(no subject)
☣in sequence.
G | FEB 14 | 1139
The palpitations of a twisted heart keep on growing & growing, thump thump thumping like it's the end of the world, the end of line, the end of this beat & melody I'd like to call you & I. Gokudera has never seen the streetlights look so imposing, as if it's about to swallow him whole & alive, in one piece & maybe in pieces, but that doesn't sound so bad right now. Cigarette smoke & cherry filtered ash coat the night's air as he breathes in & out rhythmically, feeling the rush of nicotine on his tongue. It tastes like home, of the lack of dying wills & the Vongola's Tenth Gen., of his father & that damn piano with an out of tune high G, of all the liestruths that told him he's worth just as much as yesterday's news. $0.51 & maybe even none.
Nobody wants to have what they already saw, nobody wants to have something that's so raw & used & useless -- this, he knows. This, he lives with every day & night, every night & day, every time his eyes close & open to greet a brand new hour, brand new week, same old routine, same old days. It's like a cocktail made for self-pity, self-doubt, & everything in between, but he'd have none of that -- wouldn't drink it even if you say it's for him & him alone, 'cause the world doesn't need another loser. & he doesn't want to be one, either, 'cause what kind of right hand man would he be then?
There's a pause in his tracks & he's blowing out smoke quietly, the cancer stick slowly dying, but his lips keep it alive. No good, no good; it used to belong to a boy who never looks up 'cause he has nothing to look forward to, a boy who never looks at you 'cause he never has anything brilliant to say, a boy who's short of being amazing until something unexpected came around & started talking about bullets with special powers, the kind that grants you anything you wish for, as long as in death, you have only one thing in mind, & that's regret & nothing more. A will to do the impossible, to go against the odds, & reach for the stars 'cause you'll get nowhere if you stay grounded.
A lesson learned through tough love.
But the Tenth, Gokudera thinks, fingers dropping the now useless cigarette to kiss the concrete & meet its fate by the tip of his shoe, the Tenth is an amazing person. Like the sky above, limitless, passionate, always blue yet so vibrant, never dies, never goes away, always there, always constant, someone you could count on, someone that'd never leave, & someone that'd accept the you that is you & not the me that isn't me. & this, he continues on, with a smile on his face, the kind that's rare to see, is all I really need.
But then, there's another pause, & he's got a black mobile on one hand a second later, fingers flipping it open out of habit. There's a message, Can you come over? & Gokudera's looking at who it came from & kind of doubles over. From the Tenth? & there's no hesitation. Whenever the Tenth needs him, he's there, in a split-second, in a heartbeat. No explanations needed, no questions asked. There's always a time for those later, even though that time rarely ever comes, but Gokudera doesn't mind, never minds. If it's the Tenth, he'd do anything -- swim across the Atlantic Ocean, move a mountain, manipulate the stars & maybe even find a way to build him the robot he always wanted to have.
Someday, someday.
& it's this exact submission, this willingness to do anything & everything, that freaks Tsuna out a little, 'cause this -- he doesn't deserve something like this. All he really is, is just your typical boy next door, nothing special, nothing extraordinary. He lives & breathes & struggles to get by like the next person, with his head hung low, shoulders slumped, & eyes never looking up. A regular boy, with a title shoved on him like a ton of bricks with no return address ( he doesn't want it, doesn't want it, doesn't want it, but no one ever listens to the boy next door, right? ), & he can't help but feel a little overwhelmed sometimes.
'cause all he really wants to do, is live. Just live. Live life like he's supposed to, like regular boys with no names are supposed to. Not like this. Not with flames of dying wills & bullets that trigger him to regret things he'll never ever get to do, things he'll never ever get to say--
Sometimes he dreams of a time where it used to be him against everyone else. No good Tsuna versus the rest of the world. He flinches & looks down & does whatever they want him to do, 'cause that's what no good Tsuna's do. But now's a different tune, a different story, 'cause now it's not just him alone, but his friends & himself against everyone else. Friends? ( Friends. ) It feels weird as he rolls it around on the tip of his tongue, 'cause he's never had friends before any of this & he's not used to it yet. But it feels nice. Like a kind of warm feeling in your guts & it makes him smile.
"But friends," Tsuna whispers to himself, so he can hear it & believe, "friends are amazing like that. They could be like a hurricane of mass destruction, like the wind at your face, like the sand that coils around your feet, & like the sky above ( so limitless, passionate, always blue yet so vibrant -- ), but nothing can compare. They're all that & so much more & even beyond that. & this," there's a pause in his words, as he hears the doorbell ringing & the all too familiar voice calling out a name that isn't his, but still all about him.
"Tenth! Is something the matter?"
"N-no . . ."
"Then what's wrong, Tenth?"
"W-we got interrupted a while ago, so I-I was just wondering if you wanted to finish the watermelon you brought -- I mean, it's understandable if you don't want to & that's okay but I was just thinking it'd be nice & I mean you don't have to & --" The smile on Gokudera's face shuts him up & he's looking at him with most oblivious face, but then, he's smiling too.
"That'd be nice, Tenth. I'd like that."
& this, Tsuna thinks, as he lets Gokudera inside the house & as they both head for the kitchen, is all I really need.
title. In Sequence.
genre. Fluff.
rating. G.
characters. Gokudera Hayato, Sawada Tsunayoshi; Katekyo Hitman REBORN!
warnings. EXTREME SAP. I mean what. & also the lack of 'and' 'cause I got too lazy.
wordcount. 1139.
notes. For the Tenth/final. ♥ Belated Valentine's Day gift. ilu infinity x whatev u say.
disclaimer. Bodies, limbs, thoughts, &things aren't mine. I just pull the strings &stay on the sidelines, 'cause that's where the puppeteer belongs when her dolls are strutting all over the stage.
synopsis. It's all they really need.
G | FEB 14 | 1139
The palpitations of a twisted heart keep on growing & growing, thump thump thumping like it's the end of the world, the end of line, the end of this beat & melody I'd like to call you & I. Gokudera has never seen the streetlights look so imposing, as if it's about to swallow him whole & alive, in one piece & maybe in pieces, but that doesn't sound so bad right now. Cigarette smoke & cherry filtered ash coat the night's air as he breathes in & out rhythmically, feeling the rush of nicotine on his tongue. It tastes like home, of the lack of dying wills & the Vongola's Tenth Gen., of his father & that damn piano with an out of tune high G, of all the liestruths that told him he's worth just as much as yesterday's news. $0.51 & maybe even none.
Nobody wants to have what they already saw, nobody wants to have something that's so raw & used & useless -- this, he knows. This, he lives with every day & night, every night & day, every time his eyes close & open to greet a brand new hour, brand new week, same old routine, same old days. It's like a cocktail made for self-pity, self-doubt, & everything in between, but he'd have none of that -- wouldn't drink it even if you say it's for him & him alone, 'cause the world doesn't need another loser. & he doesn't want to be one, either, 'cause what kind of right hand man would he be then?
There's a pause in his tracks & he's blowing out smoke quietly, the cancer stick slowly dying, but his lips keep it alive. No good, no good; it used to belong to a boy who never looks up 'cause he has nothing to look forward to, a boy who never looks at you 'cause he never has anything brilliant to say, a boy who's short of being amazing until something unexpected came around & started talking about bullets with special powers, the kind that grants you anything you wish for, as long as in death, you have only one thing in mind, & that's regret & nothing more. A will to do the impossible, to go against the odds, & reach for the stars 'cause you'll get nowhere if you stay grounded.
A lesson learned through tough love.
But the Tenth, Gokudera thinks, fingers dropping the now useless cigarette to kiss the concrete & meet its fate by the tip of his shoe, the Tenth is an amazing person. Like the sky above, limitless, passionate, always blue yet so vibrant, never dies, never goes away, always there, always constant, someone you could count on, someone that'd never leave, & someone that'd accept the you that is you & not the me that isn't me. & this, he continues on, with a smile on his face, the kind that's rare to see, is all I really need.
But then, there's another pause, & he's got a black mobile on one hand a second later, fingers flipping it open out of habit. There's a message, Can you come over? & Gokudera's looking at who it came from & kind of doubles over. From the Tenth? & there's no hesitation. Whenever the Tenth needs him, he's there, in a split-second, in a heartbeat. No explanations needed, no questions asked. There's always a time for those later, even though that time rarely ever comes, but Gokudera doesn't mind, never minds. If it's the Tenth, he'd do anything -- swim across the Atlantic Ocean, move a mountain, manipulate the stars & maybe even find a way to build him the robot he always wanted to have.
Someday, someday.
& it's this exact submission, this willingness to do anything & everything, that freaks Tsuna out a little, 'cause this -- he doesn't deserve something like this. All he really is, is just your typical boy next door, nothing special, nothing extraordinary. He lives & breathes & struggles to get by like the next person, with his head hung low, shoulders slumped, & eyes never looking up. A regular boy, with a title shoved on him like a ton of bricks with no return address ( he doesn't want it, doesn't want it, doesn't want it, but no one ever listens to the boy next door, right? ), & he can't help but feel a little overwhelmed sometimes.
'cause all he really wants to do, is live. Just live. Live life like he's supposed to, like regular boys with no names are supposed to. Not like this. Not with flames of dying wills & bullets that trigger him to regret things he'll never ever get to do, things he'll never ever get to say--
Sometimes he dreams of a time where it used to be him against everyone else. No good Tsuna versus the rest of the world. He flinches & looks down & does whatever they want him to do, 'cause that's what no good Tsuna's do. But now's a different tune, a different story, 'cause now it's not just him alone, but his friends & himself against everyone else. Friends? ( Friends. ) It feels weird as he rolls it around on the tip of his tongue, 'cause he's never had friends before any of this & he's not used to it yet. But it feels nice. Like a kind of warm feeling in your guts & it makes him smile.
"But friends," Tsuna whispers to himself, so he can hear it & believe, "friends are amazing like that. They could be like a hurricane of mass destruction, like the wind at your face, like the sand that coils around your feet, & like the sky above ( so limitless, passionate, always blue yet so vibrant -- ), but nothing can compare. They're all that & so much more & even beyond that. & this," there's a pause in his words, as he hears the doorbell ringing & the all too familiar voice calling out a name that isn't his, but still all about him.
"Tenth! Is something the matter?"
"N-no . . ."
"Then what's wrong, Tenth?"
"W-we got interrupted a while ago, so I-I was just wondering if you wanted to finish the watermelon you brought -- I mean, it's understandable if you don't want to & that's okay but I was just thinking it'd be nice & I mean you don't have to & --" The smile on Gokudera's face shuts him up & he's looking at him with most oblivious face, but then, he's smiling too.
"That'd be nice, Tenth. I'd like that."
& this, Tsuna thinks, as he lets Gokudera inside the house & as they both head for the kitchen, is all I really need.
title. In Sequence.
genre. Fluff.
rating. G.
characters. Gokudera Hayato, Sawada Tsunayoshi; Katekyo Hitman REBORN!
warnings. EXTREME SAP. I mean what. & also the lack of 'and' 'cause I got too lazy.
wordcount. 1139.
notes. For the Tenth/final. ♥ Belated Valentine's Day gift. ilu infinity x whatev u say.
disclaimer. Bodies, limbs, thoughts, &things aren't mine. I just pull the strings &stay on the sidelines, 'cause that's where the puppeteer belongs when her dolls are strutting all over the stage.
synopsis. It's all they really need.