(no subject)
Title - I'm sorry. (We're blocked by dusty window glass)
Author - stare_at_walls
Characters - Jensen Ackles & Jared Padalecki. Jared & Sandy Mcoy
Rating - R-18?
Disclaimer - Not mine. DUH. Fic wouldn't exist if i owned them.
Summary - Jared spends Christmas with Sandy at Texas, and his heart's breaking too.
Notes - Part of the Heartbroken series. Jared P.O.V. 1st part, 2nd part (Jared POV). This is the third part. Also, playlist found here.
Warnings - ANGST! ANGST! ANGST! And also, some schmoop? Het sex, yes. :D
Jared recalls that moment in the trailer.
His heart beat so fast, and he knew he had to prove, at least to himself, that it was all just a mistake. That Jensen was just drunk, and what he said that night wasn’t real. Jared remembers Jensen’s soft lips, the way it curved as he confessed to Jared. The way it felt against his own.
His heart’s still beating, breath catching every second or so.
oOo
Four hours is a really long time to wait. See, Jared had been waiting for just that long, or more actually. Whatever, he wasn’t really counting. The lady at the desk told him that his flight was rescheduled to leave at somewhere around 7:30.
Well, since Jared had been there since 4:30 am with a very nasty headache, it was a wonder he hadn’t either a.) passed out, or b.) thrown a hissy fit. (Which he rarely did. Honestly.)
6 am comes, and Jared’s really itching to move.
“Shit!” Jared says quite audibly as he drops his cell phone, startling a little girl beside him. The girl’s mother looks at him disapprovingly and moves to a farther seat.
“Sorry.” Jared said sheepishly, trying to smile a little.
But the thing is, he can’t fucking bring himself to really smile.
oOo
Walking around the airport, still buzzed, Jared couldn’t stop thinking.
I love you.
He could hear Jensen’s voice, all raspy tired and needy. His hands were starting to shake, a blend of fatigue and nerves. Fuck.
He found himself in front of the candy store in the airport; his hands were still shaking like a windswept leaf. Jared tries to distract himself, sifting through bags of gummy worms and chocolate rocks.
But then he sees the inevitable.
“Jensen.”
He says it more like a statement than his intended question. His eyes lock on the figure of that man reflected in the glass case’s surface. It feels as if his heart grew claws and was now desperately trying to climb out of his throat. He can feel his heart’s heavy pounding, banging to some invisible rhythm, his thoughts of Jensen and what should he do and Sandy and I love you all dancing to that one irrepressible beat.
His body doesn’t give his brain time to decide. Suddenly he’s turning around and waving.
“Jensen!”
His stomach does flip-flops and he falters, realizing that maybe Jensen doesn’t want to talk to him.
His breathing catches again, asking himself if Jensen will actually look at him.
Jensen hardly even glances at him, but he thinks he saw Jensen flinch a little.
Jared tries not to read into what he just did. Men don’t do that.
But he still does though.
oOo
As the plane hums for lift-off, Jared looks outside his window- dusty with sunlight filtering in - and he draws a heart again. His eyes look directly outside the window, sunlight dancing in his irises, his thoughts with only one person.
Even if his thoughts weren’t supposed to go that way.
oOo
“Wake up sir.” A stewardess with heavily bleached teeth purred sultrily. “Eh. What?” Jared answered.
“Sir, the flight has landed, you should be getting off the plane now.” She said, adjusting her silicone breasts. In front of Jared. Visibly.
“Oh, right.” Jared said this, voice a little shaky as he stood up and took his backpack.
The stewardess laughs, one injected with pure lust, and Jared quickens his speed just a little more.
As he clambers down the steps to the ground, Jared sees Sandy waving at him. Eyes crinkling at the edges with laughter. He smiles back, something sinking inside him as he does.
He walks over to Sandy, and then-
“Baby! How was your trip?” Sandy coos.
“Fine.” Jared mumbles, his hands fumbling with the ends of his polo.
“Why didn’t you tell me it was going to be rescheduled, hmm?” Sandy plays with the ends of Jared’s hair, smiling sweetly. “I-” and there’s a pause, full of broken promises and unwanted confessions. Maybe something near to: I think I’m in love with my best friend.
“I kinda didn’t know it myself.” Jared says, answering her question and adding to this hidden confession.
Sandy opens her mouth to say something, but Jared cuts her with a-
“I’m really tired Sandy.” Another awkward pause. “Let’s go get my luggage then get on home. I’ll talk to you later, ‘kay?”
Sandy looks a little puzzled, and a little ticked. She looks Jared in the eyes, takes a chip of her nail, and she smiles. “All right hon. Let’s talk later then.” and she gives him a little kiss on the cheek, then walks off, trailing the words:
“Let’s go get your stuff then.”
Jared’s torn between being surprised and not surprised that his heart’s not doing the twisting, flying, dropping thing it used to do whenever he was with Sandy.
oOo
It’s Christmas in Texas, and it’s actually a little weird.
Actually, Christmas Eve in Texas.
Jared hasn’t been to Texas again since god-knows-the-fuck-when, but he adjusts just right.
“Jay!” His momma half-shrieks as she sees him walking across the front porch. Jared gives a little smile and gets enveloped in her hug.
Sandy walks up the steps and smiles.
Her brown hair glistens in the sunlight, there’s a bounce in her step that Jared doesn’t ever want to disappear from her.
“Ma.” Jared begins. “This-” he falters, “This is Sandy.”
“Oh.” Jared’s mom smiles affably.
“Welcome to our little house, hope you find it home.” She says, taking Sandy’s hands in hers, and Jared just smiles.
oOo
“Here’s your room” Jared’s mother leads Sandy to the guestroom.
There’s a little tension clouding the air, and his mother breaks it with a chuckle and an, “Okay, I’m gonna leave you two lovebirds now and get to finishing that meal.” As she wipes her hands on her aprons and calls to the help they’ve got to fix dinner.
Jared helps Sandy unpack, listening to her little stories of what happened to her in L.A., laughing at all the right moments, and smiling appropriately. Sandy stops mid-sentence, something about what happened to her and her friends at some pool place and asks him-
“Is something wrong honey?”
Her eyes are laced with worry and tension, and her hands- small and soft and tanned just right- reach for Jared’s face, fingertips translating her emotions as it traces his jaw line. “Anything I can do?” She says, holding his gaze.
Jared tries desperately not to drown and give out. Everything here’s just a parade of maybes and probablys. Maybe he loves Jensen. It’s probable that he wants to pull Sandy in and not make her cry- especially from what he’s doing.
He clears his throat and automatically cups Sandy’s hand in his. “No, Im-” he looks at any part of Sandy’s face that’s not her eyes “I’m fine.” And he smiles, on cue.
Sandy sighs, and continues unpacking and chattering.
oOo
After Christmas eve dinner (Sandy being introduced to his sister, his father, to any visitor and relative who came by that evening.) They wish each other a “Merry Christmas” and go to their rooms to sleep.
He pecks Sandy on the cheek, catches her smile and reflects it. “G’night sweetie” Sandy whispers to his ear as they go to their own rooms, and his mom and dad chat a little more with Sandy.
oOo
Midnight finds him staring at the ceiling of his old room, head resting in between his hands, chest breathing to the evening’s rhythm.
Jared thinks about life before Jensen, before Supernatural, but all he can think of is the smiles they’ve shared, the pranks they’ve done, the times they’ve had together.
The brief touches they share in every hug or so.
I love you.
Jared feels a lot guilty about this. He’s only realizing this now, but Jensen’s become a part of him he doesn’t think he can ever stand to lose.
Jared stands up, his bed creaking from the lightened weight, and opens his door slowly.
oOo
Jared sneaks into Sandy’s room, and lies beside her.
Sandy’s still awake apparently, as she wraps an arm around him, humming contentedly, whispering “I love you” to Jared’s ears, her breath wafting the hair on his nape.
Jared’s thoughts fly to how Jensen feels beside him, heat moving between them.
Jared leans over and kisses Sandy with an intensity that he hopes will drive away any and all thoughts of Jensen.
As Jared plants kisses all over Sandy’s back, unhooking her bra, his mind’s still thinking of Jensen. How he’d want to wake up beside Jen, connect the dots his freckles make.
That night, Jared fucks Sandy violently; each thrust a plea to fall back in love with her.
He thinks that in between his thrusts and her stifled moans that Sandy doesn’t notice him, but she does. She sees the faraway look in his eyes, the painful groans he makes as he closes his eyes, the shudder and sigh he makes as he comes- she knows it’s not for her anymore.
She hopes that she’s wrong.
oOo
After Sandy falls asleep in his arms, Jared slowly untangles himself from her, walks out the door. Sandy wakes up though, sees him leave, feels her heart break into innumerable pieces.
oOo
It’s early Christmas morning, and he reaches for his cellphone. He doesn’t know what he’s doing, but he calls Jensen.
He’s part hoping he doesn’t answer, that he’s not home and part hoping that he’d hear his voice again. The answering machine takes his call, and Jared can almost feel Jensen’s presence beside him as he breathes quietly into the receiver, eyes closed and heart longing.
oOo
After breakfast (they’re leaving early) Jared and Sandy say goodbye to the parents and to Megan. Jared calls the airport to ask about the flight they’re supposed to take (because he’s obsessive compulsive like that) and he’s told that mechanical failure has their 8 am flight moved to an indefinite time. Just as Jared and Sandy are about to ask for another plane, Jared’s mom tells them to “rest awhile here, then you can leave perhaps later on?”
And before he knows it, Sandy’s saying “I’d love to!” her eyes radiating joy at the fact that she and the parents are getting along, as she sits down and talks to Megan in the living room, leaving Jared alone on the porch.
oOo
At 10 am, Jared tries to call Jensen again.
He’s surprised to actually hear Jensen. At this, Jared’s voice catches, his fingertips itch.
I love you.
The thought threatens to spill out of his mouth.
He hears Jensen say his name. He knows it’s him after all.
He gathers courage to say his name, breathing deeply then-
“Jensen.”
He finally says it. Jared’s nervous, unsure of what he’s doing. He asks himself what the fuck was I thinking?
He thinks the best move is to say what might possibly be there.
“Jen, I-” He gets cut off with a snarl from the other line, “Yeah, what?” voice dripping ferocity.
He meant to say that maybe he does feel something for Jensen.
He says he’s sorry instead. Sorry for what, he has no idea. Sorry for this mess, for maybe hurting him? Just sorry.
The second it takes for Jensen to say his reply feels like an eternity to Jared, and when Jensen deadpans him with a “Yeah, so am I”, irritation so obvious he could’ve just slapped Jared in the face instead, Jared feels like he’s going to faint, like his breath’s going to disappear and he’s going to end up dead.
But he doesn’t die. Instead he says-
“I love you Jensen.” And, being surprised at what he just said, he utters “Shit.”
He’s not sure what’s happening, but everything takes a nasty turn.
Seconds later, he can hear Jensen screaming at him, telling him to fuck off and all that-
Until he hears the phone being slammed down hard.
Jared presses on the red button on his phone to drop the call.
As he runs his fingers through his hair, he doesn’t see Sandy standing behind him, wiping the tears on the sleeve of her blouse, her eyes saying I should’ve known.
oOo
They get to leave at 11 am.
Sandy says goodbye to all the parents and there’s a strained connection between her and Jared. They don’t talk to each other on the way to the airport, silence permeates every other half-hearted sentence they attempt to use for a conversation, and it’s awkward.
As they get to L.A., Sandy tells him to go somewhere else, and Jared’s surprised. He asks her “What!?” a single question containing all questions. Are you cheating on me? What’s going on? Are we breaking up? Is there something wrong?
Sandy’s got her back turned on him as she’s fixing her stuff. Jared walks around her to see her face. “What’s going on?” He asks, until he realizes that she’s crying, sniffling pathetically and gasping for breath.
“You think I don’t know?” she asks, her voice angry and mournful.
Jared opens his mouth to ask what she’s talking about, but she cuts him off, saying “I heard your phone call to him. To Jensen.”
And there it is. One sentence saying everything needed to be said, and Jared can’t believe this is happening. She’s crying and he’s near to it and this is just so fucking fucked up.
“You told me” she began, “you wouldn’t hurt me.” Jared tries to touch her face but she moves back and continues “What you don’t know” catching her own breath, “is that you’ve hurt me more than they could ever have.”
“I love you Jared.” Her voice comes out as a whimper, helpless and she’s trying to get herself together.
Jared can’t do anything but just stand and look.
“You know what?” She finally says, “we’re over.” And her voice is pure anger.
“Go fuck each other then, like the faggots that you are.” Sandy snarls, though it’s obvious by the crack in her voice that she’s just hurt, that she put too much on this bet and she’s lost everything.
“I’m sorry.” Is all Jared can say. Because, what else can he say?
Sandy walks out of the airport clutching her bags and herself, trying not to fall apart.
oOo
After Jared gets home (the dogs are with Chad) He wanders around L.A. The sad part is, he sees lovers everywhere.
And that just sucks.
At midnight, after more than a few drinks, he decides to go to Jensen.
The walk to Jensen’s apartment is quiet, warm air enveloping him like a hug.
I love you.
oOo
Finally, Jared gets to Jensen’s apartment.
As he stands in front of the door, he knocks, unsure of what to do still.
There’s no answer.
But he knows that Jensen’s inside.
He just knows.
He knocks again.
Silence.
I love you
The thought dances along with his heart’s drumbeat.
I love you
And as his heart increases tempo, he rests his hands on the knob, turns it.
The door opens.
4th Part (Final): Heartbreak Shatters like broken glass
Author - stare_at_walls
Characters - Jensen Ackles & Jared Padalecki. Jared & Sandy Mcoy
Rating - R-18?
Disclaimer - Not mine. DUH. Fic wouldn't exist if i owned them.
Summary - Jared spends Christmas with Sandy at Texas, and his heart's breaking too.
Notes - Part of the Heartbroken series. Jared P.O.V. 1st part, 2nd part (Jared POV). This is the third part. Also, playlist found here.
Warnings - ANGST! ANGST! ANGST! And also, some schmoop? Het sex, yes. :D
Jared recalls that moment in the trailer.
His heart beat so fast, and he knew he had to prove, at least to himself, that it was all just a mistake. That Jensen was just drunk, and what he said that night wasn’t real. Jared remembers Jensen’s soft lips, the way it curved as he confessed to Jared. The way it felt against his own.
His heart’s still beating, breath catching every second or so.
oOo
Four hours is a really long time to wait. See, Jared had been waiting for just that long, or more actually. Whatever, he wasn’t really counting. The lady at the desk told him that his flight was rescheduled to leave at somewhere around 7:30.
Well, since Jared had been there since 4:30 am with a very nasty headache, it was a wonder he hadn’t either a.) passed out, or b.) thrown a hissy fit. (Which he rarely did. Honestly.)
6 am comes, and Jared’s really itching to move.
“Shit!” Jared says quite audibly as he drops his cell phone, startling a little girl beside him. The girl’s mother looks at him disapprovingly and moves to a farther seat.
“Sorry.” Jared said sheepishly, trying to smile a little.
But the thing is, he can’t fucking bring himself to really smile.
oOo
Walking around the airport, still buzzed, Jared couldn’t stop thinking.
I love you.
He could hear Jensen’s voice, all raspy tired and needy. His hands were starting to shake, a blend of fatigue and nerves. Fuck.
He found himself in front of the candy store in the airport; his hands were still shaking like a windswept leaf. Jared tries to distract himself, sifting through bags of gummy worms and chocolate rocks.
But then he sees the inevitable.
“Jensen.”
He says it more like a statement than his intended question. His eyes lock on the figure of that man reflected in the glass case’s surface. It feels as if his heart grew claws and was now desperately trying to climb out of his throat. He can feel his heart’s heavy pounding, banging to some invisible rhythm, his thoughts of Jensen and what should he do and Sandy and I love you all dancing to that one irrepressible beat.
His body doesn’t give his brain time to decide. Suddenly he’s turning around and waving.
“Jensen!”
His stomach does flip-flops and he falters, realizing that maybe Jensen doesn’t want to talk to him.
His breathing catches again, asking himself if Jensen will actually look at him.
Jensen hardly even glances at him, but he thinks he saw Jensen flinch a little.
Jared tries not to read into what he just did. Men don’t do that.
But he still does though.
oOo
As the plane hums for lift-off, Jared looks outside his window- dusty with sunlight filtering in - and he draws a heart again. His eyes look directly outside the window, sunlight dancing in his irises, his thoughts with only one person.
Even if his thoughts weren’t supposed to go that way.
oOo
“Wake up sir.” A stewardess with heavily bleached teeth purred sultrily. “Eh. What?” Jared answered.
“Sir, the flight has landed, you should be getting off the plane now.” She said, adjusting her silicone breasts. In front of Jared. Visibly.
“Oh, right.” Jared said this, voice a little shaky as he stood up and took his backpack.
The stewardess laughs, one injected with pure lust, and Jared quickens his speed just a little more.
As he clambers down the steps to the ground, Jared sees Sandy waving at him. Eyes crinkling at the edges with laughter. He smiles back, something sinking inside him as he does.
He walks over to Sandy, and then-
“Baby! How was your trip?” Sandy coos.
“Fine.” Jared mumbles, his hands fumbling with the ends of his polo.
“Why didn’t you tell me it was going to be rescheduled, hmm?” Sandy plays with the ends of Jared’s hair, smiling sweetly. “I-” and there’s a pause, full of broken promises and unwanted confessions. Maybe something near to: I think I’m in love with my best friend.
“I kinda didn’t know it myself.” Jared says, answering her question and adding to this hidden confession.
Sandy opens her mouth to say something, but Jared cuts her with a-
“I’m really tired Sandy.” Another awkward pause. “Let’s go get my luggage then get on home. I’ll talk to you later, ‘kay?”
Sandy looks a little puzzled, and a little ticked. She looks Jared in the eyes, takes a chip of her nail, and she smiles. “All right hon. Let’s talk later then.” and she gives him a little kiss on the cheek, then walks off, trailing the words:
“Let’s go get your stuff then.”
Jared’s torn between being surprised and not surprised that his heart’s not doing the twisting, flying, dropping thing it used to do whenever he was with Sandy.
oOo
It’s Christmas in Texas, and it’s actually a little weird.
Actually, Christmas Eve in Texas.
Jared hasn’t been to Texas again since god-knows-the-fuck-when, but he adjusts just right.
“Jay!” His momma half-shrieks as she sees him walking across the front porch. Jared gives a little smile and gets enveloped in her hug.
Sandy walks up the steps and smiles.
Her brown hair glistens in the sunlight, there’s a bounce in her step that Jared doesn’t ever want to disappear from her.
“Ma.” Jared begins. “This-” he falters, “This is Sandy.”
“Oh.” Jared’s mom smiles affably.
“Welcome to our little house, hope you find it home.” She says, taking Sandy’s hands in hers, and Jared just smiles.
oOo
“Here’s your room” Jared’s mother leads Sandy to the guestroom.
There’s a little tension clouding the air, and his mother breaks it with a chuckle and an, “Okay, I’m gonna leave you two lovebirds now and get to finishing that meal.” As she wipes her hands on her aprons and calls to the help they’ve got to fix dinner.
Jared helps Sandy unpack, listening to her little stories of what happened to her in L.A., laughing at all the right moments, and smiling appropriately. Sandy stops mid-sentence, something about what happened to her and her friends at some pool place and asks him-
“Is something wrong honey?”
Her eyes are laced with worry and tension, and her hands- small and soft and tanned just right- reach for Jared’s face, fingertips translating her emotions as it traces his jaw line. “Anything I can do?” She says, holding his gaze.
Jared tries desperately not to drown and give out. Everything here’s just a parade of maybes and probablys. Maybe he loves Jensen. It’s probable that he wants to pull Sandy in and not make her cry- especially from what he’s doing.
He clears his throat and automatically cups Sandy’s hand in his. “No, Im-” he looks at any part of Sandy’s face that’s not her eyes “I’m fine.” And he smiles, on cue.
Sandy sighs, and continues unpacking and chattering.
oOo
After Christmas eve dinner (Sandy being introduced to his sister, his father, to any visitor and relative who came by that evening.) They wish each other a “Merry Christmas” and go to their rooms to sleep.
He pecks Sandy on the cheek, catches her smile and reflects it. “G’night sweetie” Sandy whispers to his ear as they go to their own rooms, and his mom and dad chat a little more with Sandy.
oOo
Midnight finds him staring at the ceiling of his old room, head resting in between his hands, chest breathing to the evening’s rhythm.
Jared thinks about life before Jensen, before Supernatural, but all he can think of is the smiles they’ve shared, the pranks they’ve done, the times they’ve had together.
The brief touches they share in every hug or so.
I love you.
Jared feels a lot guilty about this. He’s only realizing this now, but Jensen’s become a part of him he doesn’t think he can ever stand to lose.
Jared stands up, his bed creaking from the lightened weight, and opens his door slowly.
oOo
Jared sneaks into Sandy’s room, and lies beside her.
Sandy’s still awake apparently, as she wraps an arm around him, humming contentedly, whispering “I love you” to Jared’s ears, her breath wafting the hair on his nape.
Jared’s thoughts fly to how Jensen feels beside him, heat moving between them.
Jared leans over and kisses Sandy with an intensity that he hopes will drive away any and all thoughts of Jensen.
As Jared plants kisses all over Sandy’s back, unhooking her bra, his mind’s still thinking of Jensen. How he’d want to wake up beside Jen, connect the dots his freckles make.
That night, Jared fucks Sandy violently; each thrust a plea to fall back in love with her.
He thinks that in between his thrusts and her stifled moans that Sandy doesn’t notice him, but she does. She sees the faraway look in his eyes, the painful groans he makes as he closes his eyes, the shudder and sigh he makes as he comes- she knows it’s not for her anymore.
She hopes that she’s wrong.
oOo
After Sandy falls asleep in his arms, Jared slowly untangles himself from her, walks out the door. Sandy wakes up though, sees him leave, feels her heart break into innumerable pieces.
oOo
It’s early Christmas morning, and he reaches for his cellphone. He doesn’t know what he’s doing, but he calls Jensen.
He’s part hoping he doesn’t answer, that he’s not home and part hoping that he’d hear his voice again. The answering machine takes his call, and Jared can almost feel Jensen’s presence beside him as he breathes quietly into the receiver, eyes closed and heart longing.
oOo
After breakfast (they’re leaving early) Jared and Sandy say goodbye to the parents and to Megan. Jared calls the airport to ask about the flight they’re supposed to take (because he’s obsessive compulsive like that) and he’s told that mechanical failure has their 8 am flight moved to an indefinite time. Just as Jared and Sandy are about to ask for another plane, Jared’s mom tells them to “rest awhile here, then you can leave perhaps later on?”
And before he knows it, Sandy’s saying “I’d love to!” her eyes radiating joy at the fact that she and the parents are getting along, as she sits down and talks to Megan in the living room, leaving Jared alone on the porch.
oOo
At 10 am, Jared tries to call Jensen again.
He’s surprised to actually hear Jensen. At this, Jared’s voice catches, his fingertips itch.
I love you.
The thought threatens to spill out of his mouth.
He hears Jensen say his name. He knows it’s him after all.
He gathers courage to say his name, breathing deeply then-
“Jensen.”
He finally says it. Jared’s nervous, unsure of what he’s doing. He asks himself what the fuck was I thinking?
He thinks the best move is to say what might possibly be there.
“Jen, I-” He gets cut off with a snarl from the other line, “Yeah, what?” voice dripping ferocity.
He meant to say that maybe he does feel something for Jensen.
He says he’s sorry instead. Sorry for what, he has no idea. Sorry for this mess, for maybe hurting him? Just sorry.
The second it takes for Jensen to say his reply feels like an eternity to Jared, and when Jensen deadpans him with a “Yeah, so am I”, irritation so obvious he could’ve just slapped Jared in the face instead, Jared feels like he’s going to faint, like his breath’s going to disappear and he’s going to end up dead.
But he doesn’t die. Instead he says-
“I love you Jensen.” And, being surprised at what he just said, he utters “Shit.”
He’s not sure what’s happening, but everything takes a nasty turn.
Seconds later, he can hear Jensen screaming at him, telling him to fuck off and all that-
Until he hears the phone being slammed down hard.
Jared presses on the red button on his phone to drop the call.
As he runs his fingers through his hair, he doesn’t see Sandy standing behind him, wiping the tears on the sleeve of her blouse, her eyes saying I should’ve known.
oOo
They get to leave at 11 am.
Sandy says goodbye to all the parents and there’s a strained connection between her and Jared. They don’t talk to each other on the way to the airport, silence permeates every other half-hearted sentence they attempt to use for a conversation, and it’s awkward.
As they get to L.A., Sandy tells him to go somewhere else, and Jared’s surprised. He asks her “What!?” a single question containing all questions. Are you cheating on me? What’s going on? Are we breaking up? Is there something wrong?
Sandy’s got her back turned on him as she’s fixing her stuff. Jared walks around her to see her face. “What’s going on?” He asks, until he realizes that she’s crying, sniffling pathetically and gasping for breath.
“You think I don’t know?” she asks, her voice angry and mournful.
Jared opens his mouth to ask what she’s talking about, but she cuts him off, saying “I heard your phone call to him. To Jensen.”
And there it is. One sentence saying everything needed to be said, and Jared can’t believe this is happening. She’s crying and he’s near to it and this is just so fucking fucked up.
“You told me” she began, “you wouldn’t hurt me.” Jared tries to touch her face but she moves back and continues “What you don’t know” catching her own breath, “is that you’ve hurt me more than they could ever have.”
“I love you Jared.” Her voice comes out as a whimper, helpless and she’s trying to get herself together.
Jared can’t do anything but just stand and look.
“You know what?” She finally says, “we’re over.” And her voice is pure anger.
“Go fuck each other then, like the faggots that you are.” Sandy snarls, though it’s obvious by the crack in her voice that she’s just hurt, that she put too much on this bet and she’s lost everything.
“I’m sorry.” Is all Jared can say. Because, what else can he say?
Sandy walks out of the airport clutching her bags and herself, trying not to fall apart.
oOo
After Jared gets home (the dogs are with Chad) He wanders around L.A. The sad part is, he sees lovers everywhere.
And that just sucks.
At midnight, after more than a few drinks, he decides to go to Jensen.
The walk to Jensen’s apartment is quiet, warm air enveloping him like a hug.
I love you.
oOo
Finally, Jared gets to Jensen’s apartment.
As he stands in front of the door, he knocks, unsure of what to do still.
There’s no answer.
But he knows that Jensen’s inside.
He just knows.
He knocks again.
Silence.
I love you
The thought dances along with his heart’s drumbeat.
I love you
And as his heart increases tempo, he rests his hands on the knob, turns it.
The door opens.
4th Part (Final): Heartbreak Shatters like broken glass