Here's Part Three of What Is And What Should Never Be. It's full of sex, drama and a little bit of good old fashion humor. I hope you guys like it. Oh and it's really freakin' long too...
About a week after my affair with Jimmy, the band found themselves in Los Angeles and were reveling in the decadence of their newfound success. When they weren’t playing a show here or there, they were out at clubs getting acquainted with other celebrities, drinking and taking drugs. I usually vouched to hang back at the hotel for those outings, not wanting to find myself in a situation I couldn’t very well control. On those nights, I prayed that someone would be responsible enough to pick Robert up off the floor if he got roaring drunk, which he usually took the opportunity to do. On the occasional night that I would tag along, I just hoped not to be embarrassed, especially by Bonzo. He was a live wire, particularly when inebriated; he may have been nice to me but he wasn’t very to those around him.
Being around Jimmy was as hard if not harder then I had expected it to be. Since our short liaison together, he seemed to insist to stare at me even more with his eyes filled with so much longing that I thought my heart might burst. If in passing we touched even the slightest, he looked as if I had poisoned him. We somehow managed to have the same sort of intellectual conversations we’d had before and the chemistry hadn’t changed much; there was always a sort of sexual tension, but the very thought of our night of passion would throw me for a loop if I wasn’t careful.
It was on one of the band’s nights off that we were staying at the Hyatt in L.A., basking in the glory of last night’s concert. I was sitting in our hotel room looking out at the sunset when Robert approached me.
He stood behind the chair and gently ran his hands over my hair, “I have a surprise for you.”
I looked up at his now grinning face, “A surprise? What is it?”
Robert took one of my hands and pulled me up out of the chair, “You have to wait and see. Change into your swimsuit for now.” I raised an eyebrow at him, but did as I was told and went to my suitcase, dug out my red bikini and went into the bathroom. I changed into it quickly, tossed a t-shirt over it and slipped some sandals on. I came out to find Robert also in his swimwear waiting for me, “Come on, let’s go.” I took his hand and we headed for the elevator.
The Hyatt was a special sort of hotel- it had a roof pool that if gotten to at the right time could be the ultimate party. But I doubted very much it was open after dark so I wondered why we were going there in the first place. I did trust Robert however and so I didn’t question him, but went along for the ride.
When we arrived to the top floor and got out onto the roof, it was just as I’d suspected- no one was there. Yet curiously enough, the pool was lit and the lights around it were on. There were even two glasses and a bottle of champagne on a nearby table.
“What is this Robert?” I asked looking back at him with a smile.
He gestured to the pool, “Go ahead in the pool, love.”
Again I gave him a look but took off my t-shirt and stepped into the water which, thankfully, was heated. Robert went over to the table with the champagne on it; he opened it and poured the golden liquid out as I floated near the edge watching for an answer. Robert eyed me with a devious smirk as he handed me a glass. In the light, he looked angelic to me with his hair around his face. He set his glass where I had mine near the edge of the pool and then walked over to the steps and quickly swam over to me. He had a huge smile on his face as he put his arms around me and I put mine around him.
“Now,” I began, “What is this all about?”
Robert looked deep into my eyes, “Happy Anniversary baby!”
I furrowed my brow in confusion; had I forgotten our wedding anniversary? No, I couldn’t have, no that was later in the year. So what was he talking about?
“What do you mean?”
“It’s the anniversary of the day we met in ’68. Remember, the pub?”
I suddenly understood and my heart melted, “Oh Robert, that’s so sweet!”
“I thought you’d appreciate it, so I got the pool for the night for us.”
“Oh this is just lovely! I have no idea what to even say,” I exclaimed finishing off my glass of champagne.
“Say you love me,” Robert replied pulling me tight to him and bringing an affectionate hand to my cheek.
“I love you,” I said softly and kissed his hand.
My lips then went straight for his, tenderly kissing this wonderful man who adored me so. Robert took my hand as I continued kissing him- his cheek, his collarbone and neck and he took us to more shallow waters where, to his surprise, I backed him against the wall and kissed him with passion, letting my hands roam his wet skin. He broke the kiss to take a breath, “Jules honey, slow down! I’m only one man.”
I giggled and bit my lip, “Sorry.” I wasn’t able to tell him how my time with Jimmy had left me with a streak of hunger to dominate. I kissed him slower this time and let us take our time.
Robert and I switched places in the process of kissing and now I could see the desire in his eyes as I was right where he wanted me. He started his usual trail of sweet kisses down my neck that he knew drove me out of my mind and I let out a sigh of appreciation. My feet left the ground and I moved upward, entwining my legs around his waist and moving up out of the water. Robert eagerly began to bury his face in my cleavage, kissing my breasts with fervor; I tilted my head and pushed his head towards me with gratitude. He then quickly pulled the strings holding up my top and so it fell off and he threw it to the side. I looked down on him in lust as he continued to kiss me and pay special attention my nipples. Robert put his hands on my shoulders, indicating he wanted me back at his level and I undid my legs and gasped slightly at the water on my hot flesh. I put my hands underwater and pulled my bikini bottoms down and let them float where they would. The water felt cool against my naked skin as I smirked and dunked my head under. I swam around Robert once and then pulled on his shorts. When I appeared in front of him again, pushing the hair from my face, Robert had a slight blush to his cheeks and I gave him a knowing smile.
“You’re a naughty girl aren’t you?” he questioned holding me tightly. I attempted a reply but my longing overtook me as I could feel him press against me; I instead kissed him open mouth as I had before and this time he didn’t complain about my being forward. He and I became one once again by the shimmering light on the pool and I was in ecstasy. Damn everything, I loved this man! We moved in time and I tried to repress my moans of his name for the other hotel patrons, however, when Robert yelled my name out I forwent politeness and let the sound come from deep within me. We heaved until, both reading our apex, my head went limp on his shoulder and breathing came slower. Robert ran his hands over my back lovingly and kissed my breasts once more before bringing me down to him. “Juliet, my angel,” he said hugging me. I exhaled in satisfaction.
Robert and I held each other a few seconds longer before I kissed his cheek and then swam across the pool.
“Where are you going?” Robert asked. It was adorable because he really sounded like I might leave him! I had no intention of it; I only wanted to swim and to feel the water against my skin. I hadn’t felt so free in a long time.
“Just over here,” I replied looking back at him. Once again, I was enthralled by his face and form; if I was his angel, he was also mine. I smiled at him, “Why don’t you come and get me?” I said it with a breathy tone of voice, as Marilyn Monroe or another Hollywood vamp may have and wilted my eyelids for a sultry look. Even from this small distance, I knew he would see the game I was playing with him.
Robert smiled evilly and surged through the water after me. I giggled and swam away from him; when I turned around however, he was nowhere to be found! I looked around the patio to see if he’d left the pool, and then I went pale- he was kidding and going to attack me, I just knew it. Filled with mixed excitement and fear, I searched the top of the water for any movement, but now it was too hard with the glare of the lights to see. I started back towards the steps slowly, but it was too late for escape- Robert sprang from behind and latched onto me around my waist. I squealed in surprise and he laughed at my reaction.
He turned me to face him, “Now I’ve got you, you minx! What are you going to do about it?” I struggled in vain to get away but couldn’t, “Can’t get away, can you? You’re all mine.”
“What if I don’t want to get away?” I replied again seductively. Robert’s reply was to growl and kiss me deeply; I moaned and kissed him back. Guess it was time for round two…
“Look out below!” I heard a male voice shout from above us. Robert and I stopped kissing just in time to see John Bonham headed our way in a cannonball. I screamed as Robert let me go and we swam in opposite directions as Bonzo splashed in the spot we had just been. He reached the surface seconds later, “You didn’t think you’re having a party without me did you?” He wriggled his eyebrows and looked at Robert, “Nice birthday suit Percy.” Robert went pale with embarrassment and I stifled a laugh as I swam to the pool’s edge covering my breasts. John Paul was there holding my bikini bottoms.
“Found these,” he said handing them to me with a sheepish grin. I slipped them on quickly as he averted his eyes, “I don’t know where the other part is though.” I bit my lip and looked around, ignoring Robert flaying his arms at Bonzo in anger. I noticed something red at the bottom of the pool pretty close by, so I dove down to it and sure enough, it was my top. Thank God, I thought. I reached the surface still covering myself and matched up my location to that of the stairs; they were across the pool and in the line of fire of Robert and Bonzo. I sighed and went under the water once again, swimming as quickly as I could to the other side. I came up for air about in the middle of their argument.
“Looking good Jules,” Bonzo commented as I covered myself again. I shook my head at him, begging him to stop exasperating Robert.
“Don’t you bloody talk to her like that Bonham!” Robert shouted point at his friend. I ignored it and was about to go the rest of the way to the steps when Robert called me, “Jules have you seen my shorts, love?”
“John Paul has,” I replied pointing to the bassist behind Robert with another discarded piece of clothing. As Robert went to recover them, still yelling, I dove the rest of the way to my exit.
As I came up to my destination, I turned to what I thought was the privacy of the way out to start to put my top on. I was startled to find Jimmy already standing there trying to hide a grin, “Hello Juliet.”
I held the top to my chest with both my hands I got out of the water, “Bleedin’ hell, you scared me! Can you help me tie the back of this thing?” I moved my hair away and turned around so he could assist me. Jimmy gingerly took hold of the strings to the bikini top and started tying them together.
Jimmy’s hands touched my back lightly and I felt electric pulse through my body and all the memories of us flood back to mind; damn I thought I’d forgotten! I tried to keep my body in check and not move as he secured the last of the top and I could move my hands, “There you are.”
I turned to face him, “Thank you.” He just smiled at me and I tried to hide my blush. I walked promptly to where John Paul stood and the champagne glasses were now up on the table with the bottle. I grabbed the bottle and poured myself, downing it, “Thanks for your help John Paul.”
“Sorry for disturbing you, it was Bonzo’s idea,” he replied and then nodded his head towards the pool, “Think they’ll ever stop?”
I looked and Robert and Bonzo were now attempting to drown each other, at least to teach the other some kind of lesson. I shook my head and shouted at them, “Oi, knock it off!” I poured myself another glass.
Robert, visibly still frustrated, let go of his hold around Bonzo’s neck and started walking out of the pool. Bonzo moved the hair out of his face and winked at me before exiting the pool himself. They both walked over to us, Robert’s face red in anger, “Bonzo said they’d been watching us!”
I almost choked on my champagne, “What?”
“Well it’s kind of hard to look away when our rooms are right above the pool, there’s a naked girl out here, and practically the whole city can hear you!” Bonzo said seizing the champagne bottle and downing some of it straight. He winked at me again, “Great show by the way Jules.”
I just grinned but Robert was still livid and went in for the kill, “I’m gonna murder you Bonham!”
Bonzo laughed and backed away, “If it makes you feel any better Jonesy and Pagey were there too! I wasn’t alone.”
I looked at John Paul and could see by the slight awkwardness on his face that Bonzo was telling the truth. Jimmy was just walking over to us smiling and he winked at me, a wink which I hoped only I had seen because I knew what it meant; he stood on the other side of me.
“Oh god,” I mumbled. Well that’s just how it goes, I thought. I looked at Robert who was about to throw a punch at Bonzo, “Robert darling, let it go!”
He looked back at me and sighed, the anger seeming to have left him immediately. He came over and lovingly touched my cheek, “Thank God for you. I was about to beat him into a bloody pulp!” He took up his champagne glass and poured some for himself.
But John Bonham, ever the mischief maker, wasn’t done yet. He backed away from the group, “Your wife is a loud one Percy.”
“That’s it!” Robert cried and setting his glass down, he ran after Bonzo who was more than happy he got the exact reaction he’d wanted.
I sighed and picked up the discarded glass. I looked at John Paul, “Champagne?” He laughed and took the glass from me as we watched the scene. Robert was chasing Bonzo around the pool; they did one lap before he finally got a hold of him, and lead singer and drummer fell into the pool with a huge splash. I was thankful though that when they came up for air, I could tell from Robert’s face that he was just playing around now, wrestling Bonzo as a brother would. They couldn’t afford another drummer, and wouldn’t find one as talented as Bonzo was. And I wasn’t about to go in there again and break them up! I suddenly felt a chill, being out of the pool but still wet, and so I looked behind me and spotted my t-shirt from before. I grabbed it up and put it on, rubbing my arms, “It’s freezing out here!”
“I can take you inside,” Jimmy offered.
“Oh…that’s alright. I’m sure I’ll warm up,” was my reply weakly as I ignored the nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach. Had that offer been code for something else? I wasn’t quite sure.
“Alright well, I’m headed back inside, let those two work out their business. I’ll see you guys later,” Jimmy said. As he walked past me I felt the edge of his shirt graze my back and I accidentally jumped a little; he looked back at me before I saw him disappear inside. He was sending me a message to follow him, I knew it! My nerves became warmth inside me as I thought again of the week before.
I sat down only a few moments before standing back up again and making an announcement, “Robert honey, I’m gonna go inside. Ok?” I set my glass down and hugged John Paul goodnight.
Robert looked up from the pool, “Aright love, I have the pool another hour though. So I guess I’ll have to murder Bonzo here some more.”
“Not if I have anything to say about it!” Bonzo shouted and attacked Robert. I laughed and went inside.
I took the elevator to the floor we were all occupying and tried to remember the room in which Jimmy was staying. I almost couldn’t believe myself and felt as if it weren’t my feet walking, as if it wasn’t me walking off to this other man who wasn’t my husband. I thought of the room and when I reached it, there was a “Do Not Disturb” sign on the door; I was confused but not deterred and turned the knob. Sure enough, it was unlocked and I knew no one in their right mind would leave their door unlocked unless they were expecting someone. This had to be Jimmy’s room.
I inched my way in ever so quietly but this plan was put to rest as a hand reached out and pulled me into the room, slamming the door behind me in an instant. I felt exhilaration rush through me as Jimmy pulled me to him and kissed me hard. The electricity I had felt earlier was now everywhere and uncontrollable as he held me tight to him. When he finally broke away to look at my face I was flabbergasted, “Hello.”
“I was worried you wouldn’t come,” he said and held me to his chest. He looked at me again and then held me more, “God I’ve missed you.”
I looked over his shoulder at the room before me; again, another hotel room was covered in candles and the blinds drawn. But this time all the candles were already lit and gave the room a magical effect that was unmistakably Jimmy, “It’s so romantic in here!”
Jimmy held me away from him by the arms and gave me a smirk, “Who said anything about romance?” I bit my lip as I looked up at him. Jimmy let out a slight whimper and held me close again, “I wish you wouldn’t do that.” A devious side in me came out as I smiled and bit at my lip again; Jimmy sighed and kissed me zealously. I was smiling inside as his arms wrapped around me and our tongues danced; for the moment he was under my powers and it felt marvelous.
It was literal minutes before Jimmy finally stopped kissing me and I was quite proud of my feat over him. His eyes had already darkened with desire as he ordered me around, “Take off the t-shirt and go lay on the bed.” I did what he said and threw the t-shirt aside and lay seductively across the bed, watching his every move. As he worked he’d look at me and I could almost see him weakening with every view. But he was trying hard to compose himself as he went to where his luggage was and took out a small black box. My heart fluttered; I had heard about the box, from groupies I hung out with backstage, it was like a myth. When Jimmy brought it over and sat next to me, he opened it and I knew that the rumors had been true- he pulled out a long leather whip first, his hands going across the length of it as he laid it carefully next to me. As he went to put the box back, I saw him take something else black from it but I couldn’t tell what it was. He then sat back down next to me and smiled a little, “You’ve been quite the bad girl haven’t you?”
I was afraid but I nodded in agreement, “Yes.”
“Hm, good,” he replied and looked me over, taking in every inch of my body, “I want you to take off your clothes and lay back down for me.” I felt at his power again as I stood up and stripped off my bikini and then laid back where I had been. Jimmy viewed me again as if, if he could make love to me with his eyes he would. A hand reached out towards my stomach and I closed my eyes and waited for his touch, but then he pulled back if only to show that touching me might kill him. I felt a sense of authority for a second as he turned away from me. He stood up quickly and tore his shirt off, exposing that flesh of his that I so desperately wanted to touch. Jimmy pointed at me and his voice was barely audible, “Turn over and lay on your stomach.”
I did what he said and turned and as I did I saw movement out of the corner of my eye and I knew that Jimmy was finishing taking his clothes off; my excitement and anticipation was building. He sat down again and I felt his hand run over my backside ever so delicately; it was strange to be touched there and so I just kept my face straight ahead at the wall. I felt his weight leave the bed and the whip picked up from my side. First he ran it lightly across my back, letting me feel the cool leather on my flesh. But next thing I knew the whip cracked against my skin, and I yelped in pain. I turned my head took take in a quick glimpse of Jimmy and he was concentrating hard on his work, holding the whip in two hands and about ready to use it again. He looked so sexy standing there nude and turned on and I bit my lip thinking of what it would be like for him to make love to me again.
Jimmy noticed my eyes on him and he whipped me again, it stung this time. He then hastily set it down and picked up something else,” You’re not to look at me.” A black cloth was placed over my eyes and tied behind my head like a blindfold. I was mortified, I couldn’t see a thing! But I didn’t have much time to react as the whip again hit my skin and I yelped even louder for the surprise. Jimmy seemed to enjoy this even more and left out a groan, whipping me again. He continued this a few more minutes until I thought the tears would escape my eyes; it wasn’t that he was hurting me, but the entire idea of him standing there taking pride in my pain was too much for me; and I was even more shocked to find that I was as stimulated as he was by it. It was so different from anything I had ever experienced and I wanted to be under his control. I didn’t care, my lust overpowered all, and I wanted him to do with me as he would.
A second later I heard the whip hit the floor and relief set in. Jimmy’s lips touched my injuring skin and I wondered if it was now safe for me to turn around. I thought better for it and only waited for his signal. He rolled me over swiftly and I felt him straddle me and his hardness press against my stomach. I wanted to arch my back and let him in, but first I went for the blindfold and tried to get it off.
“Don’t take it off,” Jimmy commanded hoarsely. His breath was coming faster and faster. I laid my hands at my sides, again feeling fright as he ever so carefully took my body towards his and entered me. I was breathless for fulfillment and he knew it so he took all the time he wanted. When he was finally completely inside me, I put my legs around him roughly and we pulled together, my fingers racking into his back till I thought they’d leave marks and his arms holding me to him. I could only hear his moans and my name come from him, but I couldn’t see him and this made it all the more erotic. I began to feel him and let noise break out of my mouth but I felt a hand clasp over me as Jimmy kept moving his hips in motion with mine, “Don’t.” I shut my mouth tight and held the sounds in till I thought I might explode but only let Jimmy express his own rapture; knowing I was pleasing him so did however have its benefits and I felt like a goddess.
When we finally reached our peak, Jimmy let out a loud groan and collapsed on top of me as I went flaccid under him. As his head lay in the crook of my neck, I slowly took my mask off and looked down at him. I loved the way men looked after sex, so pure and spent. Jimmy’s hair was spread across me in a sweaty heap and his eyes were closed; it was the first time I realized how tense he had been around me earlier and now he was so relaxed and I was proud of myself. I had really done something to this man that I didn’t understand. But I didn’t want to, it was too perfect.
Minutes passed before Jimmy lifted his head and looked into my eyes, his hair sticking to my skin. He ran his hand over my cheek kindly and kissed my lips sweetly. God, he had the perfect mouth! He stroked my cheek again as he spoke, “There’s something I want to tell you but I don’t think you’ll like it.”
“What is it?”
“I think I love you Jules.” He put his head back on my chest and breathed in my scent contentedly. It took a second for me to register what he said to me, but when I realized it I was appalled. I bought my hand to my mouth and tried to fight back the tears. How could I have been so stupid? How could I have done this to him? A sob came from me Jimmy sat up, “What’s wrong?”
“I’m so sorry Jimmy. I-“
“I know. I know we can never be anything more than this, I know you love Robert. I’ve thought about it a long time. But Juliet,” Jimmy explained. I looked away from him and he turned my face back to his, “Juliet, I can’t help it.”
“I love Robert…”
“I know you do, I realize that! I saw you down in the pool with him. I saw the two of you together and my heart ached. But it didn’t ache to be in his place, it only ached to have something like what the two of you have. I see you together every day and it makes me jealous. I’ve got groupies sure, but I don’t have anything like you and Percy have together. The two of you are going to grow old together and have children, while I’ll be back here fucking some stupid teenager who barely knows my name!”
“Don’t say that…”
“It’s true! But maybe, just maybe I’ll be able to find something like what you have. I hope so.”
I brought Jimmy to my chest and hugged him, “You will sweetie, you will. You’re too special for a girl to just pass you by.”
Jimmy lifted his head and looked at me with a smile then, “Do you have a sister?”
I laughed a little, “No.”
“Bollocks.” We laughed together as we continued to lie together.
Jimmy stood up after a few minutes and went to the window, “Come look at this.”
I got up and stood behind him to look out the window. Robert and Bonzo were outside still by the pool, now singing songs incoherently and getting drunk off the champagne. I giggled and walked back to the bed, “And I married that man!” I lay on my side and Jimmy came to the other side of the bed and lay on his side parallel to me, playing with my hair, “And what are we?”
“Lovers, friends with benefits, soul mates,” Jimmy replied in a whimsical voice.
“How about absolutely crazy?” I added.
“That too,” he said with a smile. He kissed me for perhaps the hundredth time that evening and I was in heaven again. None of it mattered, when I was with him time stopped. For now if I could give him just a piece of me to make him happy, I would. I dropped onto my back as he climbed on top of me again and we made love. And this time, no whips were required.