thinking ruins the mind
the following is just a bunch of thoughts, idk i'm bored
Ok so I've been thinking a lot and shit. Well I'm kind of lonely you know? Like I want to feel that companionship, but at the same time I kind of like going out with my friends and partying and not having to worry about what my boyfriend will say. But then again if I had a boyfriend he could come with me and it would be fun. Ugh, I guess what I'm saying is i want a bf. And the sad thing is I have the BIGGEST crush on one of my friends but there is NO WAY I could ever tell him. I mean it would just be too weird and I don't want to ruin my friendship with him cause he's really cool and I like him a lot as a friend. I mean I can really tell him like anything. And he tells me to talk to guys and not to be such a pussy, well I don't know if he knows I like him or what. IDK!! I'm just very confused about everything, cause there's times when I feel like he likes me back but who knows. Most likely he doesn't. I'm not his type physically so I don't think he's attracted to me. Then again I'm NOBODY'S type physically.
I just feel like I'll never meet anyone, I mean I'm 20 years old and I've never had a boyfriend. I've just had guys I hook up with. I'm sick of that bullshit, I want someone who will love me. Someone who will be there for me. I feel like i'll never find him and that's so sad. It makes me hurt inside feeling like this. ugh I should go to bed I'm pathetic
Ok so I've been thinking a lot and shit. Well I'm kind of lonely you know? Like I want to feel that companionship, but at the same time I kind of like going out with my friends and partying and not having to worry about what my boyfriend will say. But then again if I had a boyfriend he could come with me and it would be fun. Ugh, I guess what I'm saying is i want a bf. And the sad thing is I have the BIGGEST crush on one of my friends but there is NO WAY I could ever tell him. I mean it would just be too weird and I don't want to ruin my friendship with him cause he's really cool and I like him a lot as a friend. I mean I can really tell him like anything. And he tells me to talk to guys and not to be such a pussy, well I don't know if he knows I like him or what. IDK!! I'm just very confused about everything, cause there's times when I feel like he likes me back but who knows. Most likely he doesn't. I'm not his type physically so I don't think he's attracted to me. Then again I'm NOBODY'S type physically.
I just feel like I'll never meet anyone, I mean I'm 20 years old and I've never had a boyfriend. I've just had guys I hook up with. I'm sick of that bullshit, I want someone who will love me. Someone who will be there for me. I feel like i'll never find him and that's so sad. It makes me hurt inside feeling like this. ugh I should go to bed I'm pathetic