Comments | srs_bidness: business ventures, vanity labels, and dat azz

srs_bidness

business ventures, vanity labels, and dat azz

Dec 05, 2008 06:50

OK, so I'll level with you. I was going to take my bye this week because the Rev, who you may recall promised to rejoin the campaign in Week 10 if I managed to survive Week 9, has disappeared without a trace. There are rumors floating around that he's just off "servicing" Rick Wagoner while he's in town, but one way or the other, he's not picking ( Read more... )

Comments 15

thenodrin December 5 2008, 18:43:02 UTC

How did you know that I didn't fit in your jeans? This is about me, letting myself go, isn't it? I plan to change. I refuse to buy a 40 inch waist pair of pants!

Oh, wait. You only sell women's jeans? That's not about me at all.

Unless ... how did you know that I once tried to put on my (now ex) wife's jeans by mistake? It was an honest mistake. I was a slim 30 waist at the time, and we both had a pair of Levis 505s. They looked alike until they were tight against my thighs, causing me to fall down. My poor wife was unable to help me because she couldn't breathe and was stuck in the bedroom door, laughing at me flopping on the bedroom floor like a merman.

The sad thing? All of that is true except for me thinking your post is about me.

Great as always, Srs.

Theno

srs_bidness December 6 2008, 06:25:02 UTC

If I had been in the business of making mens' jeans, rest assured that they would come in a wide range of sizes in order to accommodate those of us, like yourself and myself, who have let ourselves go a bit, have genetic issues, etc. After all, if you can't keep brutally unfair double standards alive in the world of fashion, well, damn... where can you?

Maybe this is just retribution talking. I'm always pissed that women have a much better selection of shoes.

welfy December 5 2008, 22:28:59 UTC

I think I just scared the cat with my mixture of snorting and laughing. I better buy me some of those jeans! Will you plan on making any other products, particularly Cute Tiny Shirts? (they're the bane of my husband's existence)

superhappytime December 6 2008, 02:17:50 UTC

suck up!

srs_bidness December 6 2008, 06:30:45 UTC

If I ever get a seven-figure line of venture capital again (seems unlikely, since in the current market I presently can't even get financing on that dishwasher I had my eye on at Home Depot), I will eschew the human fashion market entirely in favor of a new line of cat sweaters.

Don't be misled; I'm positioning myself upmarket. The cat-sweater market has not done a good job of catering to the particularly discerning and cynical hipster cat. You won't be able to go into a cat coffeehouse without seeing my sweaters on a bunch of disaffected, hornrimmed mid-20s cats while Godspeed You Black Emperor! plays on the stereo.

srs_bidness December 6 2008, 06:32:48 UTC

You can tell you're getting older and more irrelevant when, while typing out Godspeed You! Black Emperor, you put the exclamation point in the wrong place.

theafaye December 5 2008, 22:53:04 UTC

Thank you, srs, for making me laugh. Much appreciated.

Do I owe you money for that??

srs_bidness December 6 2008, 06:20:47 UTC

Yes. No worries, I'll send you my Paypal address in a second.

brightflashes December 6 2008, 00:35:16 UTC

You're just too good. I *knew* that you'd be able to write a brilliant entry this week given the topic but to go this direction? heh. Great job for keeping me on my toes and great job for being such an amazing writer. : )

srs_bidness December 6 2008, 06:33:54 UTC

Thanks, yo. Here's my secret: It always helps to be perennially drunk.

superhappytime December 6 2008, 02:19:59 UTC

In your former line of work, I'm sure you spent some time in Oklahoma. I once drove there just to cross it off on my list of 50 states to visit. I never went farther than Durant, which is about 10 miles over the Red River on US-75 or whatever. I've met some people from Oklahoma, and while some are normal and nice, there are a lot who redefine hick. Not as many as say, Arkansas, but a lot. I mean...noodlin'? What the fuck?

srs_bidness December 6 2008, 06:34:16 UTC

Boomer sooner, friend. Boomer fuckin' sooner.

superhappytime December 6 2008, 06:47:08 UTC

someone said that at work today to person from there...and then called her a yankee, which I thought was hilarious. that was right before the boss pointed out that she didn't even go to OU, and is actually a UTA (University of Texas-Arlington) grad, and said "what does that stand for again...UT Almost?" Again, hilarious. Or maybe I'm just easy.