[SG-1 + Eureka] [Gen] [K] Starting Over
Title: Starting Over
Genre: Gen, Humor
Length: 1275 words
Rating: Safe
Credits: Thanks to pixie_on_acid and daisycm83 for beta-reading and encouraging me.
Summary: Sam and Daniel head to Eureka on official business.
A/N: This is the first story in what will likely be a short series. The idea just amused me. I hope it amuses you too. Dedicated to daisycm83 for sharing the Eureka gleeeeeeee.
Starting Over
Sam and Daniel stepped out of what would normally be an unremarkable black sedan. Apparently, government-issue sedans weren’t unremarkable in this odd little town, judging by the attention they were garnering on Main Street. Passersby stopped to stare as the duo strode up the steps to the local sheriff’s office.
Sam blinked as they stepped through the door, eyes adjusting to the change from bright sunlight to the dimly-lit office. A young woman sat at the desk closest to the entrance. Daniel - normally the first to greet and communicate with anyone - seemed to be hanging back and waiting for Sam to speak. She made a mental note to compliment him on his instincts. It was clear that the woman behind the desk was not the kind to be won over by Daniel’s boyish charm.
Flashing her military ID, Sam stepped briskly to the desk. “Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter. Are you the sheriff?”
The woman looked Sam up and down in a careful assessment, apparently deciding in her favor. “Deputy Jo Lupo. The sheriff stepped out, but he should be back any minute now. Something I can help you with?”
Before Sam could answer, light flooded in from the doorway. A tall man stumbled through carrying a drink tray with two cups of coffee in one hand and a white take-out bag in the other. “Sorry it took so long, Jo. I offended Vincent when I asked him not to put anything weird on my turkey sandwich. Apparently, I’m the only one in town who finds curried avocado and tarragon mayonnaise weird.” Noticing the strangers, he stopped short. “Oh. Hi.”
Sam only stared in bemusement, so Daniel stepped forward. “Are you the sheriff?”
“Uh, yes.” He juggled the coffee tray to his other hand in an awkward attempt to offer a handshake. “Sheriff Jack Carter.”
Daniel took his hand, shooting Sam a grin as he repeated, “Jack Carter?” Sam noticed the sheriff’s eyes following the silent exchange, but he didn’t seem to mind not being in on the joke.
“And you are?” Sheriff Carter prompted as he released Daniel’s hand.
“Daniel Jackson, and this,” he said, gesturing to his companion, “is Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter, U.S. Air Force.”
Sheriff Carter turned, nearly dropping the coffees, and shook Sam’s hand. “Nice to meet you. I’ll be right with you folks.”
The sheriff set the take-out down on Jo’s desk and sorted out his from hers. Walking back to his desk with his lunch in hand, he gestured with his turkey sandwich for them to follow. He sat down, unwrapped his sandwich, and began picking off slices of curried avocado. “What can I do for the U.S. Air Force?”
Sam knew enough about this town to know the man had clearance and probably wouldn’t be all too surprised by what she had to say, so she just told it like it was. “We have a clone problem.”
The sheriff dropped his sandwich with a huff. “Now, wait a minute. We sorted out that whole Perkins problem. The DOD established that the living Mrs. Perkins is the original human being - she’s got the papers to prove it.”
Sam and Daniel looked at one another in confusion then back at the sheriff. “Uh, not your clones, our clones.”
It was Sheriff Carter’s turn to look confused. “Your clones?”
“We need a safe place to stash them,” Daniel clarified.
“Ohhh-kay. You have clones. And you want me to… what? Store them for you? Are they in some sort of cryogenic chamber, or do you just keep them in the back of a u-haul?”
“We’re serious, Sheriff. A… well, a classified operation resulted in the production of teenage clones of six members of our team. One of them has been out in the general population for a while, trying to fit in and lead a normal life, and it’s not working out very well. When the other five were… uh, created, it was decided that we needed a more secure location.”
Sam added, “All of them have direct knowledge of classified information. In the wrong hands, any of them could be a threat to national security.”
Sheriff Carter rubbed his temples. “All right. So, the Air Force is moving six teenage clones into Eureka. Why exactly is this my business?”
“Well, our clones - Colonel Carter’s and mine, I mean - won’t be any trouble. But the other four, we’re going to need you to keep an eye on.”
“Particularly Vala Maldoran,” Sam said with a sardonic smile. “The other three may be… high-spirited, but her you’ll really have to watch out for.”
“Let me guess,” Sheriff Carter said. “Lots of attitude, loud mouth, does whatever she wants?” Sam and Daniel nodded and the sheriff grimaced. “Yeah, I’ve got one of those.”
“Not quite like this one,” Daniel assured him.
“You might be surprised,” the sheriff muttered. “So. Have you enrolled them in school?”
“That’s part of the reason we’re moving them here, actually,” Sam replied. “So there won’t be those kinds of expectations. They may be teenagers physically, but intellectually, they are adults. My clone will be working at Global Dynamics, and Colonel Mitchell and General O’Neill’s clones will consult on any work the company does in the fields of avionics and military weaponry. We’re hoping to set the others up in some kind of business.”
“Possibly a martial arts training center,” Daniel noted. Behind him, Deputy Lupo gave a disbelieving huff. Over his shoulder, he smiled slyly at her. “Two of them know a very advanced technique. It’s been called out of this world.” Sam gave Daniel a surreptitious pinch and he straightened up, setting the briefcase he was holding on the sheriff’s desk. “These are the dossiers on the clones: Jonathan O’Neill, Samantha Carter, Daniel Jackson, Cameron Mitchell, Vala Maldoran, and Murray Tealk.”
The sheriff looked up curiously at the way Dr. Jackson stumbled over the last name. His instincts told him there was something more there, and he doubted it was in the dossier. “What else aren’t you telling me?”
Daniel looked to Sam, handing her another folder. She pulled out a photograph of a man in an impeccably tailored suit and laid it on the desk. The smug smile reminded Sheriff Carter unpleasantly of Nathan Stark.
“The kids aren’t the only clones we have to worry about. There may be as many as eight copies of this man on the loose, and we have strong reason to believe he may come after our clones.” Sam pulled out another copy and passed it to Deputy Lupo as she continued. “We don’t know what alias he might use or under what pretense he might arrive in Eureka, but you need to be on the lookout. Shoot first and ask no questions later.”
Jo gave her a satisfied smile. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Jo, we’re not shooting anyone. That was a figure of speech, right?”
Sam turned to the sheriff again, handing him a document from the file. “Homew… Homeland Security has declared this man an enemy combatant and a threat to national security. Don’t take him lightly, Sheriff.”
Sheriff Carter glanced at Jo and sighed. She looked absolutely gleeful; that was always a bad sign. “Anything else we ought to know?”
“That about sums it up, Sheriff.” Daniel said. He snapped the briefcase closed. “The clones will be instructed to check in with you once they’ve arrived.”
“I can’t wait,” Sheriff Carter said dryly.
As they headed out the door, Daniel muttered to Sam, “Jack. Carter.”
“Hey!” Sheriff Carter called after him. “What’s so funny about my name?”
Daniel grinned at him as he held the door for Sam. “You’ll see.”
Genre: Gen, Humor
Length: 1275 words
Rating: Safe
Credits: Thanks to pixie_on_acid and daisycm83 for beta-reading and encouraging me.
Summary: Sam and Daniel head to Eureka on official business.
A/N: This is the first story in what will likely be a short series. The idea just amused me. I hope it amuses you too. Dedicated to daisycm83 for sharing the Eureka gleeeeeeee.
Starting Over
Sam and Daniel stepped out of what would normally be an unremarkable black sedan. Apparently, government-issue sedans weren’t unremarkable in this odd little town, judging by the attention they were garnering on Main Street. Passersby stopped to stare as the duo strode up the steps to the local sheriff’s office.
Sam blinked as they stepped through the door, eyes adjusting to the change from bright sunlight to the dimly-lit office. A young woman sat at the desk closest to the entrance. Daniel - normally the first to greet and communicate with anyone - seemed to be hanging back and waiting for Sam to speak. She made a mental note to compliment him on his instincts. It was clear that the woman behind the desk was not the kind to be won over by Daniel’s boyish charm.
Flashing her military ID, Sam stepped briskly to the desk. “Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter. Are you the sheriff?”
The woman looked Sam up and down in a careful assessment, apparently deciding in her favor. “Deputy Jo Lupo. The sheriff stepped out, but he should be back any minute now. Something I can help you with?”
Before Sam could answer, light flooded in from the doorway. A tall man stumbled through carrying a drink tray with two cups of coffee in one hand and a white take-out bag in the other. “Sorry it took so long, Jo. I offended Vincent when I asked him not to put anything weird on my turkey sandwich. Apparently, I’m the only one in town who finds curried avocado and tarragon mayonnaise weird.” Noticing the strangers, he stopped short. “Oh. Hi.”
Sam only stared in bemusement, so Daniel stepped forward. “Are you the sheriff?”
“Uh, yes.” He juggled the coffee tray to his other hand in an awkward attempt to offer a handshake. “Sheriff Jack Carter.”
Daniel took his hand, shooting Sam a grin as he repeated, “Jack Carter?” Sam noticed the sheriff’s eyes following the silent exchange, but he didn’t seem to mind not being in on the joke.
“And you are?” Sheriff Carter prompted as he released Daniel’s hand.
“Daniel Jackson, and this,” he said, gesturing to his companion, “is Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter, U.S. Air Force.”
Sheriff Carter turned, nearly dropping the coffees, and shook Sam’s hand. “Nice to meet you. I’ll be right with you folks.”
The sheriff set the take-out down on Jo’s desk and sorted out his from hers. Walking back to his desk with his lunch in hand, he gestured with his turkey sandwich for them to follow. He sat down, unwrapped his sandwich, and began picking off slices of curried avocado. “What can I do for the U.S. Air Force?”
Sam knew enough about this town to know the man had clearance and probably wouldn’t be all too surprised by what she had to say, so she just told it like it was. “We have a clone problem.”
The sheriff dropped his sandwich with a huff. “Now, wait a minute. We sorted out that whole Perkins problem. The DOD established that the living Mrs. Perkins is the original human being - she’s got the papers to prove it.”
Sam and Daniel looked at one another in confusion then back at the sheriff. “Uh, not your clones, our clones.”
It was Sheriff Carter’s turn to look confused. “Your clones?”
“We need a safe place to stash them,” Daniel clarified.
“Ohhh-kay. You have clones. And you want me to… what? Store them for you? Are they in some sort of cryogenic chamber, or do you just keep them in the back of a u-haul?”
“We’re serious, Sheriff. A… well, a classified operation resulted in the production of teenage clones of six members of our team. One of them has been out in the general population for a while, trying to fit in and lead a normal life, and it’s not working out very well. When the other five were… uh, created, it was decided that we needed a more secure location.”
Sam added, “All of them have direct knowledge of classified information. In the wrong hands, any of them could be a threat to national security.”
Sheriff Carter rubbed his temples. “All right. So, the Air Force is moving six teenage clones into Eureka. Why exactly is this my business?”
“Well, our clones - Colonel Carter’s and mine, I mean - won’t be any trouble. But the other four, we’re going to need you to keep an eye on.”
“Particularly Vala Maldoran,” Sam said with a sardonic smile. “The other three may be… high-spirited, but her you’ll really have to watch out for.”
“Let me guess,” Sheriff Carter said. “Lots of attitude, loud mouth, does whatever she wants?” Sam and Daniel nodded and the sheriff grimaced. “Yeah, I’ve got one of those.”
“Not quite like this one,” Daniel assured him.
“You might be surprised,” the sheriff muttered. “So. Have you enrolled them in school?”
“That’s part of the reason we’re moving them here, actually,” Sam replied. “So there won’t be those kinds of expectations. They may be teenagers physically, but intellectually, they are adults. My clone will be working at Global Dynamics, and Colonel Mitchell and General O’Neill’s clones will consult on any work the company does in the fields of avionics and military weaponry. We’re hoping to set the others up in some kind of business.”
“Possibly a martial arts training center,” Daniel noted. Behind him, Deputy Lupo gave a disbelieving huff. Over his shoulder, he smiled slyly at her. “Two of them know a very advanced technique. It’s been called out of this world.” Sam gave Daniel a surreptitious pinch and he straightened up, setting the briefcase he was holding on the sheriff’s desk. “These are the dossiers on the clones: Jonathan O’Neill, Samantha Carter, Daniel Jackson, Cameron Mitchell, Vala Maldoran, and Murray Tealk.”
The sheriff looked up curiously at the way Dr. Jackson stumbled over the last name. His instincts told him there was something more there, and he doubted it was in the dossier. “What else aren’t you telling me?”
Daniel looked to Sam, handing her another folder. She pulled out a photograph of a man in an impeccably tailored suit and laid it on the desk. The smug smile reminded Sheriff Carter unpleasantly of Nathan Stark.
“The kids aren’t the only clones we have to worry about. There may be as many as eight copies of this man on the loose, and we have strong reason to believe he may come after our clones.” Sam pulled out another copy and passed it to Deputy Lupo as she continued. “We don’t know what alias he might use or under what pretense he might arrive in Eureka, but you need to be on the lookout. Shoot first and ask no questions later.”
Jo gave her a satisfied smile. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Jo, we’re not shooting anyone. That was a figure of speech, right?”
Sam turned to the sheriff again, handing him a document from the file. “Homew… Homeland Security has declared this man an enemy combatant and a threat to national security. Don’t take him lightly, Sheriff.”
Sheriff Carter glanced at Jo and sighed. She looked absolutely gleeful; that was always a bad sign. “Anything else we ought to know?”
“That about sums it up, Sheriff.” Daniel said. He snapped the briefcase closed. “The clones will be instructed to check in with you once they’ve arrived.”
“I can’t wait,” Sheriff Carter said dryly.
As they headed out the door, Daniel muttered to Sam, “Jack. Carter.”
“Hey!” Sheriff Carter called after him. “What’s so funny about my name?”
Daniel grinned at him as he held the door for Sam. “You’ll see.”