18
No number signifies more
Then that adult defining
Porn spying
Cigarette trying
And close enough to beer buying
Number of numbers
18
Finally, adulthood presented w/ paper proof
And you can invite as many relatives to the party you want
But one is sure to show
Uncle Sam
Oh, but don’t get your hopes up
See he doesn’t come in person
He just mails a paper copy of his purpose
A selective service card
And your excited hands make that envelope open
Hoping for another graduation check
But your dreams are broken
When a resonating “I want you!”
Presents itself w/ spoken wisdom
From a fictional character
“I want you, to kill some Iraqi mother fuckers, Bin Laden bomb truckers, and some other unlucky suckers that happen to get in our way, what do you say?”
That’s a great and all Sam, but if I wanted to be shot at
I would go to my local high school
If I wanted to go to a desert
I would walk into my backyard
And if I wanted to beat up on other races
I would join the LAPD
So the offer you present me w/ is not unique
And don’t gimme that protecting freedom shit
Land of the free, Home of the
Underpaid Female worker
100-year old racist senator
Not-elected president
And home of the beaten to death child form Wyoming
Who got killed for speaking the words “I’m gay”
That’s not what we see, because we have to believe what’s on TV
And Danny Tanner never told us that American had Slavery
These are your so-called American values
Racism and prejudice are part of this balanced breakfast
“Leave it to Beaver” to tell us what in our “Family Matters”
But it doesn’t matter if you are “Bosom Buddies” or “Perfect Strangers”
Television is still trying to brainwash you
Lemonade stands are being replaced
And freedom stands are now erected in suburban areas
Freedom $.25
Well the freedom is just a little too sour
And the lies are a little to sugar coated
Because if America would have learned from its mistakes
Then I would be attending HOW TO NOT FUCK UP UNIVERISTY
But the versatility of America’s furtility is futile
So you see my dearest uncle
We can’t liberate other countries, until we start tolerating each other
We can’t teach them democracy, until we learn how to make it work
And we can’t save the poor , until we start giving our dimes, or at least a shit about our homeless
So until our homeland comes to its senses
The consensus seems to be that 18 needs to be redefined
18
It’s legal to fuck
Watch others fuck
And get fucked, by your good ole Uncle Sam
-Nick Klemp