i really need to stop reading old journal entries.
it just makes me so sad and miss you more, and i get all puffy and red and i start crying and run out of the house and cry in my back yard and just regret everything. im sorry for yelling at you. im sorry for not calling, or ditching you at the warf dances, and not being able to comfort you at the dinner dance, or not leaving the dances with you. and im sorry for not calling and not sending all the notes i wrote you, or all the drawings and stories. im sorry for not being able to say your name like you say mine and not sitting with you in PL or in lunch. or never having lunch with you in the bathroom. please forgive me, im really sorry.
claire is right. whatever degree of friendship anyone had with you, we all miss you.
i personally miss the long nights. the sleeping outside. the chow mein. the shows and the teeshirts and the harvard square. i miss that picture that amanda took with us outside gelette stadium. we look back and hardly remember those three girls. i miss the xanga entries and the making up after little fights. i miss the sleeping on the floor because your bed cannot hold more than three. i miss the chasing toby. the fights with your mom. the running away. the escapes. the passing out.
smashhimup, buttercup, when we grow up we will have bills to pay and photos in boxes and not much more. but right now we've got silhouettes like pin-up girls and long eyelashes. the heart is just a muscle. <2
my sam...for you!monkeywrench21April 7 2004, 17:10:27 UTC
Well she's lying in our bed sweating staring at the ceiling I know her worried head is aching I know that the cause is me I could leave the bathroom light on for better dreams tonight my stability my luxury my life and i won't go neither will you turn off the phone let's sleep till two your sad eyes take and own me words aren't necessary grip the back of your neck and slowly move til it all becomes alright all becomes alright well i wake up in a cold sweat got a bone to pick with reality take a deep breath and lay back down wearing my badge of infamy got up and switched the night light cause it flickered flickered and died repeat the words 'you're not alone' to yourself 3 times and hit the light-eve6
Comments 20
And you are so unfat. So, so, so, so. You are like a tiny little pixie girls. And we know pixies are always wittle and perfect.
Mwah. Feel better. I'm always, always here.
<3
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it just makes me so sad and miss you more, and i get all puffy and red and i start crying and run out of the house and cry in my back yard and just regret everything. im sorry for yelling at you. im sorry for not calling, or ditching you at the warf dances, and not being able to comfort you at the dinner dance, or not leaving the dances with you. and im sorry for not calling and not sending all the notes i wrote you, or all the drawings and stories. im sorry for not being able to say your name like you say mine and not sitting with you in PL or in lunch. or never having lunch with you in the bathroom. please forgive me, im really sorry.
i miss you master. violet. sam.
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i personally miss the long nights. the sleeping outside. the chow mein. the shows and the teeshirts and the harvard square. i miss that picture that amanda took with us outside gelette stadium. we look back and hardly remember those three girls. i miss the xanga entries and the making up after little fights. i miss the sleeping on the floor because your bed cannot hold more than three. i miss the chasing toby. the fights with your mom. the running away. the escapes. the passing out.
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<2
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<2
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I know her worried head is aching
I know that the cause is me
I could leave the bathroom light on for better dreams tonight
my stability my luxury my life
and i won't go
neither will you
turn off the phone
let's sleep till two
your sad eyes take and own me
words aren't necessary
grip the back of your neck and slowly move til it all becomes alright
all becomes alright
well i wake up in a cold sweat
got a bone to pick with reality
take a deep breath
and lay back down
wearing my badge of infamy
got up and switched the night light
cause it flickered flickered and died
repeat the words 'you're not alone'
to yourself 3 times and hit the light-eve6
*
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