Fic: "Witch Among the Muggles" for ciela_night

Apr 11, 2006 14:59

Title: Witch Among the Muggles
Author: rosefyre
Recipient's name: ciela_night
Rating: PG-13
Character(s): Hannah Abbott
Warnings: minor canonical character death


Hannah Abbott isn't certain she wants to be a witch anymore.

She's sitting, dressed all in black, at her mother's funeral, as the priest performs the service. She's always hated funerals, hated the atmosphere and the almost-strangers who come to say goodbye to the dearly departed, no matter how far apart they actually were in life.

Hannah's not crying, though both of her sisters are. She cried when she found out, when she was pulled out of class and told that her mother was dead. But she can't cry now, now that she's had time to think about it.

Afterwards, after they put Mother in the ground, the strangers are much the same as always - they say they're sorry about Mother, then wish her well at school, and pry slightly to see where she's going these days, since Hannah isn't at the same school as Dorothy went to and Elizabeth goes to. Of course, Hannah doesn't say, but this time it's more upsetting, because of course no one can know, but…

But she wants to yell that there's a war out there and how can they be so blind as to think that the deaths are actually gang murders, or medical accidents, or whatever they think they are? It's the Death Eaters, working for You-Know-Who, and they're after the Muggleborns.

Even her family doesn't really understand. Hannah's kept everything a secret, not telling her parents about the monster of Slytherin in her second year, or how Justin was petrified for over half the year because of the monster. She didn't tell them that Sirius Black was a wizard, who was out to get one of her classmates, or about the dementors in third year. She mentioned the Triwizard Tournament, but not the end of it - not Cedric and Harry's disappearance, and definitely not Cedric's death. They don't know about Umbridge, or Dumbledore's Army, or really anything that happened last year other than Hannah's stress over the OWLs. Justin's parents know more than hers do, because he was petrified and the school had to tell them, but he also keeps secrets. They discuss it sometimes, about how hard it is, not being able to tell your family everything that's going on.

When they return home, there is silence, and all five of them - Father, Dorothy, Ian, Hannah, and Elizabeth - sit in the sitting room and pretend they're just fine.

They're not, of course.

"Why Mother?" Elizabeth asks eventually, her voice cracking as tears run down her face. Father shakes his head, not knowing how to answer, and Dorothy and Ian exchange glances.

Hannah just sits in her chair, squeezed as far back as she can go, biting her lip.

"I miss her already," Dorothy says quietly. Ian nods.

"It was her time," Father says. The others don't agree, Hannah can see, and she certainly doesn't.

"Who'd have ever known Mother's blood pressure was such a problem? She seemed so healthy," Ian adds, and even his voice is crackling.

And suddenly, Hannah can't take it anymore.

"She didn't die of a heart attack."

Four faces snap to her chair. All of them are faintly accusing - how did she know this and not tell them? Has she been hiding anything else?

"What do you mean, Hannah?" Father asks, fighting to keep his voice calm.

"I haven't been completely honest with you." She bites her lip again. "Oh, everything I've said is true, but it's not everything. The Wizarding World is…a wonderful place, but it's also a horrible one, and right now…right now it's at its worst." She can't face them. "There's an evil wizard, who wants to rule the world, and…one of his goals is to get rid of Muggles, and Muggleborns. Mother was killed by some of his followers because she's related to me. I suspect the only reason she's the only one dead is because no one else was home when they came."

"She died of a heart attack, the doctors said so," Dorothy says, skeptical as always. Dorothy's the questioner in the family. She'd have been a Ravenclaw if she’d gone to Hogwarts.

"I'm certain the tests say so, but Mother didn't die of a heart attack." Four looks of disbelief point her way. "Oh, you're all so oblivious! Or maybe not. Maybe you're all Obliviated. They can erase memories, you know. If you'd seen anything, I suspect you wouldn't remember, and the doctors were probably convinced that a heart attack happened, by having their memories erased and then filled in by some Ministry wizard."

"What?" Elizabeth doesn't appear to like that idea very much at all. Not surprising. Hannah's never liked the idea of Obliviation. It seems…almost like a form of rape, sometimes. And maybe worse than actual rape. Because you can’t even know that it happened.

"Mother was killed because she's a Muggle and I, her daughter, am a witch. She died because I was a member of Dumbledore's Army, or the Defense Association, or whatever you want to call it. She probably died first because I'm always first alphabetically, and Hermione's list arranged itself that way." She shrugs, thinking. "I don't know why Hermione's parents aren't dead - you'd think they'd go after Harry's friends first. They're probably protected, somehow. Maybe nobody expected the Death Eaters to go after the Muggles yet, or at least not specific Muggles, or at least not for those of us who aren’t so directly involved as Hermione. I don't know." She takes a deep breath, trying to keep calm. "But Mother's dead, and it's all because of me."

And that's when it gets to be too much, when the stress is piled on even higher than the OWLs or the hour or so spent waiting for Harry and Cedric to return from wherever they went at the end of the Triwizard Tournament.

Hannah must have stood at some point during her tirade, because now she sinks down to the floor and buries her face in her knees and begins, once more, to cry.

"Oh, Hannah," Father says, and he's next to her and rubbing her back, and somehow that makes the tears come harder than before. "You should have told us earlier."

"Are we in danger now?" Ian asks, practical as ever.

"I don't know," Hannah says. "Probably not, because they got Mother, and I don't think they'll know or care about the rest of my family. And anyway, there's still the rest of the Muggleborns from the DA - Justin, and Dean Thomas, and the Creevey brothers, and Hermione, if they can get her family, and Anthony Goldstein, and Alicia Spinnet. And the others, who aren't Muggleborns. They've already hurt Susan, and Harry, and maybe some others." She sighs, finally successfully fighting the tears. "Maybe I'll stay here, where I can protect you, even if my wand's watched."

"No," Father says firmly, and Hannah looks up, surprised. "If you can find a way to keep us safer that doesn't involve you staying here, that might be a good idea. But don't leave school because of this."

Dorothy nods. "That's what they want you to do."

"You'll just be giving in if you do," Ian adds.

"So go back, and fight, and kick their arses," Elizabeth adds. Everyone looks at her in shock. "What? I'm fourteen, I do know what an arse is."

"Alright," Hannah says, standing slowly. "Alright. I'll get someone to put up more wards over here, and then I'll go back to school."

She's glad her family supports her, as they hug, showing unaccustomed emotion, and then go upstairs. Lying in her bed, staring across the room at Dorothy (she used to share a room with Elizabeth, but now Elizabeth's the only one home, so she took Dorothy's old room for herself and Hannah and Dorothy share when they're home), she thanks her good fortune for giving her this family, who will support her and what she is even when it might kill them.

Hannah Abbott isn't certain she wants to be a witch anymore, but she is a witch, and no matter what happens, that isn't going to change.
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