Are you... having trouble there?" The Captain guessed.
"You bet your Captaining ass there's something wrong... I'd be just fine if this stupid piece of crap would just...work!" After a moment Tiber gave up. "Well, it looks like I'm going to be here for a while longer than I'd expected..." He surveyed the room, before extending a hand and an unexpected smile. "Hi, I'm Tiberius David Kirk..."
****