i'll take your hair with me wrapped around my bloody knuckles as a soft spoken reminder<3

[starlitesobrite]

so today i woke up at 12:30. i called joe to see if he wanted to come over. and of course he says no. haha are you surprised? yeahh. i didn't think so. so then we fight because my friend eric dougherty's dads veiwing was today and i didn't have a ride but i also didn't wanna go by myself. so i called joe to see how he was getting there and then he

Comments

:)

[fallin4u]

i know its really NONe of my bussiness but i think you should find someone new..like other than joe. i went through a horrible break up just like you a few years back and i did exactly what your doing. where you cant stop thinkin about him with everything you do. just you gotta move on its the only way to make you stronger. its okay to be friends just dont act like you care soo much and just let him come to you. when he calls though dont answer. prove the asshole wrong and make him realize you dont need him in your life because your heather swallow and your awesome!!! all my best <33 Nicole

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[starlitesobrite]

haha no it's quite alright, if anything people giving me advice and telling me these things only makes me feel better. yeah i think about him all the time, it's horrible i wake up every morning sick to my stomache. and all i think about is calling him for him only to be ignorant to me, tell me he's busy, or tell me i'm psycho. it's so hard to move on, although i'm trying. being friends is the hardest thing in the world and i'm not strong enough. i'm really trying to do all those things, it's going to take me awhile. it would be different if i wasn't going out with him for 3 years. i just wish there was something to make this easier. but thank you so much nicole, i didn't think you cared. :]

<3

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[fallin4u]

haha aww heather..me not care..come on now..of course i do. plus what about when i needed to bitch about tommy..you and shuana were always there haha. but yes it is hard. and i could only imagine 3 years. thats crazzzy. its gonna be hard. but hes away at school now... i dont think you should try to see him or even go up there at all for that matter, yes to see other friends but stay away from his crowd. its not worth it when you just put yourself through more pain by calling. because now he wants to make you feel like its your fault which its not at all..thats why hes doing all those things when you call. its not worth it. youre much stronger than that. take him off your Buddy list, take his number outta your phone book, take the pictures down. do it all. it helps. its gonna be hard to be friends but you have to make him come to you and it will make you realize that he still cares and actually wants the freidnship. if he doesnt call then hes not worth it or maybe he never was worth it. when you wanna call him call someone else. just

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[starlitesobrite]

i know and i'm going up to his school this weekend because my friend tara wants to go and visit them. and i promised her i'd go with. but i'm gonna try and stay away from him, we'll see. he knows how i feel and now he's just being an asshole. i know it's not my fault but i feel like it is, like i'm not what he wants and i wanna change but why should i change for anyone? it's ridiculous the way he's got me thinking. i want to take him off my buddy list but i'm so scared, i can't just cut my best friend like that. oh this is terrible, and i always seen everyone elses break ups and everyone else suffer and i thought "i hope this never happens to me" and look at me now. why did i think i had it so good? i hope he comes back to me, i really do. but he doesn't have any reason to now he's up at school theres plenty of girls who show him so much attention and he's loving it. what more could he ask for. i just can't give him what he wants. i just hope he wasn't a waste of my 3 years, because thats not fair. and thank you nicole, i'll take you